Message Boards

Topic : 09/23 What a Difference a Year Makes

Number of Replies: 30
New Messages This Week: 0
Last Reply On:
Created on : Friday, September 16, 2005, 04:36:20 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1

Dr. Phil checks up on past guests to see how much of his advice stuck. When David and Deandra were on the show, their 22-month-old daughter was in five classes and was only allowed to eat a vegan diet. Have they loosened up their strict ways? And, 17-year-old Tracy tried to convince Dr. Phil that the photos on her website were not too provocative. She's an adult now, and claims her site is less sexy. So why does she still want Dr. Phil's approval? Talk about the show here.

 

Find out what happened on the show.

 

More September 2005 Show Boards.


As of January, 2009, this message board will become "Read Only" and will be closed to further posting. Please join the NEW Dr. Phil Community to continue your discussions, personalize your message board experience, start a blog and meet new friends.

September 23, 2005, 3:09 pm CDT

09/23 What a Difference a Year Makes

 I am really looking foward to the show also. I thinkt hat Dr.Phil has great advice for them. Lets see how many actually took Dr.Phils advice, I am thinking about half did!  

  

 
September 23, 2005, 6:26 pm CDT

TO : DR. PHIL

     I really love what you have done for people. You are a great person, and I watch your show everyday. You have done alot for me, and I have not even met you yet..I thank you so much.......
 
September 23, 2005, 6:58 pm CDT

09/23 What a Difference a Year Makes

Quote From: luvnmykids

  

   I had to comment on this subject.  Currently my son sleeps with me and my husband.  This started when he was 8 months old.  He was sick and I was scared that he would choke while he was in his crib and I wouldn't hear it.  Well now he is 3 1/2 and still in our bed.  If we try to make him lay in his own bed he cries and screams that he is scared.  I don't have the heart to let him cry himself sick so he ends up in bed with us.  If anyone has any advice on how to get him out of our bed I would really appreciate it.  I am expecting another baby in 3 weeks, so my nights are already restless.   I love cuddling with my son, but I also like to be able to cuddle with my husband from time to time.  We have  tried the whole.."letting him fall asleep in our bed and moving him to his bed later" but he is usually back in our bed about 2-3 hours later.   Another thing I have wondered is...he loves to play with my hair and in the middle of the night if he is starting to wake up he grabs my hair and holds on to it and falls back asleep.  Please...someone help me.  I am open to all advice and suggestions at this point.  Thanks a bundle. 

Suzy, I am not expert on childrearing and I don't pretend to be. But this statement said a lot: 

  

"I don't have the heart to let him cry himself sick so he ends up in bed with us." 

  

That  is the whole issue. If he thinks that if he cries long enough you will go and get him, he's going to continue to cry until you do. As Dr. Phil says, he has your number and he's dialing it. For one night, let him cry. He won't get sick. He won't perish. He'll realize that you mean what you say when you tell him it is time for him to sleep in his own bed. And no, I don't think it is being cruel. I can remember when I was a kid not getting something  I wanted and crying. When I didn't get it and realized my crying was getting me nothing but a red, wet  face, I stopped. 

  

As I said, just my two cents. I do hope things get better for you soon. 

  

  

 
September 23, 2005, 7:44 pm CDT

Hope this helps

Quote From: atlswan

Suzy, I am not expert on childrearing and I don't pretend to be. But this statement said a lot: 

  

"I don't have the heart to let him cry himself sick so he ends up in bed with us." 

  

That  is the whole issue. If he thinks that if he cries long enough you will go and get him, he's going to continue to cry until you do. As Dr. Phil says, he has your number and he's dialing it. For one night, let him cry. He won't get sick. He won't perish. He'll realize that you mean what you say when you tell him it is time for him to sleep in his own bed. And no, I don't think it is being cruel. I can remember when I was a kid not getting something  I wanted and crying. When I didn't get it and realized my crying was getting me nothing but a red, wet  face, I stopped. 

  

As I said, just my two cents. I do hope things get better for you soon. 

  

  

Hi luvmykids, I hope this helps in some small way. You know what? I have a 13 year old daughter and a 7 year old son...and my daughter never really had any issues with wanting to sleep with us, but our son did. I was thinking when I read your message about how differently I raised both of them. I think the fact that I had a certain type of routine for our daughter, helped her to adjust better to her bed. I remember I would play with her for a few minutes...then we brushed teeth, went potty and finally a bedtime story where I literally sat on her bed and read to her. I then kissed her goodnight, lights out, and that was it. LOL, with our son...I think I became a bit more lazy...he still comes in now and then...but not very often. The problem is I am such a sound sleeper, that I don't even know he is there until morning and my husband works at night most nights, so that leaves me not much choice but to accept it. I wish I didn't sleep so sound. Anyhow, back to your question...I think that a routine might help. It's a toughie...I know. Been there done that..Good luck to you. By the way, I love your "luvmykids" user name..I love my kids too!
 
September 23, 2005, 10:18 pm CDT

To Dr. Phil

I must say that I usually love the update shows and hearing how people have changed. This show today frustrated me alittle bit. I was hoping to hear Dr. Phil say something about the ones who didn't really change. I was disappointed to see that Tracey had not changed and does not think that those pictures are terrible. I really thought Dr. Phil would tell that mom off alittle because I don't think anything was done from the last time they were on the show. I know that she is 18 now and can do what she wants BUT she looked terrible and someone needed to tell her that she needs to be careful with the way she looks. I was also disappointed not to see Mikai and his family. I was looking forward to seeing his improvement and seeing how the family is coping. I, too, wanted to see the wife of the doctor who had a pregnant girlfriend on the side. I was so excited to see if she left the guy and moved on. Please fill us in Dr. Phil and next time a guest comes back for an update show and hasn't improved, Let them have it! Love your show!!!!
 
September 24, 2005, 9:29 am CDT

SEXY?????

 So, Tracy thinks her new website is less "sexy" than the old one. Well, I don't find either website the least bit sexy!  Trashy. Sleazy. Pornographic. Anything but sexy. What was her mother thinking, letting a 17-year-old minor create such a website.  If an adult male had created a website, using those pictures,  he would've been busted for child  pornography!
 
September 24, 2005, 9:40 am CDT

More power to Tracy

This was a rare case where I disagreed with Dr. Phil's advice to a guest.  I didn't realize that Dr. Phil was such a prude.  Tracy already has the qualities that Dr. Phil preaches--self confidence, pride, motivation, self-esteem, and identification of her talents--yet he wants her to give up the modeling career that she is seeking.  I don't understand that.  I'm a middle-aged man, and I don't find anything pornographic or sleazy about her web site pictures.  They look like attractive fashion model pictures to me.  It's too bad that we've come to take almost any display of the female form as pornography.  Why don't we take it as beauty that is to be appreciated.  I learned a lot from those focus groups that saw Tracy's pictures as sleazy.  (Reactions reveal a lot more than actions.)  I learned that those folks have dirty minds that lunge at the opportunity to attach sexual innuendo to any word or picture.  This is a problem common to most Americans these days.  Tracy, the clothes look great on you.  Keep following your dream of being a model until YOU make the decision to follow another path.  Best wishes.
 
September 24, 2005, 4:22 pm CDT

09/23 What a Difference a Year Makes

Quote From: jamrod

Hi luvmykids, I hope this helps in some small way. You know what? I have a 13 year old daughter and a 7 year old son...and my daughter never really had any issues with wanting to sleep with us, but our son did. I was thinking when I read your message about how differently I raised both of them. I think the fact that I had a certain type of routine for our daughter, helped her to adjust better to her bed. I remember I would play with her for a few minutes...then we brushed teeth, went potty and finally a bedtime story where I literally sat on her bed and read to her. I then kissed her goodnight, lights out, and that was it. LOL, with our son...I think I became a bit more lazy...he still comes in now and then...but not very often. The problem is I am such a sound sleeper, that I don't even know he is there until morning and my husband works at night most nights, so that leaves me not much choice but to accept it. I wish I didn't sleep so sound. Anyhow, back to your question...I think that a routine might help. It's a toughie...I know. Been there done that..Good luck to you. By the way, I love your "luvmykids" user name..I love my kids too!

  

  

   Thanks for the advice.  I think I'll try both.  We have read a bed time story but after that the screaming starts and the "Im scared".  We used to let him cry when he was little but he never used to tell us that he was scared.  I guess the other person that replied might have a point.  He probably does have us figured out.  Guess it is time for "tough love".  Anyways.  Thanks you guys.  I'll be sure to let you know if it works or not.  I hope it does.  LOL  Oh and on the sound sleeper thing..I have the same problem so when he comes into our room after we move him I sleep right through it.  Thanks for the compliment on the name too...wasn't hard to pick..LOL.   

 
September 24, 2005, 6:37 pm CDT

Dr Phil Familly?

What happened to the Dr. Phil family update and the update to Makahi (spelling wrong)? 

I changed my schedule around Friday so I could see it.  

I followed the Dr Phil family every week. 

Reason? 

Will there be an update? 

 
September 24, 2005, 10:57 pm CDT

Co-Sleeping and Letting them Cry

I generally agree w/ Dr. Phil but it frustrates me to no end that he just doesn't seem to "get " attachment parenting.  His comment that it's ok for little Madeline to cry as long as she does it in her own bed is just terrible!  I know a lot of people think that crying it out is ok but please, if you don't want to do it, don't feel pressured just b/c you think it's the "only way."   

  

Dr. Phil said that the longer you let your child stay in your bed, the harder it is to get them out.  But Dr. Sears (who he's had on the show before) says that if your child feels loved/secure/well attached, he or she will move out of your bed when he or she is ready- so it won't be harder if your child is ready.  For more info on Dr. Sears andt he concept of attachment parenting, go to: www.askdrsears.com . 

  

First of all, here's a great link on co-sleeping: http://www.askdrsears.com/html/7/T071000.asp 

  

Secondly, here's a link on a Harvard study about how letting your baby "cry it out" actually harms them: http://www.naturalchild.com/research/harvard_attention.html (granted, I think the study was on infants and Madeline is now a toddler, but the study may have relevance for some readers of this post...). 

  

Finally, here are some links on info for how to transition your child out of your bed (if that's what both parents want): http://www.drjaygordon.com/ap/sleep.htm and http://www.pantley.com/elizabeth/content/ncsstpsummary.htm .  You DON't have to make your child suffer to get transition them to their own bed.  Sure, the methods listed in the links above take some work, but let's face it: parenting is work.  If you've been co-sleeping for any amount of time and you and your partner are ready for your child to be in his/her own bed, don't suddenly banish them to their own room- instead, ease into it.  Listen to your heart on this one. 

  

  

 
First | Prev | 2 | Next | Last