Topic : 03/13 Infidelity Aftermath

look who is soooo creative with her replies..i remember reading this same reply to someone else..you don't know me...unlike you I can respect myself.  You are the one who wants sympathy for being a HOMEWRECKER. 

 

GET A LIFE AND LEAVE THE POOR WIFES LIVES ALONE..CAN'T HAVE ONE OF YOUR OWN SO YOU HAVE TO TRY TO TAKE THIERS...POOR POOR POOR RIVER RAT 

Tisk, Tisk....Someone should get a life and got off the message boards!!   I think your being too nice, it may get you into trouble!!

Not all men cheat for the same reason or do they all give you the same ole crap and it just happens to always be the wife's fault as to why they have wondered away and landed into your arms. Have you ever thought that just maybe they find you naive. You're stupid enough to listen to their blame the wife games so for their reward they get you in any way shape and form because you give them the "pity" they need....  

 Should you really feel  so lucky that you get these cheaters? Women like you blame the woman. Men that cheat don't need a reason to cheat so don't give yourself such a great pat on the shoulder and think you're their hero  

What possible good could come from confronting this woman?  

Why have you remained in this marriage? The children is not a good enough response, anymore.  

What are you questioning? If you are still questioning you made the wrong decision. Rectify it now while you are still young and pretty. What does Phil say, "You are burning daylight" and Oprah, "Don't waste the pretty".  

If you have chosen to forgive your husband, forgive him and let it go, otherwise you are living a delusional life filled with pain and heartache and it is just going to get worse from here.  

Leave the woman alone, you can not make her feel sorry for what she has done to you, because she did nothing to you. She did what she did with your husband. He ruined your "life" and you have allowed it to continue.  

I suggest you get right with yourself and your finances. You need to decide to forgive your husband for real or get the hell out while you are still young enough to live happily and fully.

I like the whole idea, and of course leave the kids, this way he will what it is like with just you gone and he has to take care of everything.... that is a good way to show him how life could be....

 

I would like to see Dr Phil do a show as two why People in a supposedly loving relationship Cheat either physically or emotionaly. We are always ready to bust either the male or the female who does the cheating, but why did that person go outside that marriage in the first place. Did communication break down?,  Did Physical attraction go away, did respect from the other spouse go away or never exist. I do not think most people actually look to cheat. It happens because someone at home is not taking care of the other one. If you have a good relationship, physcially and emotionally I dont think most people would cheat. Lets find out why and stop bashing everyone who cheats. Some are in relationships which need medical attention.

What town are you from?

I have been married for 35 years.  In the first 7 years of my marriage my hsuband cheated on me twice.  Recently he admitted to having an affair lasting 6 months  which ended13 years ago.  He says he broke it off after 6 months realising it was a mistake and that the woman concerned did not have the value system he admired in me.   He only told me however when a situation arose where he felt he had no choice but admit it.  Otherwise I would never have known.  This was 4 months ago and I am still gutted.  He swears nothing else has happened in the last 13 years and nothing ever will, that he didnt realise the enormity of his actions when he was first married and this last effort has  brought it  home to him about just how wrong this was.  He swears it will never happen again, loves me to death, and is doing everything he as the cheater is supposed to according to the literature.  He has changed...he talks more..is more open and I believe sincerely regrets his actions. He has apologized repeatedly, something he was never able to do erlier in the marriage when this happened, and says he wants to do whatever it takes to make this right, including working through the restoring a marriage after an affair type books.  I however, have deep hurt and betrayal and trust issues never the less. I feel that not only did he betray me for six months, he has in effect lied to me for the last 13 years. It has taken away my good memories of my life and made me wonder why I put so much into this marriage.  What do I do?  I know that past behaviour is a really good indicator of future behaviourso is there really a chance of putting this right or am I dreaming?   The other choice is to leave a comfortable life, and be alone.  I have few friends and no family.