Topic : 05/14 "I'm Hot, You're Not"

If you spent all your life, having parents allow their children to point and make nasty comments about fat people like yourself, you are going to be resentful. I agree the problem is not with the child, IT'S THE PARENTS. Until PARENTS realize their child's behaviour will not only impact others but the child as well, there's not much you can do. I'm tired of excuses for lazy parents allowing their children to be terrors to adults, and simply dismiss it as "boys will be boys" or what have you.

Janine's comments are somewhat immature. However, how many times do you think she's been bullied by other people's children, because of her weight. How she's felt trapped and helpless, because if she says anything against that child, the parents will throw a screaming dramatic fit over, "HOW COULD YOU SAY THAT TO A CHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLLLLDDDDD!" Instead of the parent realizing the whole ordeal is THEIR OWN FAULT.

I deal with parents who refuse to understand I have Hyperacusis, that kids are going to be loud. Hyperacusis is a sensitivity to sudden loud noises. Instead of simply moving down a couple seats with their family to avoid confrontation. Instead they say, "YOUR NOT A PARENT, YOU DON'T KNOW ANNNYYYYTTTHHINNGGG!" or "MY CHILD NEVER DISBEHAVES!" How can you expect anyone to contend with people who act so immature and delusional.

I'm sure Janine has had enough problems from parents, but if you bring up parents' faults, then you will have a bunch of irresponsible parents attack the person for reminding them they are the one's responsible for their children's behaviour. So sometimes it's easier to complain about the children, even if you do come off as a bully. It's different than confronting the parents directly, it's telling them, "Listen, you want to bring your child in public. You see to it they behave. You don't want to do that, then stay away from me." It's not being selfish, it's wanting to simply be able to go out without fear of being emotionally abused by parents who think their golden children simply can do no wrong.

I agree, that it is the parents that have to make a difference.  I have taught my children to respect people, it doesn't matter what size, shape, color.  I am also one of those people that will leave before the food gets there in a restaurant if the kids are acting up, as I believe that people don't need to listen to "my" kids whining and complaining.

I can feel for Janine, I am sure that she didn't and still does not have an easy time because of her weight. I am sure that she was bullied as a kid, and even now as an adult.  But I don't think that justifies her being a "bully" to a kid.  It isn't his fault.  Would a better approach not to have been talking to the parents about it.  Letting them know how his staring makes her feel.  It isn't really fair to judge the parents either. They could be wonderful parents.  If the child was young, it may have been something that they had not encountered with him yet.  If so, then his 'first' encounter with someone who doesn't look like him... was not a positive one, and could stay with him for a lifetime.

Jesus and I are working it out.  So, its none of your concern. 

As a "Christian" you know you should pray and not judge. 

A Christian is by their walk not their talk.

Calm down there, honey.  I am very much a Christian. .   My husband is a preacher.  I love the Lord.  Not only do I talk the talk, but I WALK THE WALK. . . I used to be all into make-up and clothes, but then I found Christ and discovered a new meaning of this life.  I have given my whole life to the Lord.  I now wear long skirts - no make-up, but I still take care of myself by eating right and exercising.  I am the 1st person that would not judge.  I was simply trying to give my advice to say that this life is temp and shouldn't be treated like we last forever on this earth and abuse our bodies.  The red writing in my message was what she put. . I copied it and pasted it into my message.  Those were NOT my words.  I don't know if this is the girl on TV or just someone responding to my message.  One of my favorite scriptures in the bible is-

Luke 6:36-37  

36  Be ye therefore merciful, as your Father also is merciful.

 37  Judge not, and ye shall not be judged: condemn not, and ye shall not be condemned: forgive, and ye shall be forgiven:

I only try to offer up biblical advice on these boards.  If you look at all of my post you will see somehow I offer biblical advice.  I do know that we are NOT suppose to be temptresses, nor are we suppose to love the things in this world.  Some people get so caught up with the cares of this world.  A lot of people get deceived by the worldly things. .  

1 Peter 6-8

 6  Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time:

 7  Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.

 8  Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour:

1 John 2:15

15  Love not the world, neither the things that are in the world. If any man love the world, the love of the Father is not in him.

The things of the world are. .   clothes. . make-up. . success. . money. . houses. . cars. .  anything in this world.

Jame 1:13-15

13 Let no man say when he is tempted, I am tempted of God: for God cannot be tempted with evil, neither tempteth he any man:

 14 But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust, and enticed.

 15 Then when lust hath conceived, it bringeth forth sin: and sin, when it is finished, bringeth forth death.

Lust can be enticed. . That is why we need to, as women, to be careful of the Lust we try to bring out of a man.  Women has lust, too.  You can lust on a lot of things. . someone of the opposite sex. . food. . clothes. . lots of things!  Call me crazy, but the only thing I do is go by what is in my bible. . that is my road map.  

I care about people's souls.  This will all die - including your physical body - the soul is what matters.  The more people that truly give their life to the Lord is awesome.  Any way I can get the word of God out I will.  I want people to experience a relationship with Christ - it is beautiful.  To know one day we will die and there could be a chance to go to hell is sooo scary.  I pray more people become aware of hell - that way - they will cry out to God.  I am sinner just like everyone else.   I pray every day - study every day and try to focus on the true meaning of life - Christ! 

Take care!!!

Brennie1975, I think that was agreat post!   Good for you teaching your kids to respect people, and also for being considerate enough of others to leave a restaurant if your kids act up.  That is so refreshing to here in today's self-centered world.  I used to remove my kids from the room if they acted up when we went out to eat.  But nowadays parents let their kids scream and run around the room and it is the other diners' problem.

I too feel for Janine.  Yes, I bet she was bullied alot and in all likelihood continues to be bullied.  For the most part I liked her spunky attitude, but what she said to that child was wrong.  She is the adult and should have known better. Even saying nothing at all would have been better than the frightening comment she made to that child.

I agree with you, except for the part where you state that being fat is because of people having bad eating habits. I eat very healthily, probably more healthily than people thinner than me. I'm still 220 pounds, I'm never going to weigh less unless I put my body through a strenuous starvation..I mean diet.

You cannot tell someone's health or eating habits by merely looking at them. Your husband's bad heart most likely is out of a genetic history, not him being fat. Alot of diseases attributed to fat, are more from genetic histories, people just don't get them as a consequence of being fat.

I have a very good doctor, he knows I'm healthy at the weight I am. He doesn't push diets on me, he doesn't claim I'm not eating well enough or not exercising enough. You know why? He wasn't taught in the US' fat propaganda spewing medical schools. He's from Korea. Appearantly in Korea, they still belive in the ancient concept that one can be healthy at whatever their natural size falls as.

I agree with the one who says she is repulsed by watching obese people eating. It simply is disgusting.

And i also think that if they wanted to loose weight, they should EAT LESS!!