Topic : 06/06 "I'm Gay, OK?"

I am a fully hetero female and don't understand the homophobia.  I consider myself a Christian, and as a Christian I believe that God alone judges us.  I also believe that we are all made in God's image, which means we are, I guess you could say, a little piece of God. 

  

I've travelled a lot and count many gays and lesbians among my friends, and choose to have them as my friends based on their quality, not their sexuality.  I've also discussed openly with a number of them who I'm glad were comfortable enough with me to discuss their preferences.  I learned that some were simply born in the wrong body.  I've met some who were abused as children and that abuse determined their sexuality.  I've met some who denied it and tried the hetero lifestyle, but found soulmates who were same-sex.   

  

I believe that an individual is the sum total of their entire being, and what and how they feel and act goes into their character.  I've met gays and lesbians I dislike immensely, but I've also met heterosexuals that I can't stand!   It's their character I look at, not their sexuality. 

  

I know a lesbian couple who has had a loving, monogamous relationship for 36 years, and I've never had a heterosexual relationshiop that was nearly that deep.  I also know many other divorced heteros.  Love is not gender specific. 

  

As for getting into Heaven, it is where we are.  God, too, is not going to judge us on the basis of our orientation; after all, He created us.  And as for the number of sexual partners, I don't find it any more or less serious for the individual, whether gay or straight.  To say a person cannot be a gay and a Christian is God's call, no one elses.   

  

 I don't buy the sin-nature thing.  I also feel that being homosexual is far less "sinful" than being homophobic.  Homophobia is not just a fear, it is a judgment of another human being.  It is a form of bigotry.  Now the gay marriage thing is an issue.  If God is our ultimate Judge, which He plainly states he is, when did it become our place to prejudge God?  Homophobia is bigotry, and bigotry is hatred.  There was a point it seemed we were getting past that.  Now this administration has made it an issue and wants to write homophobia into our Constitution.  This ends a democracy. 

  

The conservatives are saying this endangers the family.  The family is endangered by loss of jobs, lower wages, loss of benefits, overcrowding in the public schools, failing education system, and the list goes on and on.  They say that gay couples raise gay children!  Dick Cheney has a lesbian daughter, so one could conclude that he and his wife are homosexual.  That's the thinking, and it is illogical.   

  

The people who are wanting to constitutionalize a definition of marriage based on their values are the same ones who are killing others in Iraq. 

  

Sexuality should be left private and orientation is a personal matter.  It can be discussed openly without making it an issue.  Let's face it, sex isn't something we should be talking about in public, whether it's gay or straight.  

  

God loves us all!  And if my opinion is wrong, that, too, will be decided by God.  

The fact that you are married is you putting your sex life out there. You tell everyone by wearing your wedding ring that you have sex with a man.

Do you hold your husband's hand in public? Kiss him? Hug him? Tell him you love him in front of other people?

Well...that is you putting your sex life "out there" isn't it.

It's what any gay person, including the people on this show want to do too.

Mostly I refrane from posting on any message boards, simply because 99% of the time you arent going to change anyone's onpinon. But today when I turned on the Dr.Phil show... 

  

I will be the first to admit it, I have absoulutly no proff one way or the other if a person can be changed from gay to straight. It is my personal opinon that if you CAN change, you were bisexual to begin with (you can't rule that out as a posibility for every singel person who has 'changed').  

  

But what is truly sad about the entire argument is that anyone would WANT to change, much less be encouraged to. What kind of a society do we really live in if it's exceptable to change something as personal as your orentation? All things considered, that's not so far off from a black person having an operation to become white, we all know it can be done, but just the idea is taboo itself. 

  

Just from a glance through the first few pages, this is turning into a religiuos debate, (shame shame) And while I don't have a very great amount of right to comment on that (seeing as I'm a Wiccan) All I can say is this: The man who translated the bible from Latin to the common dialect, was burned at the stake, by the church, and when he was burried, the officeals dug him up and tossed him on the side of the rode. So any translations the first time around were not exacly verifyed by the priest at the time. I have also heard that the the condamnation of homosexuality was accually a referance to a kind of paga temple prostitution. But as I said, only speculation. 

  

And last but not least (I feel there is a need to add this in) I am a hetirosexual 16-year-old female, who comes from a quietly homophobic family. But I still look at decriminating against someone because they are gay or bisexual the same way as descriminating against someone who is black/white, rich/poor, christain/musslim/whaterver. It's all wrong. It dosn't matter the exuseses anyone uses, or the way they do it. It's still wrong.  

Errrg -- I have to say that the Mother and Sister first on the show P.O.ed me off big time! 

I mean, the little sister talked more than the big sister! I think that Angela didn't have a chance to actually explain exactly what problems she had. What she would want her younger sister and Mom to do in order to make their relationships better. 

  

Grrrrrr --- honestly! 

  

If gays were born gay, were pedophiles born pedophile?  What's the difference in the attractions and desires that these two groups feel?  Don't explain to me that one is between adults and one with underaged children and that's why one of them is right and the other wrong.  My question is, if one is born with sexual feelings to be gay, is one also born with sexual feelings towards children or animals.   

  

If being gay is not a choice, are alcoholism, obesity, smoking, etc, not choices as well?   

If someone is born pre-disposed to these "abnormalities", are they forced into doing them, or do they CHOOSE to act upon them? 

  

Are surgical gender reassignment individuals uncomfortable at birth with their sex, or are their feelings generated as a result of society and their environment?   

  

Would our creator be so cruel as to cause confusion?  1 Corinthians 14:33.  NO. 

  

I know someone with diabetes.  She craves sweets like they're going out of style.  She has a strong desire just as strong as gays have a desire and nymphomaniacs have a desire.  Infants are born with diabetes.  Do they have a choice to refrain from the activity of eating sweets as they grow older?  Yes, even though they were born with these "defects", they can turn things around. 

  

These are nothing but excuses, "I was born this way, God made me this way, I've tried to change but I can't."  Yessssssssss, Youuuuuuuu Cannnnnnnnn.   Weren't you ever told that you can be whatever you want to be when you grow up?  Sometimes it takes years to overcome addictions and OCD activities.  It's like a diet or lifestyle change,  if you give up, it's because you had no intentions of ever following through or completing the task.   

  

My husband pointed out something interesting to me today while watching the show. My mother grew up in a very tiny small backwoods town in WI. She is left handed. She got reprimanded for using her left hand once she started school. The teacher would slap her left hand with a ruler if she got caught doing it.

The teacher was superficially successful. My mother learned how to write and do other things with her right hand. But deep down my mom still knew and still is left handed.  She couldn't control what hand is natural for her to use, but she was forced to use her right hand. She had a teacher who told her that being left handed was evil and she had scripture to back it up! (I would have to ask my mother if she remembers the scripture, but she remembers the teacher preaching it to her and a little boy who was also left handed.)

I don't see how this "conversion therapy" is any different than that.

I'm really very liberal and I have never heard or seen anyone say that gays should be killed. I am however GREATLY disturbed by the fact that half this country is against gay marriage and in my mind that IS the church taking over.

You're so far off the mark. Being gay akin to being left-handed or having wide hips or hair that won't curl.... Most people don't think it's desirable, but it's the way people are configured. THAT'S the reason you can't cure it. People can be forced to write with their right hand, spend thousands of dollars and hours trying to slim their hips, and buy all kinds of products to treat their hair. But as time goes on, you are what you are ... learn to love it!   

   

And you gay people who keep saying that you'd change if you Could: I feel your pain but that's only adding to the public's perception that being gay is a bad thing. You understand your innate attractions -- they can only latch on to what you say. And if there's even a hint of negativity, they're happy to exploit it.  

   

That silly ex-gay "priest" wholeheartedly misrepresented the truth of his mission. The two male founders of Exodus ex-gay ministries, Mike Bussee and Gary Cooper, gave up their own creation back in the 1980s -- they fell in love with one another and decided to tell the world they were totally wrong. What's that tell you? Ex-gay ministries get a lot of attention and make a lot of money peddling their political fakery.  

   

Why would anyone choose to be gay? Because they're honest with themselves and able to ignore society's disapproval of the things that are at the core of their existence.  

how it should have read is(ok im gay do you still love me or are you goin to stop loving me now that you know,) its got to be a very hard thing for a person to do to tell thear parents that thear gay, but you dont stop loving them, you dont throw them away,my ancer would be it took alot of courrage to tell me yes its ok i dont like it but its ok and i still love you  maybe just alittle bit more for having the courrage to trust in me enough to tell me, its relly not a isswe of being ok its a issue of love,thear still your kids or brothers or sisters no matter how they choose to live thats thear choice not oursi guess what some of us view as wrong may not be viewed as wrong by others, i love my fellow man or woman nomatter how they are,