Topic : 08/25 Extreme Food Obsessions

I'm sorry that you're angry/sad.   We all have bad days where we think we are fat, ugly, unpopular, etc.  I work at a gym of all places and we have this machine that tells the fat% of a person's body weight.  I am here to tell you that for a person of my height 5'2" and weight of about 125-128 age (I'm not telling) it tells me my percent is 39%.  The chart that we have says 35% is the max for people my age in the healthy range. 

  

If I believe that machine totally, I would go away thinking that I am fat.  Sure I have some lumps and bumps (ok they call it cellulite), but not for one minute do I think that I am fat!!!!   

  

Try and get out of the house and take a walk.  Can you join a gym????  I know that exercise works, and do not try and eat too little.  If you eat too little, your body's metabolism slows down, and if you are watching what you eat, it has the opposite effect on you. 

  

Hang in there and take one step at a time.  Look at each day and not so much in the future. 

  

I know my user name is food/how funny is that??  I like pie, that is why I exercise and try and eat healthy, so I can have dessert. 

 Jesland;

Yes, I had seen your previous message.  It was definitely one of those I mentioned in my message that was hopeful.  Another was the message from 'graamy1'  or something, sorry forgot name.  Anyway my hat's off to you and your brother too.  Are u male or female BTW?

I personally know about a dozen children with PWS and all of them are doing very very well.  All have loving parents who would do anything for them and are trying to raise money for research.  My wife and I are so in love with our little girl and she with us.  I tell her EVERYDAY that 'Daddy loves you' and 'you are so beautiful and strong and smart'.   Now that she's finally able to talk understandably, she's returning the words. 'Time to get up Daddy'  this morning.  'Luv u daddy' as well.  And she has recently begun asking me "Daddy am I pretty?"  OH YES! I tell her. You're beautiful.

I do wish you the best of luck in your life with your children, I do know how hard it is as a mother, I have 6 im 33 the youngest is 3 and oldest is 14 and i dont have any with PWS, but I do sometimes go nuts but i dont abuse them ,Try to put yourself in their shoes...when your yelling think how scared she might be and alone she must feel ,do you think you would like that, I dont think so. 

I do think you did the right thing by going to Dr.Phil and asking for help, It took alot of guts knowing you would get alot of fees back that you might not want to hear... 

 Anyway, i am proud of you and look forward to hopefully see you on an Update Show. 

Best of luck 

Angela 

British Columbia 

Canada 

nichelle is obviosly well aware that she is being abusive to her child,else why would she go on national tv and go through the humiliation that she did.she is desperate for some kind,any kind, of help that will let her be able to deal with her daughters' problems better than what she is doing.i say that she was very brave to do what she did and i was annoyed at dr.phil for yelling in her face like that.it was not neccessary and i am surprised at his lack of understanding.

Dear Dr. Phil: 

I am so disturbed after watching your show yesterday.  Nichelle needs some serious help, and I'm sure you are getting that for her.  Lets not forget about that poor little girl.  She needs some protection from her mother.  I hope CPS saw this and will investigate the abuse of this mother.  Being a parent is difficult, add in a special needs child, and you have made it a whole new world.  I have a 6 year old severely special needs child.  I have never belittled or hit my child.  It is not her fault!!!!!!  Life is hard, but that is part of being a parent.  Nichelle made choices in her life that put her in this situation. (not having a special needs child, but having children young with out support)  Mistakes happen, but she is 23 and time to grow up.  I'm so terrified for the little girl.  If what we saw was happening while the cameras were rolling, and she was aware of it, I can't image what happens when the cameras are not there.  Please Dr. Phil, I beg you to not forget about that little girl, and make sure her life is positive, and not the hell she has been subjected to. 

Sincerely, Theresa. 

  

Nichelle, 

  

When I watched your segment on Dr. Phil, I had nothing but sympathy for your situation.  It sounds like you are totally on your own. I don't recall anything being said about the father during the show, but it sounds like he is not around.  It's difficult enough to be a good mother to healty, normal children.  I can't even imagine what you must go through on a daily basis. 

  

You are trying to raise a child under very difficult circumstances, without any special training or education on what could help your situation.  I for one will admit I would not want to have to be in your position.  I can't say that I could do any better.  I have not walked in your shoes. 

  

I hope for you all the best, and hope that you can find some support and education that might make your life easier. 

  

Bless.... 

Hello everybody. I have never posted on this message board before, but after yesterday's show I feel compelled to. I want one point to get across and that is that eating disorders are not a choice. Anorexia nervosa is a brain disorder, the causation lies in the brain. Our brains are abnormal, just like the young girl with PWS. Triggers are the underlying issues, not the causation. The causation is in our brains. It is a disease, and there is no cure (management, yes, but no cure). That is the first point I want to make clear. I have been suffereing with anorexia for over 6 years and have been to many treatment centers and researched more than my fair share of information on anorexia. If you don't believe me about the causation being in the brain, see for yourself at this medical page http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/entrez/query.fcgi?DB=pubmed  

I was very upset with Dr. Phil after yesterday's show. The first thing I  heard Dr. Phil say to Kathy was that she looked wonderful. Hello?? WOnderful, good, great, healthy, etc. all equate FAT in our minds! I was livid by that time and should have turned the channel, but I chose not to. Dr. Phil, don't you understand that eating disorders are not a choice and that any comment on our appereance is not needed and only a trigger? I was also upset by how the show kept flashing Kathy's emaciated pictures and her extreme weight. Weight is not reflective of the amount of pain we are all in. One does not have to be extremely emacaited in order to be suffering imensly. I felt so bad for Kathy because of how her weight and pictures were right there in front of her the whole show.  I'm sure it was a BIG trigger! Kathy, I am so proud of you for having the strength and courage to go on the show and give yourself a voice. You are an inspiration, and girl, you are stronger than you think you are.  

I am also upset because it seemed as if Dr. Phil was saying that Kathy is now recovered. SHe has worked very hard, yes, but the hell will live on for MUCH MUCH longer and it seems to minimalize her pain and suffering. I am sorry if I sound like I am lecturing, but I just cannot stay quiet. Too much misinformation and stereotypes are out there. People with eating disorders are anything but selfish. We did not choose this way of coping. Please understand that. We did not choose this. We live with undescribable pain and hurt each and everyday. The battle in our minds is out of control, however, we percieve anorexia to be the only thing we can control. Anorexia is hell and recovery is much more hell. People do not understand how HARD it is to eat or to not purge. It is a battle each and every day. Our minds scream at us how fat, lazy, worthless, selfish, and undeserving we are. Anorexia is PAIN! If any of you have anything in response to this, I would love to talk with you. Anorexia has killed me every single day I continue to hold on, and I understand just how horrible and painful this road to health is. Thank you all for listening, 

Julie 

Every video of your daughter acting out really hit home.  I am a mother of a 7 year old little girl with PWS.  I know the frustration that you feel with the behaviors. We have dealt with them for a few years now.   We got an early diagnosis.  The first thing I did was research this disorder and join the National Asscociation.  They are a wonderful resource for parents or anyone else out there wanting information.  The behaviors are part of the syndrome and never really go away from what I understand.  Every parent of a child with PWS has bad days, even parents of regular children do.  Please for the sake of your children, especially your daughter with PWS, join the association.  PWS children are very special.  They are a blessing to us, they teach us so much!  Your daughter deserves the right to have a mommy educated on PWS and have all the things she needs put in place.  There are many services out there for her, she needs you to get them for her.  We live one day at a time, always have one battle after another.  But I would never talk down to my daughter, she did not ask to be born with PWS.  I've grown a lot as a person and have learned so much patience. My daughter has taught me so much more than I thought she could at such a young age.  I hope you take the advice and talk to the association.  My thoughts are with you and your daughter.

I am angry...have every right to be!!! We have tried to help her...she is not interested...doesn't think there is anything wrong with her ribs sticking out...being able to feel every bump on her spine...etc.  

  

The last time I checked suicide was a sin! She does not act in a christian manner...is nasty to everyone and frankly I can't believe that God would be ok with the way she treats herself or her family. I don't want to know a God that would approve of her behavior. 

  

There is nothing left but anger. My family has tried to help her but instead of being grateful for the care and concern she just gets more mean and nasty. As you should know, you can't help someone who doesn't want it...won't admit there is a problem. She is going blind and has known about the possibility of this happening for years and has refused to get any treatment...if she had done the things her eye doctor recomended she wouldn't have the severity of problem she has today. She has also tested positive for cancerous cells...she would rather be in denial about that too...She will die sooner rather then later because of her own actions. To me that is suicide...to do nothing to save yourself and to do everything in your power to aid in your ultimate demise is a sin...to me it is murder...only she is killing herself. 

  

I don't harbor ill wishes towards her...I don't wish her dead...I would love to see her get help and start treating people the way they deserve to be treated...But it is not going to happen not ever. As far as dealing with mental health issues...I do already deal with my own. I had problems and got help and continue to fight my own inner demons...it would have been easy for me to slide into the kind of depression that you don't come out of but I got help. It is possible to get treatment for all mental health issues. If you found the strength to admit your problem with food and get help then you know that you have to acknowledge the problem and do the work necessary to get better.   

  

So, I am angry and will probably still be angry at her funeral.  

I have read all the posts for Prader Willi Syndrome and I would like to put this out there.  My daugher is 16 years old and wasn't diagnoised with PWS until she was 13 years old.  Until she was diagnoised I had never heard of this disorder.  She spent her life being misdiagnoised.  But one thing is for sure.  She was a food sneaker.  At night she would get up and sneak food.  We would punish her but it never did any good.  She would continue to do it.  One night I thought I had everthing put away and she snuck frozen orange juice.  I told my husband the next day that there was something really wrong and that she was not just trying to be sneaky but was trying to satisfy something.  At that realization, I felt bad for having punished her because I really realized something was wrong.  What led to her proper diagnoises is that her behavior had gotton to the point where I didn't think I could keep her because she was becoming a danger to herself as well as her family.  So out of desperation I sought out a neurologist in Dallas whom I found on the internet who was the head at Children's in Dallas.  He ran the necessary tests and called me personally to tell me that it was positive for PWS.  My daughter had been seen, tested, proded and poked her whole life by this doctor and that.  This specialist and that one and NOONE EVER suspected it could be PWS until I found this Dr. at Children's.  The behavior in these children can be very bad to say the least but I have found a way to deal with it with my daughter.  I love her with all my heart and she is the sweetest person and everyone who meets her loves her.  But you don't want to be around when she is having a meltdown.  I have found the proper meds and the right dosages and her weight is somewhat controlled and her behavior problems are minimal.  She hasn't had a temper tantrum in about a year.  I attribute it to her meds.  She is doing well in school and at home.  She weighs just alittle over 200lbs.  We are working to get that down.  I have her on the treadmill every day but the other thing that noone has brought out is that their motabilism is slower than normal so they will not loose weight as easily as others.  Anyway, thats all I wanted to say, thanks for listening.  Oh, by the way, if anyone knows of any specialist in Texas or near Texas please let me know. 

Kim