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Topic : 10/06 "Stand Up for Yourself!"

Number of Replies: 452
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Created on : Friday, September 30, 2005, 03:38:02 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1

Imagine losing every freedom you've ever known: The freedom to drive where you want, see whom you want, buy what you want. Though Kathy and Elaine have never met, they share the common bond of being prisoners in their own relationships, trapped by abusive controlling husbands. Will they find the strength to leave? Then, Joan's husband is so controlling, he won't let her shower every day - and you'll never believe why. Plus, a former abuser seeks help for his ex-wife. Share your thoughts, join the discussion.

 

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November 25, 2008, 1:30 am CST

Hope

I have been in a verbally, emotionally, psychologically, and sometimes physically abusive relationship for over 30 years. I left 9 months ago when he threatened to blow up my car. I am getting divorced. My kids are grown and gone. Yet he is "perfect" to family and acquaintances. He is so controlling, I never went out at night by myself or with my kids for almost 20 years. He stepped on my right toes, with his heavy boot, for 18 years, always saying it was my fault or that he was just clumsy. I wanted to mention, I would have left him a long time ago, if I could have found a job to support myself and the kids. I had nowhere to go and no money. You try getting kicked out of your house with no money, and no job, and nowhere to go. You would think twice about it too. Maybe you would make the best of the situation because you would have no choice.I am 56 years old, and I have to live with my mom. I work and I'm going to school to get my bachelor's degree in business. It's very hard, but I will make it. The loneliness is the hardest. Good luck to you all.
 
January 8, 2009, 3:51 pm CST

Seriously Stupid

Quote From: carole5324

You can only be controlled as much as you let someone control YOU.   You must stand up to the abuser and if he physically hits you, call 911.  He will be arrested and put in jail.  Then take out a warrant against him so if he promises things will be different and want to come back, he will not be able to do so.  The law is on YOUR side.  You say you don't want to "rock his boat" because he will go into a rage, throw things, hit and/or abuse you and the children?  Your kids are now swearing at you and mimicking his abuse?  Ladies, what is wrong with you??  You picked these idiots, you cater and bow to them, you are their willing slaves, so are you both living in the 15th century when women were the properties of their husbands?  Do you want your adult children to be the same way as their father and think abuse is a normal way to live??  Don't do that to them!   I've been there, lived that, done that and changed my life after 20 years.  You can too but it takes a lot of courage. 
I hope you have read this to yourself. I am the Kathy off of this show and I have never heard anything so stupid. Stand up to him and if he hits you then call 911. That is like playing pointed a loaded gun at your head,, pulling the trigger and hoping you can call 911 afterwards. You want to know what's wrong with me, what's wrong with you that you would advise someone to endanger themselves and possibly their children. People like you are why there are so many abused women out there!!!! If you have been there then you wouldn't be so quick to throw stones!! If anyone out there that has intelligent advice would like to give, I would love to hear it! Standing up for myself!!!!
 
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