Topic : 06/12 Fighting Fair

Quote From: nu2barbara

Dr. Phil, I disagree with Mark needing to wake in the mornings and ask himself what he can do to make his wife's life better. I think it makes more sense for him to ask himself what he needs to do to make his childrens lives better, and she should be willing to except that as a loving wife. Life does not circle around just her.

Quote From: awsumsquirrel

I really don't feel that you are correct in what you are saying, mostly because I went to school with this man. I've watched their relationship over the past years and I've seen her cause hate and discontent with everyone around her if they tried to step in and stop the fighting she was intending for her husband. This man is a genuinely good man. He genuinely cares for his kids, and for her. BUT, he has been dealing with her 'outbreaks' for too long. I was happy to see that Dr. Phil called her out on everything she was doing wrong. She needed to hear it from someone that had some experience and counsel. Mark has come from a broken home. You have no idea what it means to him to have a complete family because he doesn't want the same struggles for his children as he and his brothers had to deal with. This band has been together since high school, since before she was ever in the picture. This is his life. She knew it when she met him. For the fact that they only play on the weekends, means there is 4-5 other days that can be considered family time. (Dinners together, games with the children, reading at bedtime to the children, then once the kids are asleep, couple time) He should never consider quitting the band because she can't stand seeing him go do something on his own that doesn't involve her. She should be proud that he is incredibly talented and gifted and that yes he is good looking and attracts women, but at the end of the day, he is all hers. He wouldn't have married her if he didn't feel something for her. I know him that well. She should be positive in her thinking in all aspects of her life. Hang on to the good and quit dwelling on the bad. I've watched that man completely ignore women throwing themselves at him. He is not the creature she was trying to make the nation see. She should be happy that someone is giving the effort to stay with her crazy self. She needs to seek serious help and get her mind in order. Once she does that, she will find the rest will fall into place. Including her husband and a great family.

Quote From: speakingup

When I saw Leana and Mark fighting, I thought "who cares if a couple of immature, spoiled people make each other and themselves miserable?"  Then I saw that they are behaving like this in front of their children.  Absolutely disgusting.  The 7-year old boy is more mature and wiser than either of them.  If they behave like this when they know they are being filmed, what happens when the cameras are off?  Their behavior is inexcusable.  I feel so sorry for the kids.  The adults know better and could behave better if they cared to do so.  People who have such little control should never have bred.

Quote From: michelleluman

Hello all!
Okay, this wife is a real piece of work. Now I am not in their house, but I have a very good idea of what is going on. She most likely CHOSE to stay at home with the kids, not to work. Then her husband goes to work and supports his household, she complains. He is tired from working all the time, and music is a passion of his. She complains yet again. I bet that when they met she was all into his music, most likely she was hoping he would make it, have lots of money rolling in. (This is just my "guess").
Now, she is wrong for holding the children over his head. It is obvious that he loves those kids, and wants to be around them. If you ask me, which I know you did not, she is a horrible wife, and possibly not a great mother. Does she realize what she is doing to the kids? Does she know how much she is destroying them? She might or might not. If she does, it is obvious that she does not care. Why would you yell and cuss in front of (and holding) your children? You are just trying to hurt each other, and you should stop. Ask yourselves, "Do you love your partner?" Honestly answer the question. If you have to think about, chances are you do not. I honesty believe that you two will end in divorce. Is that what you want? If so, go for it. One thing I can tell you NOT to do, is stay together for the children. I understand that you do not want your kids in a "broken home", but do you really think that they would be happy with you two together, fighting all the time? No, they will not. There are worse things out there than coming from a "broken home".
Okay, now I have a few things I want to say about the wife. I am guessing (I did not catch all of the show, sorry Dr. Phil) that she has been hurt in some way, either as a child or in a previous relationship. Maybe her dad was not around, or maybe an ex hurt her. That could be why she is lashing out at her husband. IF this is true, she needs to do some personal soul searching. Maybe she does not know who she is, or maybe she is just an unhappy person. I don't know, I'm not a doctor, so I can't be sure.
Okay husband it's your turn! Don't stop playing your music. If you are anything like my fiance, you LOVE your music! Don't stop. She accepted it when you first got together, so why does she not accept it now? She chose the life she has, she needs to live it. Maybe you two should try and find a babysitter, and she can go and watch you play. Maybe this will "spark" an old flame, maybe. I also think it is great that you want to spend time with the kids, she should never stop you from doing this. One other thing, I'm not sure if she has done this yet or not, but if she has not, she might do it.: tell you the kids are not yours (which they might not be I don't know), tell you she cheats, threatens to go back to an ex, threaten to take the kids and you will never see them. Now like I said before, I was not able to catch the entire show. So those things might go on now.
Alright guys, I know what you might be thinking. Who are you to say all of these things? You are not perfect you know. If so, you are right. I'm not perfect. I am guilty of trying to hurt my fiance in our first year together. When we would fight, I would lash out and try to "win". I know that I was wrong, and I almost lost my soul mate. Now when we fight (which we hardly do), we end it in laughter. He is always right! Do you have any idea how annoying that is? But it is okay, I love him and I have learner to listen to him.
I am thirty years old, but my head is still screwed up from things that happened in my house when I was a child. I lived with my mom at the time, and you have no idea what kind of things I saw, and went through. I know I have problems, and I am working on them. So, (wife) look into yourself. Did you go through something? If so, please get help. I promise you will be a happier person.
Okay, I'm stepping off of my soap box now. I hope you all have a great day!!!
Oh, Dr. Phil....you are way too many commercials during your show. I realize you have to pay bills, but man...that's alot of commercials.....