Message Boards

Topic : 08/18 'Fighting for My Children'

Number of Replies: 106
New Messages This Week: 0
Last Reply On:
Created on : Friday, August 12, 2005, 06:24:59 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1

(Original air date 05/17/05) Dr. Phil sheds light on two custody battles cases that have captured national attention and left the children caught in the crossfire. Michael, Linda and their two kids seemed to be the typical American family, but when the marriage started to crumble, the fight for custody ended up on Court TV. Why did Linda lose her kids to a man who's not their biological father, and is Michael an unfit parent because he used to be a woman? Then, model Bridget Marks made headlines when she was forced to hand over her twin daughters to their father. Tune in for her dramatic update and join the discussion.

 

Find out what happened on the show.

 

Read previous messages in the archived discussion.


As of January, 2009, this message board will become "Read Only" and will be closed to further posting. Please join the NEW Dr. Phil Community to continue your discussions, personalize your message board experience, start a blog and meet new friends.

August 18, 2005, 6:52 pm CDT

jadaok

Quote From: jadaok

If she hadn't been up in this married man's face behind his wife's back she wouldn't have to be in a crowd. You want to talk about the safety of a kid.The fathercould go around the corner and buckle the kids in, outside the camera's surrounding Brigetts staged drama performance after she lost custody. How safe are they with her, when a court found that she and her mother lied about the twins being sexually abused by their father. You don't think that's a safety issue up there with seat belts? Besides those big kids should have been getting in and buckling themselves in their seatbelts. That's what most decent mother's teach their kids from birth. Now to address the rest of your post, how do we know that the father denied the kid's from going to church, or wouldn't let them talk to their mother, and really he had, had this woman in the most intimate way, what's the likely truth? She slept with the married man, got pregnant because he was rich, then got pissed because he wouldn't leave his wife and make her a trophy wife with new babies. This is a woman who was a mistress and now you and Dr. Phil think she's a respectable and credible woman? Hello????? Was she going to church when she was with the married man trying to get pregnant so he'd leave his wife? Maybe the cheating baby daddy is too guilty to go to church. This woman pulled out all the stunts, to get her way and you bought it. I thought it was laughable when she said that a man she was fooling around with for years wanted to marry her, but suddenly after she had her twins she suddenly fell out of lust with him and wanted to leave? When this father does speak out, I bet a bunch of people will see that mistresses are coniving, sneaky, and selfish.

I'm not letting the father off, but to lie about a kid being molested because you're about to loose custody, that's one of the lowest and cruelest things a mother can do. Those kids will be scarred forever because of this fact that was proven in court to be true.

One day we'll learn that you can't believe everything that comes out of a woman's mouth just because she is a woman.

In closing if she hadn't been fooling around with a married man she wouldn't be in this situation.

Wonder how much money Bridgett will rake in on that double child support, that she'll likely use to support herself.

I hope the father takes her back to court and gets those girls back. They'd be better raised by a nanny than this vindictive woman. If she weren't a pretty model, no one would have even noticed this mistresses story.

WHATEVER!!! she left him because of abuse to her and was also treaten by him if she did he would take the kids from her exactly what he did hired the most expensive lawyer and went to court and took the kids.As far as her going with a married man yes she did and it takes two to have an affair.as far as i know about the church and not letting her talk to her kids,watch the second part .
 
August 18, 2005, 7:05 pm CDT

PAS IS Junk Science

Quote From: nashdad

I am a Dad of three boys ages 10, 8 & 3.  I have spent the last 19 months without my boys.  These two people today...representing themselves as mother and father of their children...truly depicts the senerio I face continually in the courts of Tennessee and my former spouse.  

   

My former spouse has falsely accused me and has continually committed Parental Alienation Syndrome with respect with my three boys since November 30, 2003.  

   

I haven't heard the entire story of today's case, but I will say...I take the same sentiments this father is taking....I will never quit fighting the legal battle the courts raise and my former spouse raises!  

   

   

Sincerely...a father missing his three boys in Tennessee,  

   

Timothy B. Ray 

   

If you would do your research you would find that PAS is junk science and not recognized by reputable doctors. The APA speaks out about PAS and there are numerous websites with quotes attributed to people who believe in PAS. They believe it is okay to touch their children to help release frustrations. And I do not mean hugging or normal parent/child touches. And I am not talking about normal frustration either. And lastly most men who claim PAS is being committed are abusers. Whether they are abusive to their wives or the children is a mute point - the point is they are abusive. When the courts relize this and throw out PAS as a defense for fathers to rip children out of their mothers arms as another tactic of abuse, the family unit will stabilize. When the money is taken out of divorces and when people are required to get couples counselling before they marry, the family unit will survive. When the court systems are ready to recognize the lengths an abuser will go to, this country will be a better place for children.
 
August 18, 2005, 7:12 pm CDT

HUH?

Quote From: jadaok

If she hadn't been up in this married man's face behind his wife's back she wouldn't have to be in a crowd.  You want to talk about the safety of a kid.  The father could go around the corner and buckle the kids in, outside the camera's surrounding Brigetts staged drama performance after she lost custody.  How safe are they with her, when a court found that she and her mother lied about the twins being sexually abused by their father.  You don't think that's a safety issue up there with seat belts?  Besides those big kids should have been getting in and buckling themselves in their seatbelts.  That's what most decent mother's teach their kids from birth.   Now to address the rest of your post, how do we know that the father denied the kid's from going to church, or wouldn't let them talk to their mother, and really he had, had this woman in the most intimate way, what's the likely truth?  She slept with the married man, got pregnant because he was rich, then got pissed because he wouldn't leave his wife and make her a trophy wife with new babies.  This is a woman who was a mistress and now you and Dr. Phil think she's a respectable and credible woman?  Hello?????  Was she going to church when she was with the married man trying to get pregnant so he'd leave his wife?  Maybe the cheating baby daddy is too guilty to go to church.  This woman pulled out all the stunts, to get her way and you bought it.  I thought it was laughable when she said that a man she was fooling around with for years wanted to marry her, but suddenly after she had her twins she suddenly fell out of lust with him and wanted to leave?  When this father does speak out, I bet a bunch of people will see that mistresses are coniving, sneaky, and selfish.  

   I'm not letting the father off, but to lie about a kid being molested because you're about to loose custody, that's one of the lowest and cruelest things a mother can do.  Those kids will be scarred forever because of this fact that was proven in court to be true.  

    One day we'll learn that you can't believe everything that comes out of a woman's mouth just because she is a woman.   

   In closing if she hadn't been fooling around with a married man she wouldn't be in this situation.    

   Wonder how much money Bridgett will rake in on that double child support, that she'll likely use to support herself.  

    I hope the father takes her back to court and gets those girls back.  They'd be better raised by a nanny than this vindictive woman.  If she weren't a pretty model, no one would have even noticed this mistresses story.  

Since when does it only take one to make a child? And why is it all the woman's fault? And because she was "messing with a married man" does that mean she deserves to lose her children? And just because she is a woman does that mean we should not believe her? These are some of the most arcane statements I have ever read. Maybe we all need to go back in time to the 18th century when women were property and we had no minds and men could beat us and not be punished. Oh yeah that is the answer...... NOT!!!!! Because some appear to think women should be seen and not heard does not mean we will go away. We give life to children and nurture them in their tender years only to have a male judge and male attornies say we cannot provide for our children? Bah Humbug.
 
August 18, 2005, 7:17 pm CDT

PAS Creator

Quote From: mom2pagkid

If you would do your research you would find that PAS is junk science and not recognized by reputable doctors. The APA speaks out about PAS and there are numerous websites with quotes attributed to people who believe in PAS. They believe it is okay to touch their children to help release frustrations. And I do not mean hugging or normal parent/child touches. And I am not talking about normal frustration either. And lastly most men who claim PAS is being committed are abusers. Whether they are abusive to their wives or the children is a mute point - the point is they are abusive. When the courts relize this and throw out PAS as a defense for fathers to rip children out of their mothers arms as another tactic of abuse, the family unit will stabilize. When the money is taken out of divorces and when people are required to get couples counselling before they marry, the family unit will survive. When the court systems are ready to recognize the lengths an abuser will go to, this country will be a better place for children.
And one last thing -- the man who is responsible for creating PAS is now dead. And why you may ask? He was found with numerous self inflicted knife wounds to his neck and chest. Numerous meaning more than 5 or 10. And each wound caused great pain. Other PAS supporters are self-professed pedophiles. I could claim PAS from my husband because he is asking (telling) our child to call his new girlfriend mommy. However I will not align myself with this "junk science".
 
August 18, 2005, 8:16 pm CDT

mom2pagkid

Quote From: mom2pagkid

Since when does it only take one to make a child? And why is it all the woman's fault? And because she was "messing with a married man" does that mean she deserves to lose her children? And just because she is a woman does that mean we should not believe her? These are some of the most arcane statements I have ever read. Maybe we all need to go back in time to the 18th century when women were property and we had no minds and men could beat us and not be punished. Oh yeah that is the answer...... NOT!!!!! Because some appear to think women should be seen and not heard does not mean we will go away. We give life to children and nurture them in their tender years only to have a male judge and male attornies say we cannot provide for our children? Bah Humbug.
you are so right i was saying it takes two people for an affair not just one.yes just because she is a woman we should believe her.why shouldn't we?
 
August 19, 2005, 2:09 am CDT

Insanity! ! !

I cannot believe something like this can happen because a person is a Christian.  Who in their right mind could rule against a mother because of her faith?  This makes me just want to be sick.  And what kind of monster would seek to separate a mother from her children to validate their abnormal life?  Do what you want with your life.  Change your sex through surgury.  Sleep with dogs and cats and sheep, if you want.  Make a huge flag to advertise your choices.   BUT LEAVE A MOTHER AND HER CHILDREN ALONE ! ! !   

 
August 19, 2005, 2:19 am CDT

08/18 'Fighting for My Children'

It doesn't take a genius to see that giving these girls to their father was a ginormic mistake and was meant more to hurt Bridget than to help the girls.  What can be accomplished by handing them over to the care of the BETRAYED wife?  My God, what will she have planned for thEM?  They look exactly like their mother!  How could the wife NOT take her anger out on them?  Thank God these girls are home where they belong and not with a father and his wife, who, if they had their way, would have ended these girls' lives IN THE WOMB!   
 
August 19, 2005, 5:00 am CDT

neutral ground?

everyone here has posted for or against the "parents" of these  two children.   No one has contributed a perhaps...gentle solution to just what the kids should be hearing and where they should be now.....away from all this he said.she said..he did and she did........Children...no matter what situation they are in with parents.......love both.....and try hard not to hurt either one in their views about how they feel.   is anyone thinking.......if the children speak out....that they are also "torn" between two people   (not man nor women)......that raised and loved and support them so far?....these two parents...need to get a grip...and stop thinking of themselves and what they want.....and concentrate more on what would be best right now.........for the children until all this can be settled.  

 
August 19, 2005, 7:50 am CDT

Anger!!!

Anger!!! That makes me so angry. The courts should void that marriage and the adoption because "Michael" is a woman. She is sick and her family is sick get those children away from that nut! She needs serious counseling. How can any court place those children to be raised by someone who isn't sure about their own identity. "Michael" is very sick!  

  

Eight years ago my 4-month-old daughter was kidnapped from me and handed over to her birth father who at the time was 15 years old. I was 18 years old. When I contacted police they informed me that there was no such thing as parental kidnapping in the state of NC. I was forced to hire an attorney; I paid her $750.00. When the court date came around my attorney did not even show up for court and since then has been dis-barred and is nowhere to be found. However, I lost my court case due to lack of proper representation, a then 16 year old boy was awarded custody of my baby girl. He lived with his parents of course, one of which was a convicted felon on multiple charges including trafficking drugs and had spent time in prison on more than one occasion. I was awarded visitation every other weekend from 6:00pm Friday until 6:00pm Sunday. Everytime I attempted to exercise my visitation I was assaulted, threatened, and sometimes not even given the chance to see my daughter. On one such occasion I received a death threat that frightened me into moving out of state.  

To make a very long story short I stayed away from this man for very good reason. I recently learned that he had a crack-cocaine addiction, hit his best-friend in the head with a claw hammer, shot someone, went to prison, was committed to detox, assaulted many people including his own mother, attempted suicide, and one of his more recent actions was to rob the First Citizens Bank on March 16, 2005. Shortly after that he was involved in a shoot-out with the  Police Department in which an officer was forced to shoot and kill him.  

As soon as I learned that he was dead, I felt safe enough to go back and get my daughter who is now almost 8 years old. However, it just wasn't that simple. When he went to detox in 2002 he signed custody over to his parents also a convicted felon and a woman who never even learned to drive a car. Now the grandfather is deceased from heart failure and the grandmother who never even learned to drive a car has custody of my daughter. Now I don't understand how they were able to do this since my parental rights were never terminated and they did not even attempt to locate me to claim my daughter.  

Just to give you a little info about me. I am a full-time college student with two Associate Degrees, and enrolled in an undergraduate program at a private University. I currently maintain a 4.0 GPA and was elected by my student body to serve as the President of the Student Government Association. I also served on the Board of Trustees for the college, am a member of Phi Theta Kappa Honor Society, Who's Who among students in American Junior Colleges, The National Dean's List, and served as a delegate for the North Carolina Comprehensive Community College Student Government Association. I am also a mother of another child who is 3 years old. I am pursuing a Bachelors in Political Science and will eventually attend law school. This insane custody battle over my daughter has inspired a high school drop out to finish high school go to a community college, then a university, and one day a law school. I am determined to practice family law and help families. I am determined to make sure that nothing like happens to anyone else. 

I am an upstanding member of society. All these years my poor little girl has had to endure the wrath of that horrible monster, and even after he is dead I still cannot get my daughter back because the grandmother is fighting me.  It isn't right. 

 
August 19, 2005, 10:28 am CDT

Surprising Comments

I logged on here because I just finished watching this Tivo-d episode, and was curious to see what others thought. Perhaps I'm naive, but I was so shocked to see so many people focusing on the fact that Michael was born female.   

   

Those kids have been his for 16 years. He adopted them, so obviously Linda has considered him their father. More importantly, THEY consider him their father. Regardless of whether or not you approve of his lifestyle, he is the father they know and love, and to have him denounced as their father after so many years would be cruel.  

   

If they are 16 and 13, as someone on the forums stated, I believe they do have a right to be heard in court. They are more than old enough to have an opinion about what is to happen to them.  

   

Given the limited view of the situation we have been given, it appears to me that they are living with the better caregiver. Their mother seems entirely to bent on proving that her ex-husband is a sinner, and not too inclined to do what is best for her children. The slander she focuses towards Michael must be so hurtful for her children to hear.   

   

Michael, on the other hand, seems to be a good parent. He and his new wife seem to have a very healthy relationship with the children. The children themselves seemed so much more relaxed and happy when they were with Michael. While he has been heard slandering Linda as well, it seemed much more mild (while still wrong!). I appreciated the fact that he seemed abashed at some of the things he had said, while Linda just denied it all.  

   

The children are not going to be winners at all here. If Michael retains custody, Linda will be vindictive, and the children will not only have to put up with their mother's over-the-top religious views, they will also suffer her spite at being the 'loser.' If Linda regains custody, the children will lose the father they seem to love greatly.  

   

On a side note, it must be hard for the children to live with Linda with her new-found religion. They were not raised that way. To have a mother you know and love suddenly become an entirely different person must be very difficult.  I can't imagine she was always righteous, or she would not have married Michael.  

   

Anyway, best of luck to all involved. I hope you all, especially the children, have happy lives.  

   

-Michelle  

   

 
First | Prev | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | Next | Last