Topic : 07/07 Adult Sibling Rivalry

They only have the power to make you feel that way if you let them. You pick your friends you don't pick your family and you don't have to love and or respect someone just because they are related to you. As sad as it may seem there are a lot of families that are not good to one another. Be good to yourself and let the rest go live your life in a loving and positive way and rise about it. 

I am sorry for your loss-She murdered your doll-LOL I never had a sister but I wish I did yours sounds wonderful

   I really do understand where you are coming from i have 3 siblings 1 sister,2 brother's and i to took care of both of my parents!! My Dad was my best friend & when he got sick none of them helped @ all just myself & my husband i have not spoken to my so called Brothers since Dad passed almost 2 years now but believe me they wanted what they felt was there's when he did pass i just gave them whatever. Now my sister & i were close until about a month ago when all of a sudden she decided that i was not doing her right??? & I still can not understand that to this day??? She has not & will not speak to me & the last time we did speak she just said nasty & hateful things to me. I just wanted to let you know you are not alone.

I am the oldest of 6 children. When my mother died, my sister took control of all of the funeral arrangements, and the day after my mom was buried my dad couldn't find a spatula to make eggs because she'd  "cleaned" the house. Or should I say "cleaned out" the house. Then she proceeded to "handle" his financial affairs. She & her husband moved into the house (it was a duplex), got him to put the house into their name.....with the excuse that none of the other kids could afford the upkeep. When the house was in their names, she moved into her mother & father in laws' home saying it was because my dad wouldn't quit drinking.

When my father died, she got his entire estate (not that it was a TON of money), and his pension was split between the 6 of us. It amounted to about $1200 each......she got his life insurance policies and military death benefits.

The entire family was upset because my dad told all of us that even though she had the house, we'd get $1000 when he died because he & my mom had paid $5000 for the house when they bought it. When the will was presented, the amount was $100! It turned out that while she was living in my dad's house she'd obtained power of attorney over all of his decisions.

The entire family started to investigate the circumstances of the will & she didn't want anyone to know how much she'd really gained from my dad's death.....so she told my brother she would give him the house. End of investigation.

My youngest brother & his wife moved in,because the brother that owned the house was in the Army; they   paid the tax money into a bank account.....and it seemed like the bank account was considered the family bank account......with my brother that "owned" the house using it as his personal MAC machine!

THEN my brother & his wife had a child that died from SIDS. My sister called every agency that she could possibly think of to have them declared unfit parents. They were on the local news... because of the condition of the house; they  had to sue the police department for violating their rights & they won....and it was all because she resented having to give up the house in the first place...

Anyway, she ended up getting divorced from her husband, he got custody of their daughter, she moved in with another sister, went bankrupt, and died of COPD two years ago.

This is a true story. After her death, we found out that she'd actually received more than $50,000 from my dad's insurance policies; and she'd met up with a scam artist that completely wiped out HER bank accounts.....she doctor shopped to get medications, she was on 20 different meds a day....but her death shocked the entire family. Even though we didn't like her, she was our sister & we loved her.

I had five other siblings I grew up with, I peed in their beds, I stole their pants, I toilet papered their bathrooms, I sat on their boyfriends laps, I snitched on them, I broke their electronics, and pissed them off tremendously by lying to them, . Now that our parents have passed and we are all grown, I am the only common denominator of all of them.

Silly huh?

Rule #1 We can Love your family until the day we die, but we don't have to like them. Tolrance is a wonderful thing. 

2#  we can't pick our relatives but we must pick our friends.

My mother just passed away this past June and my ex-sister was her caretaker....as her caretaker for the past several years, she alienated most of the family, to the point no one wanted to come and visit. Changed the locks on all the doors (all of us at one time had keys to the house), would scream as soon as you walked in the door, to the point our mother would bow her head and cry. My mother would say how much she was afraid of her, when she wasn't in the room, but was to afraid to tell her caseworker and we were told unless she spoke up, there was nothing that could be done.  

Now that my mother is gone....she loaded up my mothers car (with the most valuable items) and left the day of the funeral in her (my mothers) car....I was told that my mother signed the car over to her (my mother had dementia), so I could almost bet, the signed paper in a court of law, wouldn't be legal. But it's not worth the fight.

My mother is now in a better place and not being mistreated or no longer afraid. I just wished there had been more that we could of done to protect and help her.

I will never forgive her (the ex-sister). She can rot in hell...if she was on fire, I would not cross the street to piss on her to put out the fire.