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Topic : 12/22 Parents Falsely Accused

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Created on : Friday, September 12, 2008, 01:20:40 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 09/18/08) Could you be guilty of abusing your child and not know it? Where are the boundaries when it comes to parenting? Treffly is a mom of three who never thought she would be accused of breaking the law. But that's exactly what happened when she left her daughter in the car to do an errand just 30 feet away. Treffly's case sparked a flurry of opinions and heated debates across the country. People in the community and a criminal defense attorney weigh in. And find out what Dr. Phil thinks about Treffly's encounter with the law. Then, Lynn says her biggest regret is leaving her daughter alone the night the 13-year-old died. Find out how a false allegation landed her behind bars. Her conviction was overturned, and Lynn became the first woman in U.S. history to be cleared by DNA evidence. Hear how the truth came to light and what life has been like since she was released from prison. And, hear about Lynn's son, Ed's, experience growing up in foster care as a result of his mother's incarceration. What can mother and son do to rebuild their bond? Find out what you can do to improve the lives of children in the foster care system. Plus, don't miss the steps you need to take if you're wrongly accused of a crime. Join the discussion.

Find out what happened on the show.

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December 23, 2008, 12:54 pm CST

12/22 Parents Falsely Accused

Quote From: autumn_j

I mean still anyone can come along and take your kids did she leave the keys in the ignition? Also on a slightly trivial note is treffly her real name or some fake name? What kind of name is Treffly?
I find the name pretty and unique..maybe they wanted something better and less trivial than say...being named after a season?  Theres more to people than their name you know?
 
December 23, 2008, 12:55 pm CST

12/22 Parents Falsely Accused

Quote From: erinm54

Standing right next to your car while pumping gas and walking away from your car with your child in it is so completely diffrent.  I have NEVER left my child in the car UNATTENDED.  That is the point.  Standing right by the car in not unattended.  If you need to go in and pay then you take your child with you. 

As a parent, always think ahead.  You can purchase gas with a credit card at the pump  and you can go thru a drive-thru for just about any thing you may want with the children in their car seats or seat belts safely beside you.
 
December 23, 2008, 2:43 pm CST

If the police are so bored...

...that they need to arrest someone for leaving a child in car for 10 seconds I have a better idea for them (which personally I don't think is that big a deal, people put there kids in all kinds of much greater danger all the time-look at all the parents who mistakenly put there kids in flip over mobiles because they are too lazy to do the research to see that they are much more dangerous than a normal passenger car).

Anyway back to my original point if the police have nothing better to do then arrest people who leave there kids in cars for 10 seconds, GO ARREST THE CORPORATE CRIMINALS ON WALL STREET. 
 
December 23, 2008, 5:55 pm CST

12/22 Parents Falsely Accused

Quote From: coastal20

I  was reminded of the person who left her child to go in Subway and before she was in the store, n individual stole her car wth her child. The woman tried to get her child out of the back seat, but the door closed and her child was dragged to the death by the car thief. NEVER leave you child unattended.

It had nothing to do with negligence but emotion instead. Obviously she couldnt call 911 because it would have had to be from a cell phone and 911 doesnt handle them calls to well ,if at all, because they always want to know WHO is calling and from where and NOT what is going on and where (crime), so she probably felt immedite rescue or nothing, BUT know what you are doing or dont attempt rescue.

 

Everybody will leave their child unattended. It is the smart ones who already have a safe environment in place that never get caught as it should be.Some parents who have their kids right in front of them are more dangerous. Discretion is always the best rule. No such thing as "never".That word used in that sense can only cause hysteria. (overly sensative reactions cause RIOTS).  No body should EVER be hysteric over any mistake because two wrongs dont cant make a right. Slippery slope. Too much care can be just as deadly.It is about good Intentions intentions not emotional reactions.

 
December 23, 2008, 5:55 pm CST

12/22 Parents Falsely Accused

Quote From: coastal20

I  was reminded of the person who left her child to go in Subway and before she was in the store, n individual stole her car wth her child. The woman tried to get her child out of the back seat, but the door closed and her child was dragged to the death by the car thief. NEVER leave you child unattended.

It had nothing to do with negligence but emotion instead. Obviously she couldnt call 911 because it would have had to be from a cell phone and 911 doesnt handle them calls to well ,if at all, because they always want to know WHO is calling and from where and NOT what is going on and where (crime), so she probably felt immedite rescue or nothing, BUT know what you are doing or dont attempt rescueEverybody will leave their child unattended. It is the smart ones who already have a safe environment in place that never get caught as it should be.Some parents who have their kids right in front of them are more dangerous. Discretion is always the best rule. No such thing as "never".That word used in that sense can only cause hysteria. (overly sensative reactions cause RIOTS).  No body should EVER be hysteric over any mistake because two wrongs dont cant make a right. Slippery slope. Too much care can be just as deadly.It is about good Intentions intentions not emotional reactions.
 
December 23, 2008, 6:26 pm CST

Facts?

Quote From: socialworkmom

If you are going to be critical of the childwelfare system you must first know the facts.  I have worked in child welfare for 15+years.  I believe in the system and although not perfect does a very good job.  Each state in the Union has seperate laws.  In Pennsylvania the system is County run with regulations from the state and federal goverment.  Child Welfare can not become involved unless there is an allegation.  Although many believe that we pick on people this is not accurate.  There also needs to be an allegation of abuse or neglect as defined by the Child Protective Service Law (CPSL) and the Juvenile Act. There also must be a perpatrator as defined by law.  Again in Pa this is a parent ,guardian, significant other of a parent or guardian, caretaker or household member over the age of 14.  This does not mean that other abuse does not exist it just does not fall under the jurisdiction of Child Welfare however does fall under the jurisidiction of Law Enforcement.  It is also important to understand that the standard between law enforcement and Child Welfare is different.  Law Enforcement is attempting to determine if a criminal act has occured and Child Welfare is looking at Child Abuse.  It is possible to have one without the other.  Child Welfare is always being condemened for doing to much or not enough.  Prior to making judgement be sure that all the facts are accurate and present.  Although I am unable to speak for all agencies across the nation I will and can assure you that my agency takes the job and children very seriously and follow the letter of the law. 

Facts??. What you descibe is an inditemnet on our child judicial system. Isn't child abuse "A" criminal act?. What is the matter with Law enforcemenet ? Are  children NOT important enough to be investigated by police rather than Welfare. I don't know what you know, but police are more equipped to invetigate abuse AND crimes better than welfare, but I guess it is self explanatory why abuse goes to welfare and not police. It is because (like you said) it is not  a crime. Since when?

 

You might have ALL the Facts but dont get too confident over it because they are all screwed up. I could know  alot about politics, but that doesn,t mean I got  (know) anything good. (Or the Denver Bronco's) 

Good to know where our problems start with this subject though and thanks for the tips. Anything you can offer to change this BROKEN ( and it is very broken) ( or maybe the in the closet child molesters are running it ) system would be greatly appreciated.  And dont forget to pay YOUR loyalty dues to your employer and or union or you will be out in the cold like all those neglected children. Thanks. The Spy in the sky.

 
December 23, 2008, 6:59 pm CST

Child abuse? What is it?

Harm to a child for the abusers benefit. Simple as that. Neglect laziness shelfishness sexual pleasure just some examples. Over reactions by accussers just to gain reaction from law enforcement is a self serving act and therefore should be ignored most of the time. There is so much GRAY area surrounding what is child abuse. You can put innocent people away JUST because of an over reactive investigator that maybe didnt like the way this lady was mannered or looked and so on, OR an investigator who might like a smiling charming child molester that couldn't make the devil mad. It happens this way more than most realize. So descretionary has no real set rule . it is no wonder this law fluctuates so much. From leaving a kid in a car for a second, and driving some insane over it to knowing a molester lives right next door and not wanting anything do  with it. Go figure. And I will bet Dr. Phil has done that in his own car if I was a betting man. Sorry Doc. The shame here is when a neighbor KNOWS a child is being molested EVERYBODY  is afraid to get involved, but they all want to jump all over a child left in car for a few minutes. Get a life to ya all who do this for your own misguided and attention seeking needs and satisfaction. It is all about getting attention. For themselves. Tell on someone act like they care, etc..and hope they are made into hero's , but not having any guts to report REAL crime when it happens, because they might look stupid or might not hit that home run so easily here. The reward isn't so easily gained.    Please only cry wolf ONLY when it is REALLY needed.And it is ONLY needed when you are doing it for somebody OTHER  than you.  
 
December 24, 2008, 6:59 am CST

Wrongly Accused

Dr. Phil:

 

Your show on Parents wrongly accused was eye opening.  What is frightening to me is that I know a Family in Olathe, KS. that is living this nightmare.  What went wrong with laws intended to protect children, not turn us into a Police State.  I can not believe this is happening in the United States. 

 

My Freind innocently turned some film into Walmart to be developed.  Walmart called the Police because there were naked pictures of a toddler on the film.  When did this become a crime?  I think there may have been pictures that included naked Barbie Dolls.  Are you kidding me????

 

These very good People, hard working, small business owners, married for a long time, adore their Children have had their lives destroyed!  The State of Kansas has absolutely destroyed this Family.  I read alot of History, this is Nazi Governing!!!!

 

My Freinds have not seen their Children in 3 months!!!!  They were sent to Foster Care, instead of being comforted by Family members who they know and love!  How can this be possible.  The "System," has decided this Family and especially the Parents need "Counciling."  Are they serious!!!

 

Who decides which Parenting techniques are right or wrong.  These Children were and are, loved, fed, warm, educated, and part of a normal American Family!!!!

 

I want so desperately to help, I want to advocate for these Parents, I want this Nazi Governing to stop.  This is not what John Wlash intended when he and Parents of missing Children went before Congress in the 70's.

 

Please give me some resouces to help my Friends.  They have been tortured enough,  to say nothing of the Financial devastation they are enduring.  The State of Kansas is cruel.  The "system," has completely beaten these People down.  Where do you turn?

 
December 24, 2008, 8:17 am CST

Abuse

Surely there are abused children in our country who need help.  But the biggest abuser is the system that is supposed to help them. I believe the lady that left the previous comment about her friends. My heart breaks for these children torn from their parents. This is no less traumatizing to kids then being kidnapped in a grocery store by a stanger.
This happened to me. My children were kidnapped and held hostage because of a rediculous allegation by a caseworker. Children have no rights. When you have intelligent,  articulate teenagers telling all these workers that they are not abused, we are not poor, my mother doesn't use drugs or even drink for that matter, and nothing whatsoever is wrong and they caseworker ignores all evidence and takes them away, it is insane. You would never in a million years think that someone could make a phone call and have your children stolen in the United States. You are wrong. Families rights are trampled upon.  They don't really care about the children, only about themselves. About "winning" the case. They lie, purjure themselves, and fabricate evidence. Must most commonly, they twist any statement around to suit them. For instance, a neighbor spoke to the caseworker, at lenghth, about what a wonderful family we have.  But the caseworker writes down one line. When asked about our house, the neighbor said it's not perfect, a little messy (meaning it's normal) and worker writes down that house is filthy and in disrepair. They deliberately omit pertinent info and only relay info to the court that they can twist to be damaging. Parents are PRESUMED guilty until found innocent. Their reputations are ruined.  People think "there must be something going on behind the scenes."  It takes months to get in front of a judge to prove your innocence while children who have never been separated from their parents are held hostage in a strange place. Traumatized.  I don't think that most children  will ever fully recover from this.  The system needs reform now. A couple of state senators, Pam Roach and Nancy Schafer, are working on this. Check out their sites and support them.
 
December 24, 2008, 10:15 am CST

12/22 Parents Falsely Accused

Quote From: lily722

Surely there are abused children in our country who need help.  But the biggest abuser is the system that is supposed to help them. I believe the lady that left the previous comment about her friends. My heart breaks for these children torn from their parents. This is no less traumatizing to kids then being kidnapped in a grocery store by a stanger.
This happened to me. My children were kidnapped and held hostage because of a rediculous allegation by a caseworker. Children have no rights. When you have intelligent,  articulate teenagers telling all these workers that they are not abused, we are not poor, my mother doesn't use drugs or even drink for that matter, and nothing whatsoever is wrong and they caseworker ignores all evidence and takes them away, it is insane. You would never in a million years think that someone could make a phone call and have your children stolen in the United States. You are wrong. Families rights are trampled upon.  They don't really care about the children, only about themselves. About "winning" the case. They lie, purjure themselves, and fabricate evidence. Must most commonly, they twist any statement around to suit them. For instance, a neighbor spoke to the caseworker, at lenghth, about what a wonderful family we have.  But the caseworker writes down one line. When asked about our house, the neighbor said it's not perfect, a little messy (meaning it's normal) and worker writes down that house is filthy and in disrepair. They deliberately omit pertinent info and only relay info to the court that they can twist to be damaging. Parents are PRESUMED guilty until found innocent. Their reputations are ruined.  People think "there must be something going on behind the scenes."  It takes months to get in front of a judge to prove your innocence while children who have never been separated from their parents are held hostage in a strange place. Traumatized.  I don't think that most children  will ever fully recover from this.  The system needs reform now. A couple of state senators, Pam Roach and Nancy Schafer, are working on this. Check out their sites and support them.
Thanks! I'll certainly check out their sites. I've been saying for years that CPS needs oversite.
 
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