Topic : 05/30 Pretty/Ugly

These mothers are absolutely ungrateful! My husband and I have been trying to have a baby for almost a year and I would give anything to have a child like Victoria. I think all children are beautiful, chubby or sick. All children are a blessing regardless of what they look like. Stop and think about what your doing! Victoria's mother made me think that she needs her children taken away. No mother should ever treat their children like that. She should be so blessed to have a beautiful daughter like Victoria.

I cannot believe that woman.  She has two beautiful daughters, (I won't call her a Mother) and is so selfish she can't love both of them the same.   Well, let me tell you, I would give anything to have 2 children, I lost my son when he was 13 years old in a gun accident and I also lost 2 grandbabies that were premature.  How dare her, I would literally scratch my child out of that ground to have him back and my other two babies also,  and she has hers and has no idea how to treat them.  She is unfit to be a mother and I think they both should be removed from her until she has a psychiatric examination.  There is something mentally wrong with her.  

I've been there myself.   As a child, with 3 sisters, I was "neglected" by my mother.  (Not my father.)  I was never told I was pretty or hugged or heard "I love you".   To this day, it's very strange for me to hug someone or be close to someone. 

I was teased and bullied in school.   So much so, I absolutely HATED school.  I was depressed, I tried killing myself.  It was horrible. 

I started wearing glasses when I was 9 - my mother picked out my 1st pair of glasses - ugly plastic green and black - I hated them.  I honestly thought she choose them on purpose to make me even uglier.     (After I graduated from high school, I got contact lenses.) 

When my younger sister (who was blond and blue-eyed and very pretty) wanted to go to finishing school, I piped up that I wanted to go to.  Despite our differences, me and my kid sister were close.  So my father let me go too.  I learned how to apply makeup, do my hair, and how to dress.  It helped my self-esteem. 

Once I was on my own, I discovered that I wasn't that unattractive.  But because of my past, and remembering how complete strangers treated me (looking at me with pity, and making comments) I decided to never treat anyone different based on their looks. 

I've dated men that were tall, short, underweight, overweight, different ethnic and religious backgrounds, poor, rich, and even blueblood.  I decided it was what was inside the man that counted - not on anything else. 

When I was in my mid 20's, I decided it was time for a change, and went punk.  I had a hairstyle that I could make it into a mohawk or look "more accepting to society".  I did an experiment where I did my hair (punky looking) and makeup (punky looking),  BUT! wore different outfits.  I went to the same department store/malls, etc.   When I had my punky outfit on, people stared at me - looked like they wanted to spit on me, looked at me in disgust.   When I later changed into a dressy dress and high heels, etc., men opened doors for me. 

So this makes me wonder if Phil's son had been in a suit and tie with his "makeover", if people's reactions would still be the same. 

I've worked in Admitting in a Hospital, and we see all sorts of people.  But people are people, and no mater what they look like, they all deserve to be treated with respect and dignity. 

  

The mother who treats Victoria worse than an animal (making her sleep on the floor???) should count her blessings.  She has two beautiful daughters that are healthy.  Victoria may have a skin condition, but there are dermatologists that can help that.   The mother is attractive.  But you know what?  The Lord giveth and the Lord can take away. 

I knew someone who was accepted into NYC's top modelling agency.  The week before she was to leave for NYC, she was driving on her way to her parent's wedding anniversary dinner.  As she was driving, a drunk driver crossed the centre line and hit her head on.  She ended up with her face all cut up with the windshield glass.   Her new career was not meant to be.   She was beautiful, but even more beautiful on the inside.  She was gracious and kind.  So even though her new carrer wasn't to be, she went on to do other things. 

  

And the mother who won't let her daughter play with unattractive children?  GET OVER IT!!! 

I would rather have a child who chooses her friends based on if they're kind, nice, caring, etc. than someone who was pretty and mean.    

Most of my friends growing up were in some people's eyes "unattractive".  Why?  Because alot of the pretty ones were snobs and mean to people like me and my friends.   

  

God help those mothers.  I hope the children get the help they deserve and need.  No child should be treated like Victoria. 

Dr. Phil, I watch you faithfully but I have never contacted your show before butI am so angry at the mom (if you can call her that) who makes a difference in her children based on their looks. I think her daughter Victoria is just as beautiful as her daughter Hunter and I think that if everyone in the world looked the same, we would have a boring world. I have two beautiful girls and I myself have always been considered attractive but that is very low on my list of what is important in life. I think this woman is very blessed to have these beautiful girls but she is teaching them to be very shallow and that their self esteem should be based on how they look. God forbid, should Hunter be disfigured in any way, would that mean she would love her any less. I could not choose between my brunette, hazel-eyed daughter and my blonde blue-eyed daughter if my life depended on it. What will Hunter think if she gains weight or develops acne, that she'll no longer love her and what is she teaching Victoria, that she is unlovable. In my opinion, this woman does not even deserve these children. She is scarring both of them for life and I only pray that their self-esteem can be repaired, especially Victoria's. I am very proud of both my girls, but much more than their looks, they are giving, loving, intelligent SOULS who just happen to look the way they do.  Aren't you glad God looks on our hearts and not on our outward appearance. I am, but I am afraid this mom would fall short in both categories in my opinion. She needs to wake up and count her blessings before her daughters both find someone else who would love them both unconditionally.     

I know how it feels to be stereotyped because of not being pretty and also being overweight. I've been "heavy" all my life and have been made fun of most of it. I am not the worst looking person in the world but I'm not the prettiest either. I was called names all during school and I've heard the phrase "you have such a cute smile" or "you have pretty eyes and teeth" that I could scream. Don't people realize what they are doing when they say things like that.  My family always taught us that you never make fun of anyone for anything and I live by that. It only takes a split second for everything to be turned around and your world started over.  

  

Whether people realize it or not, they do look at people differently according to their looks and size. They may not think they do or plan on it, but they do. I know because I've been on the receiving end all my life and it's no fun.  

  

Thanks Dr Phil for this show. This has been going on forever and ever but maybe your show opened peoples eyes and they realize how they treat people and will start paying attention from now on.. 

Did you hear Dr. Phil at the end of the show say to Jay "Well you really did look pretty bad, like a pervert or something'  

  

That is the same exact kind of judgement. He has a pre-conceived idea what a "good" person looks like and what a "bad" person or "pervert" looks like.  People in real life maybe don't always have access to nice clothes or hairdressers etc to keep them looking like the "good" people. 

  

I'm not knocking Dr. Phil. I love him and watch him everyday but I found that very interesting and I don't even think he thought about it when he said it. 

  

Hmmmmm 

I am very worried about the young girl with the mother that treats her like a second class citizen. I believe what this mother is doing is a form of abuse. This mothers actions are just as bad if not worse as physical abuse. I'm not sure she should have custody of both of her daughters.

As I sat and watched todays show I thought back to when I was a child. I was one of those ugly ducklings. Now as an adult I have a very healthy self esteem and like me. This was so much in part from my parents. They never let me think I was ugly for long.  

  

I decided to wait tell the show was over to come see the posts. I see everyone felt the same way I did. Yes I yelled at Mommy Barbie too, But then I thought about it a bit and you know this is not all that strange after all. We all as a society think this way on some level because if we didn't this would not even need to be a topic for a show.  

  

How many of you who posted are going to sit and have a talk with your children after watching this? What are you going to do to make a change in your own thinking to help change this? What are you going to do the next time your child makes a hurtful comment about someone? Will you come back to this post after Monday's show? We have let this go on for so long, Can we as a society can we change it now?  

  

I guess I just realized that even though I am now mad at myself for thinking this way too (not to the extent of the mothers) but to some degree I think this way too. I asked myself how would I have reacted if Jay walked up to me in the two different looks. Likely the same as all the other people. Or more on the nice in a different way like the woman in the chocolate store. So I have vowed to never look at a persons looks but see something more in them. Can you make that vow to yourself?  

  

Well just my thoughts and a hope to maybe make a change in the way the world works. 

  

I AM SO UPSET AT THIS SHOW TODAY WITH THE SO CALLED MOTHERS THAT ARE TEACHING THERE KIDS TO DISRESPECT OTHER KIDS AND SHAME ON THE WOMAN THAT IS NEGLECTING HER OWN CHILD I MY SELF HAVE A SKIN DEFORMATION AND LET ME TELL YOU I WOULD NEVER TEACH MY KID THAT THEY ARE UGLY OR LOVE THEM ANY LESS FOR IT MY SON HAD WARTS ON HIS LEGS TIL HE WAS 7 AND I ALWAYS TAUGHT HIM THAT HE WAS SPECIAL TO HAVE THEM I WOULD LOVE TO GIVE HER A PIEACE OF MY MIND DR PHIL IF YU READ THIS I WOULD LOVE TO COME ON YOUR SHOW AND TALK TO THAT WOMAN HECK BOTH OF THEM I AM SO DISGUSTED AT THEM I WAS YELLING AT THE SCREEN AND THE ONE WOMAN IS NOTHING SPECIAL HER SELF TO TEACH HER KID NOT TO PLAY WITH UGLY KIDS THAT IS SO WRONG WHEN SHE IS NOT TO PRETTY HER SELF WHO KNOWS  WHAT THEY HAVE THEY MIGHT HAVE GOTTEN THEM SELFS DIRTY PLAYING I MY SELF DONT DRESS UP I DRESS CASUAL ALL THE TIME COMFORTABLE I CALL IT AND NO ONE KNOWS IF I AM RIH OR POOR THEY GUESS BAD DUE TO WHAT I WEAR  AHHHHH I AM SO UPSET THAT THERE ARE PARENTS THAT ARE TEACHING THERE KIDS THIS STUFF THAT IS WHAT IS WRONG WITH THE KIDS THESE DAYS  BAD PARENTING  

THANK YOU KRIS