Quote From: piers_I posted before asking women in this thread to please be careful about what they post online; as abusive husbands often monitor their wives' computer usage.
In surfing around I found some info on this topic from the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence:
"
Internet Safety
WARNING
Taking all of the actions on this page may not prevent an abuser from discovering your email and Internet activity. The safest way to find information on the Internet is to go to a safer computer. Some suggestions would be your local library, a friend's house or your workplace. Other safety suggestions: Change your password often, do not pick obvious words or numbers for your password, and make sure to include a combination of letters and numbers for your password.
HOW AN ABUSER CAN TRACK YOUR ACTIVITIES
Email
If an abuser has access to your email account, he or she may be able to read your incoming and outgoing mail. Even if you believe your account is secure, make sure you choose a password he or she will not be able to guess.
If an abuser sends you threatening or harassing email messages, you can print and save them as evidence of this abuse. These messages may also constitute a federal offense. For more information on this issue, contact your local United States Attorney's Office.
ERASING YOUR TRACKS
History/cache file
If an abuser knows how to read your computer's history of cache file (automatically saved web pages and graphics), he or she may be able to see information you have viewed on the Internet.
You can clear your history or empty your cache file in your brower's settings*
Netscape:
Pull down Edit menu, select Preferences. Click on Navigator or choose "Clear History". Click on Advanced then select Cache. Click on "Clear Disk Cache".
Internet Explorer:
Pull down Tools menu, select Internet Options. On General page under Temporary Internet Files, Click on Delete Files. If asked, check the box to delete all offline content. Still within the Temporary Internet Files section, click on Setting (This step may make it harder to navigate pages where you would like your information to be remembered, but these remaining cookies do show website pages you have visited. Therefore, use your own judgment as to whether or not to take this next step). Click on "View Files", Manually highlight all the files (cookies) shown, then hit Delete. Close that window, then on General page under History section, click on "Clear History."
AOL:
Pull down Members menu, select Preferences. Click on WWW icon. Then select Advanced. Purge Cache.
Additionally, you need to make sure that the "Use Inline Autocomplete" box is NOT checked. This function will complete partial web addresses while typing location in the address bar at the top of the browser.
If you are using Internet Explorer, this box can be found on the MS Internet Explorer Page by clicking on "Tools" at the top of the screen, then "Internet Options" and then the "Advanced" tab. About halfway down there is a "Use Inline Autocomplete" box that can be checked or unchecked by clicking on it. Uncheck the box to disable the feature that automatically completes an Internet address when you start typing in the Internet address box.
*This information may not completely hide your tracks. Many browser types have features that display recently visited sites. The safest way to find information on the Internet would be at a local library, a friend's house, or at work.
For help call the National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) TTY 1-800-787-3224 "
I hope I haven't broken any rules about posting this information from the NCADV's website. I worry that some women will find out as I did the hard way years ago when my now ex found out I was researching custody and divorce laws in my state on our home computer.
I ended up getting out of the marriage by working nights as a cashier (no college education, hs diploma only) and I managed to do it even though I had bad health and a two year old. I got a status quo order from the court where my husband had to pay all the household bills since he refused to move out and I had nowhere to go with my baby (My family thought I was making a mistake at the time, they now know different)
I'm not saying it's easy. I'm saying you have to get creative, explore all the options, and keep the goal of freedom in front of you. Not just for you, but for your children. Start today, and be careful!
Thanks for sharing this with everyone, I found out the hard way my husband was monitoring my every move. It sucks too because he is a computer wiz, had keyloggers I couldnt even find (and I consider myself pretty computer savvy) and even when you delete the history it is still there, I mean I would delete the history from 2 places plus recycle bin and still he could see it all somehow, plus access to all my accounts, but even if you can delete everything that can spark their interest too because then they want to know what youre hiding then. Most men probably arent as freakin computer smart as mine is, which I guess is a wayward compliment to him lol, but for those that are its easier just to stay on very safe grounds because I have found it is impossible to hide, delete, or cover up anything on my phones or computer from him (vonage is great but they detail all the calls) Unfortunatly for me, I have always related better to guys then females much to my jealous husbands dislike, so he "banned" me from all male friends, and it sucks I feel so lonely sometimes, I cant even chat or email old friends now without getting caught, just because of his insecurity. Of course he gets upset when I talk about stuff with girlfriends, pretty much anythign interesting in my life offends him I am telling our business. Oh well.
Imagine losing every freedom you've ever known: The freedom to drive where you want, see whom you want, buy what you want. Though Kathy and Elaine have never met, they share the common bond of being prisoners in their own relationships, trapped by abusive controlling husbands. Will they find the strength to leave? Then, Joan's husband is so controlling, he won't let her shower every day - and you'll never believe why. Plus, a former abuser seeks help for his ex-wife. Share your thoughts, join the discussion.
