Topic : 05/16 Spanking Scandals

I am the product of an abusive mother - just like the mom on todays show and I can tell you I have absolutely no simpathy for her AT ALL.  Your children lack guidence, YOURS.  When they are aimlessly going from one thing to another why not give them something more constructive to do with their time. DA!

Being the youngest of three my mission was to try to avoid that lady called "Mom". Did not work I still had broken ribs, dislocated jaw and deep bruses and that was before I stared school.

Note TO THE TEACHER WITH THE PADDLE: By the time I was 12 years old no one outside my household would dare touch me. No I did not join a gang, I helped organize one. I graduated in 1967 ( the real olden days of none child hood rights). corporal punishment was part of the school program and even in Junior High the Vice Principal knew better than to use his weapon unon me.

Teacher what is the remody... It is the oldest language there is: Please & Thank You! Trust me to paddle an already abused child only makes you more of the problem and there will never be the RESPECT you desire. The child you said you could paddle until they could not move is more than likely already being beaten at home and they will never feel the pain of your weapon, but you will help fuel the internal anger. The Teacher's who helped put me onto a better path showed the value through kindness, sometimes it had to be creative kindness - such as 6th grade my teacher took me out of class, he could see I was upset and being, at that time, unwilling to talk he ASKED me if I could HELP HIM clean up the cloke room. It gave he something constructive to do and helped work off some pent up anxiety.

Please teacher's try a different way of managing the children your rewards will be much greater.

Thank you for listening

Romona

I watched the show on spanking today and I was absolutely DISGUSTED!!!

I cannot believe the USA allows corporate punishment in schools!

Being from Canada, and currently in school specializing in Child and Youth Work, I find this particularly disturbing.

In schools in Canada, it is banned, and illegal - and for good reasons. The way I feel is that: Why can teachers hit/spank children and not be punished for it. However, parents can do as little as tap a child and get them taken away.

Spanking/hitting/abuse of any form should be ILLEGAL no matter what the circumstances.

And for you teachers that say "spend a day in our shoes and this will look okay", I have, and it is NOT OKAY!

Monica mentioned this on the show, but let Dr. Phil shut her down without explaining that statement.  Let me explain in from my experience. My dad took a belt to my butt on three occasions.  I was 5, 12, and 14.  It worked for me because it made my understand that what I did on each occasions was unacceptable.  I am now 38 and hold no resentment against my dad.  He did what he thought was best to teach me a lesson. Today we are told we can't do that to our kids.  We should give them a time out, or take away their Playstation.  What lesson does that teach?  If my dad had asked me, "Do you want a strapping or lose your Atari for a week?", guess which I would have chose? 

I have three boys.  I have grounded them, taken away privileges, and given time outs.  It doesn't work!  They don't care.  Once it's over, the behavior continues.  And why shouldn't it?  They haven't really been punished. But if I threaten a spanking,  their behavior does change.

I think it's all about the times.  All who are part of my generation or older, think about when we were growing up.  We listened and did what we were told.  Either by parents or teachers.  We knew if we didn't listen we would get disciplined.  There was no such thing as ADHD when we were growing up.  We knew if we didn't pay attention there would be Hell to pay.  But today,  if a kid isn't paying attention in class, they are ADHD!  When did ADHD appear as an excuse?  Wasn't it about the time the government decided we can't discipline our kids?

Back when we were growing up, when our parents and teachers were allowed to discipline us,  how many school shootings were there?  I can't remember any. But over that last ten years, where kids get away with anything because we can't discipline them, how many have their been?

I don't want to spank my boys.  My dad cried each time he took a belt to my ass.  And I'm sure I would do the same.  But we can't send our children out into this world thinking that each time they misbehave all that's going to happen is a time out. That's just not how this world works.

Monica mentioned this on the show, but let Dr. Phil shut her down without explaining that statement.  Let me explain in from my experience. My dad took a belt to my butt on three occasions.  I was 5, 12, and 14.  It worked for me because it made my understand that what I did on each occasions was unacceptable.  I am now 38 and hold no resentment against my dad.  He did what he thought was best to teach me a lesson. Today we are told we can't do that to our kids.  We should give them a time out, or take away their Playstation.  What lesson does that teach?  If my dad had asked me, "Do you want a strapping or lose your Atari for a week?", guess which I would have chose? 

I have three boys.  I have grounded them, taken away privileges, and given time outs.  It doesn't work!  They don't care.  Once it's over, the behavior continues.  And why shouldn't it?  They haven't really been punished. But if I threaten a spanking,  their behavior does change.

I think it's all about the times.  All who are part of my generation or older, think about when we were growing up.  We listened and did what we were told.  Either by parents or teachers.  We knew if we didn't listen we would get disciplined.  There was no such thing as ADHD when we were growing up.  We knew if we didn't pay attention there would be Hell to pay.  But today,  if a kid isn't paying attention in class, they are ADHD!  When did ADHD appear as an excuse?  Wasn't it about the time the government decided we can't discipline our kids?

Back when we were growing up, when our parents and teachers were allowed to discipline us,  how many school shootings were there?  I can't remember any. But over that last ten years, where kids get away with anything because we can't discipline them, how many have their been?

I don't want to spank my boys.  My dad cried each time he took a belt to my ass.  And I'm sure I would do the same.  But we can't send our children out into this world thinking that each time they misbehave all that's going to happen is a time out. That's just not how this world works.

Ed, by my read, it looks like you're contradicting yourself.

You oppose spanking, yet you yourself admit you are guilty of it.

This is what I mean about spanking, when done appropriately and in a

measured way, not to vent frustrations of the parent or teacher,

does no long term harm to a child, in fact it does the opposite,

helping reasonable parents and teachers impose and enforce limits that

are necessary to a child's future well being and helping make that

child a productive and respectful member of society. Some children

don't need to be spanked, but some do. Effectively banning spanking,

by making the government prosecute parents and teachers, doesn't take into account the complicated nature of different child personalities.

Some children need stronger 'medicine' than others and certain parts of

the body like the buttocks have been effectively designed by God/Nature

to absorb this type of medicine. We should not try to impose yet

unproven standards and methods on everyone ex. banning spanking,

without carefully putting newer methods of discipline through the test of time to prove their long term effectiveness.