Topic : 10/07 The Latest Debates

When the one lady brought up the statistics from Uganda and she was put off because they said that their culture is totally different and they are not inundated with sex like we are I just knew I had to comment. I just spent two weeks in Africa. I was in the schools there teaching an abstinence program. Aids is so ramp-id in Africa and the only answer is abstinence.  First of all you just walk through the airports and there are naked pictures of women. In their culture sex is taken from 6 year olds. It is expected all the time from men. Schools hand out condoms like it is candy. We did a test and showed the teens how ineffective condoms are. We took 10 of the condoms that the school hands out and filled them with water. 8 of the 10 had holes in them. Put all of that aside and talk to the teenagers.  The guys don't like wearing the condoms cause it doesn't feel as good so they don't. So them saying that the statistics she used from Uganda don't apply... I disagree. They have it worse than we do so I think it could work if the we would just teach the kids not only the importance of not having sex because of disease and pregnancy, but the importance of saving yourself for the person you really love and will spend the rest of your life with. That for them to take all of their previous sexual relationships into their marriage is taking baggage that will cause a lot of problems.  Okay now put Africa aside. I have worked with teenagers for 10 years. They tell me all the time that they don't listen in their sex ed classes because it is embarrassing! I wish the show would have had teenagers on the show and heard their opinion. Hear from them what they listen to and don't. 

I have three children aged 22, 20 and 16.  I did preach abstinence to my children.  My oldest daughter was recently married and was a virgin on her wedding day.  Both she and her fiance were very proud of that fact, as was I.  My other two children are following the same path. 

It is possible for parents to teach their children to respect members of the opposite sex and to respect themselves.  I do not believe it is the responsibility of the schools to intervene by passing out condoms.  That would actually go against the grain of what I am trying to instill.   

I don't understand the problem here. It is possible to breastfeed without baring the breast for all to see. One can buy special tops designed for this purpose, use a blanket or whatever. I have tried the blanket and have the same problem that the lady on the show had, my daughter would kick it off. But a poncho works really well if it is large enough. Nursing tops are by far the best. But even without these things, I was able to breastfeed without baring my breasts. It just takes practice, and a little care and respect for others. People are more likely to respect breastfeeding and want to do it themselves if it is done modestly and with respect for others. I see no problem with simply asking someone if it bothers them to do it in front of them, and offering to go elsewhere for a few minutes. My child would often fall asleep at the breast, but you just pull your top back down and go back to the conversation while still holding the baby.  

Pumping is NOT the same as breastfeeding from the breast. The pump does not extract the same quality of breastmilk as does the baby's expertly designed mouth, and the nutritional benefits decrease as soon as it hits the air because of oxidation (spoiling), and of course you miss the essential bonding part of it. No one wants to get human nutrition from a plastic bottle.  

The biggest problem I have with this is that usually the same people who are offended by breastfeeding have no problem with wearing low-cut or revealing blouses in public. They laugh at jokes made about women's breasts and watch movies about these things with apparently no problem. They tell their girlfriends that they look good in revealing clothes. So the message is that it's okay to bare one's breasts for sexual reasons in public, but not for the essentiality of human infant nutrition. That is a double standard, and it's wrong.  

I haven't read all the replies on this topic, too many!! 

I just wanted to share my view....I breastfed both my children, not as long as I'd planned on...but long enough to be completely comfortable nursing in public. 

I wore clothing specifically made for breastfeeding, and if I had a regular shirt on, I'd wear a "wifebeater" tank underneath w/ cutouts for my breasts, that way, no skin was shown. 

When I'd breastfeed in public I showed less skin than most women show when wearing the current fashion of clothing...many women are showing much more breast than I did just by wearing low cut and high rise tops.  

I am offended when people say nursing mothers should sit in a car or a bathroom. You try sitting in a car w/ a baby on your lap on a 100 degree day, or in a stinky bathroom. It takes about 20 minutes for a baby to eat....you go, every 2 hours and sit alone for 20 minutes. It's not the way you will want to live.  

Babies need to eat, mothers who love their babies enough to want to give them the very best start in life should not be quarantined out of sight just because someone has issues with their breasts and sexuality.  

Though I am no longer nursing, I am happy to see any nursing mothers, anywhere they want to nurse. I've never seen anyone "Plop their breast on the table" or "pop it out" the way some describe. Every mother I've ever seen nursing has been very discreet and sometimes you can't even really tell they're nursing. I know I had the experience several times when nursing my son in public where someone would walk up and be totally surprised when I told them I ws feeding, they thought he was just sleeping in my lap!