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Topic : 05/27 The Dr. Phil House: Brat Camp, Part 3

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Created on : Friday, May 23, 2008, 07:38:19 am
Author : DrPhilBoard1
It’s the last day in The Dr. Phil House for four families struggling to tone down the chaos, fighting and unhappiness. Have you ever wanted to be a fly on the wall and listen to what your kids say about you? Well, the moms get that chance. They watch and listen behind a two-way mirror as their kids have a conversation with one of their peers. Don’t miss Wendy’s reaction when her son, Noah, opens up about his sister’s death. When Dr. Phil puts the kids to the task of cleaning up a filthy room, will the challenge be too much for them … or their parents? Next, Dr. Phil sits down with the mothers and the fathers separately for some no-nonsense parenting advice. If you’re a parent, you won’t want to miss this valuable lesson in parenting! Then, Dr. Phil helps the parents make the first step in creating a phenomenal family. Plus, how are these families doing now? Don’t miss the surprising update! And, are you looking for something fun for your kids this summer? Deborah Gibson has gone from teen pop sensation to an inspiring musical mentor. See how she makes deserving children’s dreams come true at her Camp Electric Youth! Join the discussion.

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May 24, 2008, 10:29 am CDT

Doctor House Part Phil Show Three.

Brat Camp Doctor House Part Phil The Three. Well I Never thought this would end but apanley it did not

end too soon. See you on Tuesday May 27th, 2008. Sincerley Your. Russell Vlaanderen.---------------------

 
May 24, 2008, 1:24 pm CDT

05/27 The Dr. Phil House: Brat Camp, Part 3

 

  I sure wish I could tell this to the ladie whos kids slapped her.

   She had a child that passed away from brain cancer. Man that must have been hard to go through.

   Sometimes the Lord allows things to happen in our lives we will Never understand.But if we turn and seek HIM for the understanding He is faithful to us.I can not understand her pain,but i hope that one day she can think of it this way.That the child she lost is in heaven with Jesus!!! She gets to play and sing and dance with Him.She as no more pain! I know its hard to understand this or look at it that way,I know it would be hard for me to see it that way if i was in her shoes.But i pray that she will see it that way some day soon so that she can stop hurting and start living again.

also so she stops putting her son through hell.

 
May 26, 2008, 7:08 am CDT

Steel Magnolia

Quote From: resgll

 

  I sure wish I could tell this to the ladie whos kids slapped her.

   She had a child that passed away from brain cancer. Man that must have been hard to go through.

   Sometimes the Lord allows things to happen in our lives we will Never understand.But if we turn and seek HIM for the understanding He is faithful to us.I can not understand her pain,but i hope that one day she can think of it this way.That the child she lost is in heaven with Jesus!!! She gets to play and sing and dance with Him.She as no more pain! I know its hard to understand this or look at it that way,I know it would be hard for me to see it that way if i was in her shoes.But i pray that she will see it that way some day soon so that she can stop hurting and start living again.

also so she stops putting her son through hell.

 

      I do understand her pain.   When I was first married, I promised to wait and begin our family when were in our early thirties.  I was 23, and it meant waiting for seven years.  My husband finished his education and had a better job at the newspaper.  He started out as a photographer and sports writer, and he progressed to being managing editor.  

     One night, I woke up convinced I was finally in labor.  Larry had taken the week off as a vacation from work so he could be there.  It was a beautiful night, the first day of May.  I was in a bit of pain.  In the labor room, I was puzzled as to why the nurses were digging with stethoscopes into my side.  And then, I knew.  It was so awful, I promised I wouldn't get upset until my doctor got there.  Larry was blissfully unaware--and only about half awake. 

     My doctor informed me that when "You can find a heartbeat with three stethoscopes and the Doppler, it is because there isn't one."  There is no graceful way to tell a mother that she is in labor, but her child is dead.  I had a full term stillbirth.  The first thing I ever did as a parent was sign my child's death certificate.  He was a handsome little 8 pound boy.  I named him Charles Laurence, after both his grandfathers. 

      And, my heart broke.

      I was deeply angry that God did not allow me to die, too.  I knew that Charlie was in heaven, but I sure wasn't.  Six weeks later, my pap smear results returned, "suspicious, probably malignant."  While awaiting my second biopsy to see if I would be having a hysterectomy that summer, I tried killing myself.  True, I wasn't being rational.  And, I didn't take nearly enough pills.

      Living after your heart has broken isn't as simple as "thinking positive thoughts."  I was in no mood to be cheered by my husband or my family or my friends.  I had a major depressive illness, and it was gonna be a life sentence.  True, the surgery and medication helped slow my cervical cancer. 

      The following summer, I became pregnant again. 

      I was worried sick.  I felt as if the roof had fallen in on me.  And, I strongly suspected it would happen, again.  I wasn't convinced that my second baby would live.  I found the only defense to my predicament:  I would not  love my baby.  If that's what it took to keep Jesus from taking my second baby to heaven with him, I wouldn't love my baby.  

       I had learned from watching Star Trek that people are not logical!!!  No one is capable of feeling, logically.  If you say how you feel about something, it is going to sound silly.  I did not care that my best girlfriend stared at me in disbelief.  My sister explained the Christian viewpoint, several times.  I was in no mood for listening.  

       I was a Steel Magnolia, and I didn't know it.     

 

                                           

     

        

 
May 26, 2008, 11:16 pm CDT

Steel Magnolia's

Quote From: derevna33

 

      I do understand her pain.   When I was first married, I promised to wait and begin our family when were in our early thirties.  I was 23, and it meant waiting for seven years.  My husband finished his education and had a better job at the newspaper.  He started out as a photographer and sports writer, and he progressed to being managing editor.  

     One night, I woke up convinced I was finally in labor.  Larry had taken the week off as a vacation from work so he could be there.  It was a beautiful night, the first day of May.  I was in a bit of pain.  In the labor room, I was puzzled as to why the nurses were digging with stethoscopes into my side.  And then, I knew.  It was so awful, I promised I wouldn't get upset until my doctor got there.  Larry was blissfully unaware--and only about half awake. 

     My doctor informed me that when "You can find a heartbeat with three stethoscopes and the Doppler, it is because there isn't one."  There is no graceful way to tell a mother that she is in labor, but her child is dead.  I had a full term stillbirth.  The first thing I ever did as a parent was sign my child's death certificate.  He was a handsome little 8 pound boy.  I named him Charles Laurence, after both his grandfathers. 

      And, my heart broke.

      I was deeply angry that God did not allow me to die, too.  I knew that Charlie was in heaven, but I sure wasn't.  Six weeks later, my pap smear results returned, "suspicious, probably malignant."  While awaiting my second biopsy to see if I would be having a hysterectomy that summer, I tried killing myself.  True, I wasn't being rational.  And, I didn't take nearly enough pills.

      Living after your heart has broken isn't as simple as "thinking positive thoughts."  I was in no mood to be cheered by my husband or my family or my friends.  I had a major depressive illness, and it was gonna be a life sentence.  True, the surgery and medication helped slow my cervical cancer. 

      The following summer, I became pregnant again. 

      I was worried sick.  I felt as if the roof had fallen in on me.  And, I strongly suspected it would happen, again.  I wasn't convinced that my second baby would live.  I found the only defense to my predicament:  I would not  love my baby.  If that's what it took to keep Jesus from taking my second baby to heaven with him, I wouldn't love my baby.  

       I had learned from watching Star Trek that people are not logical!!!  No one is capable of feeling, logically.  If you say how you feel about something, it is going to sound silly.  I did not care that my best girlfriend stared at me in disbelief.  My sister explained the Christian viewpoint, several times.  I was in no mood for listening.  

       I was a Steel Magnolia, and I didn't know it.     

 

                                           

     

        

When i saw the title Steel Magnolias I nearly lost it, then I really lost it when I kept reading.   In the couple years that I've been posting/reading posts on Dr. Phil's boards I have yet had any post to completely break my heart in two, until this one.  Your story truly brought tears to my eyes.  I, in no possible way can sympathize with you or the mother who lost her daughter to brain cancer, but my heart goes out to both.  If you don't mind me asking, how did your second pregnancy turn out?  And the cancer?

 

My mom suffered two seperate mis-carrages between my sister and I.  She wasn't far enough along to determine eithers gender.  To this day she talks about them and says she'll get to see her angels in heaven one day. I'm kinda curious what they would have looked like too. 

 

 

 

 
May 27, 2008, 12:12 am CDT

Wendy and Noah

I'm  only 17 minutes into the show and can't believe what I'm seeing.  For the mother who's son slapped her in the face.  I'm so sorry for the loss of your daughter.  I can't even begin to sypathize because i've never had that happen.  But I was slightly disturbed by the way you treated your son in the part where you were going to get out of time out. The part that really caught my attention was when you told him, "KEEP YOUR MOUTH CLOSED AND TALK TO ME LIKE AN ADULT!"  Okay, first of all that statement is totally contradictory and second, he's a child, how can you expect him to behave like an adult?  That's like asking the government to make gas 1.50 per gallon, it's impossible.  Just out of curiosity, (and I'm not tryinng to tell you hpw to raise your son, I'm just throwing some suggestions your way) but do you look for and praise any of his accomplishements or hug him and reassure him that you love him with all your heart?  Maybe he's going thru some tough times losing his sister too.  Even though he showed no emotion doesn't mean he's not hurting.  I am the type of person that does not show my emotions in public.  He's trying to tell you somethng but you refuse to listen and understand! Try listening!  He told you  that you're messing up his life by the way you treat him and you snapped at him, then started yelling again. Talk to him and let him know that his feelings matter.  I tend to butt head with my 15 year old niece who is 12 years younger than me.  So many times I find myself losing my cool and yelling at her but the few times I took a deep breath and rationally talked things thru I got a lot farther and I fellt better about myself.  I hope you don't take this post as an insult, that's not how I intended to come across.  I just want to share some possible solutions.  Hope all work out.
 
May 27, 2008, 5:22 am CDT

05/27 The Dr. Phil House: Brat Camp, Part 3

Time to put their BRATS back in the cages and take them home, for Noah and Ethan they might want to get ues to those bars!!!!!!! and for the rest of the kids parents i hope you heard what the kids where saying and help them get  their needs meet, haley seem like a great kid, still understanding all that life gives you, to the oldest boy he just needs time with his dad, the little girl she needs to learn to be the victor rather then the victim all the time, Sports would be good!!!Ethan, well he needs way more then a hug or two, he needs to see a shrink!!!! and i hope he does to help with what ever is causing his troubles. Noah needs to be brought down a notch or two, and to understand he can't control every thing and everyone, good luck with that!!!!!
 
May 27, 2008, 5:44 am CDT

05/27 The Dr. Phil House: Brat Camp, Part 3

What would of the Doc done after he jerk Noah off the chair, after he smacked his mother?????

WHAT do you do??? time out and a good talking to does not fit with that statement!!!!   ?????

 
May 27, 2008, 7:07 am CDT

Dr. Phil got played.

Ethan and Noah sure got over on Dr. Phil. Did Ethan say more than 10 words on the show? And Noah is a little drama queen who needs a serious beat down before he gets too big.
 
May 27, 2008, 7:18 am CDT

05/27 The Dr. Phil House: Brat Camp, Part 3

Quote From: shelly_80

When i saw the title Steel Magnolias I nearly lost it, then I really lost it when I kept reading.   In the couple years that I've been posting/reading posts on Dr. Phil's boards I have yet had any post to completely break my heart in two, until this one.  Your story truly brought tears to my eyes.  I, in no possible way can sympathize with you or the mother who lost her daughter to brain cancer, but my heart goes out to both.  If you don't mind me asking, how did your second pregnancy turn out?  And the cancer?

 

My mom suffered two seperate mis-carrages between my sister and I.  She wasn't far enough along to determine eithers gender.  To this day she talks about them and says she'll get to see her angels in heaven one day. I'm kinda curious what they would have looked like too. 

 

 

 

  Yesterday was Memorial Day.  I confess, I always think of Charlie on Memorial Day. 

   My second pregnancy brought my daughter, Lauren into the world.  I had troubles near the end, and she had something called fetal growth retardation.  It means that I carried Lauren for 39 weeks, but she stopped developing at week 31.  She weighed 5 pounds and one precious ounce.  That ounce meant she could be delivered at the normal hospital.  Any less, she would have been delivered at a neonatal unit.

    I hold the hospital's record for not asking whether the child was a boy or a girl.  Parents usually inquire this before the baby is completely delivered.  I lay back with a comfortable C-section listening to that pleasant little voice, mewing away.  Finally, they cleaned the baby up.  The doctor said, "I don't believe it.  I have never had a patient not ask if it was a boy or a girl.  Do you want to know?" 

   I looked at my husband, he looked at me and he said, "I guess so."

   We wished Lauren her first "Happy Birthday."  I remember plainly the moment when I dared love her.  Two weeks later, I brought her home from the hospital to her nursery.  As I walked down the hall toward it,

 the weight of the world fell off my shoulders.  I had my baby, and I got to go home and be her momma!

   I had a miscarriage the following year.  I bled excessively, and I had a D&C.  The worst thing about cervical cancer is that pregnancy speeds up the cancer.  And, then  it masks the problem.  Instead of having distinct symptoms, I was told I had "false labor."  I was only imagining the problem, and I would be sent home.

    Two years after Lauren, I had my son James.  He is the exact image of his brother, Charlie.  Six months later, I had a hysterectomy.  The cancer kicked in big time. 

     

           

   

 
May 27, 2008, 8:51 am CDT

Agree with "got played"

Quote From: littlenicky

Ethan and Noah sure got over on Dr. Phil. Did Ethan say more than 10 words on the show? And Noah is a little drama queen who needs a serious beat down before he gets too big.
 I have to agree with this post, even though I almost always agree with Dr. Phil.  I felt maybe Ethan had some deeper psychological (mental?) issues going on.  Noah seemed incapable of seeing his roll in the chaos - losing a sister to cancer can set your emotional growth back a bit, but I didn't feel there was ever an "aha" moment for him.  I hope both of these young men have mental health resources available to them in their home towns.
 
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