Thank you Dr. Phil for allowing both parties to speak out releasing frustration and anger not only at the system but with themselves. As parents we want to protect and stand up for our children even when mistakes occur. One of the hardest things to recognize in one's own children is their weaknesses ... after all they are human, the same as their adult role models.
This is truly a very sad situation but one that the parents need to come to terms with for the sake of their other children at home.
Suicide is a difficult concept to wrap ones mind around, especially for those that are left behind. My belief is that this young man demonstrated and provided indicators not only to Brandi and his own parents, and probably to the school community in retrospect, and probably to the police force given the statements of Brandi's parents, of an instability. To Daniel's Mother who is fighting so hard to cruicify Brandi, if your son did commit suicide ... you are not to blame. This does not make you any less a caring mother or a responsible mother. His action does not put the quality of your motherhood in jeopardy. As a mother you can not control the reasoning of your young adult's mind - you could never be inside his mind. He may have made a decision in a split second that cost him his life. He may have only wanted to slightly hurt himself thus controlling Brandi into not leaving him, and instead caring for him. He was probably devasted by the breakup and was trying to keep the relationship together at any cost. We will never know. But he did step out in front of the car for whatever reason.
As for Brandi, she made some very poor choices and was very immature in her reaction to the situation. Do I believe she drove home in a fog? Yes, I think shock took its toll and panic set in, instead of rational thinking. She has paid her dues and will pay her dues everyday for the rest of her life as she wakes up each morning and goes to sleep each night. I sincerely hope that she is receiving councelling and education to help her make a positive influence on others in some way in her life. I believe she did that yesterday with courage to help other young people and also help parents to understand the importance of keeping the communication lines open at all times. Brandi needs to know that as long as she knows in her heart that she is telling the truth then she can hold her head high and move on in her life. Truth to oneself is the greatest healier of all. I hope that Brandi's parents and brother can now help Brandi by moving forward with their lives and not letting the incident incapacitate their lives. If they do this, perhaps they will allow Brandi to heal as well and move forward in a positive and responsible direction with her life.
My thoughts and prayers go out to both famlies, sincerely, ohsunset
(Original Air Date: 10/13/05) In a heartbeat, your entire life can change. No one knows this better than the families of Brandi and Daniel. Seventeen-year-old Brandi was a cheerleader, an excellent student and an all-American girl. She was in love with athletic 18-year old Daniel. Now he’s dead and she finds herself behind bars serving a 12-year sentence, all because of what happened in just a split second. Was it murder or simply a horrific accident? Hear members of both families describe how the tragedy unfolded, and the struggle to put together the pieces of their shattered lives. Plus, Dr. Phil visits Brandi in prison to ask some very hard questions. She has an emotional message for Daniel's mother -- and for Daniel. Talk about the show here.
