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Topic : 04/14 An Addict in the Family

Number of Replies: 57
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Created on : Thursday, January 08, 2009, 05:04:27 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 01/12/09) While battling cancer, Paula says she missed the signs that her 21-year-old daughter, C.J., was disconnecting from the family and turning to drugs to heal her anguish. After Paula’s husband, Jim, had an affair, the signs of trouble with their daughter became clearer. Since then, the family has done everything, including rehab, counseling and tough love, but nothing has kept C.J. drug free. Now C.J. ingests combinations of 13 prescription and street drugs, and is on the edge of killing herself. Anthony, her brother, is fed up and says she is ruining their family. Can they survive the constant turmoil? And is C.J. ready to get clean? Next, one of the heroin twins returns to Dr Phil to celebrate one year of sobriety and share her difficult road to recovery. Plus, emergency room physician and host of The Doctors Dr. Travis Stork says that he rarely spends a night in the E.R. without seeing a victim of an accidental overdose of prescription drugs. Find out the most common mistakes people make and the questions you should ask yourself before you take a pill. Join the discussion.

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January 26, 2009, 1:47 pm CST

I strongly disagree with you!

Quote From: solarsteve

Dr. Phil, you missed the obvious with this family.  Both the father and brother of the drug addict are both chemically dependent.  Yes, they are both smokers, a deadly addiction.  They are both part of a drug culture that uses chemicals to reduce stress in their lives.  The daughter was singled out for her addiction, but the guys got away with their drug problemwithout your notice.  Dr. Phil, you should have had them go through withdrawal from nicotine at the same time that she was going through treatment.  They would appreciate much better what she would be going through.  It's also quite likely that they would have as hard a time quitting their addiction as she will.
  There is NO WAY that you can compare being addicted to cigarettes to being addicted to drugs. That's simply ludicrous! Most likely this girl will turn to cigs while she is going through rehab, almost all do. Yes, cigs are addictive, there's no way that anyone can argue that point. But there is a huge difference in what type of feeling you get between the two. I can't even continue to argue this point, it's such a silly one.
 
January 26, 2009, 2:24 pm CST

Are you kidding?

Quote From: kingzander

I JUST DONT GET WHAT THE BIG DEAL IS TAKING PERKS AND OXY. I DO IT WHENEVER I GET SOME THEN STOP WHEN I RUN OUT. I'M ACTUALLY GETTING SOME SOON, AND SINCE I DONT DRINK LIKE EVERYONE I KNOW, WHATS THE HARM IN ME TAKING MY DRUG OF CHOICE TOO.

  I refused to comment on the stories that are above your's because in two of them both mothers have lost a child in a terrible and sad manner. My husband and I lost a son in a car accident so we know how it feels although it was by another method. I have chosen to respect the two messages that I just mentioned because I know how heart breaking it is to lose a child and my heart goes out to them.

  But what you have written? This infuriates me to no end. First off, I want to state that I HAVE to take Oxycontin on a daily basis just to try and get through another day of the gut wrenching horrible pain that I suffer from. I am also closely monitored by a pain management specialist. If I could do without having to use this drug I would be the happiest woman on this earth. But I can't, my only other choice is to end it all because I can't take the pain any longer and personally that is not an option for me.

  What angers me so badly here is the fact that it's people such as you that has made my life a living hell. There is a shortage of pain management doctors now because of the fallout from prescription abuse and from people like you who choose to take these types of drugs for recreational use. I am disabled due to severe chronic pain and no longer able to work, to clean my home, cook, shop, etc.. This burden instead falls on my husband who already works over 14 hours a day, 6 days a week.

  My life has changed in so many ways and I have no quality of life. Even though I am already on Oxycontin, I am still unable to get most of my pain under control because I cannot find a doctor who is willing to raise my dosage for fear of being prosecuted. The dosage I take only takes the edge off, just enough to keep me sane. It's because of people like you that I am in this position. How dare you take this so lightly and think there is nothing wrong?

  Luckily I am NOT an addict, studies have proven that over 95% of chronic pain sufferer's do NOT become addicted to these med's, but there is that 5% that do. What does happen though is our bodies become dependent on them, meaning that if we were to stop taking them we would go through withdrawal. There's a huge difference between the two.

  You have just been lucky so far. You think you can play with these very serious med's and not get addicted, well go on and keep taking them. This statement that you made will come back and bite you on the butt someday. Anyone who takes such serious medications for recreational use is the EXACT type of person who will become an addict. You take it to get high. A person who takes it for pain does NOT get high like recreational users do, I don't get high at all. The pain alone absorbs that very quickly and after using it for years you never, never get that type of feeling. As a matter of fact, for me it went away in less than 2 weeks.

  So what's the harm in taking your drug of choice? HUGE! You are making life miserable for millions of people just like me who have to take OXY just to live and are having a very hard time in finding a doctor who will prescribe it, or prescribe enough to help us. You are taking away MY quality of life! That's the harm.

  You seriously need to do your research about these types of drugs, you need to learn how this type of behavior is hurting millions of innocent people in pain, you need to learn how easy it is for you to become an addict and take off those rose colored glasses that makes you think you're immune, above others who do become addicted. It will happen to you, just give it time.

  I highly suggest that in the future that you no longer make such dangerous remarks for others to read. It's very negligent on your part to suggest to others that taking drugs such as this for recreational use is OK and that for some people there is no danger in becoming addicted.

 

 
January 27, 2009, 5:35 pm CST

Good luck C.j

I know Cj not that well. But she dated my son for a short time. I hope she gets the help she needs. My thought and prayers are with her and her family!! God bless you!

 
January 27, 2009, 9:25 pm CST

Well, Well............

Quote From: kingzander

I JUST DONT GET WHAT THE BIG DEAL IS TAKING PERKS AND OXY. I DO IT WHENEVER I GET SOME THEN STOP WHEN I RUN OUT. I'M ACTUALLY GETTING SOME SOON, AND SINCE I DONT DRINK LIKE EVERYONE I KNOW, WHATS THE HARM IN ME TAKING MY DRUG OF CHOICE TOO.

I just happened to go back and read some of your prior posts. Funny you didn't mention this time around while talking so casually about "What's the big deal?" that you happen to be an addict. You said exactly that on Sept. 17, 2008 in a post right here on the Dr. Phil board. Get help and get it now! And in the future, do NOT suggest to others on this board or anywhere else that taking such serious drugs is no big deal. That's a very dangerous statement to make but maybe you were too loaded at the time to make a reasonable comment.
 
February 24, 2009, 12:02 pm CST

01/12 An Addict in the Family

Quote From: jewelsf

I just happened to go back and read some of your prior posts. Funny you didn't mention this time around while talking so casually about "What's the big deal?" that you happen to be an addict. You said exactly that on Sept. 17, 2008 in a post right here on the Dr. Phil board. Get help and get it now! And in the future, do NOT suggest to others on this board or anywhere else that taking such serious drugs is no big deal. That's a very dangerous statement to make but maybe you were too loaded at the time to make a reasonable comment.
Being an addict is not fun, we didn't choose it, it just happened.  I have sympathy for anyone that get's addiicted to any drug,  Paula, Natalie sends her best for your family, from her mom,Lori
 
April 14, 2009, 12:19 pm CDT

Recovering Addict Can Help!

Hi Dr. Phil:

My name is Jeri I am a female age 33 with 3 and 1/2 years clean from all the same drugs that CJ is using. I would love to offer my email to her for advice and hope. I know how it is to feel like you can't stop using. I have been there. I have been homeless, hospitalized and helpless. Today I am happy, healty and whole please please let her know she is not responsible for her disease but she IS RESPONSIBLE for her recovery. 12 Step Programs work, I sponsor women and girls one whom is 17 years old and they are getting better. It is available to us all it is a simple, spiritual program. I would love to share my experience, strength and hope with this lost and lonely young lady. Just for today I NEVER have to use again and God and I grateful!

 

Thanks for your time!

 

IN Loving Service,

Jeri Z.

clean date 11/14/05

 
April 14, 2009, 12:23 pm CDT

Rat Her Out To The Cops . . .

. . . and do not bail her out.

 

This is currently the quickest and most effective way to save her --- at least temporarily.

 
April 14, 2009, 1:09 pm CDT

Help for the Family

I feel this show did a good service to the daughter.  She is willing to go into treatment.  It allowed the family to share their anger/frustration.  But no real help was offered to the family.  Just an opportunity for them to talk.  How come programs like Nar-Anon or Al-Anon are not mentioned?  The Mom/Dad and Brother need help too. 
 
April 14, 2009, 1:42 pm CDT

Addicts are a nightmare to their family

What these parents need to do is find some way to get her arrested for some crime related to her drugs. My son is a recovering addict. I do not say he is recovered because that is an on going process. I endured much of what these parents endured, only alone. My husband died in 2002. But when he stole my wedding rings and sold them and I found them in a pawn shop, it was the limit. I could not deal with that loss. He had stole from me many times. It was that precious link to his father that put me over the edge. At that very time I called the police. Reported my rings stolen and had him picked up and charged with the theft. He was put on parole. I am not saying that was the end. We just went through a rough period where he left town and was awol with his probation. I reported him missing and they picked him up again. Believe me he did not like jail and it broke my heart to see him there. But, I also told him this time I will not visit you there. It is embarrassing to me and I am not going to do it. So, during that time he told his probation officer that he wanted to go to rehab. The judge put him into a state run facility and he just completed his 6 mo. and has been clean for 9 mo. I tell him every day I love him and I am proud that he has done this and bettered himself. My heart goes out to these parents. TOUGH LOVE is hard and they will tell you anything and steal what they have to get what they want.
 
April 14, 2009, 2:00 pm CDT

addict daughter

Hi I am Melynda. I reallty feel for this family. I was married to my husband Scott for 3 months Two weeks after coming home from our honeymoon I woke up at 3 in the morning to find my husband dead beside me in bed from drugs. Mostly pills and prescription drugs. He would take 50 or more at a time.Oh my God it is the worst feeling of helpless. I would love to talk to this girl and tell her she does not know that life is so precious. It took me over a year to get my life back to half way normal. I tried so hard to make him stop thinking if he LOVED me he would stop but he wouldn't. THey have to want to stop. He left a daughter by someone else that loved him with all her heart but that did not stop him. Its like they can not find peace with theirselves. I have gone through hell and back because of this. If I can help anybody to stop I will. I hope the girl gets help. It is hard and you don't know how someone until you have been there. Gog bless this family and Dr Phil for helping.MY husband was 45..how young
 
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