Topic : Borderline Personality Disorder

Hello...

My name is Natalie jo.  I have borderline personality disorder, bipolar disorder and severe anxiety with diabeties two, which can also affect your mood.  The lower your sugar goes after being high, the more depressed you will be.  The more sugar you take in the higher you will go...

 

anyway

I am trying to find a place I can chat with other people and talk with.  IT seems like all the message boards I can find are for Bipolar disorder or severe anxiety.  There isnt much of anything for borderline personality disorder.

 

I am working on my borderline with a therapist.  And I am working on it by reading about it, guide workbooks and books that are very informative with them ...

 

Barnes n Noble, online, contains many books ...that help people deal with their disorder, so I would suggest it to anyone.

 

I recieved this disorder from my mom, who my granmother gave it toooo and so it goes...

my mom does not admit she has borderline ...but I know fully well she does ...

 

but I had a hard time growing up with my mother, she wanted power and control and was VERY manipulative...

 

I deal with her as of now ... one because

I love her very deeply... but also because I live with her while I am getting my degree in English lit and major in library science ...

Thanks for listening or reading

 

always

natalie jo

Hi,

    My name is stacey and i'm 20 years old. I read your post. I do not have a degree or in school but I like to study psychology. From what you have said he might have some sort of anger disorder. He sounds like he feels maybe inferior, or his selfesteem is very low. I know for a fact that almost all sociapaths have been known to hurt animals, but I do not think that is whats wrong. I believe he may feel trapped and i mention this yet again, he probably feels very bad about himself and does not know how to express his feelings in a healthy manor.

 

I have a few qustions for you......

Was he abused as a child (in any way)?

Has he ever hurt another person?

When he hurt animals, how old was he, why did he do it, and was there satisfaction in him?

In what way is he controlling? (give examples)

Is he able to express/ talk about any otherfeelings?

Is he able to tell the difference between different fellings?

Does he use steroids or take any medications.

 

If you could answer these questions I might be able to give you an answer. Also, if there are any other problems or Symptoms let me know. Once again I am not a doctor and I don't attend school. But I have a dsm4 and several collage books on psychology and I have been reading and studying them sence I was 8 years old.

 

                                                                                                        Sincerely,

                                                                                                                Stacey

Welcome Natalie

I'm glad you found BPD board but can you not use the red on a long message it was a bit hard to read early in the morning for me Sorry hope I didn't  offend you.

Have a good day
Eclaire

Hi,

I have been in a relationship with and finally married a woman with BPD. Our first years together were stessful and a living hell for her. With the suicide attempts and drug overdoses along with the angry and hostile ourbursts, life was almost unbearable at times. I read and studied as much as I could find out about the disorder. But even with the disorder, I saw past the symptoms. I saw and got to know a very warm, kind and loving person whom I fell in love with. Your mom may also be like that. Underneath all of the disorder symptoms there may be a loving and kind person. One of the major characteristics of the BPD patient is that they will try their best to drive away those who are closest to them and love them the most. They don't intend to do so but it is part of the disorder. The angry outbursts are another major characteristic from my experience with my wife. She has stopped attempting suicide after her last attempt whereby she almost died. She was in a coma for three days and not expected to come out of it. I prayed for her constantly day and night. After three days she came out of the coma. Don't stop loving your mom and don't let her lose contact with you or her grandchildren. But do lay down some firm boundaries and rules for contact. Supervised if necessary.  Driving away those who love them the most  is the most difficult characteristic to deal with emotionally. I have empathy for you and your brother for the life you must have had growing up with the BPD symptoms in your mother. But by driving their loved ones away the BPD do what they fear the most, they are abdoned and left alone. My wife has come out of that dark period of her life. She is a survivor. She is a very warm, caring and loving person. She was doing well until she had her thyroid burnt out due to Grave's Disease. And then a few years later she had to have a full Hystorectomy. That threw her hormones out of balance. Her mood swings have been difficult to live with. She has angry outbursts and then she is aplogetic for her behaviour when she settles down.  Faith holds us together and a belief in Christ. Pray for your mom and tell her you love her because she is your mother and even though she may have angry outbursts, underneath it she loves you. Even if you don't agree with her actions. As one of the comments said, she is your mother, even if you don't agree with her. Try to get as much info as you can about BPD and the characteristic and symptoms. Talk to her doctors and tell them how your mom is reacting. Most times the BPD  patient don't have a great deal of recall of their actions. For your mom to have raised a family, she too is a survivor of her disorder. GOD BLESS!  My wife and I will pray for you.

Hi Natalie,

My wife has suffered with BPD since she was nineteen. One thing I have learned about her since we first met twelve years ago, she is very intelligent. It sounds like you also have that intelligence. As an old saying goes: There is a fine line between Intelligence and Insanity. If you have done a lot of reading on the topic of BPD you will have come to realize that many of the great literary and artistic people of the world have suffered from BPD. Just to let you know. My wife has not attempted suicide or an overdose since 1999. She has a will to live now even with her upset hormones after having her Thyroind burnt our and having a full Hystorectomy. She still has angry outbursts at times but not as bad as they used to be. Her mother also has been a great support to her. Even thought they have had their differences over the years. There is an unconditional love between them. My wifes faith in God has helped her to survive. GOOD LUCK with your studies and GOD BLESS!

It's been quite awhile since I posted on this board cuz I keep forgetting it's here. Saw several posts about medications, so I just wanted to put my 2 cents out there.

 

For those new to the diagnosis and for those that just don't know, there are no medications that can treat BPD. There are medications that can help with some of the symptoms since a lot of us with this disorder have comorbid diagnoses like depression, anxiety and bipolar, but as someone else recently mentioned, it can take a long time to find the right cocktail.

 

I was on 21 different medications in various combinations over the course of 3 & a half years. It was fairly easy to find medications to help with my anxiety (Valium is the only one that works for me) and for my racing thoughts, inability to sleep & impulse control problems (Seroquel was the magic drug for those). The hardest one was finding something to ease my severe depression.

 

I'd tried nearly every anti-depressant from nearly every classification including:

• SSRI's like Prozac, Zoloft and Paxil
• SSNRI's like Effexor
• Atypical Cyclics like Wellbutrin
• Tricyclics like Elavil and Pamelor

My pdoc even tried off-label use of drugs like Neurontin and Ritalin in hopes of breaking my crushing depression. Most didn't work and the ones that did only worked for short periods of time, maybe 6 months tops, before I ended up maxing out on the dosage. I was so desperate to be free of my depression that I even went so far as to get a VNS (vagus nerve stimulator) implant last summer, which unfortunately didn't work either.

 

I'd refused to take any of the anti-depressants in the MAOI classification because of the severe dietary restrictions and the reason behind them. With my suicidal and self harm tendencies, I feared I would deliberately eat or drink something I wasn't supposed to in hopes of causing great injury or death.

 

It wasn't until my last hospitalization this past October that my pdoc recommended a different MAOI that didn't have the strict list of foods you had to avoid. It's a drug called Eldepryl (selegiline hydrochloride is the generic name) that is typically used to treat Parkinson's disease. This drug has been a life saver for me and I wanted to mention it because no where in all my research on depression did I ever come across this medication.

 

I know that everyone responds differently to medications, but if you feel you've tried a lot of others to no avail, this is one you might want to discuss with your doctor. There are still things you need to avoid while on this medication, including many of the other anti-depressants and you can't take over the counter cold medications, but the list of foods to avoid is much smaller than with other MAOI's like Nardil.

 

There is also a newer MAOI that comes in patch form called Emsam. Since it isn't ingested, there are even less dietary restrictions. It was just approved by the FDA last year so Medicare & Medicaid do not cover it, or at least didn't when I last checked. I've only known one person that has tried it but it didn't work for them.

 

Hope this info is helpful.

Sid

I think that I might have this disorder.. not because I'm paranoid, but because I've been researching It and I've found that I have all of the symptoms except for the temper tantrums... and the one thing that has been key to me even considering that i may have this, is the described situations of not being part of reality. I've been having brief situations such as those described in online articles and books that always scare me half to death. That's been happening for about two years now and I've never been able to decribe it, until i finally found the discription online. It's probably the scariest thing ever, but it only lasts 5 to 10 seconds. My mom was disgnosed with this disorder.. and it scares me that I could have gotten it from her.. or that I could have it at all. Everything that I've read about it, seems as if it was written about me, and I'm scared that I might suffer from this disorder.

 

idk..

Hello, I have just this week been diagnosed with this BPD. In some ways its a relief, in others it's obviously not.

 

I have had a horrible life in many ways. Beginning with physical abuse at home then unable to hold on to relationships, jobs and homes. Repeated suicide attempts. Trying to hold on to people so that they wouldn't leave me alone - just chaos everywhere I look. Alcohol abuse has made things harder but it's the only thing I have had to fill up the empty place, I used to think I'd just gotten broken when I was a kid.

 

To find out that this misery has a name is a relief, I'm unsure what the future holds though? How do I learn to live again? How do I keep myself safe from the abusive relationships I have been involved in? (I can pick a controlling man out of a line up with my eyes closed!).

 

Has anybody got any advice?

 If you think you might have this then you must consult. There is nothing to me scared of once we have a name to how we feel it is much less scary. Beside life can be well managed if a person chooses to get help and really tries etc...My life is very manageable now.

Eclaire