Topic : 12/21 Shocking Teen Trends

My daughter and I have an open relationship.  She tells me so much sometimes I don't want to hear it but I am glad she can come to me with anything.  I am afraid that she doesn't tell me everything; I am so scared for her.  I don't want her to do anything she will regret when she gets older and I hope she will make the right decision if something should arise.  I tell her to ask herself that very question before she makes a decision, "Is this something I may regret?” 

She has gone through so many friendships over the past 2 years.  The kids she brings home seem so nice at first and then they are complete jerk offs in a week or two.  The things they do to one another are amazing.  My daughter has had her heart broken so many times that it took away that innocence she once possessed.  She no longer has trust in people and keeps them away at arms length. 

I am afraid to let her have sleepovers because of some of the things they have come to me wanting to do and things I have found out about.  My daughter is chastised because she doesn't want to smoke and drink, get in fights, and act like a moron.  Ironically enough, the girls that do this to her obviously need some kind of relationship with their parents because it is just not there.  I say this because I have seen it with my own eyes.  The parents are so quick to dump their children off on someone else so they can go drink and have a good time.  It's not right. 

Hello we are the parents of Erich Winters, a 15 year old boy who died on December 18th  by playing the "Choking Game" or "Space Monkey" by himself. He was found by his 13 year old brother who walked in only to see a belt around his neck that was tied to the top bunk bed. Erich's knees were on the ground still and he was leaning in to the bottom bunk. We would like to share our story with the entire nation and inform parents that this is not a game but a deadly trend that must be talked about. Please if anyone has questions or comments please email us at erichsstory@yahoo.com . Thank You for the show.          Sincerely, Robert and Christine Pedrosa  

WOW! what can i say....  

In the past few months i have heard not only on the news, Dr. Phil, i have also read about this game in a few magazines, but I'm not sure how to feel. Yes, i am very happy that its been put out that for the whole nation to see but truthfully I'm more than a little scared. 

I guess i should start from the beginning. . . I'm 18 years old and I'm very bright. I not only go to high school but am taking college classes as well. I say this but i don'tt want yall to think that its only kids that don't have anything to do or like the troubled kids.... 

I was 9 years old the first time i played ,what i knew it as, "the pass out game". Look back i realize it was stupid but back then it just seemed like another fun childhood game to play with not only my sisters but my cousins and friends, like hide-n-seek or tag. No one knew that we were playing this game even though we were some times jsut a few feet away from the adults. They just didn't pay much attention, i guess, as long as we were being quite. I don't really remember why we stoped playing but the last time was when i was 13 or 14 .....i guess we just grew out of it. Although now i realize now it was stupid to ever start. 

But the reason for me writing this is because well first off during all those years that i played the game i never thought you could ever die from it. Not once had i heard of anything bad happening to a kid from playing this game. im  also wondering why i has taken this long for people to realize what is going on behind closed doors. I know the game has atleast been aroud 10 years because thats when i was taught it but some one hasd to have taught it to my cousin first. 

We were the lucky ones, no one was ever hurt too bed besides the few times heads were hit against the hard floors. Im so very sorry for all those families whom have losted loved ones just being kids.  My heart goes out to yall. 

You are obviously a good mother for your daughter to want to be open with you.  In my opinion, you should let your daughter have sleepovers--at YOUR house.  You should be involved in them.  That way you are the responsible party.  I have a difficult time trusting others to care for my children because someone else will never love my child like I do.  My children's safety is a priority to me, and it may not be a priority to someone else.  The only time I was "up to no good" as a child was when I was out with friends, and away from my parents.  The best thing for you to do is to love your daughter unconditionally and set the best example for her that you can.  You should be the biggest influence in her life because, in reality, you're not always going to be there to keep an eye on her.  Parenting is not easy.  I have 3 daughters myself and know what you are feeling.  But I also know that today, tomorrow, and until they grow up and move out, I have to be the best mother that I can be for them.  I want to some day look at my daughters and say,  "I did a good job in raising them."  Be your daughters' best friend, so that when she is compromised with making a decision between right and wrong she will ask herself, "If my mom finds out, how will this make her feel?"  Which is the same as the question you've placed in her mind, "Is this something I may regret later?"  Just something to ponder... 

Hi Jennifer, 

  The surgery I had is called left mesial temporal lobectomy.  I had my left hippocampus removed.  The hippocampus controls short term memory.  I'd be more than happy to answer any other questions you may have.  I host two chat rooms online each and every week.  One on America Online, and one on Yahoo!  Please feel free to email me at either : LisaM11463@aol.com or JoanofArc1994@yahoo.com  

My surgery took 15 1/2 hours.  Don't worry though, doctors know so much more about epilepsy nowadays that surgeries do not take that long like mine did 11 years ago.  The doctors in Syracuse, New York gave me a life I never imagined I would live to see.  I'd like to see you as well as everyone else who has seizures seizure-free also.  Get a hold of me anytime, I'd be more than happy to talk with you.  I've been counseling others with epilepsy online for the last ten years now, and have counseled well over 1,500 people from all over the world. 

Lisa-Marie 

MY CHILD WOULD NEVER play such a STUPID GAME such as that "choking game"....RIGHT? Ummm, WRONG...... 

My mouth dropped while watching the show about Teen Trends last month. I was just shocked that something like that was actually occuring with kids......BUT, I comforted myself with the thought "Well, that is terrible but MY kids would NEVER do such a stupid thing"....HA HA HA! Here is what happened: 

I had been waiting for the right moment to non-chalantly ask my 14 year old son if he had ever heard of such a game. I figured this was the best way to open dialogue with him without making his defenses come up. Then came the perfect opporunity. He and I were all alone for a while at home  and he was sort of hanging around me in the kitchen. So, I tried to slide in a conversation that led to my subtle line of quesitoning.  

 At first he said he had never heard of anything called "Space Monkeys", but as I proceded to tell him it was a game that had to do with choking, he became quiter.  So, I asked him if HE had ever known anyone that had done that, or heard kids talking about something similar. He said, "yeah, I've heard of something like that". While I was walking to the pantry to gather some ingredients for the meal I was making, I, once again, NONCHALANTLY said "have you ever done it"? HE said "no". I was relieved, but as I reached up to the shelf for flour, something deep inside me (call it my mom-instinct) told me he was lying. I didn't want to accuse him of lying.....I mean, I remember feeling confronted by MY parents growing up and the last thing a teen wants to do is have their parent trick them into confessing something, SO, I said "hmmmm, you know...for some weird reason I am thinking you may have participated somehow......honey, did you"? Well, that was all it took. He told me the story.....He had been at his father & stepmom's house last summer when his older stepsister "did it" to him and a friend. He said it wasn't a big deal but I explained what I had seen and heard on Dr. Phil's show, especially how a medical Doctor sure thought it was a BIG DEAL in regards to  how much damage really occurs to the brain and body, not to mention the threat of death. He had no idea it could hurt a person. He told me he had been very stupid to let someone choke him and it opened up a great conversation from there regarding peer pressure and not succuming to it, etc. He is the kind of kid who is usually a little afraid of doing anything that could harm him or someone else, so I KNOW IF HE WOULD DO IT< NO KID IS IMMUNE TO TRYING THIS. 

His stepdad and I are SO THANKFUL for Dr. Phil and Robin. I do believe their SHOW makes a difference.  

To the people who shared their strories that day.....THANK YOU.  My heart especially goes out to the single mom of twins, one of whom had died.  She really seems HONEST, though, and I have high hopes she will work her way through her grief and into becoming the mother her other son so desperately needs. 

Thanks again for the SHOW and I guess I NEED TO TAKE MY MOMMA'S ADVICE NEXT TIME by writing such words as "my kid would never" ON CHOCOLATE, because I JUST MAY HAVE TO EAT THOSE WORDS someday!