Topic : 08/11 Conned by a Con Artist

A friend of mine recently spent what she thought was an ample amount of time getting to know a local guy over the net. He had a more than respectable job and a search of the net actually showed him to be a responsible member of society with a respectable past. She went to meet him in a crowded store and three people at least had knowledge of his number and employer for safety. 

If only she had waited for her lawyer to do a backround check. As soon as he had her comfortable enough he suggested a short trip to another store a short distance away in his car so they could continue their conversation. They completed that side trip and returned to her car so she felt things 

were safe enough just long enough for him to dive down her shirt and expose himself while making her kiss him while attempting to make her fondle his genitals. It all happened in the space of a minute. Luckily he stopped and didn't have a chance tostop her from exitting the car. He did have the audacity to ask if she wanted to meet for lunch at a later date however. We have come to  

find out that he has a record that includes menacing, stalking, assault,and violation of restraining orders.  Lesson here is get a lawyer and have whoever you find looked up quietly, and if getting shut of them is prudent do so with no communication whatsoever. You do not owe this person anything. My friend now has to be reassigned to a different unit where she works because she told him all about her job and may have to change the school her kids go to because she also mentioned that. Get a lawyer and use it. 

All you ladies out there:  Watch out for a guy named John Corliss Kirby.  He's mid-fifties to early sixties, tall slender, used to have a bad front tooth.  This man is a con artist, and preys on women.  He is so smooth; an experienced con.  He used to say he had a house in Lake Tahoe, and a fire-fighting-plane business.   My sister got mixed up with this clown.  He gradually isolated her from her friends, and then moved her away from all of them into a different state.  Be very aware and careful.  He may flash a lot of cash, at first, but he has no bank accounts.  He is also a thief, and has a long arrest record. 

  

Just because you knew them in the past doesn't mean they are honest people today!  

An old high school classmate and I were reunited through the internet. What followed was all the signs pointed out on the Dr. Phil show but I didn't see them.  We married and within a few months the nightmare began. It has been over 4 years and I am still recovering from the damage.  

  

  

Thank you for saying what I wanted to say to these conned women....just a brief comment:  When I found out I was wife number seven (7);  I was of course shocked, but soon realized after much research that this personality type (NPD-Narcissism Personality Disorder) was incorporated by the World Health Organization (WHO) recently (last 15 years?) because they (WHO) said so many people have it. 

  

The book is called, "Malignant Self Love" don't recall the author but it answers lots of questions about this type of Personality Disorder (NPD). 

  

I believe Dr. Phil said what I have found to be the answer to getting over a relationship like this: "Living Well is the Best Revenge".   Credit can be repaired.  (You just graduated with a Ph.D. in Credit Repair Science).   The past can be re-interpreted.  (It was because you were a wonderful person with something to give that these people target you....you gave them your confidence and now you know that trust should not be given, but earned.   This will save you from all the other con artists out there unless you believe he was the only one?).    This painful thing happened.....when life gives you lemons, make lemonade!!! 

  

Take care all and thanks for your comments...Isn't Dr. Phil the best?   Thank you Dr. Phil (and Robin) for being the Oprah-like inspiration in the field of Psychology. 

  

Right after the show on the following day, my local news reported that Ed Hicks was arrested in North Carolina! A woman watching the show recognized him as her girlfriends new boyfriend and called the police. Sandra got her wish because the guy is now behind bars on bigamy charges. I hope Dr. Phil updates the audience soon about this development. If Sandra has to testify, I hope Dr. Phil's show will be there to support her and to cover the trial. Way to go, Dr. Phil!

I took up with an old boyfriend from college after my separation (from a narcissistic type).  This guy used our old relationship as an easy way to gain my trust quickly.  We'd known each other 26 years!! 

  

He was always a sweet upstanding guy.  Well guess what? He turned out to be an internet predator, sex addict, and he tried to start affairs with 2 of MY friends while painting me as "obsessed" with him (HE contacted me!!! via a reunion site).  He was questioned by police later for being a long time client of a well-known brothel and posting some ads on websites looking for casual sex. 

  

You are so right!! You need a background check on everyone.  You really can't know people sometimes. 

maybe she should read http://cyberpaths.blogspot.com 

  

There's some stuff on that Ed Hicks too.  UGH!! 

From: http://people.aol.com/people/articles/0,19736,1140596,00.html 

  

"When he came to my home, he was just as nice as he could be, well-educated, well-mannered," Hembree said. "We sat and talked numerous times together. We thought a lot alike. And I respected him a lot, I really did. This is what is so very painful for me."  

(Hembree is the latest victim's sister, the one who recognized him on Dr. Phil) 

  

She said: "We thought a lot alike." 

  

A very good article on Narcissism by Dr. Sam Vaknin says: 

"The Narcissist is possessed of an uncanny ability to psychologically penetrate others. Often, this gift is abused and put at the service of the narcissist's control freakery and sadism. The Narcissist uses it liberally to annihilate the natural defences of his victims by faking unprecedented, almost inhuman, empathy. 

  

This capacity is coupled with the Narcissist's ability to frighteningly imitate emotions and their attendant behaviours. The Narcissist possesses "resonance tables". He keeps records of every action and reaction, every utterance and consequence, every datum provided by others regarding their state of mind and emotional make-up. From these, he then constructs a set of formulas which often result in impeccably and eerily accurate renditions of emotional behaviour. This is enormously deceiving." 

 

From what I have read - almost everyone who met that creep Hicks thought they & he had A LOT IN COMMON.  Con Men always make it seem like you have a CONNECTION.  Connie said the same thing about her con man. 

  

Someone should show this to Ms. Hembree and Ms. Grant before they do Good Morning America on 12/15/05!!  It might explain a few things to them. 

  

  

Just wanted to let you know that there is a way to know about people.  You have a wonderful life ahead of you.  

  

Dr. Phil said it all when he said, "Living Well is the Best Revenge".   ....That includes a life with a good person or without.    

  

I was taught to trust people - good people - but I got a life lesson in trust, confidence, faith, integrity, etc.   Now I know what I have are like diamonds (pearls) not to be given to swine. 

  

The rich get conned to, I think, however it is more difficult because they investigate before they mate. 

  

You are going to be just fine....you can love again with your EYES WIDE OPEN.    

  

I am so glad Dr. Phil did a show on my subject!   Isn't he just OPRAH'S gift to the world? 

  

Take care.