Topic : 06/15 Bad Brides

Having been a floral designer for over 20 years, I have had to deal with several Bridezillas. Most, thank goodness, never attacked me, but I have seen Brides literally SCREEM at their mothers and sometimes even the Groom. I always thought to myself, "Your Mother is paying for your wedding and you talk to her like that??" And I feel sorry for the grooms!  I also have to say I ran into a couple Groomzillas as well and have felt sorry for the Bride. I guess I just don't understand the atitudes and how people can feel they are entittled to a big wedding at all costs. My brother said he should have thrown the cash on the table and said go elope to my niece. Only thing was, the huge wedding was my sis-in-law's idea there, not my niece's. Oh well! I guess God gave me the grace to handle these types and gave me the ability to keep my mouth shut and not say what I am thinking! 

You go Dr. Phil! 

Val 

Rachel seems completely immature and not even ready to commit to a marriage if she acts like that about one day out of her life.  And actually, Rachel, it's not YOUR wedding unless YOU are paying for it.  Yes, you get to make some decisions but they should be decisions that respect your father and mother's money.  And believe me, no one cares that much about your wedding anyway.  Everyone will forget it the week after it happens.  Wouldn't you rather have a wonderful day filled with happy family and friends than worry about the perfect color of roses or the perfect style of cake?  99% of the guests at your wedding won't even really remember what your dress looks like or how you wore your hair!!! These types of things are so insignificant.  What's important here is that you're making a commitment to your fiance to spend the rest of your life with him.  I've been married for 3 years.  I had a great wedding at about 15K which even now I think seems like too much.  But I can tell you that I honestly do not remember what we had to eat or even what the bridesmaids' flowers looked like.  But I can tell you that I remember the most important part....standing up in the church in front of everyone and promising vows to each other.  That's what's important.  Not the lobster or filet mignon. 

I couldn't believe what I was hearing with this last bride on your show today.  I don't even think Dr. Phil knew how to deal with her.  That's the feeling I was left with.  Sometimes I guess you just have to walk away and shake your head.  That's about how it felt when Dr. Phil walked to meet with Robin to leave the show today.  It looked as though he was perplexed and maybe a little ticked?? 

I'm just sorry that she was allowed to even be on the show.  She doesn't want to listen.  It was frustrating to watch!! 

Rachel is acting like a spoiled brat.  She is totally missing the point about coming together with a warm heart in front of witnesses (all attendees).  By the time HER BIG DAY (not their big day - forget the poor groom - who is he anyway but a stand-up prop to her?) arrives most people would rather be anywhere but at the big production.  I believe that Rachel has forgotten the meaning of the word wedding (to wed, join) and has substituted production.   

When she watches this tape months or years from now she will be so ashamed of her behavior.   

Yes, her mother is being a bit too controlling but I believe her heart is in the right place.  Rachel is being totally self centered (rather than family centered) and combative.  She needs to grow up first.  Maybe she should postpone until she is more mature.  By then she can afford the production she believes she is "entitled" to have.  She can earn it first! 

I was dismayed when Rachel said she thought that her wedding day will be the last day when she will be important.  I am hoping that she was just making excuses for her bad behaviour.  A wedding is a nice celebration and I recall mine with fondness, but the details of the location, decorations and food certainly weren't important. The important stuff, the things that live in my memory, are the people who we love and who love us being there to wish us well. 

As far as the wedding day being the best day of your life....for your sake, I sincerely hope it isn't.  Now, after 22 years of marriage, my wedding day isn't even in the top 10 days ...and I hope that by the time I am on my deathbed that it won't score in the top 100. 

Thank you!!  As a new bride, who planned her whole wedding (made the veil, center peices, boquets, inviations, etc), it is stressful.  I had two bridzilla moments.  One when other brides kept getting assisted after me when I was there first (I would have been pissed in a coffee shop) and when my fiance ordered double brested suites (you have to support me on this one).  I had my wedding for $6,000 total.  It was hell planning and I didn't even get to enjoy the day until I started downing wine after dinner to cope with my mother.   

I think it's the "keeping up with the Jones" mentality that is killing these young brides (and their parents' pocket book).  Too much emphisis is placed on the wedding and not the marriage. 

In my case it was my mother that nearly caused me to bail days before the wedding.  I didn't get what I wanted (to elope) because I had to do what everyone else wanted (family, extended family, friends, etc) only to have my mother ask why I didn't elope the night before my wedding.  We're fine now though.  It's stressful and these brides need a smack in the face from the groom, mother, florist, what ever, to keep it real.  But, it is stressful and there are other situations besides the need for perfection that are making them freak out.