Topic : 10/29 Gender Confused Children

As far as the show is concerned, could you please shut up that woman and let someone else talk!!!???!!!

I mean, she might say that she is all resolved and content about her decision and how she handled her son's transgender, but she clearly has a lot of anger.  She is probably mad that these men represent a therapy that worked and wishes she had been able to do that...  But that's not the point...shut up already...you can't call other people intolerant if you never actually stop ranting and raving long enough to let anyone else speak or share their position.  Enough already .

And as far as the comment about hetersexuality being natural, why is that so offensive?  It has to be natural because its the only way people can reproduce.  Not being able to continue on your species seems a bit unnatural, doesn't it?  I mean lets not be so thinned skinned here.  Why are we so hung up on having to tell everyone they are marvelous "just the way they are"?  I mean, if things are so marvelous, then I guess they woudn't be on these shows, eh?  Looks like a lot of pain and chaos to me.  And if it's so natural to be gay, or transgender or whatever, then why all the therapies, support groups, etc.  The last time I checked, those things aren't needed for heterosexuals.  I am so sick of the political correctness.  No one can say anything anymore, for fear of being called "judgemental."  Heaven forbid, I mean the very people who are always ranting and accusing others of being judgemental (like the guest Mom was doing today) won't shut up long enough to realize how intolerant THEY are being!

If therapies work that help the child/person find their born gender, then why not listen and learn from them?  I've heard people that went through the therapy say they are grateful for the help.  That hostile Mom has some issues, and I feel sorry for her child.

Please, stop being so overly sensitive.  I am so tired of PC types that have to read into every tiny word to try to extract some additional meaning...and usually looking for something to prove their point that they or someone else is being harmed in some way...its so martyr.  So what if Dr. Phil says "this" or "that" or his or her?  If I say I'm here to pick up my child, and the daycare worker says "this one?" to clarify my child over another, has my child somehow been victimized?  Please!  Get a life already.

It seems that we have not backed off from this emotionally charged issue to look at the "big picture."

Looking at the big picture is not always thought of as a positive thing because it might not fit with what we

want right now.

What we want right now is to take away the hurt and confusion these kids and adults are feeling, and the

hurt that others inflict on them. That is human and compassionate. That says good things about us.

However, biologically speaking, what does it mean for a race or culture to embrace this direction?

I know there are people who are very offended by the use of the word "natural," however, if we look at nature, we would be worried about the health and well-being of a species if we were to see a situation

happening that would decrease the gene pool. If we increasingly saw a lack of interest of the male for

for the female of that species, biologists would be concerned about the general health of the continuation

of the species.

Why are we seeing this shift in gender identification? What is happening that the male baby is increasingly  rejecting the hormone that helps them identify themselves with the chromosomes

and genitals they are formed with? Is anyone interested in these questions or just the politically correct response?

I was upset about the way that the mother was feeling.  Sehe had mad a choice after prevous efforts and lengthy time of trying to decide how to handle the concern she had that her son was not comfortable with his identity and wanted to be a girl.  The mother apparently had struggled with this and made a decision based on the apparent desperation of her son. Now that the decision was made and supported by the mother (and apparently the father at the time), to be the person she really wanted to be, the mother seemed to have to defend her decision to the physicians who felt that their way was the "natural" and accepted way that all children should should be "encouraged to develop".  I felt so sorry for that mother.  I am a single mother with three adult children, 1-43 yr son and a daughter - 40 and another daughter 38.  At times members of my family  thought that my son was more feminine than masculine.  I did encourage him to be a boy, because he reallly did not act like he wanted to be anything else.  He did have counseling as he had difficulty with "who he was" relative to what other contemporary boys were doing, etc.  He wore a Milwaukee Brace and had not played sports of any kind and he was very studious.  I supported his studies and interst in Greek Mythology, etc.  I tried not to make him feel like his interests were "pipe dreams".  The worst thing in the world, I think is to make a person, especially a young person feel as though there is something wrong with themselves.  At most we all have trouble at sme point in our ives, feeling that what we are doing is right and we try very hard not to be influenced by what others think. 

    It must be very hard for this young girl, her brothers and her mother to adapt to the changes.  It appeared from some of the clips that the girl is very excited about her identity.  I think that the family should do all that is necessary to accept ( with professional help if necessary) to see that this sister, and daughter is the same person, with the same "links" that you spoke of Dr. Phil - things in their ives that they can remember to link them together.  At some point, I can imagine that they may be able to laugh about some of the tricks they used to play on each other and get away with it, and now how the sister knows what her brothers are about since she might have shared some of those thoughts and behaviors at one time and now whe has "one up on them".  As for the brothers in school, they will probably get a lot of slack from friends about their sister.  With expressing feelings and thoughts through counseling, hopefully they can learn to defend, or at best ignore the comments of others.  Sometimes it is better to disregard, sometimes it's better to defend, whatever is the best course of action.  This may need some professional help for all of them.  I do empathize with this family.  No one should feel less than a human being because of the color of their skin, their ethnic orientation or their personal preferences re: gender or selection of friends, hobbies, etc. 

   I happen to be an African American and because of my light complexion, I caught heck from black and white people, peers and adults.  It is not a comfortable feeling as you are growing up.....not to feel a part of anything...... trying to excel in ways to make your own place in the world.  Once I came to grips with the fact that I was who I was and I had nothing to do with my "hue", I began to feel much better about myself.  I was an adult with 2 children and was trying to help them feel good about themselves.  You have to set the example, I thought, or they will be like me, unsure of themselves.  It took some counseling, and after a divorce, it ws even harder.  But I am 69.5 and going strong.  I am doing things that I did not do earlier like ballet and dancing classes - just becaus I want to.  Everyone has to have their day to be all that they can be!  I strongly believe in that.  You only pass through this life one time.  You might as well be as happy as you can and pass your love of life on to others!  I am a Christian and prayers and believing in God and His power made a great difference.

I love your show Dr. Phil and you have a very talented way of handling and diffusing emotional situations on our show.