Topic : 08/03 Dump Your Dreams?

 I understand that the husband pursuing his music dream needs to put things in perspective and provide for his family.  What  about his wife, to me it look like she is well taken care of.  Her nails are done, her hair is done and they are living in expensive house.  What about asking her to give up that.  It goes both ways, if neither hobby can be afforded then put a stop to both and  live below your means.  Being a stay at home mom and having our own business you do what you have to do to live and sometimes that means giving things up.  I wish Dr. Phil would have addressed that issue as well. 

I just have to comment on today's topic.  My son is an extremely talented musician; he took lessons for one year from Roberta Flack's guitarist who told us he couldn't teach him any more...he had a natural talent and could read music like any of us read a novel.  Mike would have loved, more than anything, to have found a career as a musician but LIFE got in the way and he voluntarily assumed its responsibilities.  He was married at 19; a father at 20, two more children before he was 25.  When his youngest was less than a year old, his wife was diagnosed with MS.  I know that most 25 year-olds would have turned tail and run if theyhad found out, after 3 kids, that the wife was diagnosed with MS andthat, ultimately, all responsibilities would fall on them.  My sonstood by his vows, took care of his wife, worked full timeand still came home to care for his children.  Thankfully, she was able to receive a new drug that has slowed the progression of the disease dramatically but she chose to "milk it".   Even before her illness, he never wanted her to work; said he didn't care if they ate beans and weinies, he wanted her to be with their children. Unfortunately, the disease, her selfishness and her very violent temper caused the marriage to fail.  He walked on eggshells for 16 years and did everything in his power to keep the marriage together, including his dream of being a professional musician.  When he told the children that he and their mother were getting a divorce, they applauded him and said "it's about time."  Since the divorce, he has met and married a wonderful woman who fully supports him and his music.  He continues to work full-time and now plays in a band part-time.  He has the best of both worlds.  I am so proud of him and the man he has become.  The first marriage destroyed his spirit but now he has someone who loves him unconditionally, has restored his spirit and supports everything he does.  These dreamers who were on the show today are also losers.  Every one of those so-called men need to grow up and be the man their mothers raised them to be.

It really burns me up that an able-bodied man who's too lazy to do real work would take charity out of the hands of someone physically unable to work. And, it is unconscionable of Dr Phil to overlook this rip-off. Especially when charities have less money than ever to divide among more truly needy people than ever.
















 and

Dr. Phil has been a real solid for me. I am grateful for that. I too have dreams. I took one of his pieces of advice literally...he asked one of his guests pointedly (in a show several years ago) if they had exhausted all of their opportunities within their community before moving on to bigger and better things. I am happy to say that I have almost graduated from my local University with a BA in two subjects, and I will be applying to grad school this next year, which is my bigger and better things. Also, I am 43 this month.

 

For me, the obstacles are all about keeping it real. In today's show, I think the most important point discussed was how important it is to keep one's home in order, by being responsible. After living so many years trying to 'make it' and being in poverty, with the belief of entitlement like I had to do certain things, like study in the National Gallery in London in order to advance my career. While that opportunity was worthwhile, it was unrealistic, in terms of finances.

 

So much in my life has blossomed as a result of taking care of my basic needs. I would love to spend everyday in my studio, but that isn't realistic. I understand that now. And I think the quality of what I do do in the studio (I am a visual artist) has greatly improved by taking care of the space between me and the outside world.

 

 

Thank you for saything this.  I agree with your 100%.  A church organization is supposed to help those that truely need help not to help those that are too lazy.  Really sad that he took advantage of an organization so he can spend money on a piece of a equipment.  Charities need help as much as it is and for a lazy able body man to take money for them is disgraceful, he is not a man but a boy.  He needs to grow up, you can still pursue your dreams.  But when you have children you have to make sure they have full bellies, and a roof over their heads before you buy toys.  Dr. Phil yelled at her more about talking about probs in front of the kids, I'm not condoing it, but taking advantage of a charity is just as bad.

This disinclines me from giving to charities, the suspician that those who really need help aren`t the ones getting it.

Shame on dr phil for overlooking this man`s taking advantage of his church`s charity. Arguing in front of children isn`t good, but neither is ripping off a church.

Hi Dan and Jay,

 

I understand that you to be famous... My dream started when I was 15... I fell in love with cirque du soleil's Mystere a resident show in Las Vegas... Snice then I've been singing and acting... Yes, you still have your dream to achevie whenever you at any age... I started at 18 and will still continue to take the class that I need until I garduate form college... I had a friend who was a waiter before I started singing and touring with cirque du soleil's Quidam from 1998 - 2003... Then with Varekai 2003 and present... Yes, he tours with his wife and daugther which they love and support him... It's always to have a A and a B plan... Don't worry you make your dreams happen keep work at it... I garutee that you'll both make it somday...

... thank you for your encouragment!! -dan

... I value Mr. Fosters opinion!! - I truly do!! but more important to me are the opinions of regular ordinary people. Please look me up on myspace - dan taulbee and let me know what you think of my music. This message board has you voting without hearing any of my work but just little tidbits.... thank you for your input - I'm humbled by this experience. It's been good for me, but at the same time... I'm more determined than ever.