Topic : 09/12 The N-Word Debate

I grew up in the segregated South, when blacks and white had different entrances into department stores, movie balconies, different bathrooms and water fountains.  Through CHOOSING to love and be friends to peoples of different colors, I have made a difference.  I have had sleepover parties with peoples of different ethniticity, black, hispanic , indian and asian.  I have had best friends of different races.  I am white.

My father has been accused of being 'racist' because he has a picture of blacks picking cotton in a cotton field.  People don't know that it is a childhood memory for my father, as he was the white child walking behind the black field worker, PICKING COTTON WITH HIM TO EARN SOME MONEY!!!  People love to 'assume.'

My family came from Sweden and England.  We were poor and through education and sheer hard work, have made our livings.  We did not have nor own slaves in our family history.

My point is this: we all have had struggles throughout life and some have had harder struggles.  My faith in God and His continued help in changing my heart, I hope, have made me a better person.  Could it be possible that if we ALL would stop calling each other names and become AMERICANS, that we could learn to love and appreciate each other?

The history of the word is varied, but if you look at most dictionaries it says "a person with black or dark skin."  I don't think people should be offended by this word because it came from hispanics, it's just a variation of the word negro meaning black.  If the south made it a derogatory term, take it back and own it, say "yes, thank you, I have black skin, do you have a problem with that?"  Then educate them on what the word really means. The word never meant "stupid person" like some dictionaries have printed.  Negro means black.  The key is, don't get offended, be proud of who you are.  I don't agree that the word should be banned.  Words only hurt if you let them.  America was founded on freedom of speech, you can't take that away.  I'm not saying I like derogatory words, but people get angry and say stupid things.  The N word is not the only bad word out there, if we ban that word we'd have to ban all the other bad words.  Banning that word doesn't mean people won't make up some other word to call you.

Do tell , what is an African American ?

There needs to be alot more discussions.....lots.

How many white people really do socialize with blacks, besides

work or school ?

At my former employment, I worked along side a lovely black woman.

We were the same age, 50'ish. We were having a conversation, and

for some reason 'kool-aid' got brought up. She looked at me and said,

"I didn't know white people drank Kool-aid".....I laugh to this day when I

think about that. I only stay in touch with her threw letters now, as I moved

from that town.

I want everyone, young and old, black and white, and all people in between to study history like they study the tabloids.  I'm sorry if this angers some of you, but black people were not the only people in American history or any other history to be treated badly, to be enslaved, to be taken away from their homes, to be shunned or denied things or been victims of violence because of their skin color or national origin.  Shall we talk about the plight of Jewish people throughout history?  How about what has been going on in the Middle East for HUNDREDS of years?  Ever hear about how Irish immigrants were treated when they came to America?  I am Irish, my ancestors came over on boats and were immediately taken to rich people's homes and put into slavery.  They were not allowed to drink out of water fountains, use restrooms or enter certain establishments because they were Irish.  I grew up in Hawaii where being fair skinned and having blonde hair was NOT fun!  I was beat up, and I mean, I had the crap kicked out of me.... for the first time when I was 11 years old because a Hawaiian girl thought that I was looking at her funny.  They have a word for caucasions out there.... it's "Haole".  It's the "N" word equivilent out there.  But, I let it make me stronger, not bitter.  I don't feel like anyone is "owed" anything based on what happened to our ancestors!  That notion is completely rediculous!  And, let's talk about things like "black entertainment television", "black starz", "black history month".  These things are not considered racist..... if there were a "white entertainment television", "white starz", or a "white history month"... there would be an uproar.  It would be linked to the KKK, there would be tens of thousands of black people protesting outside television networks, outside state and federal offices.  You know what?  Slavery sucked!  It was wrong, there was no excuse for it..... but if it didn't happend DIRECTLY to you..... NOBODY OWES YOU ANYTHING!!!!!!!  If ya'll want to call eachother by the "n" word and sound ignorant... by all means.... go right ahead.  Why don't you look up the definition of the word first though so that you have a full understanding of what you are calling your friends. 

It seems like everytime this discussion comes up there is someone talking about how white people don't understand.  I would love to know exactly what it is that we white people don't understand.  I grew up in a very, very poor family with a single-mom.  We lived in a predominantly black neighborhood and were constantly looked down upon, talked about, and made to feel that we were utterly inferior.  This is also the way that the majority of our family treated us b/c my mom didn't have a lot of money, but she did the best she could.  I now live in a community where my part of town is also considered to be primarily black.  My husband went to a historically black high school and now when I tell people where he went to school they look down on me.  I have had many black women look at me and treat me as if I was scum because they assume that my husband is black (they have actually told me this).  I know what it is like to be ridiculed and looked down upon and I know what it is like to live daily being discriminated against.

Based on that information, does it give me the right to use the N word?  I don't think so.  I also don't believe that based on what happened to a group of people so long ago gives them the right to use that word.  Black people today have not experienced slavery, their ancestors did.  I have experienced racism, but don't consider myself to be any different from anyone else because of it.  I always grew up with no recollection of race being anything important or feeling a certain way about anyone that may have looked different than me.  It is only now, as I have moved into this type of society where race is very recognized that I start to even realize that the things that happened to me growing up were because I was white.

Is there something else I don't understand?  Some reason that the N word is okay for some to use but not others (given that the reasoning is the same -- like the white lady that said she would use it in reference to her husband)?

I would really love to get some responses on this to help me understand more.  I also have to agree with the people that have talked about us all being american's.  Regardless of color we are all American's.  If you want to embrace your heritage, there is no problem doing that but you don't have to do it by deliniating yourself from other people (i. e. saying you are african-american instead of just american).  My ancestors are Irish and I am proud of that fact, but I don't call myself irish-american b/c that is history in my family...I was born and raised here in America.