Topic : 01/07 Omaha Mall Shooting: A Mother’s Guilt

A Doctor Guilt Mall Mother's Phil Shooting.Doctor Phil that was couple years back. See you on Wednesday-

Janurary 07th, 2009. (Center Mall Nebraska. Omaha Shopping.) Sincerley Your. Russell Vlaanderen.--------

I live here in Omaha and will NEVER FORGET the events of Dec 5th 2007. My heart goes out to the employees, shoppers, families of the victims and the community. ABC also lost an employee who was killed in a car accident outside of Grand Island NE while on his way here to cover the story.

Robert's mom was fully aware that the rifle was misssing the night before the shooting. She thought that he was just going to sell it. Knowing that he has threatened to kill people in the past I feel she should have called the police. 

His mother will never get over her guilt and I do feel sorry for her but there are also people who lost their lives that day that we need to remember.

Although what happened is horrible, reinstating the "Assault Weapons" ban is not the solution.  It is a knee jerk reaction.  It was proven in effective then and it would be ineffective now.  The people who would commit such atrocities do not care what the law is or they would not be shooting people to begin with.  he shape and design of a firearm does not make it good or bad.  The ban to begin with was based on the firearm looking "scary". We need more good, moral people carrying more guns more responsibly.  There was probably a "no guns" sign on the mall door to begin with.  Which means the good, responsible people were not carrying.  ONE person with a gun that day could have stopped this kid in his tracks.  In theory, everyone laying there guns down, joining hands and singing songs would be beautiful, it ain't gonna happen.  We are not going to disarm the bad guys, so disarming the good guys through some ban is not the answer!   The murderers and the drug dealers are not going to participate.  Why don't you guys rally to stiffen the laws already on the books and also keep criminals in prison instead of furlowing them out!

God bless all of you.  Peace be with you and your families.

Dr. Phil:

 

I am watching the show regarding the mom of the Omaha Mall shooting.  I can truly feel for this lady, as I have a daughter who committed suicide.  Thank God she only took her own life.  This lady seems to still be very deep in denial.  It took me years to accept my part of my daughter's growing up problems and I am still working toward accepting my guilt and forgiving myself.

Respectfully,

 

Gayle

Lafayette, IN

I listened to this show waiting to hear anything about healing.  I am a Christian and truly believe that in order to begin healing there has to be forgiveness.  This kid was definitely disturbed, but even if his mother and the woman he lived with had done things like get him under a doctors care, medication or even committment this tragedy could have still happened.  Our society doesn't follow through always like they should.  Doctors give up or worse yet patients learn how to tell them what they need to hear making the doctors believe progress is being made.  If he had been committed to a hospital in time he would have been released.  He could function in our society.  No one could have known the extent of his intentions as his past pointed mostly to him wanting to leave this world.  I truly believe that healing starts with forgiveness and even though the victim on the show really wanted to avoid the mother, he needed to confront her for his own sake.  I don't make light of the tragic outcome of this one person's actions.  But he made his own decision and did this for fame, something our media contributes to, then ended his own torment inside.  The victims can't honestly believe those two women were to blame.  Intervention might have delayed his action but only for a while.  My heart and prayers go out to each and every one involved with this and mostly I pray everyone can come to forgive, mourn their loss and find peace. 

You know, you have some valid points, but I have to disagree with you when you say that those two women were not to blame.  Yes, they were! They had a huge role in this whole problem. Did you listen closely when the mother said she wasn't in this boy's life for 10 years from the ages of 7 to 17? Did you hear her say she smoked pot with her son? Did you hear when she alluded to the fact that she was a drug addict and that that's why she wasn't able to have custody of her son? Were you listening when she said she knew the gun was there,  that she knew the night before that the gun was missing and "had a feeling" she'd better check out the Jeep...but ignored that feeling? Did you miss it when she said he'd told many people, including her, that he was going to commit suicide? 

 

What kind of mother decides to just ignore all the signs, the direct statement that her child is going to commit suicide; and all the other blatantly screaming signs that this kid was headed for major trouble? AND decides to do drugs with this messed up kid, on top of all the rest of her (and the father's) bad parenting decisions?

 

And the stepmother wasn't much better.

 

You cannot be your child's friend when they are growing up!! You HAVE to be a parent....strong, consistent, and sober!!  You, as a parent, are all that stands between your children and disaster until their brain grows enough to make good decisions on their own.

 

On that stage this morning, I saw a whole lot of crooked-little-finger-pointing at others, but not a whole lot of genuine honesty when the hard questions were asked.

 

It always amazes me how when something like this tragedy happens, and kids go totally out of control, the parents seem to say, "Oh I just don't understand how and why this could have happened"...and then you look at the ridiculous parenting methods and you will see why and how!

 

It's time to pay attention to your children and stop being so self-involved and immature yourself!

I am truly sorry for your loss!

 

I can't even imagine the grief and guilt you must have had to suffer through!

I hope you are able to find peace.

 

I worked as a volunteer on a suicide-crisis hot-line. Sometimes we were able to intervene and make a difference, and sometimes we weren't....sometimes they were just too far gone and just wanted to say goodbye to someone, anyone, and they called us.

 

I don't know your daughter's circumstances, or motivation, or if you would have been able to stop her...but I do know that sometimes you just can't.  

I have to agree with you!

 

It's a fact that when guns are banned, only criminals will have guns..which leaves the rest of us at their mercy; they'd LOVE that!

 

It's also a fact that in states and cities where people are legally licensed...AND trained...to carry concealed weapons, and where more law-abiding citizens own guns responsibly, the criminals are less likely to mess with them, and the crime rate actually goes down!

 

The best thing I heard in a long time was about this 90+ year old woman who held a young punk who tried to assault and rob her,  face down on the floor at gunpoint until the cops got there! I cheered for her! Can you imagine what he would have done to her had she not been armed?

I am from Nebraska and several people close to me were deeply affected by this incident. I have no sympathy for his non involved mother or the wack job who was trying to "save" him. Quite frankly I don't even feel sorry for his father who at the end told a judge "it's time to just let him sink or swim I have done everything I can". Believe it or not the only person anyone should feel sorry for is this deeply disturbed child and for all the people in his life that have let him down. His parents and the Nebraska court sytem. I mean think about it should we really all have been shocked when a year after this happens and allt he promises that were made to change the system and help kids nothing had been done, so when they had the safe haven law people were dropping their teenagers off left and right because otherwise there was no help for them. You know what the best part of all of this is?? They have made a commitee to look into where we have failed our children made up of senator and the same healthcare providers that have already screwed eveything up....not one citizen or parent who has lived this nightmare with their child.

Robbie Hawkins was a troubled child who perhaps even with the help he needed would have lashed out but so many people in his life just gave up on him including his parents and the people who were paid to help him, what did we as a society expect would happen?

I have not watched the show yet but I will and I hope Dr Phil lays it on the line for his Mother who I am sure will cry and say she wishes she had done more.....but it's a little late for that now isn't it?

 My opinion towards this entire subject, is if all you worried parents out there want to know how to prevent these terrible shootings from happening, become a solid voice together and make gun laws more intense, and for the love of your children, if you are going to own firearms, lock them up and have conversations with your kids about them.  That's one of the biggest problems with the United States, which makes me that much happier to be a Canadian: guns shouldn't be so easily owned. 

I also think that the marijuana has nothing to do with the shootings, and I feel that his mother smoking with him had only positive influence on him; it might have been a way for them to bond.  And seeing as their family is dysfunctional (like everybody's family), maybe that was a step in the right direction.  Chances are he was involved in more dangerous drugs, that I do not support, but marijuana is harmless.  Guns, however, war in other countries, that's a terrible thing for children to grow up around.

I can imagine I will be getting angry replies, and I welcome them.