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Topic : 02/11 Octuplets Debate

Number of Replies: 461
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Created on : Friday, February 06, 2009, 02:13:19 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
For most single mothers, one child is enough of a handful, but when a 33-year-old woman in Southern California gave birth to eight premature babies -– in addition to the six children under the age of 8 she already has -- the country started talking! The mother of 14, Nadya, is keeping a low profile, but it is reported that all her children were created through in-vitro fertilization, an expensive and purposeful process. Questions are cropping up: How did she end up with eight embryos? How will she care for all of them? Who will pay these children’s expenses over the years? How do we take the children’s well-being into account in reproductive medicine? Dr. Phil and his panel of esteemed guests, including Dr. Jim Sears co-host of The Doctors, debate the ethical questions that have been raised. Share your thoughts, join the discussion.

Find out what happened on the show.

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February 11, 2009, 12:52 pm CST

sperm donor

when are we going to hear that the sperm donor is going to be held accoutable?  This guy has 14 kids that we know of that he is not supporting. Where is the outrage over this?
 
February 11, 2009, 12:53 pm CST

Her Doctor needs his head examined!!!!!

Ms. Suleman appears to be an emotionally troubled woman who has chosen to become a single mother under questionable circumstances.

She is single, (not a negative if she were independantly wealthy) Unemployed and already has 6 children under 7 years old, 3 of whom have special needs and it does not appear that she has a significant support system in place to assist her.

She chose to be impregnated with more embryo's than sanity and safety should allow, and after seeing her recent TV interview, I would question her ability to provide stable parenting for even 1 child!

 

The fertility Doctor or Doctors who took her on as a patient are guilty of gross medical misconduct. The same way that an ethical plastic surgeon should refuse to operate on women with emotional issues who want to undergo multiple un-neccessary cosmetic surgeries, these Doctors should have done an intensive screening of this woman. Including the questions:

 

What preparation has been made for additional children with special needs?

What happens to these children if something happens to the mother?

How are you going to complete school with 14 children demanding your attention?

What job do you expect to get that will cover even the most basic child care expenses while you work?

 

This fertility doctor assisted her in getting pregnant with a high risk multiple pregnancy that put both mother and babies in potential danger. This situation could have had a tragic ending babies could have died, possibly even the mother herself. Not to mention the potention for disabilities.

I think the oath that Doctors take is, "First do no harm". Implanting embryo's in larger numbers than generally accepted guidelines, is creating an enviroment for tragedy. The risk to these infants both in the womb and as premature births was enormous, maybe the mother is crazy, but the Doctor should have been the voice of reason in the situation. There was talk that she lied to the doctor about prior pregnancies, that is ridiculous because any competant doctor could determine via examination that she had given birth before, and should have enquired about whether those pregnancies were successful in order to do risk assessment for ANY procedure.

 

I was hoping somebody could look into whether this constitutes medical malpractice?

Perhaps the Doctor should pay child support!

 

The sperm donor is supposedly a friend, and I would say to him just as "friends do not let friends drive drunk", friends do not enable reckless behavior. A real friend would have a sit down heart to heart about the practicalities before allowing this emotionally troubled person to bring forth his progeny!!

 

This woman has not done too much rational thinking, but I am more outraged by the lack of rational thoughts in those around her.

 

Three of her older children have special needs all this women's financial and emotional resources should be available to them in order to ensure maximum development potential. Not only is she now going to have to spread her meager resources amongst 14, she may well have more special needs infants among the newborns!!

 

This whole situation is extremely sad, but also, in my opinion verging on child neglect and abuse regardless of her good intentions she cannot possibly give all 14 the care and nurturing they need when it is obvious she is in desperate need of care and nurturing herself.

 

Had she applied to adopt a child instead of IVF, with her circumstances, the intense screening that adoptive parents endure would have labeled her as an "unsuitable" candidate.

 

Perhaps if her Doctor had shown even a little bit of diligence in his screening process, she might now be receiving much needed counselling instead of being in charge of 14 under 7's.

 
February 11, 2009, 12:53 pm CST

single moms

It is fine for someone to chose to be a single mom; however, to chose to have multiple births due to wanting siblings for a child, because you had none, changes minds as to the mother's mental stabililty.  It is fine to make choices, no one can debate that; however, once the choice is made, you should be able to supply emotional, mental, physical, spiritual and financial responsibility for every CHOICE you make.  Presently, I am waiting for the "publicist" to start begging for donations to build a new house, take care of all the children and provide baby sitting for this mother to return to school...and who takes care of the FAMILY then??????  The grandparents are worn out, while the mother does the rounds on TV and appears rested, nails manicured and clueless except for her belief in God.  Place these children in homes where someone can provide for them independently and without the government's backing.  Clearly, this situation should not be condoned to others.  If you are going to mother a child, have the father help you.
 
February 11, 2009, 12:54 pm CST

Octuplets

Let's see, she was on disability for a back injury, yet was able to carry octuplets. She used her disability money to fund in-vitro and student loan money for her children's daily needs. At the very least this woman is guilty of fraud. Student loans are for students and having had back surgery going through pregnancy with one was extremely difficult. Taking money away from her children to pay for additional in-vitro is the ultimate in selfishness. Now she has a publicist pleading her case and trying to convince all of that she really didn't know that all of the implanted embryos would develop all while trying to cojole American companies and the American public into providing for this woman. If you can not support financially, mentally and physically all that are born to you then DON"T HAVE THEM
 
February 11, 2009, 12:54 pm CST

02/11 Octuplets Debate

Quote From: chel39

THIS WOMAN  GOT WHAT SHE WANTED, EVERYONE TO TALK ABOUT HER AND SHOWS TO PAY MONEY TO SPEAK WITH HER.  JUST GOES TO SHOW SHES  GOOD AT PLAYING THE SYSTEM. AT HER AGE SHES PROVED SHES IRRESPONSIBLE, SELFISH AND HAS NO COMMON SENSE. SHE HAD NO BUSINESS HAVING MORE CHILDREN WHEN SHE ALREADY HAD  6 SMALL CHILDREN AT HOME. AND FOR PEOPLE TO SAY ITS NO ONES BUSINESS, SHE MADE IT EVERYONES BUSINESS BY HAVING THE "NEWS REPORTERS" AT THE HOSPITAL AFTER THE BIRTH. SHE KNEW EXACTLY WHAT SHE WAS DOING, GIVE IT TIME SHE WILL DO IT AGAIN  AND WE WILL SEE HER NAME POP BACK UP IN THE NEWS. 

You are so right, selfish unbalanced woman and greedy physician, both exploiting these children for financial gain.
 
February 11, 2009, 12:55 pm CST

Octuplet debate

Dr. Phil

 

The thing that I'm very confused about that woman is this:

 

What she going to tell those 8 kids when they all grow up if they ask these questions :

 

Mom who is our daddy ?  Mom where is daddy ? or Mom why I don't have a father like any other kids ?

 

Those are questions that she will be facing in the future what is she going to tell them:

 

You father is a tube with a big needle at the end !!!!!!  

 

To me that woman was manipulated by the doctor who wanted to get famous but it turned out wrong for him and he don't know what to do anymore.

 
February 11, 2009, 12:58 pm CST

Octuplet Shock!

Oh my goodness! I am in shock over the whole octuplet decision. I think that so many people are at fault here, but the children are here now.  Yes, I think that if we don't help this young woman the children will suffer as well.  However, I am afraid of the what message we will be sending not only to this young woman, but all young woman around the world!  This young woman will need help for the rest of these children's lives! I think it was very irresponsible on her part, to put herself in this situation, and with the economy being the way that it is this situation puts an already strain on the state of California and tax payers.  There are people who need assistance, because they are in situations that were totally out of their control, such as being laid off.  However, this young woman made a decision, not a conscious one, and now we all we have to pay.  I think this young woman needs psychiatric help, and unfortunately as a nation we will have to assist, and that in itself is a tragedy.  Also, the kids will never get the love and attention that they need on an individual bases.  This was a very selfish act, that we will all pay for from now on.
 
February 11, 2009, 12:59 pm CST

Standards

though not mandatory it is advisable to put only two embryos back. I have done oodles of research most clinics frown even on three being transferred back. this home is not fit to have the children. It's time for child services to step in. I mean really, let's take the "miracle birth" out of the scenario, let's say the neighbor has 14 kids under 7 years of age in a 3 bedroom house and no job. If the children's best interest really are at the forefront they simply must go to several homes so that they can get the individual care and love they deserve. This case makes me so deeply angry I don't think I can even look at it anymore!
 
February 11, 2009, 1:02 pm CST

Octomom and Kate of J&K plus 8 -- TRUTH!

Dr Phil!!!!!
Do your research man!!!!!

 

You have Kate Gosslein on talking about being responsible about this topic?

 

Research how she ended up with sextuplets -- all the facts point to the fact that she IGNORED their doctors orders and purposely increased her chances of upping the number of children she would have in her procedure.  She did nearly EXACTLY what octomom did.  But in her case -- even worse -- she went AGAINST the doctor's orders!!!!!! 

 

Also -- this is a perfect example of how dysfunctional the octomom's family may become.

 

WATCH THEIR SHOW!  She is horrible to her husband, he ends up taking it out on the children and they all end up screaming -- yes!!  they show it on TV -- the SCREAM at each other.

It is so sad and disturbing.

 

Also -- they have alienated nearly all members of their OWN BLOOD family -- and now even their friends -- so they apparantly have NONE left.

 

Dr. Phil -- do you ever watch these people on TV?

 

I used to -- when everyone appeared innocent and cute and wholesome -- but they have grown into a disturbing, unhappy brood and I can no longer watch.  It literally upsets me almost physically -- because of those poor little children and how they are being treated and put on public display and how the behaviour is only growing worse.  And that woman -- Kate -- is a shrieking, troubled woman.  I cannot even watch the show anymore, but now other more mainstream shows are starting to make fun of this sad, sad family.

 

Dr. Phil -- use the Christian, loving and CALM Duggar family (they are also on TLC) -- they have

18 children and you never once see that woman/mother be a shrill, scary, shrieking woman.  Far, far better example of how to raise a well-adjusted, happy family -- if that was your point on the show.

 

Also, the Duggars make their own money -- while the Gossleins' make it off the backs of their children -- big difference if you're trying to make a point of how to pay for the kids expenses.  The G's could not -- so they have sold out and soley make money off their kids -- and that's EXACTLY what the octomom is being accused of.  And why not?  She sees the G's do it -- they make NO MONEY except off their children.

Octomom is ONLY following in the Gosslein's footsteps -- make money off the children -- not on their own.

 

And if you watch the show -- you will see the horrific results.

 

BAD EXAMPLE!

 

I'm soooo disappointed in you Dr. Phil -- you are NOT doing your job of selecting the right people to properly talk about this situation.

You had me all the way up until you introduced Kate Gosslein -- and then it was all downhill -- because she has done exactly what octomom is accused of doing -- except worse!  At least the G's doctors advised them properly -- and this woman went home and did exactly what she was told NOT to do.

 

Please quit giving these irresponsible and frightening parents airtime (unless  you are hoping to do a show in the future of how these kids grow up so disturbed because of how their parents treat them like commodities -- or unless you are planning to do an intervention -- hopefully to prevent that from happening).

But to use this irresponsible and scary, scary woman on tv as an "example" is extremely irresponsible and shows you clearly DO NOT do proper research on your guests.

 

Thank you for letting me have my say -- and I do agree -- we need to be concerned for well-being of octomom's little children.  That is now and should be of top concern.  I will pray for them.

 
February 11, 2009, 1:03 pm CST

how dare

how can you ask people to help the mother of 16 children?  she already had six children then went to have more when she has no way of taking care of the kids she already had.  how can anyone feel bad for her when she done this to herself.  she should get No help. 
 
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