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Topic : 08/25 Extreme Food Obsessions

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Created on : Friday, October 28, 2005, 02:17:57 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1

(Original Air Date: 11/03/05) What if you were so obsessed with eating that it almost killed you, or craving food so badly that you yelled, kicked and screamed when you couldn't get enough. Nichelle's 6-year-old daughter has Prader-Willi Syndrome and constantly wants to eat. She once threw a fit so loud, the neighbors called the police. Can Nichelle learn to control her own temper when her daughter has a tantrum? Then, Dr. Phil follows up with Kathy, an anorexic whose condition was so severe, she weighed only 68 pounds. She spent three months in treatment, but her struggle is not over yet. Can her family learn the difference between supporting her and enabling her? Talk about the show here.

 

Find out what happened on the show.

 

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drsindel

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November 3, 2005, 7:54 am PST

Single Mom too

Dear Nichelle, 

I posted a message but just learned that on top of everything else, you are also a single mom.  I just have to empathize with you, as I too am a single mother.  I have many frustrations, but none require the kind of strength you must find to care for your children.  I understand what it is like to be "the only one" your child (ren) depend on.  I was 35 when I became a mom for the first time--alone.  The biological father was just not interested in being a dad.  He has never even called to see if it was a boy or a girl.  My family is very dysfunctional and I chose to keep our distance.  So we are very much without any support other than a few (3) friends that help when they can.  It is very lonely, but it is also very peaceful.  Try to appreciate the time you have to make all the decisions for the benefit of your children.  Remember that your number one job as a mom is to Protect your children--even if it is at times from your own frustrations.  There have been times I have gone into the bathroom after my daughter is in bed for the evening, and just sat and cried.  It has helped me to know that I am a very strong person, and I am her mom and her dad, and God wanted me to have her and learn these important lessons.  I will never allow my own fears to impact my daughters well being.  It is hard, and she doesn't even have any health problems so far.  So I can't fully understand what you are going through.  I did think it was important to let you know though that you are not alone.   

Sincerely, 

Danielle 
 
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joyceopp
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November 3, 2005, 7:54 am PST

Your kids are BEAUTIFUL!

Quote From: nichelle81

Thank you so much to all the people who posted messages here for me. Nice or mean I have taken the time to read everybodys opinion and take all said into consideration. I apologize that I said the kids were brats. They just act that way sometimes, I DO Love them and Ill do my best to handle the situation. I should not have been so negative in my postings...I guess I was just blown away by all the meanies who hadnt even seen the show yet. Thanks so much to the nice, positive, people who left such great messages. It IS appreciated. "you get more flies with sugar then with vinigar" (not that anyone wants flies! but you get my point! :)Thanks again to everyone. 

 

Sincerely, Nichelle 

Hi Nichelle: 

  

I think I did come off a little mean and I truly apologize for that!  I am just frustrated that Dr. Phil chose not to show all of the interventions that our kids have today to make their lives better, like Growth Hormone injections, Therapies, etc.   

  

All of these things evolved because parents of older children FOUGHT like HELL for them and I don't understand why Dr. Phil doesn't want to do a show on the FIGHT to BEAT THE HUNGER!   

  

I am glad that you have reached out for help and that PWSA USA is going to help you.  Honestly, I am sorry that I came down so hard on you, I do wish you the very BEST! 

  

Sincerely, 

  

Joyce 

  

  
 
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zander22
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November 3, 2005, 8:02 am PST

11/03 Extreme Food Obsessions

Quote From: nichelle81

OK, first of ALL... until recently I did not know what my daughter had. Second of all, your son is ONLY 21 months....you have NO clue what the future holds for you with a child who has that disorder. Savannah has terrible fits of rage, violent outbursts, and screams bloody murder when she doesnt get her way. DEAL WITH THAT!!! you havent seen anything yet. Im a 24 year old SINGLE mom with 2 spoiled little brats. I try to do the best I can. I DO spoil them sometimes because I love them, but its taking its toll! NO ONE who knows me will EVEN watch my one year old. (she was born a mamma's girl and a screamer!) IM ALL ALONE. I went to Dr. Phil for help because OBVIOULSY I felt I needed it!!! Can I get SOME credit?! People dont air their dirty laundry JUST BECAUSE! Do you think I want the whole world to think Im a jerk?! NO, but I DO Know I need help with dealing with my daughter. I cant handle it by myself. Dont come down on someone that had the nerve to even come forward! its a good thing! I HAD THE "BALLS" TO SAY ON NATIONAL TV WHAT EVERY OTHER FRUSTRATED PARENT IS THINKING, AND I WASNT SCARED!!!! be a jerk if you want, but i think I just opened up a whole can of worms...youll see. TUNE IN!!!!  

   

    I'm disgusted that you called your daughter a brat. I was only 18 when my son was born. He also have this disease that your daughter have. I am a single mom, too. No, it is not easy. I almost gave up.....but it is my responsiblilty because I bought my son into world. So I've learned in hard way. I've learned alot of patiences and control of my son. At least, I don't spank him with belt or smack across his face. I don't call him names. Do I think he is fault? Your daughter's? No. Your daughter did not ask you to bring her into the world, you did. I am not here to pick on you but you have absoultly no excuse to be abusive to your daughter.
 
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gigiclarke
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November 3, 2005, 8:28 am PST

prader-willi syndrome

dr.phil, thank you ,thank you, thank you, my sister is 37years old and we (my parents and I) were never able to put a name on her disorder until now. she exibited so many different symptoms of so many different things that the drs. here just gave up trying to diagnos her. however we all knew that we just had to love her through her eyes. it was not always easy but we had a lot of supportive and understanding extended family, friends and neighbors. again thank you, thank you, thank you!!!!!!!! 

keep up the good work, sincerely, angela clarke 
 
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lorilynn
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November 3, 2005, 9:10 am PST

Dear Nichelle

Hi i'm only 17, and i understand where Nichelle is coming from, i'm a babysitter of a child who is autistic, and another child who has anger management and a few kids who are A.D.D or A.D.H.D, and it's hard to even watch them for a couple of hours let alone 24/7. Eventually i want to have kids myself, but first i am going to make sure i can take care of them, and make sure i raise them to be polite, and good children, i understand that it's not your fault Nichelle, that your children act the way they do, some kids get it from their friends, or other adults, but I do have an idea, that i have done with the children in the past which i got from Nanny 911, and that is to make a chart, and every time your child(ren) listen to you and do what you ask, then you give them a sticker and make a goal that your child will understand he or she will have to reach, example at the end of the week maybe you want your child to have 10 stickers, and if your child has 10 or more stickers, you can give them a chocolate bar, or candy even a little toy possibly from the dollar store, children at a younger age like yours will probably be happy with anything, and you should tell your child you are very happy with their habits, and listening during the week! Kids will feel happy if you tell them you are very happy with them!  
 
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susieg
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November 3, 2005, 9:49 am PST

11/03 Extreme Food Obsessions

Quote From: jucrespi

My daughter also has PWS.  She will be 12 in a couple weeks.  While we do have our  "moments",   for the most part, she is a wonderful kid - smart, funny, compassionate, helpful and extremely determined to be like other kids.  It's wonderful to see her face light up when she has finally accomplished a task that maybe other children just take for granted.  But then I have seen her succeed at other things that other kids haven't mastered yet.  Patience and unconditional love is what makes this all work.  Having everything locked up and structure helps too!  God bless and know that you are not alone in having a child with PWS.  

  

  

I have a daughter that also has Prader-Willie and Turners Syndrome, she was diagnose at 3 months of age. She is my miracle baby.   Avery has been in therapy once a week since.  Which is doing wonders for her.  She is about half a year to 9 months behind in her Motor skills, but she is 3 months behind in her Cognitive skills.  We have been to the Prader-Willie Institute in Pittsburgh, but because she is still under weight they can't do anything for her just yet. Our problem with Avery is,  that nobody has ever heard of a child with PWS and Turners together.  So we just have to wait and take one day at time. All I have to say to Nichelle is I understand, I too cried when I saw the next clip about that other family.  Thinking, is that what I have to look forward to.  I also have a baby who is 6 months and dealing with Avery  somedays takes alot out of me, But just take things one day at a time.  Try to contact some help with an organiztions that deal with Special needs children.   They may have some programs for Savannah.  God Bless 
 
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mwbambi
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November 3, 2005, 9:57 am PST

Dear Nichelle

I do not know what you are going through but my two daughters work with clients that have PWS.  It is a residential treatment facility in Wisconsin.  They deal with adults of PWS but along with that, they have other disorders.  I have learned alot about PWS from them and online.  It is a disease that needs alot more information and research.   

  

I think you have alot of courage by going on the show.  My thoughts and prayers are with you and your beautiful daughter. 

  

 

  

  

Michelle 
 
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utahgirl79
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November 3, 2005, 10:18 am PST

11/03 Extreme Food Obsessions

Quote From: lorilynn

Hi i'm only 17, and i understand where Nichelle is coming from, i'm a babysitter of a child who is autistic, and another child who has anger management and a few kids who are A.D.D or A.D.H.D, and it's hard to even watch them for a couple of hours let alone 24/7. Eventually i want to have kids myself, but first i am going to make sure i can take care of them, and make sure i raise them to be polite, and good children, i understand that it's not your fault Nichelle, that your children act the way they do, some kids get it from their friends, or other adults, but I do have an idea, that i have done with the children in the past which i got from Nanny 911, and that is to make a chart, and every time your child(ren) listen to you and do what you ask, then you give them a sticker and make a goal that your child will understand he or she will have to reach, example at the end of the week maybe you want your child to have 10 stickers, and if your child has 10 or more stickers, you can give them a chocolate bar, or candy even a little toy possibly from the dollar store, children at a younger age like yours will probably be happy with anything, and you should tell your child you are very happy with their habits, and listening during the week! Kids will feel happy if you tell them you are very happy with them!  

    Not to start off on a negative note but I have to disagree that it's not Nichelle's fault as to how her children treat her.  Yes, some children do have disablilities that cause them to behave in a fashion that is hard to manage.  And if that be the case I feel that the parents should seriously look into other alternatives (such as counseling, advice from medical experts that work in that particular area of the child's disability..etc..etc)  that can support and teach the parents how to cope with the behaviors that their children are engaging in and learn to be firm in their dicipline. Being a parent automatically give us a responsibility to teach our children how to behave regardless of how their friends or other surrounding adults choose to act.  They need to learn how to take upon themselves the responsibility of their actions instead of it being okay to blame others for their misconduct. Like Dr.Phil has stated many times, "We teach people how to treat us."  And I feel that applies to our relationships with our children.  It is a good idea to make things fun for children but I feel that there are just sometimes our children need to know and understand that they have no choice but to listen and to behave in a well-mannered fashion (even when there is no candy bar or dollar store reward).  If we get in the habit of materialisticly rewarding our children for every single good choice they make they will then become dependent on it and think that that is what should happen for the rest of their lives (so-to-speak).  I do award my child, sometimes, with a toy or snack when he has behaved or done good in school.  Aside from the occasional toy or snacks I use words of praise to reinforce his good behavior.   Children or like walking sponges who take everything in we as parents, grandparents, teachers, friends, family do.  If we don't model to our children certain acceptable behaviors than how are we ever to expect them to behave and to be respectful. 
 
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jldkmd86
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November 3, 2005, 10:29 am PST

Hey

Quote From: nichelle81

OK, first of ALL... until recently I did not know what my daughter had. Second of all, your son is ONLY 21 months....you have NO clue what the future holds for you with a child who has that disorder. Savannah has terrible fits of rage, violent outbursts, and screams bloody murder when she doesnt get her way. DEAL WITH THAT!!! you havent seen anything yet. Im a 24 year old SINGLE mom with 2 spoiled little brats. I try to do the best I can. I DO spoil them sometimes because I love them, but its taking its toll! NO ONE who knows me will EVEN watch my one year old. (she was born a mamma's girl and a screamer!) IM ALL ALONE. I went to Dr. Phil for help because OBVIOULSY I felt I needed it!!! Can I get SOME credit?! People dont air their dirty laundry JUST BECAUSE! Do you think I want the whole world to think Im a jerk?! NO, but I DO Know I need help with dealing with my daughter. I cant handle it by myself. Dont come down on someone that had the nerve to even come forward! its a good thing! I HAD THE "BALLS" TO SAY ON NATIONAL TV WHAT EVERY OTHER FRUSTRATED PARENT IS THINKING, AND I WASNT SCARED!!!! be a jerk if you want, but i think I just opened up a whole can of worms...youll see. TUNE IN!!!! 

  

I just wanted to say that I was on Dr. Phil's "stalking the stars" show and got a ton of negative feedback on here myself.  Don't pay any attention to it.  You did what you had to get the help that you KNEW you needed and that's all that matters.  The people on this message board that only have negative things to say need to get a life and realize that they can't possibly know anything about the whole situation because they are only seeing a 60 minute show.  So good luck with everything and I hope that Dr. Phil's advice will help you! 

  

Jenni 
 
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golden1
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November 3, 2005, 10:47 am PST

Possible Abuse

Quote From: drgnj66

  

Joyce, thanks for your reply.  She was diagnosed PWS back when she was two.  Her mother wouldn't allow any treatment.  As I said now she is diabetic, with uncontrollable sugar.  Only when she's with her Dad does it seem to be controlled.  We watch what we allow her to eat, and she does satisfactory with that.  We've never locked food up, and she's never attempted to steal it...I think her Mom does though.  Her Mom has the control, and will not allow treatments other then the insulin.  She also seems to make the child sicker then she really is by taking her to the doctor, ER or Medcenter almost weekly.  The girl cannot even toilet herself properly, she needs help.  She is in a special education program which seems to be helping with social skills, but Mom is trying to get her out of it.  Seems the Mom has control and wants the child to forever be dependent, or almost as if she can't wait for her to die.  As I said, I have a hard time even knowing about the situation.....it has got to be hard.  My heart goes out to you as a caring mother of such a child.   

     If the young lady was diagnosed with PWS at age two, and her mother refused treatment, I believe that a doctor who deals with similar patients could make a legal case for removing the girl from her mother's custody. After all, this is clearly her mother's choice to deny her daughter the treatment and structure needed to manage her PWS. The girl's father needs to get a good attorney; his daughter's life is at stake.
 
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