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Topic : 05/16 Spanking Scandals

Number of Replies: 690
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Created on : Friday, May 09, 2008, 03:59:52 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
Is physical punishment a necessary form of discipline or child abuse? First up, Monica says her five children bite, kick and talk back, and she often has to resort to beatings with a belt. Monica admits she made her four oldest children miss meals and tied their hands together until they learned to like each other. Her husband, Marshall, says Monica disciplines in anger and admits that he also hits their children out of frustration. Renowned pediatrician Dr. Jim Sears says what Monica is doing is not discipline, but abuse. Can he help the frazzled mom bring some peace to her chaotic household? Then, Elizabeth sent her 12-year-old son, Joey, to a school with a corporal punishment policy and was shocked when he came home with what she says were severe bruises. She says Joey’s beating was so severe she had to pull him out of school, and now she’s worried he won’t ever go back. How can Elizabeth and her son move past the shame? Plus, Dr. Phil hears from both sides of the spanking debate. Keila is a teacher who believes in corporal punishment and has even paddled a few students herself. Peggy is an anti-spanking advocate who says states that allow spanking also have the highest number of incarcerations and school drop-outs. What does Dr. Phil think? Join the discussion.

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June 12, 2008, 2:11 pm CDT

Just Wondering...

IF a teacher had hit my child  (I say IF, because in N.Y. it is not permitted) for what he/she considered to be bad behavior, what would happen to me if I went to that teacher and punched him/her because I considered hitting my child to be bad behavior?
 
June 12, 2008, 4:16 pm CDT

05/16 Spanking Scandals

Quote From: kathleen27

IF a teacher had hit my child  (I say IF, because in N.Y. it is not permitted) for what he/she considered to be bad behavior, what would happen to me if I went to that teacher and punched him/her because I considered hitting my child to be bad behavior?
Oh, well, nothing would happen to you because all you were trying to do was teach that teacher that her behavior was not acceptable. And of course, once you had punched him/her, then he/she would have realized the error of his/her ways and some day in the future would have thanked you for punching him/her.
 
June 13, 2008, 12:18 pm CDT

Makes Sense To Me

Quote From: housewife52

Oh, well, nothing would happen to you because all you were trying to do was teach that teacher that her behavior was not acceptable. And of course, once you had punched him/her, then he/she would have realized the error of his/her ways and some day in the future would have thanked you for punching him/her.
I know, had it ever happened, I would have gone ballistic...wonder if I'd be out of jail yet?  LOL!  I'd welcome you as my lawyer.  Oh, by the way, I was reading the posts...CONGRATULATIONS, GRANDMA!!!
 
June 13, 2008, 1:47 pm CDT

05/16 Spanking Scandals

Quote From: kathleen27

I know, had it ever happened, I would have gone ballistic...wonder if I'd be out of jail yet?  LOL!  I'd welcome you as my lawyer.  Oh, by the way, I was reading the posts...CONGRATULATIONS, GRANDMA!!!
Thank you very much! I am so excited!  And by the way, I'd say you could be your OWN counsel and do a very good job indeed.
 
June 27, 2008, 2:38 pm CDT

05/16 Spanking Scandals

I am new here but thought I would respond.  In Tennessee before corporal punishment is enforced there has to be a parental consent.  Not that it makes any difference.  I allowed the school to discipline my son while he was in elementary school.  He came home with bruises one afternoon from a paddling.  I had told the school to paddling not beat.  I went the next morning and confronted the principal and ask him if I could hit him until he had bruises.  He failed to reply.  I also told him that I had pictures and that if anyone in the school system ever paddled him again I would go to the law because as parents we would go to jail if we sent our kids to school with bruises.  As for myself I can count on one hand the number of times that I have had to spank my son.  Normally i take things away from him and that works.  He hates not being able to talk to his friends or going swimming.  Even worse he hates having in Xbox taken away.  Only when I feel that all other resorts have been used will I spank him.  The last time I got him i had to walk off and calm down then I got him good but not hard enough to leave marks.  he spit in my face and then took a swing at me.  he is only 12 and at that point something told me I had to do the drastic because if I let him get away with that it would escalate.  He is almost as tall as I am and not much smaller.  I think in a year he will be bigger than me and I refuse to be a parent that the child hits.  My husband and myself really try not to spank because that is how we were dealt with as children.

 
June 28, 2008, 11:36 am CDT

05/06 Spanking

Quote From: cher8558

 
You know this is what amazes me tcday.  You take a look at today's generation, I don't care where.  These kids have no respect anyone, not parents, not police, not teachers, NOBODY.  Because all these psychologists and psychiatrists came out with these books that we need to "reason with the children".  Give me a break.  Reason with a child who just ran out in the middle of the road and was just about obliterated.  But hey, be calm and reason, even if its the 3rd or 4th time because you have been "reasoning with him.

I am 47 years old.  My parents used spankings - and there is a difference between spankiing and beating of children.  I have always been respectful of people and authority figures.  So I have  carried this on with my children ages, 22, 18, and 14.  The have respect and there was no reasoning.

Well here's just one example of their friends.  The kid stealing 180 bucks out of the mother's wallet.  The kid telling the mother to go .... herself and you dare touch me, I will call the Children's Aid.  These kids think they have their parents by you know what.

I'll take my well respected, well rounded children who have had a few smacks in their lifetimes (they lived through it).  And if they're smart they will take these psychology books and use them on their children's asses.

Sincerely,

Cheryl Little

My grandmother used a switch on my cousin and I a few times, she made us go and get our own switch off a tree, and if it wasn't what she wanted, she went and found one. and I even got paddled in the Principal's office once, (that was the one and only time).  I have spanked my children (now 19 yrs & 23yrs)  and they will tell you I have,  But like my grandmother and parents thought me, I have instilled in my children a respect for other people, all people. I have had people and teachers tell me I have the most well behaved and respectful children.  That is the best compliment any one could ever paid me.

I also told my children years ago I would not be afraid of them, that's the problem with parents these days, they let their children get away with so much and give them way tooooooo much,  they don't know who they're children's friends are or where they go. I was a single mom for 13 yrs,  I did little league,  PTA, Volunteered at school, took them to church and taught them respect.  Sometimes working 3 or 4 jobs.  My kids aren't perfect and make mistakes but they own up to their mistakes and take responsibility. Parents need to step up and take the responsibility for the children they raised, It's not always the kids fault, they learn what they are taught !!!!!!!!!  Parents, talk to your children, know who their friends are, talk to their teachers, coaches, sunday school teachers, any one who has an impact on their lives.  The rule in our house was "If we don't meet the parents, you don't go any where with your friends" 

Sincerely,

Audrey G.

 
August 14, 2008, 9:52 am CDT

GODS WORD

Quote From: markh877

Absolutely. Try lighter discipline first and hopefully  that will work.  But if it doesn't

I don't want to have someone telling I can't spank, because they personally

believe it should not be done. Each child and situation is different and I want to

have the option to spank, if in fact it is necessary.

 

 

    Spare the rod and spoil the child.

 

     Provs.     Look it up

 

      Now if not the bottom, Then where would you spank??    I would not spank their face hand foot   belly,So It must be the bottom.  (the seat of educ.) 

 
October 16, 2008, 6:52 pm CDT

what are we teaching our children

ive just watched this programme as it has just screened this afternoon in new zealand, i have only smacked my daughter once in her 5 years and i dont think it did any good at all, there are other ways for disciplining without teaching our children that its ok to hit other people, here are a few ways that i have found very productive instead of destructive, id like to start with the school aproach first, instead of physically hurting or scaring achild try the aproach of missing out on play time at recess or even writing a sentence such as "i should be a good person" 500 times on some paper or maybe even miss out on a school trip. i dont think its very constructive to hurt children as they are at school to learn but what do you teach a child who gets hit, thats right when you hit a child at school you are teaching them that its ok to hurt people and thats not a very nice thing to teach young impressionable minds. now id like to talk about the home where children are most beaten, there are other ways to deal with things instead of throttling your children, there are things such as no tv or go to bed early or missing out on treats or being grounded, i hope my ideas will help your families to grow healthy and happy, god bless you all.
 
October 27, 2008, 7:08 pm CDT

05/16 Spanking Scandals

I was raised in a home where spanking was definitely the form of discipline. I have no emotional or physical scarring. The Bible says "Spare the rod, spoil the child." I have worked in a school, where I know the kids are not getting disciplined (spanked) and they are the worst behaved, disrespectful children. The school that I worked in where the children were disciplined (spanked) had the best behaved children. Children need to have boundaries set for them and consequences for going past those boundaries. There is nothing wrong with spanking a child, if it is done in a Biblical way. God created us with a part of our bodies (bottom) that is there to be spanked. It is well cushioned, and there is nothing to break by spanking a child there. I am strongly against child abuse, but spanking is something completely different. I also think spanking should be done with a implement, such as a wooden spoon. The hands are supposed to be a loving thing for the child, not a punishment. I believe if America got back to how it was founded (on the Bible) and started spanking their children again, it would improve sooooo much!
 
October 28, 2008, 11:57 am CDT

Seriously

I live in Sweden and on right now is Spaniking Scandals.

 

Seriously. How is it possible that the authorities did not intervene immediately when the show aired? Is child abuse ok according the US law??!!

 

I'm so upset I can't even begin to explain how I fell right now. Except maybe to say that without any hesitation I'd adopt the children if it was possible. Is it possible?

 

I really do not understand why no action was taken against the parents.

 

Dr Phil?

 
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