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Topic : 12/22 Parents Falsely Accused

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Created on : Friday, September 12, 2008, 01:20:40 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 09/18/08) Could you be guilty of abusing your child and not know it? Where are the boundaries when it comes to parenting? Treffly is a mom of three who never thought she would be accused of breaking the law. But that's exactly what happened when she left her daughter in the car to do an errand just 30 feet away. Treffly's case sparked a flurry of opinions and heated debates across the country. People in the community and a criminal defense attorney weigh in. And find out what Dr. Phil thinks about Treffly's encounter with the law. Then, Lynn says her biggest regret is leaving her daughter alone the night the 13-year-old died. Find out how a false allegation landed her behind bars. Her conviction was overturned, and Lynn became the first woman in U.S. history to be cleared by DNA evidence. Hear how the truth came to light and what life has been like since she was released from prison. And, hear about Lynn's son, Ed's, experience growing up in foster care as a result of his mother's incarceration. What can mother and son do to rebuild their bond? Find out what you can do to improve the lives of children in the foster care system. Plus, don't miss the steps you need to take if you're wrongly accused of a crime. Join the discussion.

Find out what happened on the show.

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December 22, 2008, 4:38 pm CST

Get a grip

The people who are jumping up and down accusing that woman of a crime are like rabid dogs.  They act so high and mighty and they throw down their judgment.  I see NOTHING wrong with leaving your kids in the car if you are only 30 feet away!!  Get a grip!!  And the woman on the video who said she would take her kid out of the car to put a letter in a mailbox that was at the bumper of her car - does she have her kids on leash all day long so they are NEVER out of her sight?  The world isn't perfect and growing up is learning how to navigate the world.  Being left in a car while someone runs to the mailbox or into the pizza shop, or returning your shopping cart is ok.  It's only the high profile people who leave babies in hot cars for hours on end who should be thrown in jail, or even under the jail.  Be reasonable!  Even Dr Phil eluded to the fact that he would like to say that the woman who was arrested for being 30ft away was wrongly accused, but he couldn't because people are stupid and he has to watch what he says.

The poor woman who was jailed for nothing.. beaten up, threatened and harassed... I feel so sorry for you and your kids.  I'm sending you and your family virtual hugs!  The "system" is so messed up it isn't even funny.  Arresting one woman for being 30 feet away from her kid and jailing another woman for doing nothing is so wrong, when the foster kids are being left to rot in abusive situations.

My question is:  Have any of the people here who are so adamant about child abuse, like leaving your kid in your own car while you walk to the mailbox, ever done anything to stop the abuse of children in foster care?   So many foster parents only want the money and they hate the kids.  Do they jump up and down and run around shooting at houses and throwing in smoke bombs?  NO!  They latch onto one thing that makes them look "politically correct" and like they are "good parents" without even thinking about what is reasonable or not.

Maybe the people who are so judgmental should become foster parents and then they would be good and correct parents/citizens.
 
 
December 22, 2008, 4:41 pm CST

not likely

Quote From: feistyd

Wrong!! We ALL don't do it!

 

Do I think they went too far- yeah. They could have just written a ticket and released her. Ask any parent who has had something bad to their child- they all thought it would never happen them.

 

The fact that her older children wanted to donate is admirable, but it could have waited...

 

I don't believe this incident makes her a bad parent, just a parent who made a bad decision (although she did mention that she does this in quite a few situations)

I have three kids and I have almost lost them at one point in thier short lifes, and I have lost an unborn child. So as far as asking any parent I am one of those parents but I still feel she didn't do anything wrong and people like you make it harder to be a parent. NO ONE can say they have never left thier kids in the car. You can't tell me when you pump gas in the rain you take your little one out of the car seat and hold them while you pump gas then go pay. Sorry not likely.
 
December 22, 2008, 4:47 pm CST

12/22 Parents Falsely Accused

Glad the charges against the first woman were dropped (they obviously saw how ridiculous they were in the first place or she would have been convicted).  I had a situation many years ago.  My middle son was 7 at the time (25 now) and he wriggled out of my hand as we exited a strip mall, I of course ran after him and saw a car...I grabbed the collar of his shirt because it was the only place I could grab and yanked him back just before he stepped out in front of the speeding car (easily 25 or 30 mph in a 10mph zone).  I was beside myself with fear and hugged him then turned him around and scolded him and told him he ALWAYS holds mommys hand and never runs from mommy when cars are around, which he understood quite well by what he told my parents had happened in the street.  That night our local sheriff showed up with a warrant to search my sons body for marks on an allegation of abuse (LOLOLOL).  He was soooo apologetic about having to be there to do his job, to which I replied that it was ok and I understood he was doing his job, and we both sat Ian down and told him what deputy Thom was going to do (strip to his underwear and answer a couple questions) so he wouldn't be traumatized in any way (no prob there as all my kids ran around in their drawers unless we went out).  I guess I'm really just extolling Thom's virtue as an officer for being so understanding and not jumping to conclusions before getting my side of things, he was wonderful.  Thing is, I was never worried what someone else thought of my disciplinary actions of my children, still don't.  The punishment fit the crime so to speak and spanking was needed very infrequently because we always talked about why they would be spanked and why it would be forgotten after.  My kids grew into fine citizens and parents themselves, so I couldn't be prouder.
 
December 22, 2008, 4:55 pm CST

12/22 Parents Falsely Accused

Quote From: florez50diaz

I am a big fan of Dr. Phil and like he said in today's show "Parents Wrongly Accused" that he has to be careful of what he says because people respect his word.  Well you screwed up Phil!

 

 I am so disappointed with Dr Phil  when he said that he finds no wrong doing of the parent who left their child in a car 30 feet away even if they have a good view of them.  Of course his audience is going to clap, give me a break they are on his show!!!!  Hurray for those women who stood up and disagreed with him.  It only takes a second for something to happen like a bad driver, drunk driver loosing control of the car...Hello!  It is a crime to leave your child alone in a car, PERIOD!   Dr. Phil I have to say this is the first time that your response sucked! 

 

It is a crime!  And by her getting arrested I can GUARANTEE you that she will never leave her child or children alone ever again!  She needs to face her wrong doing and learn from it instead of trying to get people to help her make what she did OK. 

 

"It is a crime!  And by her getting arrested I can GUARANTEE you that she will never leave her child or children alone ever again!  She needs to face her wrong doing and learn from it instead of trying to get people to help her make what she did OK." 

 

I agree with your post and it is disheartening that the parents on this board are minimizing their behavior.  Children are not pets that you can leave alone at home or unattended in a vehicle (not that I would leave a pet unattended in a vehicle).  As I stated in my post, it is my opinion that leaving your child unattended for one or two seconds is not appropriate behavior.  It does not matter if your child is left unattended while you are 30 feet. away...that is neglect. 

 
December 22, 2008, 4:55 pm CST

CAN YOU DOLL!!

Quote From: yourprincessdi

Today's show had a "baby" in a car seat left in car..
Please when you show a baby in a car seat MAKE SURE THE BABY IS IN THE CARSEAT CORRECTLY!!!!
I know it was NOT a real baby BUT you showed that you and your CREW does NOT know the correct way in secure a baby in a seat.. The strap was NOT positioned right. Please I have been through 40 hours of child seat inspection and installation.. Most of the child and babies are not secured in the seat correctly or the seat is NOt installed right.. Alot of children get hurt or killed by not being in their seats correctly.
Please check the next time for proper usage..
Thank you,
Diane
LOL WOW IT WAS A DOLL!!!!  Pour Dr. phil and his staff people like you make thier job harder
 
December 22, 2008, 5:01 pm CST

12/22 Parents Falsely Accused

Quote From: momto2auties

What doesn't make sense to me is that my neigbor (who is a Sheriff) can let his 3 kids play in the front yard, while he and his wife are inside.  And, yet, if they were to load up the van and realize they left the car keys inside, it would be illegal for them to go inside and get them with the kids in the car?  That makes no sense.  I think some on here have made a pretty good point about it only takes once to regret it, so it could be argued that  you should unload all your kids and have them walk with you into the house while you get the keys you left in your other purse.  I have to say, some of you have a good point.  But, if we're going to do that, then why don't we make it illegal for kids to play in their front yard without an adult present?  I NEVER let my kids play in the front yard without me out there with them.  I think that is WAY more dangerous than the situation they showed here.

Well said. Agree whole-heartedly.  My 3 are all alive and well despite such "horrible odds" of living everyday life.  They should be arresting all the moms in the playground who's kids are 30 ft. away on the swing I guess now too, huh?  I call it "strain at a gnat, swallow a camel" syndrome.

 
December 22, 2008, 5:19 pm CST

For Lynn and family

My heart goes out to you for the suffering you have all endured.  I'm so sorry for your losses and hope desperately for your recovery from these tragedies.
 
December 22, 2008, 5:29 pm CST

12/22 Parents Falsely Accused

Quote From: uranut

"It is a crime!  And by her getting arrested I can GUARANTEE you that she will never leave her child or children alone ever again!  She needs to face her wrong doing and learn from it instead of trying to get people to help her make what she did OK." 

 

I agree with your post and it is disheartening that the parents on this board are minimizing their behavior.  Children are not pets that you can leave alone at home or unattended in a vehicle (not that I would leave a pet unattended in a vehicle).  As I stated in my post, it is my opinion that leaving your child unattended for one or two seconds is not appropriate behavior.  It does not matter if your child is left unattended while you are 30 feet. away...that is neglect. 

I can’t believe that people would say that leaving a child within your line of sight for 10 seconds is abuse.  There is a lack of common sense with this issue.  I thought the lady who stated that she would take the baby out of the car in order to drop off a letter was ridiculous as well. 

 

This is one of those things that must be considered depending on the scenario.  Generally, I do not agree with leaving a child in the car but there is a difference between stopping your car to drop off a letter for example.  Or doing something idiotic like going into the store to purchase something while the child waits unattended- now that would be neglect.

 

 

 
December 22, 2008, 6:49 pm CST

12/22 Parents Falsely Accused

Quote From: ddoeshus

I say this from experiencs  IT IS NOT SAFER !!!  my baby was in the car for 30 seconds in my front yard strapped into her car seat and she was taken with the car I am not saying you are a bad parent  but I beg you one mom to another please dont do it anymore. The amount of heartbreak that me and my family went threw I would not wish that on my worst enamy god bless you and yours.
I'm so sorry for your lose and please don't take this the wrong way but the is why I lock my car and I'm never that far from it.
 
December 22, 2008, 7:38 pm CST

RIGHT ON!!

Quote From: joloff

CPS,DPS and all state child protective agencies. These agencies are given way to much power and attack struggeling parents all over.Why?Low income parents are the target.Federal funding being used for the wrong reasons by these agencies.Rather than help parents and assist them in programs to keep families together,the children are ripped out from under them,placed in adoptive foster homes after being placed in several homes.The children are damaged and forced into seperation from brothers, sisters,  parents,  grandparents and so on while being placed into the hands of strangers.The Courts,public defenders and social workers all are a part of this problem.Take away the funds and it will stop.Parents rights and child rights are being violated daily in states like Florida and California and many other states.It is like a black market for baby selling by these agencies.Yes there are some parents who should not have children.For those children,a safe heaven is needed.The nightmares are true what families have gone through with these agencies.They should have never lost the children taken from them wrongfully.There are many parents fighting for the children taken and wrongfully accused by social workers.Social workers trick and trap parents into saying things that are false with threats of losing their children if they do not agree with them in interviews,  investigations and so on.I have seen this first hand and hope that this will send the message to those workers that they are being watched.The Wheel of Fortune they play in meetings for who can get the most kids and get a bonus,  well known in Florida to DPS for Federal Funding of adoptive foster homes, must stop now.Families are being destroyed by these agencies who are now private and use court systems to get the money for children who belong with their own familes.Leave this job for law enforcement and close the door on Federal Funding  to these agencies.New programs need to be in place for good foster homes and programs for parents to be better parents.  Child Protection Agencies have gone to far.The heads of these departments like the one in Florida was using foster children in child porn.Other children were dead,missing and foster homes were still collecting funds for children who had not been in these homes for seven or more years.Parents searched for children lost in this system and had parental rights destroyed wrongfully because they could not afford a lawyer.Public defenders and legal aid are not permitted to provide a truthful defense or any defense for these parents and the parents are not heard by the court systems.The very minute these children come into the hands of child protective services,the parents have already lost them and no matter how much they try to fight and be heard,they are rejected and denied due process of law.The courts are one sided and there is no fairness for the parents.I pray for these families and that the tax payers take a stand of what they are paying for and why.The self and unjust enrichment of DPS and CSP is the key.

You said it!! CSP/DSP/DFCS - Power hungry and  money hungry. Adopt out and get the check!  False allegations... They don't care... Pull in the federal funds!  Keep my JOB!!  We are growing in numbers to fight against the corruption of these government entities.  We need to change the laws to hold those that work for these agencies responsible for their actions!  Fight with us - WWW.FIGHTCPS.COM!

 

Show them we have our rights and will continue to fight against these kidnappers!

 

RIGHT ON!

 
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