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Topic : 06/06 "I'm Gay, OK?"

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Created on : Friday, October 14, 2005, 03:56:41 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1

(Original Air Date: 10/19/05) Sexual orientation used to be something kept hidden from family and co-workers, but now more and more people are "coming out" and finding acceptance. Anjela says her mother and sister don't support her sexual orientation, and feel she can't be Christian and gay at the same time. Can they reconcile this touchy issue? Then, two men debate whether a person can go from gay to straight, and parents of a 4-year-old boy fear their son's desire to play with dolls and wear heels means he'll grow up to be gay. Are they overreacting to his wishes to be a princess instead of a prince? Talk about gender and gay issues here.


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October 19, 2005, 3:24 pm PDT

With God's help, anyone can change

 I beleive everything God tells me from his word the Bible. In the Bible, at 1 Corinthians 6: 9-10, he outlines that certain sinners, including "men who lie with men" will not inherit his kingdom. But at verse 11 he says "That is what some of you were (indicating change). You have been washed clean...you have been declared righteous in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ". If God is saying that homosexuals can change, then they can once they rely on him fully and want to change. Don't get me wrong...I do not think that I am better than homosexuals. I too had to change from my life of sex outside of marriage (fornication also mentioned in the scripture). It was difficult, and I will admit the feelings are still there, but with God's help I was able to stop the harmful behaviour. And so can any homosexual, but with the help of God! In the end, we all need to remember that we are all sinners, and God hates, not the sinner, but the sin.
 
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October 19, 2005, 3:25 pm PDT

Thank you

Quote From: irishmom

 That is an incredibly hypocritical statement!  You say that gays shouldn't be judged and "generalized" (and I agree), and then you go on to label Christians and generalize them in a very unfair way.  True, there are Christians that are "nosy and hostile" as you say.  But there are also atheists, Buddhists, gays, lesbians, blacks, whites...you name it, who are guilty of the same!!  I'm a Christian and I AM NOT nosy or hostile!  I mind my own business and I'm a decent person!  I don't have an enemy in the world!  Don't make such generalizations about a group of people if you don't wish to have them made about you. 
You said it better than I did.
 
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October 19, 2005, 3:25 pm PDT

Thank you

Quote From: irishmom

 That is an incredibly hypocritical statement!  You say that gays shouldn't be judged and "generalized" (and I agree), and then you go on to label Christians and generalize them in a very unfair way.  True, there are Christians that are "nosy and hostile" as you say.  But there are also atheists, Buddhists, gays, lesbians, blacks, whites...you name it, who are guilty of the same!!  I'm a Christian and I AM NOT nosy or hostile!  I mind my own business and I'm a decent person!  I don't have an enemy in the world!  Don't make such generalizations about a group of people if you don't wish to have them made about you. 
You said it better than I did.
 
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October 19, 2005, 3:25 pm PDT

I had girlfriend's too, but....

Quote From: kissmyace

I know most of this is about the lesbian girl, but I want to say something about the 4 year old boy that acts like a girl, a little advice if any of you have a boy that acts the same way.  Well, I'm only 14, but I have a younger brother that's 11 years old and when he was around 3 or 4 years old, he was exactly the same way.  He would go into my closet and get my dresses and put them on and he wore high heels.  He had a blanket that had a little pocket-like thing that he would put on his head, making it look like he had long hair.  And whenever I had my mom paint my fingernails, he'd come and want his painted, too.  I remember one time where my dad said "how about we paint your toes instead?" because then you would't be able to see them since he wears tennis shoes.  He would argue and say he wanted his fingernails painted, but I don't think my dad ever agreed, but if he did, he took it off soon after.  I remember my mom getting irritated, probably cause she was also worried about him becoming gay.  She isn't homophobic, but she feels the same as the lesbians mom and sister do: that being gay goes against God's word.  I know my brother admitted to wanting to be a girl and he liked to play with my barbies (also pulling off their heads) and seemed to act like a young girl rather than a young boy.  I HIGHLY doubt that any of you should worry if you see these actions in your little boy.  My brother is 11 and he's had 2 girlfriends (yeah, I was really surprised cause he doesn't seem like much of a "girl magnet") and shows no signs of being gay.  He makes jokes about it, but I know he's not.  As Dr.Phil said, it's probably just a phase.  Take his advice and don't worry about it.  I know that I was worried, even though I was 7 or 8, but honestly, it's just a phase.  I hope that hearing my story has relieved you and let you know that things will most likely work out ok.
I had girlfriends too but guess what... It was a cover up because of all the pressure to be straight.  I'm 27 and have known I've been gay since I was 6 - before I even knew much about sex at all.
 
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October 19, 2005, 3:26 pm PDT

10/19 "I'm Gay, OK?"

Quote From: jeremiah

If you read your Bible you cannot be Gay and be Christian.  It is against God. 

  

God is much bigger than that which can fit in the pages of a slightly thick book called the bible. 
 
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October 19, 2005, 3:27 pm PDT

Hebrew Scripture = Christian's Old Testament!

Quote From: mindsopen

I am always amazed as responses to homosexual lifestyles.  I shouldn't be...but I guess I always hope that people will open up their minds...even a little. 

  

I've been reading the numerous pages of responses to the original post.   WOW!  Talk about emotions!   

  

First of all I'd like to respond to the person who posted about using a Hebrew Old Testament.  Obviously, for those of us who study...you are referring to a Hebrew edition of the Christian Bible as Jews do not have an Old Testament.  So, don't go there.   

  

Another point I'd like to make is about all the quoting going on.  My goodness!  Anyone can quote.  It's a matter of knowing what you quote.  For example, I'm going to quote Luke 14:26 from the NIV: 

  

"If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother, his wife and children, his brothers and sisters--yes, even his own life--he cannot be my disciple." 

  

Hmmmm makes you wonder...   So, please don't quote the Bible as your excuse to condemn gays and lesbians., people who drink alcohol, etc.  There will always be hate in this world and it's been around before the Bible.  The Bible just gives some an excuse. 

  

In freethinking love, 

  

  

As a Believer in Jesus the Christ, I do not self-identify by the Syrian Greek-speaking pagan created hateful epithet, "Christian," when I refer to the "Old Testament" which Jesus himself called the "Old Covenant," I am referring to the writings which the Jews consider to be their Scripture.  

  

All of The Jewish writings written before 30 AD were referred to as the Old Covenant by Jesus himself. He also referred to the 1st 5 books, traditionally called the books of Moses by many, as the "Law."  

  

In a way, the "Law" was the same as the Old "Covenant." For those who wish to be believers in Jesus the Christ, they are not required to obey the Pre-Jesus Covenant-Law. But, Jesus said that those who wished to live by the LAW given before he came would be judged by that LAW. He did not do away with that LAW; but, his new Covenant-Law, aka New Testament (not the Bible Collection, but, his commands) was a higher LAW which made the Jewish Law not important for His Followers.  

  

Christians, especially those who think homosexuality is a sin and say "Because My Bible says so," pick and choose which parts of the LAW in Pre-Jesus time they want to live by. Never mind the fact that they commit lots of those "abominations" listed in the book of Leviticus almost every day. 

 
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October 19, 2005, 3:27 pm PDT

We are all sinners saved by grace

Quote From: jeremiah

If you read your Bible you cannot be Gay and be Christian.  It is against God. 

  

 You can not hate your brother and go to heaven, cause in God's eyes if you hate your brother you are a murderer.  But..the good news is that Jesus died on the cross to forgive EVERY SIN and save us from ALL unrighteouness and clean us from all evil. 

Read John 3:3 and Romans 10:9-13  (King James Version)

There is nothing too bad for Jesus to forgive and no sin is worse than the other...sin is sin is sin.  Jesus died to forgive us of our sin and give us NEW LIFE (Born Again) and in HIM (Jesus) we have agape love, joy, and Peace...and peace beyond man's understanding.  :)  The greatest gif t is God's LOVE and foregiveness. Have a great day.
 
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October 19, 2005, 3:28 pm PDT

Sorry, but

Quote From: jordanj

I was a little surprised that Dr. Phil said this was a phase for the 4 year old who dressed up in womens clothes and asked why God didn't make him a girl.  The child is being his authentic self without reservation.  He likes what he likes, girls toys, clothes, etc.  He doesn't like what he doesn't like, boys toys.  That's it.  He is being who he really is without societal pressure telling him who he should or should not be.  His mother is homophobic.  Well that's probably why God gave her a child likely to be gay, to teach her to love.  Because being homophobic is about hate and anger, not love.   

  

I am 27, and was exactly like that 4 year old, and guess what, I'm gay.  I don't know why, I just always new since I was 6.  However, I don't like wearing womens clothes now as an adult - they're just too revealing LOL.  But I played with girls toys, didn't like the boys toys.  Loved being friends with girls, didn't like hanging out with boys but was always attracted.  So let people be who they are.  God made each of us unique and out of love.  As long as you aren't hurting anybody, it's ok.  The mother - is hurting herself by hanging on to the homophobia anger and hate.  The child is just being himself and she'll end up hurting him unless she lets the love in.   

  

Accept what God created and stop judging. Love one another for all our glorious uniqueness.   

Not everyone is like you! My son loved Strawberry Shortcake when he was 3 and put on lipstick today (he's 5), but he's as boy as you get, playing with cars, trains, and his tractor outside.
 
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October 19, 2005, 3:28 pm PDT

10/19 "I'm Gay, OK?"

Quote From: indmiracle

I so agree with you.  You seem to have yourself together at an early age.  Your parents must be very proud of you. 

  

I had a very dear friend I lost 2 years ago.  He was gay.  But, he did not feel the need to shout it to the world.  Everyone knew.  He did not try to hide it.  He often made mention of his partner at work.  He did not keep it hid.  He lived like many other so called "normal" people.  He simply lived.    

Yes my parents are very proud of me. lol! Are you a parent?  

  

I am on the High School Newspaper in my school and I even wrote an article on homosexuals in our school and it went over with our school quite well.  

  

I'm sorry you lost your friend. He sounded like a good person. My mom's a nurse, and being so she has dealt with many homosexuals due to STD's and AIDS and she always has a hard time too when she loses one of them, as they become her friends. Being young, I haven't lost any homosexual friends yet and I can't even imagine what that would be like.  

  

I'm glad that he was more than just an acitivist. Not saying that activists are bad, I just believe it's important to maintain a variety of different aspects to your personality in life. You're never going to get EVERYONE to agree with you, and people need to accept that.  People that are never satisfied until everyone accepts them will never be satisfied and will live a lonely life. No one will accept you until you learn to accept yourself.   

 
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October 19, 2005, 3:31 pm PDT

10/19 "I'm Gay, OK?"

Quote From: momisme2

I think you make a very fair statement and anyone who would judge all Christians based on the few they read here strike me as judgemental as those they are complaining about. 

  

Btw... im not Christian or homosexual (nor do I have any desire to be either   ;) but I do know alot of great non Bible Thumping Christians and have several homosexual friends.   

then your confused, I will pray for you my friend. And this comes from a True Christian and not from as you call it " a bible thumper ".
 
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