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Topic : 08/21 Ask Dr. Phil & Robin with JCPenney Jam

Number of Replies: 128
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Created on : Friday, December 02, 2005, 03:58:26 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1

(Original Air Date: 12/09/05) It's Ask Dr. Phil and Robin day! When they say "anything goes," the guests take full advantage. Melissa says her sex life is boring, and that it's all her husband, Spencer's, fault because he is too uptight. He says he's tired of being a piece of meat. Can they meet in the middle when it comes to the bedroom? Next, Russell says his daughter, Nyla, is a piano-playing prodigy. His wife thinks he's pushing Nyla too hard -- especially since she's only 7 months old! Then, a mother and her teenage stepdaughter compete to see who can eat less in order to lose weight, and Robin tries to set them straight. And, a mother fears for her 13-year-old daughter, Kelli, who drinks, smokes and is missing curfew. See what Dr. Phil has planned for Kelli. Plus, go backstage and get a sneak preview of Dr. Phil and Robin hosting the JCPenney Jam Concert for America's Kids, and learn how this organization is working hard to provide kids with opportunities after school. Talk about the show here.


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December 9, 2005, 8:02 am CST

tv/tivo for 4 hours of labor- Your kidding me

 
December 9, 2005, 8:16 am CST

My dress size

Quote From: alteaon

The one woman has gotten through life on her looks. Is that really something to be proud of? When these two women compete with eachother for a size zero, it makes me feel enormous at a size 8 . I have no idea how tall they are, but a size 2 or 0 is tiny for nearly everyone.  I wonder what goes through thier minds when they are out and about and see someone who is larger than they are...are they disgusted?  I have much more respect for someone who looks closer to fourty than twenty when they are 40..it just seems more natural...is it really making yourself beautiful if it's obvious that it's fake?  I know, I know...I don't live with these women, and so on, but it still bothers me that they are unhappy with themselves at a size two. It also seems like all thier competition is physical. When the 15 yr old girl brings a boyfriend home, is her step mother going to try to win his approval as well?  

  

Also, if this msg has been posted numerous times, it's because I am having problems w/ my computer 

Anyone that can wear a size zero could use me for shade at the beach!!  That's right I'm a big girl.  But I have something this lady doesn' have and that's inner peace.  I love life and I view each new day as an adventure. 

So pass the biscuits!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

  

 
December 9, 2005, 9:40 am CST

Drugless childbirth

You can't be serious!!  A woman gives birth to her FOURTH child after a 4 hour labor without an epidural and gets lifetime TIVO, a plasma TV and a day at the spa???  She didn't develop a cure for AIDS for God's sake!  Come on!  Millions of women go through childbirth without drugs everyday and live to tell about it!  Really!  I gave birth to two children after only 8 hours of labor each, no drugs, and my reward was a speedy recovery, two beautiful kids, and that was enough for me.  I felt great afterwards that I had accomplished something everyone had told me to "dread."  (i.e. the "pain" of childbirth!!)  Come on Dr. Phil;  let's encourage and empower women, not treat them like weaklings who should be pampered for doing what many of us do without even thinking about it.  Good grief!  Why do you think they call it LABOR??
 
December 9, 2005, 10:27 am CST

unbelievable

wow! I really feel sorry for the woman and her daughter.  I think it is a shame that that the mother is so obsessed with weight and looks that she has to point out and criticize her daughter if she gains even a couple of pounds. Wow, get a life and quit obsessing about your daughter's weight. You are turning her into a neurotic, self-centered, weight obsessed person. Thank god my mother was never like that, she always told me how beautiful I was (even during my awkward years) and taught me that inner beauty was way more important than how you look on the outside because beauty fades no matter how much plastic surgery you have. Besides, eventually you end up looking unnatural and creepy. I suggest you focus on  developing your inner self so that when your looks eventually fade (and they will) you have inner beauty. I have to say I think Dr. Phil was way too easy on this woman and the damage she is doing to herself and her daughter. There is nothing wrong with dieting and exercising to look your best and taking pride in your appearance but there are limits.
 
December 9, 2005, 10:29 am CST

For Candace and Mark

When we had our second child (we only have two), we involved our daughter in the whole thing.  The gap between them (51/2 years) was bigger than you have, so these ideas may not work for you.  I think the real essence of success lies in making sure that your daughter feels that the role of "big sister" is very important:  

  • I had a book with photographs of the stages of fetal development so she knew what he looked like every month. 
  • She watched my ultrasounds.
  • She talked and sang to him in my tummy.
  • I don't remember where I got them, but I had a box of sample size baby products and she used them on her best friend, bunny foo-foo, to practice being a big sister. 
  • Before he was born, we picked out rattles and puppets for her to use to distract him if he cried.
  • She was at the hospital waiting when I had my planned c-section.
  • She was involved in choosing his name.
  • She was the first person to feed him pablum.
  • She taught him letters and numbers.

We also made sure that she was front and center and not overlooked by the extended family.  They are now 7 and 13 and their relationship has always been wonderful. I rarely see any signs of jealousy or rivalry. 

 
December 9, 2005, 10:41 am CST

Janie and Brittiney

I have to feel sorry for women like this who think the only valuable thing they have to offer is their beauty.  They must be very insecure about themselves.  For Janie to be training Brittiney to have the same insecurities and fears as she has is a lack of proper parenting.  Brittiney should be learning that she is valuable no matter how she looks, building a self worth that relies on how she handles herself around others, good work ethics, knowledge, kindness, honesty, things that really matter.  Knowing that Janie has the attitude that it is all about beauty would make me feel judged by her and would never want her as a friend.  Why not make others feel comfortable instead of in competition with you?  To be so obsessed with what you eat or how much you weigh or what size your clothes are would be a total turn off to me.  How boring it must be to be around you.
 
December 9, 2005, 11:35 am CST

Dr Phil Show.

Dr. Phil. I watch your show everyday and I love it. But what do you do on the weekend?  I am trying to 

get ready for Christmas this year. See you soon. Also what  it is like to live in Los Angeles, Californi 

a?  See you soon. Sincerley Your. Ruxssell Vlaanderen.----------------------------------------------------------- 

 
December 9, 2005, 11:41 am CST

2 young

My 4 year old daughter has suddenly been saying that she has to wear make up to be pretty .  I don't understand where this is coming from, she is way to young to start thinking about image.  I keep telling her that she is already pretty and does not need it.  But she says the girls on the TV look prettier than her.  Is this going to pass or am I going to be fighting this for along time. 

  

Anybody have any advice?? 

 
December 9, 2005, 12:36 pm CST

Parents, teens, and sports

I have been stuck at home recovering from surgery, and I normally am not able to watch your show but I may start recording it for later viewing. The show that featured the dad who thinks his 7 month old is a piano prodigy struck a cord. I work as a coach and an umpire with kids playing youth baseball. I see far too many parents who think that their 7, 8, or 9 year old is the next A-Rod and will drive them to make sure they achieve what is actually the parent's goal.  

  

I would love to see a show based on this topic since there have been many news stories in the news in the last few years of parents who resorted to violence when their kids were not treated as superstars. It is usually driven by one parent who dominates the situation and maybe a show like this would serve to enlighten the less dominate parent and convince them to intervene. 

 
December 9, 2005, 12:39 pm CST

Disabled at 49

I am  5'1 & 1.2", probably around 115-120, 49 currently and disabled with Fibromyalgia and we believe Rheumatoid Arthritis. However, I had been diagosed with RA in my early 20's and both parents have it and so does my sister. My sister also has been diagnosed with FMS, RA & a brain tumor. My brother had RA when he was 2 and 3 yrs old.  He had to take 16 baby asprin a day and he crawled to get to where he needed to go. 

  

I have completly changed my methods of cooking and eating.. I read that  processed foods hurt FMS patients.  If  the product  has been grown  organicly  it's better. I am most of the time a happy go lucky person; however, being disabled has put a dampner on my life and I am trying to adjust to my new life; which is very hard to do. I've unfortuantely have had various medical problems every since I had a bad car accident in my early twenties. I do  have very depressed days and lots of stress because of this illness and the difficult financial position it has left us in so far; meaning just my in co-pays, my medications are hitting around $300 a month, then I need certain supplements and the insurance company does not cover cost of these.  When we can't buy my medication because we need to pay a bill, that of course makes me worse having to go without a prescription. 

  

My husband, is a terrific man and makes good money and I did too when I could work. But things changed. of course with the disability. Our obligations were still there but our income was lowered dramatically.   This put added stress on both of us.  Stress is not a good friend to people with FMS or to people without FMS.  Stress physically can make a person sick and you well know. 

  

He, my husband,  tolerates a lot  but he does understand I am sick. He has to pick up the slack most every day. On my good days I try to do as much as possible, so he doesn't have to worry about it. But those days are few and far between lately. But he is stressed as well but does not want to admit it; men! That stresses me out. This man has not had a vacation in the 3 years he has worked at his previous employment because he took the money instead because we have always needed it to pay bills. From the time he gets home on a Friday afternoon until he returns to work on Monday, I usually am stressed out to the max and he is too; but, I pick on him making his weekend terrible. I feel I am stressed, because when things do not go right for him in something that  he is trying to do he gets very aggitated and I can't handle aruging or ranting and raving. 

  

My family , which is in TN, puts stress on me because of all the bickering most of the time. I just don't understand it; but, we live in CT and I am trying to mend from my past problems with my family, their current problems, a rape I endured the same year I lost my dad, and was told I needed a complete hysterectomy due to uteran cancer and  the procedure was done the same year.  

  

I  have left my husband 3 times for different reasons, but I love him. I am afraid that we may let this stress because of my disability come in-between us. I was declared disabled with FMS in 99-2000. I continued to work even though I had and still have panic attacks and the horrific pain from the FMS.  By the time I got to work, I literally had to lay on the floor for an hour or so to ease my pain. 

  

In March 2003, we purchased our first home. Even though I was sick, I just tried to deal with it  and continued working but  finally my body caved in and shut down. I feel that most of the time he resents me or he's not listening to me; but, when I ask if he does, he always says he doesn't. resent me, and he does listen to me. You see his actions to me do not show it. Women just automatically do things around the house when it needs to be done or if something is needed at the store, we just pick it up; men have to be ask to do this or my does.  I just go off on him a lot when things are not done the way I want it done; and, wish I could change that for him and me. I have gotten better about not worrying about my house being as clean as I keep it but I try to deal with the way he handles chores.  

  

The pain I have is a 24/7 ordeal from the FMS and leaves me chronically fatiqued and seconding guessing myself all the and thinking too much about the past, present and future. I just worry too much. I try to handle the finances, but it's difficult for me to keep up with now because of my incognitive memory thus our credit rating is shot once again.  And also when the funds are not there, then I can't pay and thus more stress.  When a person needs to borrow money, they can't; when they don't need to borrow it, then they are bombarded with companies trying to give them loans. 

  

Our main concern is to make me better so we can have our life back. I'm sorry I didn't mean to write a book here; but, there is more to tell about my past medical problems. . I am a mess when I have  bad flare ups; which is now all the time because of our weather and the financial stress.  

  

Despite the medication I am on, which they most certainly do help with the pain and my mood swings. My point is I am exercising, eating lots of fruits and veggies, drinking lots of water and cutting out white sugar, white bread, white rice replacing them with whole grains.  I changed all to brown and lower in fats. I eat organic when the food is available in that form.  

  

I do not own a scale either, Robin.  I loved hearing you say that on today's show. I am one that I used to yo yo with my weight because of my height and consistently was put myself down. But, now I use Denise Austin Fit for Life Program and it's working great. Even with the horrific pain I get some days (a 10 on  a scale from 1-10) I make myself exercise. Most days I am a 5-7 with my medications, many therapies, exercises and diet. I also have a slightly bulging disc L-5 from the car accident and had a mild stroke in 1993.  

  

Dr. Phil, how can I get my life back before things really get worse? I mean I know most everyone does have financial problems, but we have dealt with this problem from the beginning of our marriage and now with my disability, well it's getting impossible to try and handle. Our bills are overwhelming to me and literally is making me sick.  I fear it's doing the same thing to my husband. 

  

Thanks for reading my book. 

  

Sincerely. 

  

Carlene 

 
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