Quote From: dizzy_lizi have been married for 2 years and my husband has become so critical of my self and our kids, we have a 1 year old girl and my son who is 9. My husband seems to have changed so rapidly, his temper is becomming scary, he has only hit walls etc, but where does it stop?? he says the nastiest things to me and the kids and tries to make us all feel as bad as humanly possible. Last night my daughter tripped over and he went bollistic and punched a hole in the door, he then told me to get my stuff out of his room and that he was going to "find a root" "some one who would put out". i have a lowered sex drive because of the medication i am on for my heart and i am constantly tiered, i have to keep the house spotless or he spends the night cririsizing and telling me that the place is a pig sty.
We have also been told recently that he may have another kid out there possibly two and these kids may have been from before we got together, but he told me that there was no chance in hell that theye were his and now i found out that the excuses he gave me are lies. He has even spoken of going for custody of one of them!
i am tired of all of this, when do you know that enough is enough? how can you tell when you have tried every thing possible? My health is paying for it too, i am on antidepressants, my thyroid is over active and i am having trouble with my heart, i am at the lowest point in my life and i dont know if i can get myself up again.
But i am terrified of a custody battle and what that would mean for my kids. HELP
First off, talk to your physician about the side effects you are experiencing and let him know that they are impacting your life in a serious way. Sometimes there are other drugs to try and sometimes the symptoms f the side effect needs treatment. If there are no medical answers, ask your husband to see your physican with you so he can have your condition fully explained. He may see the lack of physical love as a sign that you don't love him. The visit to the physician will clear any misunderstandings up.
I know it is difficult in the middle of other problems to pay attention to expressing love to your spouse, but that is when you need to do it the most. You can give him a sensual foot massage, make a special meal for you two, compliment him and tell him you love him.
I have been very sick on occasion but I was always able to please my husband sexually-even just with a hot-oil, hand job. Try it, it really is pleasant for your husband and it might make you happier if you gave yourself opportunities to connect with him sexually again.
You may need some counselling. Having an illness and living with these side effects is a big thing to accept. It sounds like you have some real pain and unhappiness to get through and a counsellor will help.
Your husband needs anger management counselling. He should see a counsellor to deal with his inappropriate responses and you need to make it clear that his behaviour needs to change or you will take the children and leave him.
Once you have tried all of that, I think you can say that you have tried everything possible.
Just as a precaution, look into what you need to be self sufficient. Get any training you need and update your skills and networking. Maybe even find a job. You may find that he isn't prepared to make the changes he needs to make and if that's the case you need to be able to protect your children from him.
If your marriage is on the rocks, how do you know whether to call it quits or give it one more try? April says that after only a few months of marriage, she received a voicemail on her cell phone from her husband, Jon, saying that he wanted a divorce. This was while she was in the hospital connected to a feeding tube! She says she has no idea what changed all of a sudden and wants some answers. Jon just wants her to sign the divorce papers. Should they try to work things out and give their marriage another try? Then, Kristen is torn between keeping her family and marriage together, or keeping the sparks alive with her current lover. Her husband, Brian, recently moved back into their house because he wants to try and save their eight-year marriage. Does a marriage that was started by infidelity and hurt by infidelity have a chance of surviving? Dr. Phil has strong advice for these parents who are fighting, lying and cheating -- all in front of their young children. Join the discussion.
