Topic : 08/22 Unforgettable Weight Stories

I AM 60 YRS OLD, ENGLISH LADY LIVING IN EGYPT. In the past I had weight problems due to being 8 years on steriods for ill health, my weight went up to 18 stone, i think that's about 250 pounds. I managed eventually to lose weight, it took years of yo-yo diets, before I actually managed it and dropped  8 dress sizes.  Some time later I moved to Egypt, where I have lived for 5 years. I have now gained weight again, now I am about  168 pounds but here in Egypt I have many problems over food. 1st, I am vegetarian, have been for 15 years, in the UK there are many choices for veggies, here they never cater for vegetarians, if you tell an Egyptian you don't eat meat, they will ask if you want fish or chicken. Plus anything they cook for you and say contains NO meat is usually cooked in meat stock, even the rice or soups. I cooked a veggie meal for a doctor friend, when he told his mother that he would like to be vegetarian her reply was 'You'll be dead in a month'.  I cannot buy soya products, no soya milk, I can't drink ordinary milk because of a health problem, same for yoghurt, the only dairy I tolerate is cheese.

 

I am not really 'into' cooking and Egyptian men aren't really interested in 'food fads', they want their meat and rice etc.  i seem to live on eggs, cheese, and now tinned tuna, yes I know that goes against being veggie, but I am so limited here. I eat some veggies, but not as many as I should, many of the things I like are not available, they eat a lot of Okra and courgettes, both of which I don't like.  we can't get low fat varieties of anything, what makes it worse is I live in a very small place, not a big city, Cairo is about 10 hours away on a bus, so too far to 'pop to the shops'.

 

I also still have loose 'flab' from the previous weight loss and to be honest at the moment I am so depressed, none of my clothes fit me, I have a cupboard full of stuff that is too small, it's hard to buy stuff here, I am living in the same outfit all the time, it has now got where I haven't been out for weeks, I stay home, just go to the store for food shopping, by taxi, door to door ,about every 10 days. I walk the dog at 5.30am when it gets light, its too hot to walk him in the day, but my health is suffering from bad diet and getting overweight, lack of vitamins and essential food items.  I look at Dr Phil's diet sheet, there is almost nothing there I can buy or eat and now I don't know what to do. I am too depressed to bother, I am getting too old to start exercise again and too tired. i have just about given up.  I just feel I want to lie in bed all day and not bother.  I really need help and don't know where to go to get it. We have no slimming clubs, no Gym, no anything really.  I think if I don't find some help soon i will just give up on everything, I have no enthusiasm or motivation to do anything at all. I feel like I am sitting at the bottom of a huge pit and can't even bother to try to get out, just sitting waiting for the sides to fall in on me.

Prevously I said sometimes I wish I were dead, I'm not suicidal but it is just cruel what life does to a person.  I went out with a man one time and we were getting closer and decided to be intimate and when he saw me with my clothes off he said" Gee you look great in your clothes what happened"  We never saw each other again.  My sister said before I got my gastric bypass " Well, you still hve all the fat hanging on even if you lose weight"  and laughed.  I also lost aman because he didn't like me losing weight.  aI would so much like to live and be truwly happy but people in your life make you less than happy about things you do to help yourself.  Sometimes I just would like to be able to look at myself in a mirror naked and say I like what I see.  They say beauty is skin deep well when you have all that skinto look through, people don't even want to be bothered to look for inner beauty, they just take you at face value.  I am basically happy and happy with my surgery and weight loss regardless of the people around me.  I would encourage anyone to get the surgery if they want it.  The people around you with negative words and actions are only trying to control you maybe to make themselves feel superior.

Last August I began excercising by riding my bike.  My youngest child was one at the time and I was at my fattest and unhealthiest that I had ever been.  I was miserable.  I started going back to the gym about the first of September of 2005.  I began doing a Les Mills program called Bodypump.  It was fantastic and still is.  I lost a little weight but not too much.  In October I continued to go to the gym and hired a personal trainer who put me on the FIT program (Females In Training) and I also began attending a Why Weight? class that works on nutrition guidelines.  FIT included weight training and the why weight class was simply to help me learn the nutritional needs of my body.  AKA what is healthy for the world!!  I changed my diet and began working out at least 2 hours a day.  I continued to do Bodypump 2-3 times per week.  I have gradually made changes in my weight training to keep from getting bored and have now become certified in Group Fitness.  I teach 3 classes a week and I am working on completeing my certification to teach Bodypump at my gym.  I am so happy and healthy.  And yes I do have an occasional treat!  It can be done!!!  Everyone out there can do it.  I have lost about 60lbs and dropped from a size 16/18 to a size 8.  I feel better than ever!  I do have issues with loose skin especially in the abdomen area however it's worth it to feel this good.  Hopefully someday I will have the courage and money to get a tummy tuck to take care of that.

 

Get Fit!

 I understand how the girls feel when they are so overweight.  I am at the most I have ever been and I hate myself.  I have trouble putting my shoes on and tying them.  I am tired just doing everday things.

I feel I am in a catch 22 as I have doctor's orders not to be on my feet any more than absolutely necessary due to a major foot reconstrutive surgery April of 2005 and the bones are not healing where the 2 major pins are.  I feeel as I sit that the weight is just falling on. 

I have sat at this computer for hours in the middle of the night and looked out at the dark streets wondering if I should just get in the car and drive until I can't go any more. Then I realize what it would do to my family and to our grandson that is living with us. 

I hate myself and do not look in the mirror anymore than I have to.  I feel as if everyone is looking at me and saying how fat and ugly I am. My friend and I used to say that if we got to looking like a certain person or figure to promise to shoot each other and I wish she would.  I don't have hope except in the Lord.  I pray he will help me when I get this foot taken care of.

I want to be able to get on the floor and play with my grandkids and great grandkids.  I can't even baby sit with them as I can't keep up with the little ones that are walking now.  

Have you watching what you eat? Losing weight is like 80% diet, at least for me it is. Don't get me wrong, exercise is great, it's SO important, but for you, maybe you should focus on diet for now.

Could you get some dumbells and exercise your upper body? Do some butterfly moves, some curls. It's better than nothing.

I'm so sorry life is like this for you.

All my life I struggled with my weight.  While i was never fat, I was always chubby.  I was always hoving around 20-25 lbs overweight.  My life revolved around food.  Being Italian, family gatherings always centered around cooking, eating and washing it all down with wine.  At my fattest, i was a size 10.  (I'm 5 foot and a petite frame) so thats not good.  Like Dr. Phil says, Stop making excuses, own up to it.  So I did.  I stopped making excuses for being Too tired, or too sick to go work out.  I started getting up at 5 am to go running.  I signed up for a 1/2 marathon and stopped focusing on food as entertainment, but as fuel for my body.  While I was eating, I constantly imagined a little gas tank gauge.  The more I ate, the more I filled up, and when I was comfortable, I stopped eating, regardless of how gooood it tasted. 

 

Most importantly, I am a busy woman.  but I stopped making excusing and stopped putting EVERYTHING ahead of myself.  The dishes came before me, my husband, the laundry, the dog, etc.  Everything had to be done before I could take the time for myself.  Well forget that.  I get home from work, and I take the time for myself.  My running is my chance to get away and just run.  Leave my problems behind and just run away from them.  I ate a healthy dinner, but with portion control, and went to bed everynight at 9:30 - 10 so that I could have a full 8 hours before tomorrow's run.  If the dishes weren't done and the laundry wasn't done, so what?  Put yourself back on your priority list.  You first, your husband next, your children third, and the housework should fall somewhere behind there.  I also gave myself the greatest gift I could give myself.  Flexability and forgiveness.  If the alarm went off at 5 and I was still feeling like I REALLY needed another hour, I slept in, but damned if I wasn't going to run after work.  and Forgiveness that sometimes, I have a bad run.  Sometimes, I just can't get out there and hit the pavement.  and thats ok.  Days off are always good too. 

 

As soon as I took the time for myself.  I foudn that I had more energy to tackle the things I thought I would be too tired to do.  After I shower, I usually get intimate with my husband, and feel empowered by the way my body is changing.  I've lost 15 lbs with just another 10 to go, and I will be exactly where I want to be.  Like Nike says, Just do it. 

I had a baby in 1/05 and now weigh 113 pounds.  I haven't ever really struggled with weight  but I have to vent a little bit.  I am very happy for those that have struggled and have lost the weight but quite frankly I don't understand why the rewards from others are so intense.  I haven't received a vacation because I lost weight.  Where is my vacation for maintaining a healthy weight and healthy lifestyle???  I am in no way biased or opinionated against overweight people, in fact, I was the one in high school who got into fights defending those that were picked on.  I think people that want to loose weight need to do it for themselves, not for a reward or an incentive.  Same thing goes for people that drink to much or do drugs,  no one can help themselves but themselves.  I struggle with my appearance all the time because society demands us to be thin, however, my little one is all the exercise I need and I eat healthy.  I truly don't get why some other women can't do the same.  I have one child and he wears me out.  I don't understand how women with multiple children can become overweight.  Once you're little one begins to walk and talk you're life is unscheduled for the next 18 years.  My mother had 5 kids and never was overweight.  I'm not judging anyone I'm truly trying to understand why this is so hard for some people, why does it take a reward to loose the weight, and what  recognition do I get for not letting myself go.  Please, anyone that reads this, do not lash out at me, I'm really trying to help myself understand.  I have many friends struggling with weight and I want to be a better friend and knowledgable on how to help, not hurt.  Any advice or suggestions, please help me.

 

Thank you

Renee

I grew up with normal body weight, although I thought I was fat.  I gained a few pounds with each baby I had (3 boys).  My cholesterol levels were excellent.  I wore a size 5 when we got married, 25 years ago.

 

Then, a few years ago, I was started on a medication for Bipolar disorder, Risperdal.  This medication made me gain 50 pounds over a period of 9 months.  I was up to a size 24, and obesity was added to my list of diagnosis on my medical record.  I was switched to another medication, Depakote, which caused more weight gain.  I was hungry all the time and ate much more than I should have.  I had an insatiable craving for sweets all the time.  It wasn't about "will power".  The larger I got, the less energy I had.  My cholesterol levels went awry.  My triglycerides were way high, my LDL was way high, and my HDL was down to 4. (normal HDL is 40).

 

Last May, I asked my doctor to help me research the medications for Bipolar disorder for one that doesn't cause weight gain.  I was started on Lamictal, and immediately started losing about a pound per week.  I also found out near that time that I have Narcolepsy, which causes extreme daytime sleepiness.  I slept most of the day, and would fall asleep driving if I didn't' take a nap first.  When I had a sleep study done, Narcolepsy was the diagnosis.  Provigil was prescribed for that.

 

I now have more energy than I ever had, although I am still tired at times.  I have lost 50 pounds in the last year.  I am down to a size 16 and some 14.  I got rid of all my "fat" clothes...donated them to our church garage sale.  One of my friends picked up one of the pairs of pants and said "These are huge...they must be about a size 24!"  I said that they used to be mine.  She couldn't believe it.  What a good feeling.  I have lost 1/3 of my former body weight.  My goal is 130-135 pounds, and a size 10.  All my weight seems to be in my tummy.  People have stopped asking me when I am due! (I was done with pregnancy 8 years ago).

 

Dr. Phil, there are some people out there for whom there is an outside cause for their weight gain. Obvoiusly, eating less (I've always eaten healthy, just too much of it), being more active (still working on that), and getting rid of the clothes as I shrink out of them are good steps.  I read your book, and although I was sexually abused as a child, I didn't really relate to that chapter.  I am not an emotional eater.  My weight stayed stable for years...until the medications caused my obesity.  I am still losing weight, but some major surgeries recently (gallbladder, mastectomy, hysterectomy, breast reconstruction) have slowed my ability for physical activity.  I take a walk when it is not too hot out.  I have a stair stepping stool that I can use indoors when I am watching your show.  I have a "fat" picture of myself on the fridge that I use to discourage unneccesary snacking...get a glass of water instead.  I have not changed what I eat, just eat less of it...portion control.  I don't feel guilty about eating the occasional  fun-size candy bar or small piece of cake or pie.

 

Many of the foods in Dr. Phil's food guide are on my list of allergies...nuts, oats, milk products, some fruits, etc.  Also, many of the foods are expensive.  It is unfortunate that eating unhealthy foods, high in carbs is less expensive than eating healthy.  Potatoes and rice are cheap.  Fatty cuts of meat and poultry are also less expensive.  We are on a tight budget, but we manage to limit the unhealthy high-cholesterol, high carb foods.  Actually, my food allergies keep me from eating a lot that I shouldn't.

 

I am now  helping my husband lose weight.  He is diabetic with high blood pressure, high cholesterol, sleep apnea, restless leg syndrome, thyroid troubles, diabetic stomache paralysis, and depression.  Motivation for physical activity and being constantly hungry are his biggest stumbling blocks.  He has recently lost 12 pounds.  We are building a deck and patio cover.  Those trips up and down the ladder, carrying wood, hammering, etc. have boosted his energy level an improved his back pain.  The activity also seems to calm the restless legs (along with medication).  Some of his medications have weight gain on their list of side effects.  He sometimes skips meals, then his blood sugar drops, and he has to have sugared pop and/or candy to bring it up.  Then, he bounces too high in blood sugar and has to set his insulin pump to take more insulin.  Because of the diabetic stomache paralysis, my husband should not eat too much fiber.  It is a challenge, but he is determined.  He has been frustrated that he was continuing to gain weight, but is trying to eat less and exercise more.  I'm worried that when winter comes, or when he gets bored with it, that the physical activity will decrease, and his weight will come back.

 

I have stopped buying the ice cream that he loves to eat.  He asked me not to buy it, and then got mad when he didn't have it.  I stood firm and said that it was his request not to have ice cream and other high carb foods around to tempt him.  We are committed to eating healthy and eating less.

 

We have 3 growing, skinny boys who have "hollow legs" and seem to be constantly hungry.  We don't have potato chips around.  If the boys want chips, we have tortilla chips, and salsa.  We subsitute corn flakes for potato chips.  It is difficult to keep them eating enough, while we eat less.  They all like their veggies...we started them eating healthy from the start.  We also have crackers in the house, but we measure the portion size when serving them, to limit the intake.

 

Dr. Phil, could you write another cook book for people who are on a tight budget?

 

Ok, maybe you don't understand...this is a TV show. They are trying to get ratings. No one is going to watch a show about a perfect person who gets rewards for being perfect.  LOL

Your reward is that fact that you haven't struggled, that you haven't had those issues. I know I would rather have had a nice body my whole life and not be fat instead of a vacation any day of the week! Seriously...you have the better end of the bargain here.

"I truly don't get why some other women can't do the same."

Because, now this is a radical idea so be prepared: We are all different. We each see life differently, react differently and live differently.  LOL

"I have one child and he wears me out.  I don't understand how women with multiple children can become overweight. "

People get fat because they eat more calories than they burn.  That is all. There is no mystery. Now, some people make poor food choices, some people have slower metabolisms, some people eat out of stress and emotion. I'm sorry if you don't "understand" that, but it's a fact.

Not everyone is just like you, obviously, because there are a lot of fat mothers in the world. So obviously your lack of understanding is your problem, not theirs.

I am not lashing out at you, I promise, I am simply stating what I think.

People become addicted to bad eating. It's not hard to do, it's an easy habit to fall into.

You sound jealous that there are people who get rewarded for overcoming a huge obstacle. Maybe that is what you aren't understanding.

Staying thin is not an obstacle for you, it's easy for you. So you don't understand. What is something that is hard for you? Think of one of your flaws. Now imagine WEARING a sign that hast that flaw in big bold neon letters.  That is what is like to be very fat. Imagine someone looking at your sign and saying "Man, why doesn't Renee just stop doing that! I have no trouble with that! I can't understand why she would!"

Do you see what I am saying here?

I'm 52 and I need to lose at least 100 lbs.  After years of abuse, I try so hard just to get up every day, but then I look in the mirror and wonder why I bothered.  Image isn't everything but self-image is a  very difficult issue for me.  At least being obese, I'm invisible to others, most of the time.  Ever notice that the only time an obese person is "seen" in this country is when someone needs to vent and picks on the "fat" person or a comedian needs fodder for his routine?    I almost never leave the house any more because the few times I was visible I was verbally attacked by strangers who seemed to resent that I shared their air space.  (E.g., I was in the car drinking a bottle of water when a group of college guys pulled alongside and yelled at me, "Drink your water you fat ass.")  Yes, I should not let morons like that bother me, but they do.  It hurts and it's just one more hurt on top of decades of hurt.  I never react, I can't -- I just take it.  Sometimes I pray for them, but more often I go home,  cry alone, and turn to food for comfort, the absolute worst thing to do.   Fear also hinders my weight loss effort.  I truly can empathize with the lady who referred to her skin as "pizza dough".  I, too, would rather be obese than have a mountain of hanging skin.  Does everyone who loses a lot of weight have it?  Are there options other than surgery to deal with it? Years ago (during the thin years), I had an operation under general anesthesia and went into cardiac arrest.  Since then, I've had other procedures and have turned up severely allergic to a lot of drugs.  Bypass surgery and post-weight-loss skin removal are out of the question for me, both physically or fiscally.    None of the above are excuses for not losing weight, but they are obstacles I'm facing as I try to get my head straight so I can stick to a plan to change my life and my lifestyle.  I bought the books, read them many times, but I can't seem to get that "click" to work in my brain.  Fighting depression about being obese followed by eating to comfort myself because I'm depressed about being obese isn't working but I can't seem to get off that merry-go-round.