Topic : 07/15 Is There a Predator in the House?

 READ THIS TAX PAYERS;

 False Abuse Accusations Cost Taxpayers $20 Billion,
Report Finds

July 14, 2008
Contact: Mark Rosenthal, 781-956-1034,
info@mediaradar.org
<mailto:info@mediaradar.org?subject=Press%20Release%20Inquiry:%20Domestic%20Violence%20Laws%20Require%20Reform,%20Groups%20Say>

WASHINGTON - Divorce lawyers acknowledge persons often
make allegations of abuse in order to gain a legal edge.
A report released today shows such claims are
widespread, harmful to the children involved in such
cases, devastating to persons falsely accused, and
costly to the American taxpayer.

The report, "False Allegations of Domestic Violence Cost
Taxpayers $20 Billion a Year," compiles government
statistics and research studies to reach three conclusions:

1. Each year our nation spends $4 billion for
domestic violence programs.
2. Each year about 175,000 children are involved in a
divorce with a false allegation of domestic violence.
3. These claims contribute to $20 billion in public
costs and taxpayer burden associated with
single-parent families.

The report is published by RADAR - Respecting Accuracy
in Domestic Abuse Reporting - and is available at:
www.mediaradar.org/docs/RADARreport-False-DV-Allegations-Cost-20-Billion.pdf
<http://www.mediaradar.org/docs/RADARreport-False-DV-Allegations-Cost-20-Billion.pdf>

Children are often harmed by false claims. Attorney Lisa
Scott of Bellvue, Wash. notes, "The ones hurt most of
all are the children kept away from a loving parent."

The report highlights the recent case of Emily Hindle
whose mother falsely accused the father of domestic
violence in order to abduct the child. The mother later
discontinued the child's medical treatment, causing the
child to lose her sight in one eye.

"False allegations of abuse are currently the greatest
violation of due process in our legal system," reveals
family attorney Gregory Hession of Springfield, Mass.
"In my practice, I've found the majority of the
allegations used to obtain restraining orders are false
or greatly exaggerated."

Victims of false allegations are beginning to fight
back. Former state Rep. Eric Major won a $500,000 award
against the city of Birmingham, Ala., stemming from his
2004 arrest and subsequent acquittal on charges that he
attacked his ex-fiancee.

False allegations often arise from programs funded by
the Violence Against Women Act. RADAR recently launched
a Fix VAWA Now! campaign to increase awareness of the
need to reform ineffective and harmful domestic violence
laws.

R.A.D.A.R. - Respecting Accuracy in Domestic Abuse
Reporting - is a non-profit, non-partisan organization
of men and women working to improve the effectiveness of
our nation's approach to solving domestic violence.
http://www.mediaradar.org .

--

Barbara C. Johnson, Advocate of Court Reform and Attorney at Law
6 Appletree Lane
Andover, MA 01810-4102
978-474-0833

barbaracjohnson@verizon.net
False Allegations: http://www.falseallegations.com

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-----
The judicial system is very broken. It must be fixed.
There are four people who can do the job:
Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody.
Everybody thinks Somebody will surely do it.
It is a job Anybody can do. But Nobody is doing it.
At least I'm trying. What are you doing?

It is dangerous to be right

when the government is wrong.

-- VOLTAIRE

All truth passes through three stages.
First, it is ridiculed.
Second, it is violently opposed.
Third, it is accepted as being self-evident.
-- ARTHUR SCHOPENHAUER (1788-1860)

[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

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Dr. Phil, you are doing a great job advocating for kids, especially this summer! I am a rape crisis advocate and I will tell you that 99% of the time, people do not lie about being sexually abused. The process that a child or adult, male or female goes through after an initial outcry is painful enough for the survivor. From the the first "outcry" to the end of the legal process, the entire experience is incredibly invasive. Few children are sadistic enough to make claims of sexual abuse. In Texas, we have to believe the "outcry" no matter what our own suspicions are. The statistics are alarming as most pedophiles are smart enough not to leave evidence so it is very hard to prosecute them. Most sex offenders are not strangers and almost all of the time someone who already knows the child. Most often it IS a step-parent or boyfriend of the mother or someone who takes too much interest in the child. WE MUST BELIEVE EVERY OUTCRY, NOT ONLY TO PROTECT OUR OWN, BUT TO PROTECT OTHERS IN THIS WORLD. SEXUAL ABUSE CAN TAKE A LIFETIME TO HEAL FROM. DR. PHIL IS RIGHT, OUR CHILDREN OUR INCREDIBLY VULNERABLE. FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO HAVE NOT RECOVERED OR EVEN CRIED OUT TO ANYONE, KNOW THERE IS healing for you and it is never time to search for that healing. IT WAS NOT YOUR FAULT AS IT WAS NOT MY FAULT.   www.rapecrisis.com Be not afraid, God is with you.

After just watching this show, I must sat that I am angry and confused. I am confused about the first segment. The registered sex offender that is living in a home with a child that is under age 12. How is this even possible? What state allows for this to even be possible? I am a resident of Georgia, and Georgia law does not allow this. I really feel like the mother's boyfriend is a violent man. I hate to pass judgment, but did anyone else see that evil look in his eyes? And the way he put on for those cameras? Come on people, there's something not right there. I applaud the grandmother for noticing changes in her grandson. I hope and pray that this mother wakes up, and quit moving men in after only knowing them for a month. Has she not seen the news lately? Men and women are killing their own children today. Why would you allow a stranger to pump fear in your son? Please, Wake up.

And about the mother that choose a man over her own child, What is wrong with you? I am glad that you woke up. Although it is very sad that it took you three or four months. Put that man out. Get your child back home. A man can be replaced. A child cannot.

Speaking as a  loyal Tax Payer, and a parent, I must say that I do not care how much h it cost me for a Sexual Predator to be found out for who they are. Male or Female. I am 27 years old, and have been working and paying taxes since I was 16. Please understand that I am in mo way advocating for anyone to be wrongfully accused or sentenced. But investigate.... As a taxpayer, I pay for a lot of things that Maybe I shouldn't. Like welfare.. But, thats the way of  Land of the Free, and The Home of  The Brave, right?

Scott is NOT a pedophile!  I tuned into the show thinking who the hell lets a sex offender live with a child?  After hearing Scott's situation, and Dr. Phil verifying his story as being the truth, I saw things differently.  A drunken night with a dumb 20 year old who didn't demand I.D. from the 14 year old does not make for a pedophile. 

Donna has problems.  I'm sorry that she was molested.  I'm sorry that her trauma was in all likihood, the reason she married an abusive husband and left her children to live with him.  It is NOT an excuse to become the "caped crusader" against her daughter, whom she'd now like to control, or to be a "mother" to her grandson. 

Dominic goes to daycare.  The influences at that center are as strong, if not stronger than the family ties.  In daycare, disclipline is set by the caretakers, not the Mother, Father or Grandparents.  I'm sure the center put pressure on the potty training issue. 

Scott moving into the home was a big adjustment for Dominic.  It would not be my choice to have a live-in boyfriend with a child present.  That's only me, and my values...People can live as they see fit.  I agree that video was ridiculous!  Only thing being, 3 year old children do NOT pander to the camera.  Dominic looked fine to me, as he obviously did to the multiple caseworkers who were called into that home.  Maybe the cause of some of his problems...TENSION!   3 year olds do have tantrums and behave quite differently as they grow.  Grandma, Dominic is not abnormal, he's getting older and testing the waters....all children do that at that age.  It gets worse before it gets better.  You may not know this, as you left your children at young ages.  Maybe had you stayed, you'd know...you really think the "disussion" you had with your daughter who was then, 4 really  clarified why Mommy left?  That statement ALONE tells that you are not tuned into the minds of young children.

Donna, go into therapy.  My children were abused, I am hypervigilant, but I'm aware of it.  I still see my therapist for a "tune-up", so I can stay grounded.  I suggest that you do the same before you lose your daughter and your grandson forever.  I would be afraid to allow you near my child, as you are too wrapped up in your own webs.  Causing stress of investigations, invasive of peoples' homes is not being responsible, it is being cruel.  It was obvious that your other family members did NOT sit with you in support.  I don't believe a word you said.  Your daughter is young, she's being challenged by you at every turn.  Young and dumb, she put on a good show for the video...I cannot blame her.  You have crossed a line, you will not listen to anyone, and Dr. Phil made very good points in dealing with you.  Only thing he left unaddressed was the day care...how many hours a day is Dominic there?  How many hours per day?   I have seen children in random play put hands over other kids' mouths, in fact, they do all kinds of things that kids do...Dominic  is there...so, when in Rome... Don't be so quick to rule that out.

The next story was tragic.  Meryl's husband beat the machine, no charges were filed against him.  Still, professionals believe that girl had been molested.  I applaud Dr. Phil for stressing the professional criteria that is used, not revealing it to facillitate false reporting.  I know what the criteria is...my therapist told me after he said he'd lay his license on the line that my children were truly molested.  They had sessions with him for a month before all of it came out.  We did not recieve justice, yet I KNOW the accused was/is guilty.  He's been gone since the first statement was uttered, and no, he was not my husband...he was my daughter's...they have 2 children now...8 years of estrangement and I have never seen my daughter, HIM, or their children, since I believed my own.  Do I have reason to believe that my grandchildren are in danger?  According to statistics, I do.  Can I do anything about it?  Absolutely not!  

Meryl, if I were you, I'd take Dr. Phi's advice,  apologize to your daughter, beg her to forgive you.  Toss the results of that lie detecter out along with your husband...he's probably a sociopath, and they can beat a machine, as they have no conscience.  Truth and lies are no different.  They believe their own lies, so the machine is not a big deal to them   There are reasons the lie detectors are not admissable in court....do not let a machine take away your daughter's words, or the opinions of professionals.  You were brave enough to go on National T.V. to admit you were wrong.  Get your daughter home, him out, and both of you get into serious counselling.  You heard something everyone dreads...you faced up to your mistake.  Good luck to both you and your daughter!

Sexual abuse of a child is one of the most damaging crimes, and is often the hardest to prove, especially when it is revealed years later without witnesses, or other independent evidence.  BELIEVE THE CHILDREN!   Take one look at Donna...she is NOT over it..she was not over it when she left her family...it isn't her fault, yet the cycle of abuse is still active in her life.  Sexual abuse is a poisen, it takes a great amount of treatment.  Please parents, listen to your children...if your error on the side of caution, it's a lot easier to apologize to an adult than it is to a victim. 

My family suffered tremendously because of it, but the end result in having two healthy children was worth it.  I had my ups, downs, mixed emotions...try choosing between your children, yet I'm not sorry I sided with the younger ones. 

I did all that the law would permit to help the oldest...she is and was an adult at the time of the disclosure.  Now, I can only pray that her children are safe...what I think does not matter.  I hope she watched today's show, but I doubt that she would....too intense for those in denial.  Dr. Phil, I think this show was one of the better ones on child abuse, and you did, in my opinion, a geat service to the guests and to your audience.

I am a 43yr old mother of 5 children and my youngest son fell prey to a sexual predator which was his teacher. This teacher had everyone fooled into believing he was the greatest person on earth. I never figured out what was going on until it was almost too late. My son was molested for approx. 2 years while he was in middle school. Me and my husband noticed alot of changes in our son but we contributed some of these changes to puberty,which was a huge mistake. We were the parents that was at every school function,coached sports,involved in all our childrens lives.I never once thought about child molestation until the state police contacted me and told me my sons name came up in an investigation for this teacher and then everything clicked together and I knew it was true even before I asked my son.

I have a hard time forgiving myself for missing every sign that my son was putting out there and I was not able to pick up on. I wish this mother could have been with us throughout the ordeal and she would definitely believe her daughter. the details of my sons situations was brought out in court and he had to relive all of this in front of this predator or pedophile. These people are everywhere,in your schools,your homes,your churches just waiting for children to  prey upon.

I guess the only reason I can look at myself and go on is because when it did come out I surely supported  my son and made sure he knew how sorry I was and that he was not the blame for anything. This has really changed our lives and I wouldn't wish this even on my worst enemy.

Maybe there should be a show for young men and women whom have been groomed so they can put a reality to this situation,because sometimes people watch shows and grasp things easier than if they have to read about things. I was surely naive about all of this and I wish I had seen a Dr.Phil episode to maybe give me the warning signs before it was too late,Because one thing for sure no matter how good you think someone is in your childs life ,they could be the predator.

Dr.Phil I love the way you get down to the point and help confused guest see facts, opions, and stupidity. Love your line of work because, I had a cousin who was being sexually abused by her grandfather and, she was lashing out at her mother by lying and fighting because she felt that her mother knew and wasn't protecting her. She is now in a home for 6 months so she can get some help. Clearly that mother that  was on the show was confused and will have to answer to God by not believing her child. But I do understand that it's a two way street, and it was hard for her to believe her daughter and husband but, she should have made him get out of the home until she got some clear answers. You put no one before your child and I think know she knows that. So I'm in the 84% of people who should believe there child. Great work Dr.Phil you keep on showing guest the light thats why your show is so succesful and people keep coming ton you for answers.