I am amazed that "other women" even want to speak out on here. Not that the cheating man isn't too blame as well. the other women make it possible for them to be the selfish jerks they are. does the wife have ownership in marriage problems? sure. so does the husband. for a woman to believe one person's story as it is fact, and not one person's perception ("she doesn't make me feel special", etc) is naive and foolish. the "other woman" is worse than the wife who she judges.
someone on here said that a husband should consider how he would feel if his mother were treated this way....good point. another fact these men forget so easily are their children. would they want their daughter to meet and marry a man like them, causing them heartache and broken dreams and family? Would they want their daughters to cheat on their spouses, never finding out what it's like to have a fullfilling, intimate relationship? what about their sons? would they want their sons to be cheated on or cheat? When people cheat on their spouse, they are cheating and cheating on their children.
i think these husbands (and wives who cheat as well) don't understand what love really is anyway. they think they love others and their children, but those of us who know the deep meaning of what it is like to truly love another human being (and treat them that way) know that these people only think they love. they have a multitude of reasons they are not capable of love. They also don't know what it is like to love themselves.
i myself have had quite a few opportunities to be the "other woman" by men who approached me. (it would have been more if i was one of those other women who "hunt" other people's men....we all know the type...unless you are one...then you don't get it). i even had a man who lied to me and i found out after kissing him (yuck!) that he was married. i obviously liked the guy enough to kiss him....or was attracted enough...but it changed after i found out he was married. i thought, what kind of guy is this? i told him i wouldn't be involved with a married man. it would be harder if you are in a more involved relationship before knowing the truth. yet it still boils down to a decision, and determination not to justify something that is morally wrong. people who rob banks, murder, and rape all have their own justifications. the decision is...am i going to be the "other woman", or a woman who is worth something....the woman who will find myself someone honest and unattached. am i a woman who is worth being the wife and mother of an unattached man's children? Am i willing to look for someone who is unattached, or am i so insecure, i have to cling to this man, even though he is married or committed to someone else? Do i think i can find someone else, or am i worried this is the only man left on this planet who would "love" me or have chemistry with me?
i am shocked at the low levels of self worth the cheater and the willing participant have in common. as long as we have people like this in our world (it takes both kinds) then we will have spouses who won't work hard on their marriages and who won't own up to their own problems. instead we have jerks who blame their spouse, and someone who is so desparate and clingy, willing to believe anything they are told. is that a match made in heaven, or what? i'd say....or what!
They gave everything to their husbands: years of support, a good home and children. Then out of the blue, their husbands tell them they love someone else and walked out forever. Now, four angry, jilted first wives join Dr. Phil and Robin for an intensive two-day retreat to pick up the pieces, reclaim their independence and move forward with their lives. Will a wake-up call from Dr. Phil and Robin empower them to start over? Share your thoughts, join the discussion.
