Topic : 08/25 Extreme Food Obsessions

Quote From: kellebelle

Nichelle,

I admire your bravery to publicly open your home life and the struggles that you have dealt with. You were open to change, asking for a new way to deal with the issues that I know you understand are not Savannah's fault.

I think what most people want for you is support for you to learn how to create a structure for your family. That structure gives Savannah comfort and help to learn that there is an order to the day as well as other priorities that have to be incorporated into the day. This structuregives your other child the chance to see that family life has a routine that is normal and creates safe boundaries, and gives you relief in knowing that Savannah is learning the routine, your other child is comfortable in the family stability, and that you can take any challenge in the day and refer back to the routine.

Having worked with street youth dealing with recovery from addiction, and no structure in how to live on a daily basis, I acknowledge that developing the routine and introducing it to an individual - regardless of age, mental developmental level, or other barriers to learning - is the most difficult challenge in starting to gain control and stability in a family. However, the routine is crucial for assisting people who are dealing with behaviour-control issues because the structure is safety. Another key point to making the routine work is posting it in a main area of the house, usually in the kitchen. Use picture magnets, coloured markers, and symbols if that's easier for everyoneto recognize and understand.

This isn't something specific for PWS kids or kids in addiction recovery, this is something thatis often recommended for every family.My friends use it with their kids showing the daily schedule for going to school, after-school activities, family chores, mealtimes, learning self-care (e.g. brushing teeth and bathing), and bedtime. They see the routine, they recognize it, and it becomes part of everyday life, which is the ultimate goal.

It will be difficult, but I think you have lived through the worst part of it, and are ready to find better tools to help your children become amazing people. There have been some great supportive messages from other people who have worked with or who have children with PWS, and I hope that you're able to find the resources that are available to you.You have beautiful kids, I know you love them, and I believe that when we have better tools, we do great things.

I think you can do great things.

Kelle

Quote From: yarles

perhaps all you people who critizised nichelle should be put in her shoes for a while.nichelle is suffering from burnout.atleast she asked for help and admitted that she was not managing to deal properly with her child.as for dr.phil yelling at her on stage about her conduct,maybe he should try being in her shoes as well.it's not easy.i feel for her.she needs help with the child and some time out from for both their sakes.

Quote From: wiseant

 Today, after watching the Dr. Phil show, was the first time I had ever heard of PWS.   I started to wonder if it was possible that my 13 year old daughter could have this disease because she seems to have an obsession with food and would eat constantly if I did not limit her.  She is overweight and nothing seems to deter her desire to eat.  I have had her tested to see if she had a thyroid problem, something I have, and was told that she was fine.  The difference in her behavior compared to the children on the show is that she doesn't become quite so angry  and upset when she is denied food so I'm wondering is there a degree of severity?  In other words, could someone, say, have a trace and is this something that developes over time or do the symptoms present themselves early in a child's life?  I hope this isn't a silly question but I'm  so worried about my daughter.   She is close to 200 lbs.  We have a membership at a gym, she plays sports but is not very active otherwise.  Also, she doesn't have any of the developmental issues the children on the show have.  That's why I'm asking if it's possible there could be a trace of the disorder without it being full blown.   Any comments will be appreciated.

Quote From: jalyn4wilh

Also,  

I agree with the people who say stop buying junk food.  Sometimes genetic disease are made worse by the environment. You should be reading up on what food research has shown alleviate PW Syndrome.  I thought I heard something from another parent about not eating any dairy products or maybe it was only dairy products.  Reward your daughter by feeding her.  My professional advice is that she always have a cold bottle of water (so she feels full) or milk and a box of a dozen popsicles a day is not going to hurt her.  Tell her she can have unsalted homemade potatoe cubes but  ask her if she first will drink a full cup of kool-aid and then ask her if she wants another, before she can have the potatoes.  Something where you used healthy foods to reward her.  Plan ahead that you will have to feed her veggies and sandwich halves 12 times a day.  

  

I'll go to the university library and research you conditions myself..It may take a week, but I will post my finding. 

  

Please feel free to add me to you mailing list, and contact me some time.  Your path is right up my alley. 

  

Jaclyn

 

Quote From: tsateresa

i grew up an over wieght child.. my father called me fat he told me i was ugly for being fat. i was also picked on by my brother and cousins. they didnt really bother me, but my fahter saying those things to me did. The line " i only say it to help her" is WRONG!!!! it dont help u out it pushes ur self esteem down lower. because of being treated that way by my family i have problems with my mairrage now. i also had lost alot of weight in my teen years and as soon as i felt guys wanted me i went on a binge of sleeping with anyone i could, just to make my self feel better. but i am alos a mother now of a 2yr old, and she is very bad.. she hits me she screams in public if i dont let he have her way.. the list goes on. so i know its hard to have a child that acts up, but if ur saying things of the nature this mother is.. u need to have ur daughter stay with a friend or family member for the weekend and enroll urself in anger managment calles... seriously..or ur gonna loose ur daughter, not only phycically but emionialy too. she will grow up and not forgive u for being so abusive. 

Teresa 

Quote From: mbsmmt

I am sitting here watching the story about the woman with anorexia getting more and more annoyed. I know the woman on TV today acknowledged that she needed help and kudos to her for admitting it and trying to get better. I just wonder how putting her story on TV hurts others with the problem...they may think "she lived that was for 16 years so what is the problem?".   

  

My Aunt is 50 years old and has been somehow living with anorexia for over 30 years...she has so many physical problems yet she thinks that the rest of the world is at fault not her. She eats nothing with any nutritional value...she is the most selfish person I have ever met. My mother and my grandmother (before she died) tried to get her into treatment. Her Doctor is an enabler...he has helped her stay this way. He has not even diagnosed her because she doesn't want to hear it...she won't go to any other doctor because they all call her on her eating disorder.  I think her doctor should be sued for malpractice or maybe arrested for assisted suicide after she dies. My other Aunt bends over backwards to try to help her and she just uses her...it is pathetic. The anorexic one will allow the other to do so much for her that she becomes physically ill and does not take care of herself because she is so focused on the anorexic one.  I have suggested that they commit her...have talked to my therapist about whether or not that could be done...but my grandfather (the only one who could do it) doesn't think she has a problem. He even brags that she is eating better then ever and gaining weight...complete denial! She acts like she is some super great Christian but as far as I am concerned she is a horrible Christian...last time I checked suicide was not among the Christian teachings. She manipulates our family and has contributed to the demise of the family unit that I used to love being a part of.  She has ruined everything...God forbid anyone upset her!  I can't even stand the thought of family gatherings with that side of the family and I used to love them.  

  

I am glad that Kathy got help...but she has been every bit as selfish as my aunt. I hope she realizes the hurt she has caused her family and now will work extra hard to show them appreciation and love. It is so hard to be a family member of someone with this problem...it poisons every part of the relationship and the family! 

Quote From: recovery99

I was so relieved to read your post. I love watching the Dr. phil show, but....I just left my second treatment center that I have been in this year. Anorexia is so glorified on TV...seeing the bones is a huge trigger for me. It seems like TV shows flash pictures of the worst cases on TV and quote weights up and down. here is my thought.....if you wouldn't ask or post the weights of "normal" people (because it is considered RUDE), why in the world would anyone post and talk about the weight of a person who is obviously more sensitive about it than the average population? I feel pulled to watch the show, but am scared to death of being triggered into relapse. I am already holding on for my life as it is....I wish that someone would do a show about anorexia and bulemia without focusing on pictures of people at their sickest.  The public already seems to think that eating disorders are about food. Dr. Phil says that you can't fix money problems with money. I say you can't fix anorexia with food. If only he could say that.... 

  

On a better note, the author of Life Without Ed will be on the show, and that is the best book I've ever read about eating disorders. It's as if the author has climbed into my head and written all of my thoughts on paper.