I am 48, and I've got absolutely nothing against gay lives - I have to say that up front before I make my comments on the husband who was so very critical of his young, over-weight wife (Jess) who had to very young (new) babies to contend with.
There are critical men who will always find something to criticize about their wife, and then also, in my experience, and by knowing many gay friends, men who, in their early years, were trying very hard to live straight lives but they were in their heart gay but just hadn't dealt with it and "come out" yet. I cannot count the number of men I know now who have past marriages with children! And they were horrors as husbands to their wives, who kept trying harder and harder to please their every upset.
And in the case of a "gay guy" trying to live a straight life with kids, and all that goes alone with kids - wives can have fluctuating differences in weight, appearances, and clean house vs. living with kids, or arguing about being able to go out and be with adults vs. doing kids things, I have watched my friends be VERY critical of their straight wives before they themselves "came out." They blamed everything wrong in their marriage somehow on the spouse. Sometimes the spouse was thin and absolutely gorgeous - so the critical husband had to really search to find things to criticize - I remember infertility even being criticized and blamed on the woman before they had a surrogate and then later the man "came out."
I would also add that after "coming out" most of these went through divorce but came out as friends...once the truth was out, and the criticizing stopped, they realized the initial attraction was a strong friendship.
So we go to Jess. I think she either has a very critical husband who, if she loses weight, will find more to criticize, or, perhaps there are some deeper issues here in this VERY young marriage. As an aside, Dr. Phil never seems to comment on how YOUNG many of these marriages / kids are - and how hard that alone must be. Jess's husband should be walking with Jess with the boys in strollers (keeps her safe and losing weight and boys corralled at the same time) or watch the boys at the park while she speedwalks the perimeter of the park. These are just some of the things I did to keep my weight down after kids. Because it's hard - you have to cook for kids, you can't just up and run away from kids, you've got to watch them, and add housework and a job and it's one tough hill to climb when you're restricted on income.
Jess and hubby need to realize the whole world is there to criticize them, and everyone, even hubby - haha, can be very easily criticized as far as appearance. It is with loving words that we encourage, not mean words. Telling someone that all you care about is their health and that you love them is the best thing you can say. Buying and keeping only "good" foods in the house is the best thing you can do.
And remember that some husbands just aren't ever going to be happy or content - and ask yourself WHY?
We've all got a mom, and they all come with different personalities, and in different shapes and sizes. While some are more traditional, like June Cleaver, others are controlling drama queens. First meet Jessica. She says that becoming a mom was one of the happiest moments in her life, but it has taken a huge toll on her marriage. She gained over 50 pounds having her children, and now her husband says she looks like the Pillsbury Doughboy. He even points to pigs and says to his kids, 'Look, there's Mommy.' What does Dr. Phil say this couple must do to restore their relationship? Next, Kathleen calls her mom, Grace, the biggest drama queen. She says she's so controlling, she will throw tantrums if things don’t go her way. Grace says she's just a concerned, caring mother who likes to state her opinion. Will Grace admit her behavior is over the top, and is she ready to make a change? Then, 14-year-old Sheri claims she has the most embarrassing mom in the world! She says her mom, Monique, will break into song and dance anywhere at anytime. But will she at the Dr. Phil show? And, you won't want to miss Robin's favorite Mother’s Day present ideas. Join the discussion.
