Topic : 12/26 "Brainwashed by My Parents"

I have an ex husband who has sabotaged  my son's relationship with me, his mother. It has been 6 years since we divorced and he has been remarried for 4. We also has a daughter, 13 and he hasn't seen her in over a year now. My son went to live with him during the divorce because his dad convinced him that he would not make it  if he were alone. I can tell you that almost every terrible word that came out of my sons mouth, when he was with his father, were the same words that came out of my ex's mouth. I did not want to add to the preassure my son must have been feeling so I did not say anything back during these times. My son is now 20 and I still do not not have contact with him. My ex brought him to a child support hearing, regarding his sister, my ex's daughter, after he graduated. My son was crying because my ex convinced him that if he was ordered to pay more child support he would not be able to go to college.  Now, my ex's wife is writing terrible letters to my daugher on the wife's Myspace. My ex has not seen his daughter in over a year and blames me. Only I have not and will not encourage my daughter NOT o see her father. He has chosen not to visit because he says it is unfair that he has to drive to pick her up AND drop her off  for HIS visits. We only live about a mile away and I have told him he can come and see her whenever he wants. How do fight back with this kind of sabotage? The only thing I can so is survive and keep trying to let my son know I love him and always will. That I am here and always will be. For my daughter? I feel bad for her because she should have a relationship with dad. What can I do?

Just for your reference her mother couldn't respond because she is dead.. she didn't have an attorney that could respond. Melissa's mother was my Aunt. She was a very caring and loving person. It is very easy to judge when only one side is given. But really thanks for the compassion.

My son's mother has played almost every "game" there is when it comes to my son's feelings toward me. He is now 16, and I haven't seen him in over 5 years. It has been 2 years since I have talked to him on the phone. I split up with her when I he was 3 yrs old. From that time on she has done and said many thing to get my own son to hate me and not even want to talk to me.

One of the first big events that happened when he was 5 yrs old; I had him for my scheduled visit, every other weekend. When she came to pick him up on Sunday, she told him to "give your father a kiss and hug, you are never going to see him again!" My son walked up to me with tears and held on to me so tight with tears running down his face, telling me he loved me. Then she pulled him away from me and drag him by the arm to the car as he yelled out not to take him away. The next day I couldn't get a hold of her, went by her house and they were gone, the house empty. She never said where she was going. She didn't even tell child support what her new address was, she had her mom send her the checks. She moved 500 miles away in another state. 2 years later, no phone calls or letters, she moved back to the town where I lived and called me and asked me if I wanted to see him, of course I said yes. When she came back she allowed me to have visitation, which was every other weekend during school and every 2 weeks on and off in the summer. She never stuck to these rules set by the Judge that we seen. It was when my son and his mother felt like obeying them.

Since then, the one thing I know she has been telling him when he would come for visitation, is that I wanted to take him away from her and never let him see her or her mother again, he told me this. So he would want to go back to her right away after I picked him up.

The last time I seen him was when he was 11 yrs old and visited for a week in the summer. I lived 4 hours away from them at that time. I picked him up and brought him to my house. We had fun for 2 days, with his mom calling every day to talk to him. The 2nd day when she called she and his brother and sister all told him how much they would miss him if I kept him away from them and didn't return him. They kept asking him when he was coming home. They all kept saying thing like this until he was crying for me to take him back home again. I took him home that same day, after I broke down and cried a while. I told him I would never take him from his mother or her family. I never talk bad about his mother in front of him, in fact I talked her up or I didn't say anything if I had nothing good to say about her. After I took him home I called and talked to him a few times. Then all of a sudden she told me that he didn't want to speak to me. Every time I called she would tell me the same thing. And the last time I talked to him was when my mother passed away. When I called to tell him, and see if she might let him go to the funeral, she told me that he still didn't want to talk to me. So I hung up and 10 minutes later my son called me back, he said hi, I started crying and I could hear in the background his mother telling him "ask him", then he says did grandma leave any money for me? I couldn't believe what I was hearing. I told him no, she didn't have that much and that his grandpa was still alive. He abruptly said bye and hung up. And I haven't heard anything since. All my letters I send to him I get no reply, I assume she is just throwing them away.

HOW DARE THAT WOMAN LAWYER SIT THERE AND SAY THAT CRAP I'M A WOMAN AND I WILL TELL YOU A FEW THINGS I 'M GOING TO SIGN UP FOR LAW SCHOOL MONDAY BECAUSE LISTEN TO THIS STORY. IN 1998 I MET MY CURRENT HUSBAND WE WERE BOTH GOING THROUGH A DIVORCE AT THE TIME HE HAD A SON WITH HIS WIFE AND I HAD 2 DAUGHTERS WELL IN THE MITS OF ALL HIS THIS EX OF HIS PLAYED SOME DIRTY TRICKS HERE IS A LIST OF THEM

1. ALIENTATED HIS SON FROM HIM ILLEGAL VISISTATION INTERFENCE AFTER ANOTHER

2. LIED TO JUDGES GOT RESTRAINING ORDERS

3. CALLED WELFARE AND LIED

4. MADE FALSE POLICE REPORTS

5. BURNED THE SON WITH CIGARETTES AND WHIPPED HIM WITH SWITCHES

6. HAD SEX WITH HIM IN THE SAME BED

7. TIED HIM TO THE PORCH SO HE COULDN'T LEAVE THE YARD

8. LOCKED HIM IN HIS ROOM

9. KICKED OUR NEWBORN DAUGHTERS OUT OF THERE BOUNCER AND SAID MY MOMMY TOLD ME TO DO IT SO I DIDN'T HAVE TO COME BACK YOU WOULDN'T LET ME

OH WAIT HE WAS 1 WHEN THIS STARTED

THEN SHE CALLED AFTER SIX YEARS OF THIS CRYING SHE COUDN'T HANDLE HIM IN SCHOOL HELP HER I WILL GIVE YOU JOINT CUSTODY BLAH BLAH WELL IN THE END SHE WAS ARRESTED FOR CONSPIRACY TO COMMIT AND SOLICITATION TO COMMIT MURDER OF MY HUSBAND WHILE THE CHILD WAS IN OUR CARE SHE PAID SOMEONE MONEY AND THE COURTS GAVE HER SIX MONTHS IN JAIL AND SIX MONTHS PROBATION WHOOPEE WOW AND THEN SHE GETS OUT AND THE JUDGE HAD THE NERVE TO TELL US THE CRIME WASN'T AGAINST THE CHILD SHE STILL HAD RIGHTS TO SEE HIM AFTER TWO YEARS SO THEN SHE CALLED WELFARE AND GOT ANOTHER RESTRAINING ORDER YEARS OF THIS GOING ON WHAT ABOUT THE CHILD AND ALL THE UNFOUNDED REPORTS AFTER THAT SHE HADN'T SEEN HIM IN TWO YEARS WHEN WE WENT BACK TO COURT AND SHOWED THE JUDGE IT WAS ANOTHER LIE AND THEN WHEN WE ASKED FOR CHILD SUPPORT SHE WANTED TO SEE HIM AGAIN AFTER THAT CRAP THEN SHE DECIDED AFTER 4 YEARS SHE WAS GOING TO SIGN OFF ALL RIGHTS TO HIM AND BECAUSE SHE DIDN'T WANT TO PAY WOW YOU WANT TO TELL ME THAT WOMAN DIDN'T USE THIS PRECIOUS INNOCENT CHILD AS A WEAPON A PAWN A TOOL AGAINST THE FATHER AND ALIENATE HIM THROUGH ALL THIS I LOST MY TWIN SON BECAUSE OF THE STRESS AND HAD A COMPLETE HYSTERECTOMY AND THE COURTS WON'T HELP US NOT EVEN WITH LAWYERS FEES NOTHING OVER 50000.00 LATER AND A MESSED UP CHILD THAT HAS FETAL ALCOHOL SYNDROME BEHAVIORAL PROBLEMS BI POLAR MANIC DEPRESSIVE AND SHE GETS TO WALK AWAY SAD ISN'T IT. SO LET ME HERE ANOTHER ONE LAWYERS LIE AND GO BEHIND YOUR BACK TO GET THERE MONEY ROB YOU CLEAN AND CHASE YOU FOR MONEY THEY DON'T CARE WHAT HAPPENS TO THESE CHILDREN. SO NOW AFTER YEARS OF DOING THIS ON MY OWN AND SEEING HOW MEN GET TREATED AND THESE INNOCENT CHILDREN ONE WAY OR ANOTHER I WILL PUT MYSELF THROUGH COLLEGE TO HELP THEM AND HELP PEOPLE THAT ARE HONEST AND BEING ALIENTATED FROM THERE CHILDREN AND HELP THOSE CHILDREN GET HELP THEY REALLY NEED FROM THESE PYSCHO WOMAN OUT THERE AND WAKE THESE JUDGES UP THAT MOTHERS DON'T ALWAYS DESERVE CUSTODY OF THERE CHILDREN. SO TAKE THAT TO THE BANK I HAVE ALL THE LEGAL PAPERWORK TO PROVE EVERYTHING I HAVE JUST SAID SO ASK ME. THAT LAWYER NEEDS TO SEE REAL WORLD OUT HERE AND SHUT HER MOUTH. THANK YOU FOR READING TONYA D. McGREGOR