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Topic : 01/02 New Year: Old Habits

Number of Replies: 66
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Created on : Wednesday, December 28, 2005, 12:01:15 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
It's the start of a new year, and the perfect time to work on those pesky resolutions that you've been putting off for so long! Dr. Phil gives his guests a jump-start by helping them eliminate unwanted old habits. Rebecca and her sisters have an extreme fear of driving. They have to be chauffeured around by family and friends, and they're tired of being a burden on others. Find out what's behind their fears. Then, Gail thought she’d never be able to dig herself out from all the clutter in her home … until Dr. Phil gave her the surprise of a lifetime! Plus, meet a mom whose resolution is to get her family to pick up after themselves. She's so desperate that she started selling whatever they leave on the floor -- on eBay! Join the discussion.

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January 2, 2006, 7:00 am CST

EBay Selling

I just wanted to share that me and my 5 year old daughter were watching the show today about the lady selling the stuff on EBay.  My daughter watched the clip of the mom sowing the family everything that was sold and the kids reactions.  After the clip my daughter looked at me and said please don't do that to me.  I just thought that was cute and wanted to share it with everyone.  She really likes Dr. Phil.  When she saw me logging on to Dr.Phil's web page she said are you trying to get on the show or something.  Are kids cute or what.
 
January 2, 2006, 8:18 am CST

Excessive toys right after Christmas

 It's after Christmas, and it seems that they make children's toys bigger and bigger every year. We have a toy section in our living room, consisting of a shelving unit I built and a wooden storage box we bought from the home decor store.  Now, it's overflowing! I have 3 bins of children's toys stored in totes in my 3 yr old son's room.  My 1yr old daughter has her own "girlie" toys as well, and it's just getting to be too overwhelming.  Today, after talking to some old high school friends from the Philippines, I've decided to "ship" the outgrown and excess toys over there to give a little joy to the impoverished children (orphans and chronically ill).  For some of these kids, it may be the only toy they may get for the whole year.  I'm going to make this a yearly thing, since it only costs $55 to ship overseas by boat.   I figured this will make a great way to open up our children to part of their heritage (my hubby's from India, and I, the Philippines).  With God's help, we hope our children will never know poverty, but at the same time, we want them to learn to give and share in small ways, and big ways.

On a personal note, I wish Dr. Phil would come to my house and help me with all my clutter.  Does he have a lottery for this? How does he pick all these lucky people?  Since my kids were born, my home has been chaotic and growing with so much clutter.  I think it just grew through the years, more so when I was working (nurse hours in the hospital are really crazy!  ....Now that I'm a SAHM, I've been trying to chip into it little by little....but the kids need majority of my attention.....and as long as I keep them away from certain parts of my house, they're safe.  I've been getting rid of a lot of stuff through ebay.  It's help a little with the money situation since I'm not working anymore.  But I just can't seem to get rid of the clutter fast enough.  I've used the local freecycle.org to get rid of some things that don't sell on ebay.  But I also end up gathering stuff from other people through the site, too.   (my Dh calls it the "clutter trap.")  It's hard to let go of some things if I know there's a little monetary potential left in it that I can extract through ebay. 

Anyway, I bought the book by Jill M. and will try to start reading it this week to get a better clue.  Good luck to all the clutterbugs. 

My New Year's resolution: Get rid of the basement clutter, and have a more organized life for the sake of my family...esp. my kids!


 
January 2, 2006, 8:20 am CST

Snoozer Abuser

Anyone else out there like the lady who hits her snooze button?  Anyone conquer this bad habit?  I can get 6, 8, 10, 12 hours of sleep, it doesn't matter.  I am always tired in the morning and don't want to get up.  I even put my alarm across the room (my hubby's suggestion) and I get up, hit the snooze and go back to bed; this continues a few times.  I am lazy all day and never want to do anything and then I want to kick myself in the butt at night when the house is a mess.  I NEVER used to be like this til I lived with my husband.  I used to get up as soon as the alarm went off and he was the one who hit the snooze constantly; now it's the other way around.  I tried going back to my old ways, but can't do it.  I'd like to try the device Dr. Phil gave everyone on the show today, but I know I could never afford something like that.  Anyway, any help/advice/support appreciated.  :)
 
January 2, 2006, 10:06 am CST

This sounds like a habit and you do it because you can.

Quote From: pagirl74

Anyone else out there like the lady who hits her snooze button?  Anyone conquer this bad habit?  I can get 6, 8, 10, 12 hours of sleep, it doesn't matter.  I am always tired in the morning and don't want to get up.  I even put my alarm across the room (my hubby's suggestion) and I get up, hit the snooze and go back to bed; this continues a few times.  I am lazy all day and never want to do anything and then I want to kick myself in the butt at night when the house is a mess.  I NEVER used to be like this til I lived with my husband.  I used to get up as soon as the alarm went off and he was the one who hit the snooze constantly; now it's the other way around.  I tried going back to my old ways, but can't do it.  I'd like to try the device Dr. Phil gave everyone on the show today, but I know I could never afford something like that.  Anyway, any help/advice/support appreciated.  :)

For 4 months toss the alam clock unless you have to be somewhere at a specific time in fact remove all clocks from your bedroom.  Remove any TV from your bedroom too and phone also  Wake up naturally.   Get out of bed and make it as soon as you wake up.  Get dressed and put on your shoes.  You are not allow to lie down or remove your shoes for the rest of the day unless you are ill(this may sound strange but do it anyway).  If you smoke or drink coffee or drink soda stop at 6pm(it takes 4 to 6 hours to clear your system of amphetamines).  No food after 7pm.  Your kitchen should be clean by 7:30pm and no one should enter until the next morning.  Turn off the tv and phone and computer by 9pm.  The house should be very quiet 1 hour prior to bed.  Go to bed by 10pm.   

  

Make a list of every problem that your bad habit causes and the benifits of forming a new positive one.  Set a goal and reward yourself for keeping to your goal.  If getting up and being productive is important to you then you will do it.  Otherwise you will just keep up your lazy ways. 

  

Flylady.com has some good ideas about setting up morning routines and evening routines that I have found very helpful. 

  

  

 
January 2, 2006, 11:32 am CST

No alarm?

Quote From: lh2000

For 4 months toss the alam clock unless you have to be somewhere at a specific time in fact remove all clocks from your bedroom.  Remove any TV from your bedroom too and phone also  Wake up naturally.   Get out of bed and make it as soon as you wake up.  Get dressed and put on your shoes.  You are not allow to lie down or remove your shoes for the rest of the day unless you are ill(this may sound strange but do it anyway).  If you smoke or drink coffee or drink soda stop at 6pm(it takes 4 to 6 hours to clear your system of amphetamines).  No food after 7pm.  Your kitchen should be clean by 7:30pm and no one should enter until the next morning.  Turn off the tv and phone and computer by 9pm.  The house should be very quiet 1 hour prior to bed.  Go to bed by 10pm.   

  

Make a list of every problem that your bad habit causes and the benifits of forming a new positive one.  Set a goal and reward yourself for keeping to your goal.  If getting up and being productive is important to you then you will do it.  Otherwise you will just keep up your lazy ways. 

  

Flylady.com has some good ideas about setting up morning routines and evening routines that I have found very helpful. 

  

  

No Alarm for four months - Ya Right!!!!!!!  Sorry, that won't work with my schedule, nor will it work for my husband as.  some days i go to work at 2 a.m. and get done by 10:30 a.m. and other days I go to work at 1 p.m. and get done at 9:30 p.m.  How am I supposed to fix a schedule around those hours?  Granted, I am working on changing my shifts at work to be all the same but until then, what do I do??????? Jewels
 
January 2, 2006, 11:56 am CST

You can fix that

Quote From: jsdbaker

No Alarm for four months - Ya Right!!!!!!!  Sorry, that won't work with my schedule, nor will it work for my husband as.  some days i go to work at 2 a.m. and get done by 10:30 a.m. and other days I go to work at 1 p.m. and get done at 9:30 p.m.  How am I supposed to fix a schedule around those hours?  Granted, I am working on changing my shifts at work to be all the same but until then, what do I do??????? Jewels

Until you can have a daily routine then you can't fix it.  Your body is telling you that you are out of sync with its needs.  Every time you change your sleeping hours you are going to suffer no matter how many hours of sleep you get.  It is really not the number of hours it is the rhythm of your sleep.  If you can't let yourself sleep in a natural rhythm then your going to be less then rested when you get up.  If you must live with the schedule then you must live with the consequences and you are going to feel less then great.   I just hope you are young and this is a short term career.   The only thing you can do is cut yourself some slack making sure you eat right and get a good 4 hours of physical activity each week.   

 

 
January 2, 2006, 12:42 pm CST

Dr Phil Show.

Doctor Phil. I think drivingis good for everone in the family either if they are from USA Or any other --- 

country but you better tell Rebecca to start learnig how to drive a car in California especilly in Los--- 

Angeles, California. Well I had better close now.  Sincerley Your. Russell Vlaanderen.------------------ 

 
January 2, 2006, 12:49 pm CST

I agree with you completely

Quote From: indiagirl

Looks you have succeeded, and letting them know ahead of time, what you expect and consequences, is good parenting...I wish you well,  seems you have a handle on it. 

I myself have threatened to fill a garbage bag and throw out or give away...but...they were warned ahead of time, gotten very close to going thru with the disipline, but they managed to get the job done before the deadline and before I had to take the drastic measures, I had warned them about.   

Good Parenting is easier in the long run than Bad Parenting. Getting Respect is more likely when respect has been taught, in the first place. 

  

Theyre are other ways of managing "messy kids & family members" than doing it  sneakyly, without telling them and taking their items and selling them, is not my way, and I feel it is disrespectiful, I feel there are healthier ways to address the problem like "filindown" has found..... 

I agree that there are other ways of managing a family besides the drastic steps this woman took.  I was embarrassed for her family having to live with such over control.  I don't agree with Dr. Phil's advice on this one. It was very disrespectful of the woman. 
 
January 2, 2006, 1:42 pm CST

01/02 New Year: Old Habits

Quote From: geri511

 It's after Christmas, and it seems that they make children's toys bigger and bigger every year. We have a toy section in our living room, consisting of a shelving unit I built and a wooden storage box we bought from the home decor store.  Now, it's overflowing! I have 3 bins of children's toys stored in totes in my 3 yr old son's room.  My 1yr old daughter has her own "girlie" toys as well, and it's just getting to be too overwhelming.  Today, after talking to some old high school friends from the Philippines, I've decided to "ship" the outgrown and excess toys over there to give a little joy to the impoverished children (orphans and chronically ill).  For some of these kids, it may be the only toy they may get for the whole year.  I'm going to make this a yearly thing, since it only costs $55 to ship overseas by boat.   I figured this will make a great way to open up our children to part of their heritage (my hubby's from India, and I, the Philippines).  With God's help, we hope our children will never know poverty, but at the same time, we want them to learn to give and share in small ways, and big ways.

On a personal note, I wish Dr. Phil would come to my house and help me with all my clutter.  Does he have a lottery for this? How does he pick all these lucky people?  Since my kids were born, my home has been chaotic and growing with so much clutter.  I think it just grew through the years, more so when I was working (nurse hours in the hospital are really crazy!  ....Now that I'm a SAHM, I've been trying to chip into it little by little....but the kids need majority of my attention.....and as long as I keep them away from certain parts of my house, they're safe.  I've been getting rid of a lot of stuff through ebay.  It's help a little with the money situation since I'm not working anymore.  But I just can't seem to get rid of the clutter fast enough.  I've used the local freecycle.org to get rid of some things that don't sell on ebay.  But I also end up gathering stuff from other people through the site, too.   (my Dh calls it the "clutter trap.")  It's hard to let go of some things if I know there's a little monetary potential left in it that I can extract through ebay. 

Anyway, I bought the book by Jill M. and will try to start reading it this week to get a better clue.  Good luck to all the clutterbugs. 

My New Year's resolution: Get rid of the basement clutter, and have a more organized life for the sake of my family...esp. my kids!


Kids have too many toys because they are bought for them. For Christmas, my children got a few toys, everything that I knew they would play with, but mostly they got things that can use, such as comforters and other bedding stuff. Theya re only 3 and my oldest is going on 5 soon, these things were all theme related, (Elmo and Dora) and they loved them and thrilled to death! They also got clothing with their favorite themes along with music items and books. If parents allow themselves to go out and but every then of course the kids are goingt o get too much, I think it is we, the parents who need to stop getting hooked on buying for the kids, afterall, for the most part, our kids are happy with what they get.....I also go through their stuff on a regular basis and my soon to be five year old enjoys helping with that, it is all in the attitudes of the parents and what they are teaching the kids. Any way, just my two cents worth on kids accumulating too much which I believe can be controlled and it starts with the parents.
 
January 2, 2006, 1:52 pm CST

01/02 New Year: Old Habits

Quote From: barbdant

I agree that there are other ways of managing a family besides the drastic steps this woman took.  I was embarrassed for her family having to live with such over control.  I don't agree with Dr. Phil's advice on this one. It was very disrespectful of the woman. 
I didn't watch the show today but as far as the mother selling things on ebay, I think if she is doing it and not telling the kids and showing them after the fact then it is wrong. Kids need to know the rules and boundaries and at the same time, parents need to realize that they are still in the learning process and they do need reminded on accasions. Give them the guide lines and the time frame that they need and warn them of the consequences and then after all that, follow through with the consequences. As they grow older and wiser, they will realize that mom means business and in time they will not need the reminders. We are here to help teach and huide our children, not to embarasse or manipulate them.
 
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