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Topic : 05/12 Sister-in-Law from Hell?

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Created on : Friday, May 09, 2008, 03:52:17 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
They say when you marry, you marry the whole family. But what happens when a member of your new extended family is the source of chaos and pain? Five relatives claim their sister-in-law, Kelly, is toxic. They say she spreads gossip, sends stalking e-mails and acts self-centered and psychotic. Kelly’s father-in-law, Austin, calls her The Destroyer and says she’s hell-bent on ruining the relationship between his sons, Tim and Greg and her husband, Bill. Kelly believes she’s being unfairly targeted because she showed up in court as a witness for Greg’s ex-wife. The outspoken sister-in-law may have ruffled some feathers, but is she the only one at fault? Find out why her friend, Jennifer, feels Kelly is getting a bad rap. Join the discussion.

Find out what happened on the show.


Do you have someone that is toxic to your family? Tell us!


 
wordha
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May 10, 2008, 10:05 am PDT

The entire family?

 If two people fall in love the marriage involves only those two people. Marriage involving multiple people is polygamy and is not legal. The idea that when two marry they marry the entire family is ludicrous just completely unreal. Can you imagine? It is difficult for two people to agree and compromise on the most basic decisions in a marriage. The idea that everyone in both families would get along and agree or participate with every decision is totally incorrect.

 

 

 
 
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tobin1
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May 10, 2008, 10:36 am PDT

takes "two"

In all fights/arguments it takes two. All sides are to blame, not just the SIL. I am in a family relationship where all my in-laws are here where I live and my own family is in Montana. My SIL does not like me and it creates a large strain on the whole family. I am ready to move on and let our differences be in the past. But she refuses to forgive and forget. So again it's takes both sides to make things work out. One can't just blame this SIL for all the family problems.
 
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bjkimm21
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May 10, 2008, 10:48 am PDT

05/12 Sister-in-Law from Hell?

My nephew's wife has managed to split up our family. She is blaming our cousin's wife who is a speech therapist for not telling her that her first born son is autistic. We only saw him a few times in a year and she wasn't completely sure of all of his symptoms. The mother asked her once about his delayed speech and she told her it was nothing, since her own son didn't speak early. When they did get a diagnosis my nephew called her and she told him to send her the paperwork and she would send them to the right places to get treatment. However, something she inadvertantly said got him and his mother upset and they decided to disown the rest of the family. At first they continued to invite our kids to their extra holidays, and birthdays. Now they don't. They are our only family out here and we have nowhere else to go. They don't seem to care about us. I was close to my cousin's wife, so I guess I was guilty by association. My sister-in-law came up with some petty things that I didn't do and disowned me too. My husband was meeting his brother (the grandfather of the autistic child) for lunch from time to time and tried to talk to him, but got nowhere, so he told him he can't have it both ways and cut him off. Our cousin and his sister did the same. Our kids and my niece are in the middle and don't know what to do. Until this girl married into the family we were a very close family. Now there is animosity all over the place on all sides.
 
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hpmx59
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May 10, 2008, 11:27 am PDT

Doctor Phil Show

Doctor From Hell In-Law Phil Sister. Is that the langage that we donot go by with? Swearing to God is not--

good at all. See you on Monday May 12th, 2008. Sincerley Your. Russell Vlaanderen.-----------------------------
 
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sappy28
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May 10, 2008, 11:58 am PDT

This is my Mother in law

Wow, my mother in law is the same way. I became pregnant at 16. The father and I started fighting alot. So she took it upon her self to tell me not to have any contact with her son until the baby was born. She was the parent so I thought she new what was best. She never told him this happened. Heart broken he started resenting me. Anyway after the our son was born we reconnected. And all our love was still there, so we were trying to get back together. His mother would not have it. She lied and said I was hurting our son, she was saying I was neglecting him. She even said if I moved out on my own she would stop saying these things. So I did, then she called social services on me 5 times. She said if I never had anything to do with her son, then she would stop. She was so basest with wanted him not to like me, we knew she wouldn't stop unless he said he didn't love me. So we put it off for almost 2 years. Seeing and talking only when we knew she would have no idea.

Then she moved away :) And when she found out we moved in together. Well she started with everything again. This all started 13 years ago. And it has calmed down a bit. I just hope she realizes she needs help.

She not only lies about me, she does this with everyone in her life. You don't need to go far to find people who know she is trouble.
 
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js_stock
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May 10, 2008, 12:53 pm PDT

I feel the familys pain

Well i feel the family's pain beacuse i have a sister in law thats likes to bash me and my kids for no reason at all i have been married to her brother for about 10 years now and this has been a never ending

battle I have had to fight with his mother and along with his sister for many years now .. we had to move change or phone numbers and e-mails because shes telling the whole family im a bad person when im not !!!..... Im so sorry the family has to indoor this from a psycho weird person ... good luck and im preying for the family...hope she can get help ....
 
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lidast0911
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May 10, 2008, 1:27 pm PDT

05/12 Sister-in-Law from Hell?

I def know about sister-in-laws from hell!  I have a few!  The one thing is jealousy.  I know that sounds stupid, but i really is that case for me.  Jealous b/c of the things we have and the things we do.  I am a very easy going person and i do NOT judge people so i have no idea why they are that way.  Another is control issues.  If they don't have that control over you, then it's DUNSO!  I don't know, just my feelings
 
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housewife52
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May 10, 2008, 2:07 pm PDT

05/12 Sister-in-Law from Hell?

Quote From: sappy28

Wow, my mother in law is the same way. I became pregnant at 16. The father and I started fighting alot. So she took it upon her self to tell me not to have any contact with her son until the baby was born. She was the parent so I thought she new what was best. She never told him this happened. Heart broken he started resenting me. Anyway after the our son was born we reconnected. And all our love was still there, so we were trying to get back together. His mother would not have it. She lied and said I was hurting our son, she was saying I was neglecting him. She even said if I moved out on my own she would stop saying these things. So I did, then she called social services on me 5 times. She said if I never had anything to do with her son, then she would stop. She was so basest with wanted him not to like me, we knew she wouldn't stop unless he said he didn't love me. So we put it off for almost 2 years. Seeing and talking only when we knew she would have no idea.

Then she moved away :) And when she found out we moved in together. Well she started with everything again. This all started 13 years ago. And it has calmed down a bit. I just hope she realizes she needs help.

She not only lies about me, she does this with everyone in her life. You don't need to go far to find people who know she is trouble.

You could be describing one of my SILs. She is a trouble maker. The whole family knows it, and pretty much ignores her. She has a side where butter could melt in her mouth. She has another side where she deliberately tries to cause trouble with whoever she can. I have a civil relationship with her. I have known her for 35 years and she has always been this way. I can get along with her from a distance. I have never tried to cultivate a close relationship with her. She has often tried to get close to me, telling me I am her favorite SIL and s*** like that. I have always kept my distance. She has been jealous of both of her DILs and has spread terrible lies about them. She has spread slanderous lies about her siblings. Everything is always all about her, somebody has done something to her, etc.... She will probably be this way for the rest of her life.
 
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housewife52
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May 10, 2008, 2:15 pm PDT

05/12 Sister-in-Law from Hell?

Quote From: tobin1

In all fights/arguments it takes two. All sides are to blame, not just the SIL. I am in a family relationship where all my in-laws are here where I live and my own family is in Montana. My SIL does not like me and it creates a large strain on the whole family. I am ready to move on and let our differences be in the past. But she refuses to forgive and forget. So again it's takes both sides to make things work out. One can't just blame this SIL for all the family problems.


I agree it does take 2 to have an argument. But, because I have a SIL like the one on the show, I know sometimes ONE family member can cause a lot of trouble. The family knows how she is, and they pretty much ignore her when she starts talking about another family member. I have known her for 35 years and she is always trying to start something. I am civil to her and have always kept my distance and I have always refused to join in her gossip about other family members. And it's more than gossip, it sometimes amounts to slander. But, since we all know how she operates, we pretty much ignore her. She goes from one family member to another with gossip, gossip, gossip. She's like a pile of s***, don't stir her up she will stink worse. So, the family members avoid stirring. It's better that way.
 
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helenhg
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May 10, 2008, 4:47 pm PDT

Sister in law from hell

Our family has a sister in law like this person and we have lived with it for about 30 years.  The last 15 of them we haven't seen my brother or talked with him.  We are a family of 8 siblings and this is the only trouble we have had and I am nearly 60.  This woman is a toxic person who is able to walk into a room and in a short amount of time people are arguing about stuff.  She is the only person I have felt like hating and she has caused my Mum a lot of anxieity in her old age.  It is now better for everyone concerned not to have anything to do with her or my brother.  My brother thinks she can walk on water and that is fine for him, but he can live with her luckily we no longer have to.
 
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