Quote From: minister4himWell, I am weighing in here before seeing the actual program, but I would like to make two statements. One is in response to this message. I don't know what type of man Jessica's husband is. He may very well be a pig for not being more understanding of her situation/condition. But at the same time for you to say that he is a pig because he wants his wife to loose weight is also wrong. We are going from end of the spectrum to the other. You saying that because she has gotten pregnant and gained weight that its alright. Everyone woman is different, but having children is not an excuse for being overweight. My wife has had two children is now 40 years old and she is in better shape than the day we got married. Could Jessica's husband speak to her in a more loving way while conveying his dissatisfaction, I positive he could.
The next point that I would like to state would be directed toward a comment that Dr. Phil made during one the previews for this show. He asked Jessica if she gained this weight after getting pregnant? To which her response was "yes". Dr. Phil proceeded to ask who got her pregnant, at which point she looks at her husband. There so many places I could go here. Did he provide the sperm, yeah. Did she provide the egg, well yeah. Are we now to blame the husband fo the weight that our wives gain while being pregnant? If so, why stop there? We should be charged for every crime that any woman has committed from having Post Pardom Depression, and I could go on. C'mon, let's keep the blame where it needs to be. Jessica is responsible for her own body. What she needs to do is be satisfied with her own body. If this is the weight she is satisfied and being at, then so be it. It is also up to her to loose weight for her husband if she thinks that will please him, but she also needs to do because she wants to. Also, Jessica's husband need to come to grips that this may be the weight that Jessica will be. Did he marry her strictly for her looks? I am not a counselor, but I bet that if they are having problems in their marriage, even if Jessica looses the weight, something else is going to be the problem. I have more to say, but I will stop there.
First, I never said he was a "pig". He married this woman, he committed before God and/or the court to be with this woman through "sickness and in health". He therefore has the problem- being shallow. Attraction extends beyond the physical, and if he wasn't attracted to anything but her body, then he shouldn't have made the commitment to be with a woman he had nothing in common with and wasn't attracted enough to her personality to LOVE her. He has to take accountability for walking down that aisle and signing that marriage license, because he has no one to blame but himself.
Second, just because she's big doesn't give him THE RIGHT TO ABUSE HER! This is ABUSE. Psychological and verbal ABUSE. Why is THAT okay? If you think it's okay to belittle someone to manipulate them into doing what you want them to, then I feel sorry for your wife and kids.
Third, I never said it was alright to carry a bunch of weight around. IF he truly loved his wife, he wouldn't ABUSE her, so maybe your theory about him being a pig was dead on. Has it occurred to you that maybe she has a health problem that keeps her from losing the weight? Hypothyroidism, depression, Cushing's Disease, PPD, Diabetes, and so on keep people from losing weight. You seem uneducated about this, but it's either extremely cruel or extremely ignorant to assume that 1) abuse is an efficient means to control your spouse in a slavery type situation and 2) The health of the woman doesn't matter or come into play.
Fourth, I have no doubt in my mind that Jessica is dissatisfied with her weight. Do you think she WANTS to be unhealthy? Do you think she WANTS her husband to call her names, worsen the abuse and cause her to eat MORE? This isn't an issue of man-hating, as she would be the pig if the roles were reversed.
The crux of the issue here is the man's self esteem being so low that he has to "level" things to keep his wife down, a tactic used by trashy people.
We've all got a mom, and they all come with different personalities, and in different shapes and sizes. While some are more traditional, like June Cleaver, others are controlling drama queens. First meet Jessica. She says that becoming a mom was one of the happiest moments in her life, but it has taken a huge toll on her marriage. She gained over 50 pounds having her children, and now her husband says she looks like the Pillsbury Doughboy. He even points to pigs and says to his kids, 'Look, there's Mommy.' What does Dr. Phil say this couple must do to restore their relationship? Next, Kathleen calls her mom, Grace, the biggest drama queen. She says she's so controlling, she will throw tantrums if things don’t go her way. Grace says she's just a concerned, caring mother who likes to state her opinion. Will Grace admit her behavior is over the top, and is she ready to make a change? Then, 14-year-old Sheri claims she has the most embarrassing mom in the world! She says her mom, Monique, will break into song and dance anywhere at anytime. But will she at the Dr. Phil show? And, you won't want to miss Robin's favorite Mother’s Day present ideas. Join the discussion.
