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Topic : 04/16 Scary Trends: Is Your Child at Risk?

Number of Replies: 71
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Created on : Thursday, April 09, 2009, 06:17:25 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
Parents, this show is appointment television! Sexting, a scary new trend where teens send nude or semi-nude photos via cell phone, is popping up throughout the country. But what kids don't realize is that this seemingly innocent act could change their lives forever. Julia recently learned that her 13-year-old daughter texted a provocative photo of herself to a boy, and he forwarded it to his friends. The situation spiraled out of control and nearly ended in tragedy. Find out why Julia says she overreacted, and learn how to approach this situation if it strikes your family. Then, Dr. Phil talks one on one with the teen. Will his words give her a new outlook on the situation? Next, Ben, 14, was threatened with charges after sending a naked photo on his cell phone. Should teens be arrested for sexting? Attorney Lisa Bloom, In Session anchor and special correspondent for BettyConfidential.com, shares her thoughts. You may be surprised to hear what she says. If you're a parent who wants to monitor your kid's cell phone and computer activity, don’t miss the newest ways to stay one step ahead of the trends. Join the discussion.

Find out what happened on the show.

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April 16, 2009, 12:57 pm CDT

Sexting

I do agree that these children have made mistakes and thats all apart of growing up, but I do feel like the boys are the ones that get the raw deal here. Parents of girls please parent your girls better & teach them to dress age appropriately and respect themselves. 

 
April 16, 2009, 1:14 pm CDT

im so upset

this show made me so mad i wanted to jump through the tv.  i am 34 years old and i am a mother of 3 boys, my twins are 13 and my youngest is 12 and they all three are boys.  The comment about boys being the problem and girls are victims is way wrong.  Its the girls and boys fault.  even if a boy tells the girl to take a nude pic of her the boy is not holding a gun to her head to do it, she has her own mind and makes her own decission.  I feel this is a problem but it is not more wrong for one sex then the other.  These girls are smarter than they let on they know what will happen if they send these pics to boys, come on get with the program.
 
April 16, 2009, 1:17 pm CDT

Reality Check

Sorry but this really tends to yank my chain when people talk of inequality. I am uber in that aspect. Females are not victims. You need to get rid of that old world mentality and embrace equality. If she sent the picture despite any reason and I can see some in the matter and it just blew up in her face (it happens we all know it does despite the best of intentions) that does not make her a victim so stop portraying her as one. Victim this, victim that. All the guys fault (hold up I am getting to them) that is the biggest sexist mentality there is. And yes it is sexist you can argue that it isn't all day but at the end it still will be. (Defined as: pertaining to, involving, or fostering sexism: a sexist remark; sexist advertising. and Sexism is defined as: attitudes or behavior based on traditional stereotypes of sexual roles. Tada it is sexist behavior Dictionary.com for reference) Culpability it is.


Now in all equality what the hell are they doing sending pictures. I don't care if it is a "guy thing" (Sexist remark). First that is not harassment as it would fall under media usage rights. It isn't a copy righted image and thus when sent is public domain. That said it is called class. This is what happens when you isolate your kids from reality and don't teach them manners and respect. You can't blame the boys that received the picture unless he asked for it. That is unfair and would technically mean you can blame anyone for anything that isn't their fault but the pictures should be deleted and everyone needs to move on with their lives. Reprimanding are needed on all sides.

 

On the mothers end. I will not lie to you. You failed in the moment. People will sugar coat the reality all they want but you still didn't succeed. But hey don't feel bad. Live, Learn, Grow. I failed 3 times today in a matter of 2 minutes. Could have been 4 or 5. Credit card wasn't working when I was trying to pay for groceries. Everyone fails it is part of life. Pick up the peaces and move on. Do you know how many business ventures I have failed at. Well fail is kinda harsh but I sure didn't succeed so technically I did fail, but I walked away with new knowledge. It can be said that the only time you ever truly fail (which is an absolute 100 % fail) is when you don't learn anything. As long as you walk away with something you learned something and in that aspect have succeeded.

 

Though this is a good example of how ignorance is not bliss it is just ignorance (not my quote). Stuff hits home. Though I have to say I am becoming quite shocked at the level of stupidity lately. Anyone else with me on that. Smarties (I have a blog post for that), sexting, god knows how many other trends. It seems people are just loosing their minds lately.

 

There is nothing wrong with being ashamed of a person. It is human nature nor is it bad to let someone know. Though I think it would have been better if she would have let her child know that she still loved her. Shame and lack of love are two different things.

 

Is it the harsh reality yeah. I am though a pleasant person (debatable :)) who my friends can come to for help.

 
April 16, 2009, 1:19 pm CDT

04/16 Scary Trends: Is Your Child at Risk?

What happened to this young girl being held responsible for sending that picture in the first place? If she's sending it, then.........well..........it's probably gonna be passed around. She KNEW that! What happened to Dr. Phil having people accept responsibility for their own actions? He always says that once a something goes into cyberspace, by internet OR text, it can end up anywhere, and it doesn't discriminate for age, race or sex. Yes, this young boy was insensitive in doing this, but c'mon she wasn't TOO worried about anyone being "insensitive" to her feelings when she did this. If she did she would NEVER have sent it.
 
April 16, 2009, 1:27 pm CDT

04/16 Scary Trends: Is Your Child at Risk?

come on folks -- if it is ok for teen is it ok for adult men too??  maybe we should throw out all porn laws?  I don't think so!!  This is illegal and should be punished like any other illegal activity -- theft by teens should be ok -- driving over speed limit should be ok because it is just a kid after all -- CRAP
 
April 16, 2009, 1:35 pm CDT

sexting

i am watching this show as a mother of both a 15 year old boy and 12 1/2 year old girl. as parents my husband and i have expressed to both of them of the terrible outcome of doing something like this. BOYS CAN NOT take raw end of the deal here as the bad guy. both girls and boys need to be taught to respect themselves and TAKE RESPONSIBILTY FOR THEIR OWN ACTIONS without blaming it on someone else. she should have never taken the photo and sent it out! that boy did the same thing just about any teenager in america regardless of being male or female more then likey would have done. kids can be are immature and make bad decisions.its a learning process. keep your clothes on kids and put the camera away!!!!!!!

 
April 16, 2009, 1:49 pm CDT

kids will be kids

My friends daughter did the exact same thing as the young lady on the show.  The boy sent it to others and it got back to the office at school.  This happened before sextexting became a big deal.  She was punished by her mother and we actually laugh about it now. 

I was taken aback at the mothers reaction on the show.  I couldn't believe the things that she said.  I have all boys and one girl.  She is 22 and from the time she was 14, I've explained that boys will say and do anything to get you to sleep with them or just get you to do something you don't want to do.  I'm very direct and outspoken.  She understood and there hasn't been a problem.  I have spoken with the boys and told them that women are to be treated with the respect they give me.  There hasn't been a problem.

 

Lastly, when I was 13 we didn't have cell phones so we had to flash the ones that wanted to see and we did.  The point is: KIDS DO STUPID THINGS....They need to be grounded, paddled, or whatever punishment you mete out but they do not need to be labeled SEX OFFENDERS!

 
April 16, 2009, 1:56 pm CDT

04/16 Scary Trends: Is Your Child at Risk?

Right now I'm relieved my daughter is not a teen.  I know she'll grow up with the same pressure, and one day I'll have a teen tempted to demean herself for the negative attention of her peers.

 

Hopefully every single broadcasting outlet can get together and refuse to accept sexually demeaning advertising.  Yeah Right!

 

I have been talking to my daughter for awhile about how important it is to be a lady and love yourself more than anyone's opinion.  Their opinions are flawed if they expect you to change you to meet their lower expectations.  The true popularity contest is won by holding your head above the crowd and commanding respect.

 

Have a show about that Dr. Phil! 

 
April 16, 2009, 1:57 pm CDT

Let's Teach Our Kids!

This show is a perfect example of how our kids are now so de-sensitized to nudity and immoral behavior. They see this stuff on TV and in the media and it's to the point that they just think its another photo.  In the case of the 13 year old boy...where's the respect for young women? I would never want one of my daughters to date a young man who would forward something like this. In the case of the girls...WHO'S TAKING THESE PICTURES????  Where is their self respect? Where is the respect for their fellow classmates to whom they send this trash??  Where are the parents and their teaching? Note to parents...pick up your childs cell phone...read their text messages, look at who is in their contact list...HELLO! These kids are underage and do not have the maturity to handle the privacy and responsibilty they are given these days.  Parents are not watching this area of their childrens lives close enough!
 
April 16, 2009, 1:58 pm CDT

Peer pressure

Quote From: wnymom

I disagree with the tone that this show takes towards teen boys and that somehow they should be held to a higher standard than the young girls sending the photos.  If teens are able to understand the use of cell phones, text messaging, and taking & sending photos, then certainly they are old enough and wise enough to understand what is and isn't appropriate in regards to messages and photos they send.

 

YES boys should be held responsible for their actions AS SHOULD GIRLS.  It is ridiculous to allow girls off the hook because a boy "pressured" them to send a nude photo and, poor thing, felt compelled to oblige.  We've come farther as women than this -- have some respect for yourselves girls and say no and let these young men know that you don't respond to their type.  For girls and their parents to lay blame only at the "askers" feet is RIDICULOUS.  Take responsibility for your actions -- either DON'T send the photo or message, or take responsibility when you do.  If you're old enough to bare all, take a photo of it, and then forward it, you're old enough to take responsibility for your actions.

 

Boys should not be let off the hook with this -- but neither should girls.  This is no longer a "new" dilemma -- it's been happening for a few years now and these teens are smarter than we are as parents when it comes to what is happening.  Certainly ANY teen with a cell phone knows that it is not appropriate to take a nude photo or yourself or much less, send it to somebody else....same goes for a text that is sexual in nature.  It is not a matter of being found out "if" somebody sends it along, but just a matter of when they do and how many they send it to. 

I couldn't have said it any better, myself.  Girl's need to be held responsible for sending the photo/message, as boys need to be held responsible for entising them to do so.  I'm 28, so I've officially graduated to "old school" thank you Jesus, but I can't understand why these girls don't think about the fact that everyone they send the content to, is forwarding it to others with every intention to sabitage their self esteem, character, reputation as well as many other things that determine who they are as an individual.  I think these girls are much smarter than they let theirself believe, but they have a serious amout of insecurity and are trying to find it in their peers.  Unfortunately, their peers have ulterior motives and want nothing more than to see how far these girls are willing to go to become "accepted." I hate to say it but they're failing, miserably.
 
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