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Topic : 01/03 Love Resolutions

Number of Replies: 128
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Created on : Wednesday, December 28, 2005, 12:02:44 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
It's a new year and time for resolutions! If you're looking to put the spark back into your marriage or find the relationship you've always dreamed of, this is your year to turn your love life around. Dr. Phil's first guests say they've lost that "lovin' feelin'" in their marriage because they bicker about everything -- from what to watch on TV to who should drive the car. Will they learn to become the stars in their own marriage? Then, Dr. Phil follows up with Janet and Noelle, who are determined to find a man. After reading Love Smart and brushing up on their dating skills, how will their next dates go? And Jeannie and Jo-Ann are back to get more dating advice from Dr. Phil. It's time for these guests -- and you -- to get a love fix in 2006! Share your thoughts.

Find out what happened on the show.

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January 10, 2006, 9:30 pm CST

01/03 Love Resolutions

Quote From: litsky8

Dear Depressed in S.C. 

  

I too have been abused for many years and I can truly empathize with your situation.  I just want to give you a bit of hope.  I don't know if you pray but I know that my life brought me down to my knees and I have come to know that God does answer prayers.   

  

Your ex-husband may have money, another woman....But don't think for one moment that he will get away with all that he has done to you.  God does not like his tender daughters hurt by anyone especially by their spouses.  Leave it all in God's hands and work on yourself. 

  

You have the power within yourself to fight depression.  Personally, I needed to go to a psychologist.  She has been wonderful.  I am now healed and although I am very cautious I am free to love again and I have my psychologist helping me weed possible prospects.  I too have alot of fear and sometimes I am ready to run from situations due to my past and she is able to help me see when it is me.  All to say, that with the right guidance and support and your own will power and prayers...YOU CAN DO WHATEVER YOU WANT TO DO IN LIFE.  Please don't give up on yourself or life.  If I have healed to this point, SO CAN YOU. 

I really needed your kind words tonight so thanks for your message to me.  Oh yes, I am a big prayer warrior and my faith is what has carried me through these hard times.  This past Friday I received a letter from Social Security telling me that the IRS had reported to them that I had earned $65,000.00 last year and this disqualifies me from receiving anymore benefits from Social Security.  After I picked myself up off the floor, remember I already told you I was in a homeless shelter last year, I started making phone calls and found out that my ex had sold some property and to keep from paying taxes, I assume, he reported the money under my social security number. 

  

He knew that this would make me lose all my income and medical benefits and I am so stressed all I can do is cry.  I wrote Social Security a book on how he has done me and sent them proof that I was homeless but this doesn't mean that they won't take my benefits away.  If you have an extra prayer, would you send one up fpor me, please?      

 
January 13, 2006, 10:32 am CST

wow...

Quote From: sprout

On Nov 12,2005 I remarried my ex-husband, We married the first  time in 1994 divorced in 2000, Following my husband's near fatal motorcycle accident, the day before our plan weekend together. we are back together.  this is where I should be, but don't want to make the same mistake as before which let us to be apart. Any suggestions?
Well, the only thing I can say is: communicate! If you don't talk to each other enough, things might get difficult sometimes
 
January 14, 2006, 4:46 am CST

look back on what your mistakes were

Quote From: sabouma

Well, the only thing I can say is: communicate! If you don't talk to each other enough, things might get difficult sometimes

I'd reflect on what happened on my part to cause the relationship to break apart and I'd seriously think about getting some marital counciling if you are both commited to making this relationship better. You have to be aware of what has to be fixed.  

  

How you communicate is just as important as whether or not you communicate.  I know one thing I've had to work on in my marriage is not treating and speaking my husband as a child. I started to speak to him a friend, and that made a big difference in how he would respond to me.  

  

Good luck!! 

 
January 17, 2006, 1:58 pm CST

you're so right...

Quote From: kmsadr

I'd reflect on what happened on my part to cause the relationship to break apart and I'd seriously think about getting some marital counciling if you are both commited to making this relationship better. You have to be aware of what has to be fixed.  

  

How you communicate is just as important as whether or not you communicate.  I know one thing I've had to work on in my marriage is not treating and speaking my husband as a child. I started to speak to him a friend, and that made a big difference in how he would respond to me.  

  

Good luck!! 

I know exactly what you mean... me and my boyfriend often have the same problem, but it's from both sides. But I've started to work on my part, so I hope things will turn out for the better soon...
 
January 22, 2006, 7:38 am CST

luv resolution

Quote From: sprout

On Nov 12,2005 I remarried my ex-husband, We married the first  time in 1994 divorced in 2000, Following my husband's near fatal motorcycle accident, the day before our plan weekend together. we are back together.  this is where I should be, but don't want to make the same mistake as before which let us to be apart. Any suggestions?
 "love your husband like it's his day on earth"
 
January 23, 2006, 1:12 am CST

Love Does Hurt especially after 15 years

It is early in the morning and I have had trouble sleeping for the last 7 days because the woman that I fell in love with 15 yrs ago left me again. The first she was seperated from her husband and we met and fell in love it was like we were soul mates, but as we talked I found out that she could not have kids and I wanted a child so we broke up, it was heart felt and it hurt for both of us.

  

 

  

We both knew it was the right thing at the right time. I called every 2 or 3 years to see how she was doing and if everything was ok. During that period she did divorce her husband and met another guy, on his be half was great from what she said but it was one of those non whole hearted it was great.

  

 

  

About 3 months ago I get a call from Linda, and she asks if I was single and did not do the drugs, alcohol or was abusive? I told Linda I never have and never will be she said good, because I need some one like that in my life I said I have waited for 13 years to be with you, there has never been any one including my ex-wife who I had a child with that could ever take the love and spirit and soul I had with you.

  

 

  

Linda and I spent the thanksgiving, christmas and new years holiday together. I supported her with the restraining order to keep the ex-boyfriend away. I let her know I was going to come and move in with her and leave my job and move 300 miles to be with her and we could make a life, we never argued unless it dealt with her ex calling and trying to get her back by saying it was because of her and everything in his life that he turned to drugs and alcohol and being abusive.

  

 

  

  

 

  

I love Linda with all my heart and soul she is a very big part of my life and I trued to understand that she needed to talk to him to get the past closed.

  

 

  

  

 

  

Linda likes your show and says Dr Phil says in a relationship you give a 100%, which I did and she did, every one in both our families think we go great together and we she be together, as much as I do.

  

 

  

  

 

  

So it was devistating when she said one day out of the blue with out warning that she needed time to think and needed her space because her ex just had clled and wanted to talk to her about his life, I warned her what he was going to do about the sympathy and poor me, I need you to try and make up for the 11 yrs you did not understand.

  

 

  

  

 

  

Two days later Linda calls me and says she is going back to ex, which is killing me I love this lady and I can not stand not being without her and she feeels the same way she is just with the ex because she has the Florence Nightengale image she feels she can fix him of doing the drugs, drinking and be abusive.

  

 

  

  

 

  

Her son, who I get along with does not even want to go over ther anymore, because of it but the daughter who liked the ex is now coming back over, so she tradr one child for another. Linda's family contacted me the other day and asked if I had heard from Linda and I said the last time she was having a nervous break down because she knew she made a mistake by gong back and that she had lost her family and friend on both mine and her side, she is like an island out there the same as her daughter was because no one really thought highly of her daughters boyfriend or Linda's ex. They were like two peas in a pod and heading down the wrong path.

  

 

  

  

 

  

I love Linda it is so obvious, and I want to help her not just for me but for her she is a very giving and caring lady and very beautiful to me I adore her, but she is killing me being with someone that is using her and I cannot stand to lose her again, please help I am not one to ask for help and neither is Linda, but I need to, I am at my wits end.

  

 

  

 
January 23, 2006, 3:10 pm CST

Thank you

Quote From: bakerboy99

   I don't know if your gonna ever get this message jeannie but i thought what the heck don't know if i don't try lol.  I think that your a very pretty woman and would love to get to know you better ;).  I am a man that loves a person for what they have inside and outside not just looks.  The looks are a bonus when it comes to you :).  You seem like a very kindhearted woman and hope to hear back from ya if not then can't say i didn't try.  Guess i will wait and see what happens.  Take care and keep that pretty face smiling because you never know who might be falling in love with it :).

Thanks for the compliment! I am taking Dr. Phil's advise, I am working on me. It is going well. I will be on again soon. Again, thanks Jeannie 

 
January 23, 2006, 3:11 pm CST

Thanks

Quote From: sidvicious

 Da, da...da-da, da-DA-da...da, da--

OK Dr. Phil, here's your chance to help somebody with their love fix!  Somebody who NEEDS it, not just some spoiled "beauty queen" who pays too much attention to footwear.

I like Jeannie.  She's very pretty!  I like her sense of humor.  She's not a "clown"; the person who told her such is obviously an idiot.

Here are my qualifications:

1)  I have a JOB!  Jeannie's number one criteria.  Her only one, I think, but I come with an added bounus--

I also have a PULSE!

The  man who called her  "ugly" or  "fat" must have been looking in the mirror, or he needed an eye exam.  I can assure you that my optometric prescriptions are all current.

If my picture ever uploads, you can even see what I look like.  I don't drink, so it's more of a pizza belly.  Or pastarmi belly.

I have to get to work.  I just wanted to let you know I'd take Jeannie in a heartbeat.

th-thump.

...and there it is.




I wanted to thank you for the compliment! Cute pic! Jeannie
 
January 23, 2006, 7:56 pm CST

Not sure how one can help

Quote From: instgate

It is early in the morning and I have had trouble sleeping for the last 7 days because the woman that I fell in love with 15 yrs ago left me again. The first she was seperated from her husband and we met and fell in love it was like we were soul mates, but as we talked I found out that she could not have kids and I wanted a child so we broke up, it was heart felt and it hurt for both of us.

  

 

  

We both knew it was the right thing at the right time. I called every 2 or 3 years to see how she was doing and if everything was ok. During that period she did divorce her husband and met another guy, on his be half was great from what she said but it was one of those non whole hearted it was great.

  

 

  

About 3 months ago I get a call from Linda, and she asks if I was single and did not do the drugs, alcohol or was abusive? I told Linda I never have and never will be she said good, because I need some one like that in my life I said I have waited for 13 years to be with you, there has never been any one including my ex-wife who I had a child with that could ever take the love and spirit and soul I had with you.

  

 

  

Linda and I spent the thanksgiving, christmas and new years holiday together. I supported her with the restraining order to keep the ex-boyfriend away. I let her know I was going to come and move in with her and leave my job and move 300 miles to be with her and we could make a life, we never argued unless it dealt with her ex calling and trying to get her back by saying it was because of her and everything in his life that he turned to drugs and alcohol and being abusive.

  

 

  

  

 

  

I love Linda with all my heart and soul she is a very big part of my life and I trued to understand that she needed to talk to him to get the past closed.

  

 

  

  

 

  

Linda likes your show and says Dr Phil says in a relationship you give a 100%, which I did and she did, every one in both our families think we go great together and we she be together, as much as I do.

  

 

  

  

 

  

So it was devistating when she said one day out of the blue with out warning that she needed time to think and needed her space because her ex just had clled and wanted to talk to her about his life, I warned her what he was going to do about the sympathy and poor me, I need you to try and make up for the 11 yrs you did not understand.

  

 

  

  

 

  

Two days later Linda calls me and says she is going back to ex, which is killing me I love this lady and I can not stand not being without her and she feeels the same way she is just with the ex because she has the Florence Nightengale image she feels she can fix him of doing the drugs, drinking and be abusive.

  

 

  

  

 

  

Her son, who I get along with does not even want to go over ther anymore, because of it but the daughter who liked the ex is now coming back over, so she tradr one child for another. Linda's family contacted me the other day and asked if I had heard from Linda and I said the last time she was having a nervous break down because she knew she made a mistake by gong back and that she had lost her family and friend on both mine and her side, she is like an island out there the same as her daughter was because no one really thought highly of her daughters boyfriend or Linda's ex. They were like two peas in a pod and heading down the wrong path.

  

 

  

  

 

  

I love Linda it is so obvious, and I want to help her not just for me but for her she is a very giving and caring lady and very beautiful to me I adore her, but she is killing me being with someone that is using her and I cannot stand to lose her again, please help I am not one to ask for help and neither is Linda, but I need to, I am at my wits end.

  

 

  

 I read your post and I think it is admirable that you have cared for her all of these years. But I'm a little confused as to what kind of help you want? Ultimately it's Linda's decision who she is going to be with. In my small birds eye view, I think you have spent way too much of your precious, only going through it once, life pining over her.

 I feel terrible that she choses to stay with someone that abuses her. But you have to make a choice too. You can live and move on, or stay in this mess that I think will only be messier with time. Linda may be a beautiful woman but it's not right for her to leave him, go back with you, leave you, go back with him. It seems like she has some character issues too. And that also makes me sad, because I'm sure her kids have suffered the most.

Good luck with whatever you do. Personally in my little OPINION,  I think you deserve something better in your life.

Take care.

Mary
 
January 24, 2006, 9:13 am CST

mover on

Quote From: instgate

It is early in the morning and I have had trouble sleeping for the last 7 days because the woman that I fell in love with 15 yrs ago left me again. The first she was seperated from her husband and we met and fell in love it was like we were soul mates, but as we talked I found out that she could not have kids and I wanted a child so we broke up, it was heart felt and it hurt for both of us.

  

 

  

We both knew it was the right thing at the right time. I called every 2 or 3 years to see how she was doing and if everything was ok. During that period she did divorce her husband and met another guy, on his be half was great from what she said but it was one of those non whole hearted it was great.

  

 

  

About 3 months ago I get a call from Linda, and she asks if I was single and did not do the drugs, alcohol or was abusive? I told Linda I never have and never will be she said good, because I need some one like that in my life I said I have waited for 13 years to be with you, there has never been any one including my ex-wife who I had a child with that could ever take the love and spirit and soul I had with you.

  

 

  

Linda and I spent the thanksgiving, christmas and new years holiday together. I supported her with the restraining order to keep the ex-boyfriend away. I let her know I was going to come and move in with her and leave my job and move 300 miles to be with her and we could make a life, we never argued unless it dealt with her ex calling and trying to get her back by saying it was because of her and everything in his life that he turned to drugs and alcohol and being abusive.

  

 

  

  

 

  

I love Linda with all my heart and soul she is a very big part of my life and I trued to understand that she needed to talk to him to get the past closed.

  

 

  

  

 

  

Linda likes your show and says Dr Phil says in a relationship you give a 100%, which I did and she did, every one in both our families think we go great together and we she be together, as much as I do.

  

 

  

  

 

  

So it was devistating when she said one day out of the blue with out warning that she needed time to think and needed her space because her ex just had clled and wanted to talk to her about his life, I warned her what he was going to do about the sympathy and poor me, I need you to try and make up for the 11 yrs you did not understand.

  

 

  

  

 

  

Two days later Linda calls me and says she is going back to ex, which is killing me I love this lady and I can not stand not being without her and she feeels the same way she is just with the ex because she has the Florence Nightengale image she feels she can fix him of doing the drugs, drinking and be abusive.

  

 

  

  

 

  

Her son, who I get along with does not even want to go over ther anymore, because of it but the daughter who liked the ex is now coming back over, so she tradr one child for another. Linda's family contacted me the other day and asked if I had heard from Linda and I said the last time she was having a nervous break down because she knew she made a mistake by gong back and that she had lost her family and friend on both mine and her side, she is like an island out there the same as her daughter was because no one really thought highly of her daughters boyfriend or Linda's ex. They were like two peas in a pod and heading down the wrong path.

  

 

  

  

 

  

I love Linda it is so obvious, and I want to help her not just for me but for her she is a very giving and caring lady and very beautiful to me I adore her, but she is killing me being with someone that is using her and I cannot stand to lose her again, please help I am not one to ask for help and neither is Linda, but I need to, I am at my wits end.

  

 

  

move on and start dating other women.  how could you want to be with someone that is so flighty thaey run  at the first time someone says they need her help, and she cheatwd on you.  thats nasty in and of itself.  sounds to me like she needs to grow and and start being faithful to one man and let the past go
 
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