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Topic : 08/06 Nuptial Nightmares

Number of Replies: 224
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Created on : Friday, May 16, 2008, 02:19:56 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 05/19/08) Many little girls dream of the perfect wedding day with a fairytale gown, beautiful flowers and their handsome groom, but Dr. Phil's guests say their wedding bells hit a sour note. Amy says the day she and Steve tied the knot turned into a disaster. The sun scorched the guests, then there was a downpour, the wedding arch fell and hit the pastor, and the cake crumbled as they were cutting it. She says it was a huge dream shattered, and she can't move past it. Steve says he had a blast, and Amy needs to lighten up. What does Dr. Phil think? Then, shortly after Mandy and her husband, Kris, said "I do," a three-story deck collapsed, and they and 30 of their family and friends were seriously injured.  Mandy says she left her wedding strapped to a stretcher, and she and Kris spent their wedding night in the emergency room. Although this took place over two years ago, the couple thinks about it every day. How can they overcome their guilt? And, Kurt and Brandi recently renewed their vows because they say they wanted a fresh start to their seven-year marriage. Just months after their ceremony, Kurt filed for divorce when he found out a secret Brandi had been keeping. Will the results of polygraph tests inspire this couple to make their marriage work or end it for good? Share your thoughts, join the discussion.

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May 19, 2008, 7:25 am CDT

Sense of humor

Sounds to me like Amy is a little spoiled and has no sense of humor.  I would give anything to even have had a wedding!!!!  Also she needs some common sense.  You don't cut a cake looking somewhere else, you don't leave cats out able to run thru the house with something like a graduation cake sitting out...HEEELLLLOOOO!!!
 
May 19, 2008, 8:04 am CDT

A Message for Amy

I think Amy and I got married on the same day in July of 2006. The sky opened up and poured as I was walking into the church. A tornado touched down on my brother's street delaying them from leaving for the church with my Mother, the Jamie Farr Golf Classic let out due to the rain and my sister's were stuck in traffic on the way. My inlaws all from out of town, had to pull out maps to find an different routes to the church due to roads being flooded. When I was supposed to be walking down the aisle there were 6 people at the church. The Pastor, my husband, myself, the organist, one brother-in law(the best man) and his wife. The wedding started an hour late and I was popping Nitro due to chest pains. It ended well once everyone arrived and we had a beautiful ceremony followed by an equally wonderful reception. But even if it had all went badly I would have still been blessed with a wonderful loving husband. I look back now and laugh when I think about it because I actually asked the Pastor if he thought this was a sign God didn't want me to get married. So Amy think about how blessed you are to have Steve and learn to laugh about the small stuff, things happen. It's called life and you just move on and thank God for what you have.
 
May 19, 2008, 9:37 am CDT

05/19 Nuptial Nightmares

Quote From: housewife52

We were married 34 years yesterday. We are certainly not perfect, but we are chugging along nicely, thank you. We are happy where we are at. We got married on an island in the lake in blue jeans. My husband's sister's husband is a minister. He married us and my SIL and my brother were the witnesses. My brother ferried us to the island in a little john boat. DrP has already had several of these shows with the brides claiming that they cannot get over thier wedding mishaps. I can't stand to see another one. It makes absolutely no sense to me that a bride cannot move on and let the wedding day go and deal with the reality of making a marriage work. I have no intention of watching, I have already seen enough of these types of shows. I have no sympathy for these belly aching brides. Period.
I am with you 100%. It's one thing to be disappointed that a planned party went badly...it's another thing to let if effect you for YEARS and let it effect your real life...


 
May 19, 2008, 10:03 am CDT

05/19 Nuptial Nightmares

To Amy : your husband seems to have the right attitude about what you call a "disaster wedding"....why can't you?

 

In the grand scheme of things, so what if everything didn't go perfectly? Big deal! You have your health, what seems to be a great MARRIAGE, and I don't see you two going hungry, or digging out after an earthquake, or trying to find lost relatives in the aftermath of a cyclone that has leveled everything around you, or trying to survive in a war zone........do I have to go on??

 

Stop whining and get down on your knees and thank God for all that you do have!

 

One imperfect day in your life.....or two or three...or a hundred.....is called "life", sweetie. Deal with it and move on! Come back and talk to us when you have had to deal with a REAL disaster and perhaps you can find some sympathy then.   

 
May 19, 2008, 10:20 am CDT

05/19 Nuptial Nightmares

Quote From: cndrlla

To Amy : your husband seems to have the right attitude about what you call a "disaster wedding"....why can't you?

 

In the grand scheme of things, so what if everything didn't go perfectly? Big deal! You have your health, what seems to be a great MARRIAGE, and I don't see you two going hungry, or digging out after an earthquake, or trying to find lost relatives in the aftermath of a cyclone that has leveled everything around you, or trying to survive in a war zone........do I have to go on??

 

Stop whining and get down on your knees and thank God for all that you do have!

 

One imperfect day in your life.....or two or three...or a hundred.....is called "life", sweetie. Deal with it and move on! Come back and talk to us when you have had to deal with a REAL disaster and perhaps you can find some sympathy then.   

I agree so much!

And I don't know about you, but I think it would be incredibly romantic to be cooped up in a hotel because of bad weather with my husband. LOL!
 
May 19, 2008, 11:01 am CDT

One Day Does Not a Marriage Make

I loved my wedding.  I had 9 people total at my wedding.  Just my family and mine and my husband's four best friends.  The nicest thing about a small wedding with just your closest friends is that it doesn't matter if things are not perfect.  They are their for you, not you their for them.  I think that a wedding should be about having people around you that are going to celebrate with you and be happy for you.  If you feel like you have to put on a show for your guests and that you somehoe fail if things do not go perfectly, then I think you have invited the wrong people. 

 

I was married in Maui, where my mother-in-law lived and all I had to do was show up with my wedding gown.  She picked my flowers, picked the cake, ordered the food and she truly loved doing it for me.  It was my day to enjoy being with my husband and enjoying my friends.  Our limo broke down in Hana so we didn't have that , but we made it to the wedding and had a great time! 

 

Besides the wedding lasts a day and a marriage is a lifetime.  I would not take back a second of my wedding. 

 
May 19, 2008, 11:07 am CDT

05/19 Nuptial Nightmares

Quote From: PennyLane78

I agree so much!

And I don't know about you, but I think it would be incredibly romantic to be cooped up in a hotel because of bad weather with my husband. LOL!
Yessir! A nice fire going in the fireplace.....some nice wine....rain hitting a tin roof.....been there!
 
May 19, 2008, 11:19 am CDT

05/19 Nuptial Nightmares

Quote From: cndrlla

To Amy : your husband seems to have the right attitude about what you call a "disaster wedding"....why can't you?

 

In the grand scheme of things, so what if everything didn't go perfectly? Big deal! You have your health, what seems to be a great MARRIAGE, and I don't see you two going hungry, or digging out after an earthquake, or trying to find lost relatives in the aftermath of a cyclone that has leveled everything around you, or trying to survive in a war zone........do I have to go on??

 

Stop whining and get down on your knees and thank God for all that you do have!

 

One imperfect day in your life.....or two or three...or a hundred.....is called "life", sweetie. Deal with it and move on! Come back and talk to us when you have had to deal with a REAL disaster and perhaps you can find some sympathy then.   

You know, I've been thinking, and I have to add something to my above post.

 

I always DVR the show so I can watch it again and then, if I post something, I can be sure of my facts. When I went back and watched it again, something hit me: the look on Amy's face when the couple who had a REAL disaster when the deck collapsed was up there talking about it. The camera went to Amy for just a few seconds, but the look on her face was one of realization.....she got it. You could see she really cared about this other couple.

 

I'm going to go out on a limb here, and say this: I don't think Amy is a shallow person; she's probably very sweet and caring and a good person....just young. And, when you're young, you don't often think of the rest of the world; just your immediate life and what's important to you personally....so let's not be too hard on her, okay? 

 

It's been awhile since the show was taped, and the recent world disasters, and the ones here in the Southern U.S. hadn't happened yet. I'll bet that those things, coupled with the show, made Amy realize that her wedding day being full of glitches wasn't that big a deal.....and I hope it did the same for the rest of you out there who lose your minds over small things.

 

I am donating to disaster relief, myself....how about others out there? Let's be grateful for what we do have, and help those who aren't as fortunate?  Just do what you can; it all counts.  

 
May 19, 2008, 12:33 pm CDT

Nuptial Nightmares

I'm sympathetic to the first couple about things not going exactly as planned on their wedding day, and I understand the frustration/stress associated with the "big day" and how that increases when unplanned things happen. There comes a time, however, when you have to look past the "things" and look at the big picture - the reason for the day. The day is meant for 2 people to enter into the covenant of marriage together. My wedding day was not at all how I imagined it. We had to push it back 5 months because my husband was deployment to Iraq was extended by three months and he couldn't take leave until 2 months after that. Then, when we were in our hometown for the wedding, we got notice that our apt. in NC (where he's stationed) was broken into. Then, while setting up for our rehearsal dinner, we got notice from the State Highway Patrol in NC that my car had been towed. Later we found out that it was stolen when our apt. was broken into along with a digital camera, laptop and external hard drive (containing irreplaceable pictures from my husbands deployment), over 1,000 cd's and dvd's, jewelry, and XBox and PSP. To top it off, on the day of our wedding, it snowed... A LOT. Our guest list of over 300 was cut to around 150. The church felt empty. I was frustrated and felt out of control because of all the issues we could not control out of state. Additionally, my oldest sister, who was my matron of honor, delivered her 4th child 36 hours before the wedding --and still made it to the wedding (in a wheel chair!!) AND our preacher called me by the wrong name at the start of our ceremony. I don't relay any of that for pity and I don't harbor bitterness about it because the most imporant thing is that my husband was there and I was there and we were married. Very few people are going to remember the events of the day and neither of us benefit from being bitter about events that were out of our control. We dated since high school and until he returned home from Iraq, I had seen him 2 times (in 2 week intervals) in the 2 years before, so I was thrilled to be able to see him face to face EVERY DAY and be his wife. Everything else meant nothing compared to that.  He's my best friend, my partner, and no theft, snow storm, or birth can take that away. The wedding day is imporant and there's nothing wrong with planning the fairy tale day, but the problem arises when the desire for the perfect wedding takes precedence over the joy of being married and sharing your life with someone you love and who loves you equally.  Be thankful that you have been blessed enough to experience the joy of marriage.
 
May 19, 2008, 12:38 pm CDT

05/19 Nuptial Nightmares

We had a lot going on around our wedding.   Our wedding date was 6/2/01.  A few months before, my dad went in the hospital for mnor surgery.  Because of many complications and unexpected issues, he was still in the hospital on my wedding day on a ventilator.  My brother had to walk me down the aisle.  After the ceremony, my husband and I went to visit my dad in his hospital room then we would meet up with everyone at the reception.  After a very difficult visit, we went out to our waiting limo.  We pulled out of the hospital parking lot and then the limo stalled.  We were stuck on the side of the road a block from the hospital for over an hour.  A very nice couple stopped to help us and even offered to lend us their BMW to get to our reception.  To make matters worse, our reception was being held on a harbor cruise boat and they only had a small window at the pier to load our guests.  We were just minutes away from missing our own reception.  Thankfully, we did get there in time...but barely.  I thought my wedding day was supposed to be perfect.  But, it wasn't.  I had relatives coming up to me at my reception asking how I could get married with my dad in the hospital.  Well, my repsonse was that it wasn't my decision.  My dad didn't want us to wait and 7 years later, I'm still glad that we did go ahead with our plans.  Six weeks after our wedding, we lost my dad.  I take some comfort in the fact that at least he got to see me on my wedding day and he knew that I was happy.
 
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