Quote From: emgrad73My weight story isn't exactly unforgettable but I wish to share it anyway if I may do so. My weight has always been a problem for me and my eating habits haven't always been good. My weight has now ballooned up to 260lbs after having just lost 5lbs which for me is a good thing. My being overweight is not good as I am a diabetic and need to lose at least 100lbs. My weight has contributed in some ways to my being suffering with depression and thus I ate to feel good about myself which was only a front. My life started spiraling after my mothers death back in 2001 and with her death I slowly started making all the wrong decisions which only increased my depression and thus my further weight gain. I finally confronted a deep secret I had been carrying around with me for years,something I could never bring my self to let surface until after my mothers death. I had been living with the fact that my brother had molested me when I was a impressionable teenager.
This is turn caused me to have very low/little self esteem thus again I ate to feel good about myself. I felt that no man would want anything to do with if they ever found out my secret so I made many a wrong choice when it came to relationships and my dealing with them the way I should have. All this will probably sound like nothing but excuses but it was all I had to explain my weight gain,at least to myself. I have in fact confronted my brother about his actions but he made no move to defent himself,his wife called me a lier and thus my albeit a strained relationship with my brother has ended,I now consider him dead,but the hurt will never go away. I can never forgive him for what he did to me nor can I forgive myself for allowing it to ever happen.
All this has contributed to my depression but I hope I am able to pick myself up and work through this. I am at present living with a friend who is helping me with my losing weight as he himself is on a diet too and he is helping me re-think my eating habits and eating only what I should,thus the 5lbs weight loss I mentioned earlier. This is only one small step but for me that is important,one day at a time. Most times I don't consider myself to be overweight,I find that I see myself differently then those around me and don't really worry about how they see me but then I realize that this is just my way of dealing with it and then I am once again back down in the dumps. I do have one saving grace that keeps me grounded,I enjoy writing poems. This takes my mind off my problems if only for a little while and then right back to where I was before.As long as God allows me to wake up one more day I shall try and do so with a smile though I know I will still have the problem with the depression as that is a road that is going to be harder to travel.
Congratulations...5 pounds! That's a start.
Please consider seeing a counselor or psychiatrist about your depression. The right medications can make a world of difference.
I, too, was molested by one of my older brothers. I never could understand why it bothered me so much as an adult. It was so many years ago. When my mom died in 1991, the whole thing blew up in my face. I fell into a deep depression, also fueled by other personal events at the time. I ended up in the psych ward. Through counseling and medication, I have learned to deal with it and not let it run my life. I am in contact with my brother. I love him. Other than the abuse, he was always there when I needed help with a school project. He was on his school's diving team, and he taught me some really cool dives. He was never mean to me. I have not confronted him. I don't know if I ever will. If I do, it will be less a confrontation than a discussion. I will keep it confidential, just between us. I may never work up the nerve to do it. I went through anger and depression...I will no longer let it run my life. I have Bipolar disorder...I have enough to deal with.
I posted my weight loss story earlier today.
I'll pray for you, for success, and help with your depression, that God will heal your hurts.
Signed, mustbecrazy
(Original Air Date 01/04/06) Have you ever stepped on the scale and thought, "That number can't be right"? You don’t have to wait until the new year to resolve to lose weight or eat healthy. Kristine stopped making excuses for her weight and lost over 100 pounds, thanks to Dr. Phil's words of wisdom. See what Dr. Phil has in store for her. Then, Nicole is only 25 but morbidly obese. After a wake-up call from her family, friends, and Dr. Phil, will she find the courage and motivation to get healthy? And, is it possible to reach your weight loss goal and still be miserable? See one woman's shocking reality. Through the stories of these three women, losing weight becomes an emotional as well as a physical journey. Share your weight loss stories and challenges here.
