Topic : 06/05 Conception Deception

 Apparently your guests have not heard of abstinance.
 Even if the girl did lie, he took a risk by having sex
 prior to choosing his own soul mate. Take some
 responsibility for your part in the matter.
 
 V

When I was in high school there were to lesbians they both went with guys. 

When the one got pregnant then they both dumped the guys they were with. 

  

The girls stayed together for 5 years before going there seperate ways. 

The girl with the kid then went after the kids father for support. 

The judge ordered the father who was 15 when the kid was conceived. 

To pay support from the date the kid was conceieved. 

Since the father was under age for the 1st 3 years the fathers parents had to repay all of those support payments. 

  

This is the ultimate deception. 

I have to say I have thought about getting pregnant to keep my man. When I am upset and dont know what else to do it has creeped into my mind. It is not so much to keep him but to get him to pay attention to me like he used to. When I think about it I know it would be totally stupid and I would never do it but sometimes I feel so sad and want things to be like they used to be so bad I think it would help. Then I snap back into reality. Just because I have his baby doesnt mean he would stay with me. I know he would support his child and be a dad but that doesnt mean he would stay with me. I am 29 years old and these thoughts seem so immature to me.

Derek needs to accept some of the responsibility.  By dwelling on the point that his wife lied to him, it makes him look as though he is looking for an excuse to leave.  If he truly loved this woman, then he would understand why she did what she did and thank God for a wonderful child.  He just doesn't want to be in this marriage and this is a perfect excuse to make her look like the problem.

The best story I have is a friend got remarried for the 3rd time. 

His new wife wanted kids and he did not. 

She thought she was being smart by not taking her birth control pills. 

However her husband had the last laugh. 

Why you ask because in between his 1st and 2nd marriage he had a vesectemy. 

  

His new wife was so deperate to have a kid that she cheated on him. 

  

Well the paternity test proved who was wrong in that one. 

  

Alot of women are sneaky, conieving people. 

Hi V. 

Just wanted to say I agree with you.  I am 33 years old and am abstaining from sex.  If that guy didn't want a baby then why was he having sex to begin with? Even if she was on birth control that is not 100% full proof.  He can't sit here now,,3 years later,,,still feeling like he is a victim b/c the woman he was having sex with got pregnant.  People get pregnant on birth control...so he had the risk of getting her pregnant anyway.  Dr. Phil COMPLETELY missed the point that the guy could have been avoiding sex to begin with,,,especially with a girl he was already having second thoughts about, 

   Fascinating show.  Mary needs to get her tubes tied already!  She knew how babies were made before she ever fooled around with her husband.  Using only a condom wouldn't have been enough in the first place, especially when ovulating!  And now she knows how her husband is, & she has 4 children, get those tubes tied right now!  If she can't afford it, go to Planned Parenthood & get information, make a deal to pay on time, do something!  And don't trust him to be in charge of birth control.   

   "Fool me once, shame on you.  Fool me twice, shame on me." 

   Both parties need to take responsibility & both need to use birth control.  That first husband should have at least used a condom!  Asking if his girlfriend is using protection IS NOT BIRTH CONTROL!   

   I worked for Human Services for 25 years, read many, many Paternity Questionnaires.  Only 1 girl was using birth control in all those years.  Come on, folks!  Research the effectiveness of diffferent birth control methods & TAKE RESPONSIBILITY for doing it right!  The children should not suffer for their parents' lack of planning.  I'm so glad Dr. Phil emphasized that both parents still have to financially & emotionally support those beautiful children no matter what! 

I take his side too.  You are putting words in his mouth by saying that by asking her if she's on the pill means he's saying he doesn't love her and won't stick by her.  It simply means he's not ready to be a father.  If she said yes she was on the pill, that told him she was using backup and he didn't have to. 

  

My husband's previous wife said she was on the pill and they ended up having two children.  Years after they were divorced and we were married she came clean and said he tricked him and quit taking the pill both times to get pregnant because she knew they were falling apart and she thought it would make him stay.  And now he doesn't get to have a relationship with them at all.  

  

I know he loves me but I feel like I'm paying for what she did to him.  I don't have any children but I want a family greatly.  I was on the pill when we first got together but because of migraines I quit taking it.  He knows that, but doesn't want to use protection on his part.  But he's not ready to have a baby with me.  He says down the road sometime, but he doesn't want the responsibility right now.  He says that if it happens, it happens, but he doesn't want to try like I do.  I've been off the pill since 2002, no protection at all, and I haven't gotten pregnant.  When I want to seek medical help, he's not ready.  He didn't get to choose when he wanted to start a family with his first wife, so he wants to be able to choose this time.  I believe deep down he'll never be ready.  Because of her.  Yes, he participated in it, but the wife he loved reassured him that she was on the pill.  She tricked him! 

Hey, 

I am sure you love your husband, but you blaming his ex for not wanting to have children is a big mistake.  Get over your resentment towards HIS EX...He obviously does not want to have children b/c he keeps telling you the same thing he told his first wife.  Why do you ladies marry these controlling men???   

  

In my HUMBLE opnion,,,real men want to have children. 

If you saw the visual on the screen, he didn't do it missionary style (there are other positions!) but from the back.   

Also it is not how deep it goes, he only needs to ejaculate on the opening for the 'little guys' to swim in.   

Tubals are abdominal surgery costing thousands of dollars and not covered by insurance, you are really saying 'let them eat cake."   

If it could be done at outpatient for under $1000 it would be a viable option to the pill.