When I was 10 years old, my grandfather was sent to prison for "Manslaughter" even though all the evidence pointed to self-defense. He served 4 years of a 12 year sentence, during which time the woman he was married to - and who had hired his attorney - sold a large tract of timbered property that he owned, divorced him, and kept the proceeds from the land. Because he was incarcerated, there was nothing he could do about it. It was difficult for the entire family to not be bitter about the circumstances, but, because are all Christians and believe in unconditional forgiveness, we have forgiven everyone involved.
When our oldest son was 6 years old, he ran out in front of a speeding car and was killed - instantly. No charges were filed against the man who hit him - in a construction zone. However, through an accumulation of accidents in construction zones, in Oregon, the laws are now much stronger than they were 30 years ago. At first, I experienced rage: at the man who hit him, at God, at the circumstances which put my son in that construction zone. However, I quickly realized that I was the only one my anger was hurting. My husband, our other son, our daughter, and I forgave everyone involved many years ago. We don't know why these things happen, but we know that "all things work together for good for those who love the Lord..." And we know that many, many good things have happened in our lives because of our reactions to our loss.
Daniel's family - especially his mother and his sister - need to forgive and forget. They needn't forget Daniel, but they need to forget everything surrounding the accident. Until they can experience the healing power of forgiveness - even if they never verbally express it to Brandi and her family - they will continue to grow more and more bitter and angry. Those emotions are certainly not conducive to good relationships with anyone. Bitterness and anger only make people UGLY!
I am praying for Brandi and her parents that she will be able to get a new trial, or, at least be released on parole. It looks to me like her attorney just wanted a quick end to the case and pushed her to accept what HE wanted. How can a 17 year old fully understand all the consequences of her actions?!? And why did they send her to prison as though she were an adult? If she had been sentenced as a teenager, shouldn't she have been out by now?
(Original Air Date: 10/13/05) In a heartbeat, your entire life can change. No one knows this better than the families of Brandi and Daniel. Seventeen-year-old Brandi was a cheerleader, an excellent student and an all-American girl. She was in love with athletic 18-year old Daniel. Now he’s dead and she finds herself behind bars serving a 12-year sentence, all because of what happened in just a split second. Was it murder or simply a horrific accident? Hear members of both families describe how the tragedy unfolded, and the struggle to put together the pieces of their shattered lives. Plus, Dr. Phil visits Brandi in prison to ask some very hard questions. She has an emotional message for Daniel's mother -- and for Daniel. Talk about the show here.
