Message Boards

Topic : 05/31 Falsely Accused

Number of Replies: 526
New Messages This Week: 0
Last Reply On:
Created on : Friday, October 28, 2005, 02:16:37 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1

(Original Air Date: 11/2/2005) False accusations have ruined lives and divided families. No one knows this better than Terry. She claims she was falsely labeled as a gossip at her son, Steve's, rehearsal dinner and was escorted out of his wedding by security! Now, she confronts her son and daughter-in-law for the first time in almost five months. Can this family ever reconcile, or are they better off apart? Then, a former high school principal made headlines when a 16-year-old student accused him of having sex with her. The scandal rocked the town, and now he struggles to regain his reputation and move forward.  Share your thoughts here.

 

Find out what happened on the show.

 

More May 2006 Show Boards.


As of January, 2009, this message board will become "Read Only" and will be closed to further posting. Please join the NEW Dr. Phil Community to continue your discussions, personalize your message board experience, start a blog and meet new friends.

June 8, 2006, 9:56 pm CDT

agreed

Quote From: lucky24

You may think this mom came off as "reasonable" but Dr. Phil sure didn't.    It was obvious to me he did not buy for one minute that Terry was an innocent "victim" in this situation.  He kept saying, "oh, come on" to try to get her to see how unbelievable some of her claims of innocence were.  

  

When I am watching Dr. Phil interview people I tend to take my cues from him as to which direction the truth leans.  This is because he does have all the background and history and does very thorough research on the people who come on his show.     

  

But more important than that, Steve has known his mother all his life.  He knows what she is capable of and what she can be predicted to do based on her past choices and behaviors.   If he felt she couldn't be trusted to behave there was probably a very good reason for that opinion. 

  

You lack the comprehension of how complex these type family dynamics truly are when you say people are "reading way too much into this".  There are reasons that go well beyond the mom making an inappropriate comment to the aunt that she was asked not to attend the wedding.    Blaming the new d-i-l for any of this is just an attempt to divert attention away from the real problem; the mother and son's rocky relationship and all the history that made it what it was by the time the wedding day arrived.   There is more going on in this family than you realize. 

I agree.  It seemed to me that the mom was not willing to accept any responsibility for her part in the situation or any situation for that matter.   

  

Not sure I would have removed the mom from the wedding, but I am not Steve and don't know the history behind their relationship.  I think he felt justified and that he had given her plenty of notice, both the dinner by warning her not to gossip and then after by leaving message after message telling her not to come to the ceremony.   

  

I believe Terry is probably angry at the mom because of the history and wanted to protect him from the hurt/pain/whatever. caused by his family.  I don't think it is her role to fix or come between the relationship between Steve and his mom, but I can understand the rational for why she has done what she has. She did what she believed what right for her husband. 

Terry needs to get over her anger over what has happend to Steve and let Steve deal with the problems in the family relationships if he can.   

She will need to support him in his decisions that way.   

  

Steve  needs to forgive his mom and get rid of his hurt and anger for his own sake.  Those emotions take so much energy away from the good things in life.  Steve may need to always set boundaries with his mom because I have serious doubts if mom will ever accept responsibilty for her actions, but who knows stranger things have happened. 

 
June 12, 2006, 7:39 pm CDT

Yes choose life with standards and integrity

Quote From: sunshine17

Choose life? Integrity? Are you kidding? As mom is lead away by an armed policeman for nothing more than a comment? It's interesting that you think it's okay for a kid to treat his very reasonable, but not perfect, mom like that. She's just like everyone on earth, her life isn't perfect, but she obviously tries. You are reading way too much into this, it was all supposed to be about the wedding and the mom did nothing to ruin anything. And it's interesting how one comment made to the infamous aunt has caused Steve to have no relationship with his own mother whatsoever, and you seem to think that's okay. Hope you can live up to your own standards, you may end up alone and lonely yourself, cause I sure can't see how embarassing and scaring your mom like that is in any way choosing life, it's just showing that there are some real issues with the new wifey. Can you say passive aggressive? She's a real cold character, that one!

It is true I am living by standards that align with my writings. As for alone - my life is filled with genuine people who care for me and I care for.  Our relationships are filled with grace and forgiveness for one another.  I am not alone - unless you speak of those who reject my standards and abandoned my presence due to my lack of choosing them over my own wife and children and lets not leave out - my bio dad. My story parallels Steve's story - Loving my bio dad was just too much for the rest of them. My ability to accept all was construded to be a "reject" of some - when that did not have to be the case - but when others make it a case - then someone is going to have to loose - that is what manipulation is all about - you need to check your vision to see if you have discernment over who in this story is actually the "passive agressive" and what the motivations of each are.  My guess is the d i l is feeling inadequate - "the cause" the blame - and is NOT digging it one bit.... and she wouldn't have written herself into the script in this manner if she had a choice. Face it -nobody likes rejection - but the word integrity comes when people won't allow someone else to dictate to them who to love and who not to. It is clear you have not considered that Steve's first choice would be that he could have a mother and a father in his own life - and neither of those relationships harm's (or should harm) his relationship with the other. But if that is too much for the other parent and siblings... then HIS integrity must stand for who he is. I hate issues like this - I am not one bit happy to part of a situation like this - but I would not understand love nor be able to love if my life's view of love was twisted and conditional by the family dynamics that I now understand so well. It hurts me to see stories such as this one - Yes I am all for forgiveness - I am about seeing love win - but one can't make someone else love you above their own justification, anger, pain, and lack of forgiveness.   

 
June 13, 2006, 8:10 pm CDT

the same happen to me this year

The principle at my school told the police one day that I did two things when I was at school, I never even did what he said I did and he said this to the police officer(which was a lie) and he never had any  proof that it happen. He loves looking big at the school and so much has he knows that hardly anyone includeing the students and parents dont have no time for him because he dont bother to look after the school he just sits back and now the school is full of problems and he just making stuff up.This school is out of control BIG TIME!!!
 
July 24, 2006, 4:47 am CDT

Developments?

 Hi,

I am a teacher from Ireland.  We are quite behind in the episodes of Dr. Phil shown on our network.  This morning I saw the show on people who are wrongly accused.  I was heartbroken, as a teacher, to see Dr. Eboni and his wife speaking of how their world came undone following the false allegations of a 16 year old student. I was so pleased to see Dr. Phil stand by this man and appeal on his behalf to employers across the country.  Please could somebody let me know if Dr. Eboni has been successful in finding a new job?  My heart truly goes out to this couple.

Thanks!
 
December 1, 2008, 1:19 pm CST

Falsely accused, my story

I write to let everyone know the horrors of being falsely accused.  It has just emotionally crippled me. I was an elementary school teacher and became friends with a parent in my classroom. She was a persian woman unhappily married to her husband, persian also.  They had several children..  I helped the woman get a job at school, as her husband gave her very little money as he was well educated but did not work. I became good friends with the family over the years. Her children even called me auntie. We took vacations together and became good friends. This is where the story takes a horrible turn. Her husband became an attorney, after dropping out of business school and medical school. I spent the weekend at her house.  her husband was in Iran for two months. Long story short, she accuses me of stealing her jewelry. First it was a few items, then a 100,000 wedding ring, then lalique crystal..the list goes on. She contacts my family (she became friends with them through me) and tells them this crazy story. My parents are in their seventies and wealthy. I send the persian family any gifts I have received from them over the years and tell them I did not take anything and that I want nothing to do with them.  The wife leaves me a message that there was a video but I did not do anything so I could care less.  Two months later, she files a police report, now 100,000 dollars of jewelry that has been missing for years.  Police call me and I tell the police officer that she is trying to extort money from me.  No charges filed, no video, end of story or so I thought. One year later, I receive a civil lawsuit charging me with tort, 200,000 worth of jewelry.  I had to hire an attorney.  He represented his wife. I had a private attorney and one paid by my insurance.  It was a nightmare. He was fined fours times for sanctions of 700 dollars each (did not pay until we reached settlement).  How the judge allowed it to continue, I will never know. When it reached time for depositions, a neighbor was now a mystery witness that the husbamd represented in her numerous DUIs, still no video. I believe that her children did it for drugs or she never had the items. Since my father was gravely ill, we reached a settlement as the stress was unbearable.  He still practices the law but  this has just made me physically ill. I became a psychologist and find myself unable to forgive these monsters.  I have so little trust of people today. If you have not been accused of a crime, you don't know what it can do to you. lawyers can sue anyone for anything.  They know how to manipulate the system. I can't believe this has happened to me.  I did not have the strength to fight it.  If you have not been through it, you just don't know how it can eat you up inside.  My lawyers believed that after depositions, the case would be dismissed but the stress of depositions is incredible.  He was able to represent his entire family but he wanted to call my ex boyfriends, parents, teachers at school, principal, etc...This whole story makes me sick! Unbelievable
 
June 13, 2009, 2:41 pm CDT

Not Guilty!

Quote From: kimiden

Does it amaze you that when a story like this breaks, the name of the "victim" is protected, but the name of the alleged perpetrator is plastered all over the newspapers and the news broadcasts.  In this case, the allegations were false, but the damage has been done.  And the "victim" is still protected.  The alleged perpetrator's name should not be released unless he/she is found guilty. This is just  unbelievable to me! 

I agree that something needs to be done to the "victims" if they are found to be lying, etc.  The "victim" and the "alleged abuser" should both be kept anonomous, until the case has completely been finalized, with court proceedings, etc.  Even indictments are listed in local newspapers weekly and an indictment is in no shape or form a guilty verdict.  A retired judge I read about years ago said, "A district attorney / prosecutor

can get a Grand Jury to indict a ham sandwiche."  Funny, but so very true. The district attorney has complete sway over the Grand Jury and what he/she wants them to return with, a "True Bill" or a "No Bill".

 

Until these so called "victims" are stopped and held accountable, there will continnue to be false accusations and charges brought against innocent people, for any number of reasons.

 
First | Prev | 48 | 49 | 50 | 51 | 52 | 53 | Next Page | Last Page