Message Boards

Topic : 12/02 Dr. Phil and Robin's First Wives Club, Part 3

Number of Replies: 172
New Messages This Week: 0
Last Reply On:
Created on : Tuesday, November 22, 2005, 03:37:28 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1

The First Wives are back and better than ever! After all their hard work during the “First Wives Club,” Dr. Phil and Robin wanted Pam, Holly, Heidi and Donna to have life-changing makeovers.  The experts start with their look, but after this show's amazing gifts and surprises, these women's lives will never be the same! Talk about the show here.

 

Find out what happened on the show.

 

More December 2005 Show Boards.


As of January, 2009, this message board will become "Read Only" and will be closed to further posting. Please join the NEW Dr. Phil Community to continue your discussions, personalize your message board experience, start a blog and meet new friends.

December 2, 2005, 8:28 am CST

12/02 Dr. Phil and Robin's First Wives Club, Part 3

AW that is really sweet!  I couldn't watch this show with dry eyes.... had to keep getting more Kleenex.    To be perfectly Honest the first 2 shows made me really depressed to watch them...  I am really happy for all of you and your new start... 
 
December 2, 2005, 8:35 am CST

we ID with relationships

Quote From: whatdoikno

In my words;  these ladies are now getting to know and be true to their own positive self.  Before their divorces they are not the same person they are today.  In fact they used the trajedy of their marriages and divorces as an opportunity to become better people.    I hope I can learn from them, how I can avoid a failed marriage and divorce and become a better person. 

  

  

 The reality is that we all identify with our relationships. It's a sad state of affairs but we often give so much of us to our relationship to the point that if it should end, we have nothing left in our well. On a day-to-day basis, we often find ourselves going to the well inside and giving to others. But when it comes time to dip into the well for us, there's nothing left.  That's why it's important that in any relationship, there is a give and take.

I understand that love is about giving, and as a male who so much believes in daily romance, I've done it quite often. But we must require that the partner in our life also gives to us in return. Perhaps that's one reason why these members of the first wives club hurt so much and so deeply.
Adultry hurts no matter how you slice it. And to be left for someone younger (I just don't understand why a middle-aged man would chase after someone younger.) intensifies that pain. After all, we get married with the expectation that this IS it; we start out as a couple, raising a family, planning, dreaming of a life together, and then to have it suddenly be thrown out for someone younger.

What happend to history? What happened to the forever 'I love you'? All those days and months of getting to know each other, finding out about each other's quirks, traits, small things and then have them tossed. It doesn't make sense. Besides, it's such a comfort having someone there who knows you so well that there's no walking on eggshells for fear of upsetting their day. I honestly believe that being together through thick and thin should be the cement that binds us.

But that's not what happened here, and that's the tragedy in all this. These men didn't realize what wonderful wives they had, and now they've lost it all. For these women, that's the better part of it. They will carry on and find a better life than what they had before. After all, it sounds like they also settled for less when they could have had more. Each one of them is so beautiful, intelligent and vibrant. What hapened was that in their relationships, they settled for just being wives instead of vibrant people. And they probably settled for going to their own well for strength and support and finally found there was no more to give.

When my daughter left home at 18, she asked me if I had some advice. I told her: Never give up on your dreams, they're yours to keep forever. Never settle for anything less than what you want and believe in. Never let a man take away your dreams or put them on a backburner for his own dreams or pursuits. If you do, you will never realize your dreams. And finally, I told her that if a man could ever clinch his fist in anger at you, leave. Because the distance between the clinched fist in  anger and you is just a swing away. And that's not far at all.

Live well....


 
December 2, 2005, 8:36 am CST

Another survivor

I too have survived a cheating husband of 12 years and I cried happy tears for the ladies today.  My ex-husband never admitted the affair to me, but I have eye witnesses to it.  I couldn't believe he wouldn't admit it, but that it par for the course.  I love Dr. Phil and Robin.  I have 2 children that I worry about, but even though I don't like it, I co-parent with the butthead.  I don't even know him anymore, but I deal, because of the kids.  I just hope and pray that they are ok (they seem to be).  I am frustrated because I don't think I am setting a good example for them by being unemployed and stress over that fact.  I have steadily applied for jobs, but no luck so far.  I have experience and some college, but not enough.  Any responses I have gotten for some position have been goofy hours that a single mom can't work (3a-7a).  I keep pluggin' away.  I have many interests, and you would think that at 38 I would know what I want to be "when I grow up."  I think that my many interests is why I haven't continued my education.  I have taken a few classes at a community college and received a diploma from Professional Career Development Institute for bookkeeping and accounting, but the diploma isn't a degree.  I know something is out there for me and one day it will come, so all you survivors out there-keep pluggin' and it can happen.
 
December 2, 2005, 8:57 am CST

Need help please.....

My mother is going through this exact thing. My father walked out on her after 26 years and she defined herself by being with him. Now that he has walked out and left her for another woman ( a younger woman) it was a shocker to us all. My mother died the day my father left her. My father went right from my mom's bed into the "new" woman's bed THAT NIGHT. No break in between. 

My mom snapped and changed that day and she will never be the same. She is dying out of pure heartache and sorrow. She is 58 and is now hospitalized for a long time because she cannot live without him. She is supposed to be released from the hospital on Dec. 26th. She is very depressed and suicidal and has no time, will or energy to move on anymore. 

We kids and grandkids feel like she is already gone. I would really love to purchase the "First Wives Club" tapes and send them to my mother in the hospital, but they are very expensive. Can someone tell me please why do they cost so much? I am a stay at home mom with 2 very young children, my husband is getting ready to go to the Gulft (Iraq area) in 6 days and I need my mother to get out of the hospital and get better, cause my kids miss her very much. 

Please help. 

Maria Harrod 

 
December 2, 2005, 9:32 am CST

I agree they should make shows availble through Netflix

Quote From: miamoss

My mother is going through this exact thing. My father walked out on her after 26 years and she defined herself by being with him. Now that he has walked out and left her for another woman ( a younger woman) it was a shocker to us all. My mother died the day my father left her. My father went right from my mom's bed into the "new" woman's bed THAT NIGHT. No break in between. 

My mom snapped and changed that day and she will never be the same. She is dying out of pure heartache and sorrow. She is 58 and is now hospitalized for a long time because she cannot live without him. She is supposed to be released from the hospital on Dec. 26th. She is very depressed and suicidal and has no time, will or energy to move on anymore. 

We kids and grandkids feel like she is already gone. I would really love to purchase the "First Wives Club" tapes and send them to my mother in the hospital, but they are very expensive. Can someone tell me please why do they cost so much? I am a stay at home mom with 2 very young children, my husband is getting ready to go to the Gulft (Iraq area) in 6 days and I need my mother to get out of the hospital and get better, cause my kids miss her very much. 

Please help. 

Maria Harrod 

I don't understand why DVD's of these shows are not availble for rent like so many others are. 

 
December 2, 2005, 9:41 am CST

Who's Laughing Now?

     I haven't seen the show yet, but I get the feeling that it's going to be like an emotional "Antiques Roadshow." My guess is that at least one of the ex-husbands is going to watching. When he sees what he could have had for always, he'll want to die, especially if his present relationship/marriage isn't going well. It's true, it's true: doing well is the best revenge, and these ladies are giving payback, big time!
 
December 2, 2005, 9:56 am CST

Can a marriage survive an affair?

A little over a year ago I became suspicious that my husband had an affair with a woman he worked with.  Never before had I doubted his fidelity.  Then certain things happened that made me very suspicious.  Whenever I was around them I got the feeling that I was the other woman.  I started questioning him about it (badgering would be more accurate) and finally one day he said "yeah, I f***ed her."  I asked him where, and he said "at work, after hours" When I asked him if he was telling me the truth he said he was telling me what I wanted to hear.  Later he said he had lied, that he'd never cheated on me.  But he called her and told her I was suspicious.  I started losing a lot of weight rapidly.  At my lowest point I got down to 92 lbs.  I am Bipolar and have Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and the thought of my husband, who I love more than life, being with another woman was literally killing me.  So, in an attempt to save my life, my husband quit his job, sold all our possessions and moved us out of state.  Still, I cannot stop the obsessive thoughts I have of him cheating on me.  He swears up and down that he never had an affair.  Yet, I can't seem to let it go.  I have tried to get therapy, but I have no medical insurance and cannot afford to pay for it.  My husband doesn't understand why I can't let it go.  And a part of me wants to know the truth, while another part of me is terrified of what the real truth is.  I know he loves me, but I need to know if I am married to a man who would cheat and lie to me.  I don't know how I'd handle it though.  I don't know what I'd do if I found out my life with this man has been one big lie.
 
December 2, 2005, 11:45 am CST

Letting Go

I have been out of a 2 1/2 years relationship now for about 1 1/2 months.  The guy ended it with me on the Wednesday and took his new girlfriend to his cottage two days after for the weekend.  I was devistated.  Does anybody know a easy way to let go and move on.  I keep thinking about him and what he is doing with his new girlfriend, if she is better that me and prettier than me and it is just breaking my heart inside.  I really want to be able to move on.  Any suggestions ?
 
December 2, 2005, 12:12 pm CST

Very Inspirational

 This show in specific has help me out so much over the last few weeks. I am only in my early 20's but had been dating this man for the past 5 years and felt like I was married. When he left me I literally felt used, lied to and extremely depressed, to the point it may have been suicidal. I literally had felt like I had been divorced as if everything I knew was gone. For days after wards i was extremely sick and missed several days of school. This show was very inspirational and reminded me that I live my life around me not him.

Mandy
 
December 2, 2005, 12:16 pm CST

There is a bright side

Quote From: sleeplesso

I have been out of a 2 1/2 years relationship now for about 1 1/2 months.  The guy ended it with me on the Wednesday and took his new girlfriend to his cottage two days after for the weekend.  I was devistated.  Does anybody know a easy way to let go and move on.  I keep thinking about him and what he is doing with his new girlfriend, if she is better that me and prettier than me and it is just breaking my heart inside.  I really want to be able to move on.  Any suggestions ?
I know exactly what you mean, my relationship ended 3 days before we were to go on vacation. He ended up going with a couple of his other girl friends that he had just met. I spent every second of the day and night thinking and dreaming about what he was doing. It hurt me so much. Hanging out with my male friends really helped me. The friends that i have of the opposite sex are very nice and caring and helped me out by telling me what they thought of my ex.
 
 
First | Prev | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | Next | Last