Message Boards

Topic : 08/13 Babysitter Gone Bad

Number of Replies: 211
New Messages This Week: 0
Last Reply On:
Created on : Friday, May 09, 2008, 03:54:58 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 05/13/08) She was the most sought-after nanny in her neighborhood. Moms trusted her, and kids adored her. But Stephanie, 23, has been hiding a secret for two years: She’s addicted to crack and heroin. Stephanie’s mother, Kim, says she’s tried everything to help her daughter, but “when does a child listen to a parent?” Dr. Phil has some hard questions for Kim. Is she a bad influence on her addicted daughter? Joani, a former addict and guest, caught shocking evidence on videotape. Then, who does Stephanie think is partly responsible for her downward spiral? An absent father, a devoted best friend, an incarcerated boyfriend and two former employers  -- Stephanie hears from them all. Will this be the wake-up call she needs to enter rehab? Plus, when former guest and heroin addict, Sarah, shares her recovery story, will it inspire Stephanie to change her life before her addiction kills her?  Share your thoughts, join the discussion.

Find out what happened on the show.



If you or a loved one has an addiction, find support here.

As of January, 2009, this message board will become "Read Only" and will be closed to further posting. Please join the NEW Dr. Phil Community to continue your discussions, personalize your message board experience, start a blog and meet new friends.

May 13, 2008, 7:52 am CDT

05/13 Babysitter Gone Bad

Quote From: toomanytears

i find Dr. Phil to be one of the most respected, influential person on t.v. today, I watch the show everyday, and even though i do not have young children to worry about, I do have 2 adult children that are drug addicts, i have been trying to save them for years, but i have found out through counseling , I cannot save them anylonger, they have to want to save themselves, my daughter is a heroine addict, and my son is a crack addict, unfortunatly they are paying their price for the choices they made, i am a mother heart broken, because, i know my husband and i raised our children to know right from wrong, i watched the show with the twin addicts, and it was as if i was seeing my daughter. I just wanted to write to say, Dr Phil, you are a wonderful person, because you help so many people, that have lost all hope. I pray that my children, someday will turn their lives around before it is too late.   a broken hearted mother.  
I feel for you.  I'm a recovering addict and until I got clean, I didn't realize what I did to my family.  Some members of my family are also addicts and it seems the more I try to help, the further they go into denial.  It's very hard to let go and put it into Gods hands, but eventually that's what you have to do.  Sometimes I just want to grab them and shake them hard.  They don't realize what they're doing to their family, and most importantly what they're missing out on in life.  The years I used were the darkest and a waste.  I hurt so many people, most of all my children.  Find yourself a support group you're comfortable with.  I'm praying for you.
 
May 13, 2008, 8:07 am CDT

She needs help

Quote From: princessgina

This is one of the many reasons why i don't trust peole to watch my child. Too many bad things can happen.

 This girl is going to fall into the same trap like my niece is she a mother and is 19 years old and has a boyfriend who doesn't understand what she has done to our family especially me and her mother adn her uncle i think the relationship with her mother is over for now and I hope maybe they will get back together again someday I don't know but I hope that girl will get help as well as her mother they need at that rehab

center Dr.Phil mentioned LaCenda Rehab Center in Calforinia.

 
May 13, 2008, 8:37 am CDT

This is crazy...

First of all, I want to say that I feel a little sorry for Stephanie because it is usually hard for anyone who is addicted to anything to stop.  Especially if something about that addiction makes them feel good, even for a second.  One thing I noticed about her is that she really wanted to change.  She kept going back to when she "used to" babysit and she missed and enjoyed it.  She also hated calling herself a "junkie".  The good thing is she recognized the problem.  How many addicts out there would even recognize the fact that they're addicts.

 

Secondly, her mother needs to realize that she leads by example.  She's the mother.  She said, "when do children listen to their parents?"  The answer to that is when the parent cares enough to take action.  You can't expect her to listen to you about not taking drugs when she see's you getting drunk all your life.  I mean you're not even helping your daughter out....let alone leading her in the right direction.  Yah you made mistakes when you were young.  GET OVER IT!!!  She's full of excuses and never taking responsibility for her own actions.  She's weak and she needs to wake up before she really does lose her daughter.  Maybe even herself.

 

Third, that boyfriend has to go.  He's no good.  He's trash to her.  No good boyfriend would abuse their girlfriend.  Even better, no good man would even think about laying a hand on a women.  LOSER!!!  Move on.  She deserves better. 

 

Fourth, I understand how she feels with what she went through with her father.  That is a tough situation, but you gotta let that go.  Keeping all those feelings inside you will just tear you up.  I learned something in life that has freed me to this point.  It's called forgiveness.  It's hard to forgive, but when you do you'll realize that all that time you held unforgiveness toward that person didn't even bother them at all.  You'll realize that you were only hurting yourself all that time.  It's hard, but you need to forgive. 

 
May 13, 2008, 8:38 am CDT

So true!

Quote From: kelleigh

this girl is your typical addict. she appears to be a victim at all turns and blames some unseen "devil" rather than accept responsibility for her own actions. as for shooting suboxone (she mentioned doing so at the beginning of the show) i can tell you personally that you CANNOT shoot this drug!! it is used to help opiate dependant people maintain sobriety. it is a sublingual tablet which means you let it disolve under your tongue. it must be taken this way. shooting this drug will cause immediate withdrawel and possibly send the person taking it to the ER. so i guess what i m trying to say here is this girl started out lying to Dr. Phil. i don't know what the doctor knows about suboxone but i have to tell you i was coming out of my skin when this girl shrugged of "shooting" suboxone! this is a drug that i am currently taking, not abusing and thanks to it and a healthy life plan and therapy i have been sober for over a year. i am offended when i hear of someone abusing this drug. it is for these reasons it has become so difficult to find a dr. willing to prescribe it and get the proper certification required to take on and keep patients such as myself. opiate dependancy is very ugly but it's very possible to live a life free of drugs and the vicious cycles addicts so often find themselves repeating. this young woman even seems to take pride as she tells dr. phil that while she can take it and not feel high he would be "knocked on his butt" if he took it...come on!!! i sure hope dr. phil makes this girl get real before the end of the episode. that is what i love so much about the good dr after all. He makes you give it to him straight but so far she seems to be getting away with being a victim and making light of a rather serious issue. as i close this post this girl is STILL laughing!!! why are these people sitting on that stage making light of this situation they are in??? the mother needs to be seperated from her daughter if she is to ever succeed, in my unprofessional opinion. she is an addict herself as well as an enabler.
This is true... I have not seen the show yet.. It wont start till 3... but, I personally am on suboxone.. The only one you could shoot up would be the Subutex, the drug the doctor gives you the first couple days of the treatment.. Then they switch you to suboxone and thats so people wont abuse it.. Where I live it is very difficult to get on the treatment.. There are only about 5 Drs in the entire state. I consider myself to very lucky to have found the help I needed.. People who abuse this drug are not serious enough to be clean in the first place, it makes me sad to see people like myself who are very serious and really want the help but are finding it hard because other people are ruining it..
I hear all the time people getting "high" off of suboxone.. I personally dont get "high" off the drug, so the people that are, are not taking the prescription they way its intended and thats too bad, it really does work for the right person.
Im curious to see how Dr Phil treats her.. He does not seem to be the type to have patients for drug abusers..
 
May 13, 2008, 11:56 am CDT

babysitter

There was a time when I too had life challenges until I learned two things in which I hope Joni can find. One is how do you deal with everyday life without drugs, start with rehab and don't go through the motions but make it a part of life. Two: yesterday is gone, take care of today and tomorrow will take care of itself. Sometimes that may be lived by minutes or seconds, and that is OK. I am hopeful for Joni to make it with a good support system. Jeanette
 
May 13, 2008, 12:24 pm CDT

Valerie Via's Death

 My best friend in high school died from shooting up.  She was just like the girl on the show.  She was very smart and scored almost a perfect score on the sats. Her mother had passed away when she was a child which always upset her.  Her father was a Social worker.  She was 27 when she o'd.  I went to her funeral and the older boyfriend and his friends were there.  I wrote their license plates down.  I investigated her death and when I told the police they said no one reported Valeries death.  They said usually the hospital calls it in.  The police did find out that Valerie died from drugs, but by then it was to late to arrest anyone.  There is currently an investigation, but it still kills me that I couldnt stop the inevitable.  I visit Valerie very often. 
 
May 13, 2008, 12:27 pm CDT

Babysitter

I just posted and I mistakingly had Joni when this should be in regards to Stephenie. Sorry I will have to try to get the right persons name. Jeanette
 
May 13, 2008, 12:33 pm CDT

Sad

I have witnessed first hand someone close to me deal w/ heroin addiction, so this show is difficult to watch, what's more unbelievable to me is Stephanie's mother, not only does nothing to try to help her daughter, she is actually doing coke and pouring her drinks.  It's no wonder Stephanie is the way she is, the mom looks like she's high too!  I pray that Stephanie will overcome her addiction, I'm sure Dr Phil will make resources available, she seems so bright and so beautiful imagine how she could be if she's clean.  When she does recover I hope she has nothing to do w/ that horrible mother.
 
May 13, 2008, 12:51 pm CDT

She isn't in denial!

This mother is not in denial here, she just doesn't care.  She is not a mother to this child she is trying to be a friend.  She doesn't need a friend she needs a parent, a guide a person to show her the way.   I am the mom of an addict, in recovery for now, and when my child was at home I hid EVERYTHING!  I'm talking down to the asprin and the rubbing alcohol.  You just have to make it a CLEAN environment for this addict. 

We got our child into rehab, a couple of times (the first time doesn't allways take!)  I just have no words to express the anger and distaste I have for this mother.  I feel for Stephanie, she is an out of control addict, she needs help, she is a child.  The mother, I just can't express my feelings toward her, I am livid just watching!  Get tough Dr. Phil like we know you can, tell her what a pathetic parent she is and get her some help too.  As far as the father, he has done what a lot of parents do, just gave up and cut all ties.  Some people just don't have it in them to stick it out with an addict child, I totally understand those feelings and I don't berate him for it.  These children lie to you, steal from you, do all kinds of horrible things to you, just to get high and some parents just can't stick in there thru all of that.  At least he is not enableing her to be an addict. 

 
May 13, 2008, 12:56 pm CDT

Hello???

Ok, here I sit, 45 minutes into this show, spitting nails. Mumzie has WHAT?? Morphine, percoset, ambien and xanax??? How many doctors has she got??? An addict raising an addict, a woman in total denial of her own problems being sure to point out her daughters issues, yet protecting herself?  I wonder if they can get a deal on bulk treatment? Yes, Stephanie has a problem, a big one, does seem to want to get help, or is putting on a good show of it. Mumzie however needs as much, as she is abusing her medication in a big way... I have a stepmother in the same boat, popping percoset like popcorn, exhibiting all the signs of a typical addict--just like mumzie here. These medications are to be used as directed, and supervised by a medical doctor, and this woman is exactly why it is getting increasingly difficult, at least in canada, to access these medications, even when needed. So great, boyfriend is in jail, another addict. If Stephanie gets treatment, and its successful, she goes back to Devin the addict, Mom the addict...how long is she going to be able to be successful? Sorta like hiring a former pyromaniac in a match factory??? My opinion, from both watching this and living the same thing...someone needs their head slapped, and they should all be in treatment! I hope to god Stephanie gets the counselling she needs, and her father steps up to the plate to help her stay clean.
 
First | Prev | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | Next | Last